At Silverlock Castle, Part 3

Having finally dropped the last of the Scoobies off at Silverlock Castle, Square disappeared without so much as a word to the gang.

Not that they noticed.

"I already apologised for Ultros, like, a million times," said Buffy. "How many more times do I need to say it before you shut up?"

"Depends," said Angel. "How many more times will it take to bring Gunn back?"

"Please stop trying to antagonise her," said Giles. "You won't fix things that way. Besides, other mistakes have been made here."

"You mean like when Buffy ran off?"

"And let you near Macduff? Not specifically what I was getting at, no."

"Then I assume you're talking about Xander being born."

"You should stop blaming Xander," said Illyria. "Gunn himself got Fred killed by smuggling my sarcophagus into Wolfram and Hart, but you forgave him for that."

"Wolfram and Hart?" shouted Giles. "That's where Gunn worked?"

"Oh my God! Fred's dead?" said Willow.

"Yeah," said Angel, suddenly turning on Willow. "I guess now you know why Illyria looks exactly like her, don't you?"

"Hey! Leave Willow alone!" said Xander. "You can put me down if you want, but Willow didn't do anything."

"He's right," said Spike. "Couldn't even guard her spell book." He'd regret that a second later, but he was under too much stress to think clearly, and figured that would be the best way to hurt Xander.

"Excuse me," said Willow. "I believe that reading the spell book was my job, and guarding it yours. And, besides, Xander did stop the war. And he didn't get anyone killed doing it. And as for what happened to Gunn," she said, more shyly now, "well, that's horrible. But it isn't all Xander's fault. It sounds like Gunn was being sorta reckless."

"So you're saying he deserved to die?" said Angel.

"Of course not," said Willow quietly. "I just meant that, maybe if Gunn hadn't been quite so careless with his life…"

"A lot of heroes are careless with their lives," said Angel. "It takes someone different to be careless with other peoples'."

"That's not fair," said Buffy. "Xander is a great man. Can you imagine what it takes to do what he does, without any powers?"

"More courage than hearts or brains, if you ask me," said Spike. "If this lion would stay out of the line of fire, then our super-powered selves wouldn't have to waste precious attention on him. And I still say that it's his fault that Ty Lee chick took Macbeth."

"Well, she might have saved us," said Giles. "I'm no fan of Ozma's politics, but she seems to get stuff done. Maybe we'll find Macbeth in one piece, and the torture will make him more redeemable. It certainly couldn't hurt at this point."

"You think bad guys become nice after you torture them?" said Angel. "Sorry, but not in my experience. And I have something else to say, too. I don't think anything we've done quite compares to what you've done. Not just today, either. You know why Fred's dead? Because, in my time, when I called you guys to help bring her back, Giles put me on hold. Okay, so maybe that's not quite the reason, but it was a factor."

"Well, if you worked with Gunn at Wolfram and Hart, you can't blame us for severing ties with you," said Giles.

"What's Wolfram and Hart?" asked Buffy.

"A law firm that specialises in catering to demonic and evil clientele," said Giles. "I guess we now know how Mr. Gunn could become a lawyer with a 'glorified daycare' like Yale as his alma mater."

"Yeah, we all worked at Wolfram and Hart," said Angel. "I was CEO. And while you were sitting on your ass doing nothing about it and looking down your noses at us, we were taking it apart from the inside."

"Right," said Xander. "I'm sure you were right on that."

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"

"You said you were the CEO," said Xander. "Somehow, I don't think you got there by driving the company into the ground."

"I was afraid this might happen," said Dumbledore's voice. The elderly wizard walked slowly into the room, and leaned against a nearby chair. "I have seen much better friends fight over much smaller things. To be honest, I am surprised that you've lasted as long as this before you had a schism. Nevertheless, we have an alternative."

"You're sending them home?" said Giles.

"No," said Dumbledore calmly. "That would be silly. We are going to split you into two teams. Not the most desirable scenario, perhaps, but we have no choice now. If you go out together, in your current state, you will almost certainly fail."

"But we can't find the Bearers without a Slayer," said Angel.

"Fortunately, Slayers just happen to be as common as grains in a Time-Turner these days."

On cue, a second figure, young and pretty, stepped into the room. It was Faith.

"Hey, B," she said. "Guess I finally get to come along on your world-saving thing."

"How long were you waiting?" said Giles.

"Only about five minutes of briefing time," she responded. "Seemed like ages, though. You wouldn't believe how boring Mr. Peabody can be when he sets his mind."

"You will have one night to rest," said Dumbledore, "then each team will be sent to a different world. Now, if there are no objections…"

"I want to go with Xander," said Illyria.

"Well, I don't see why not," said Dumbledore. "You won't have problems getting along with them, I take it?"

"No," she said. "I was not involved in any of the petty squabbling with these mortals and vampires."

"Good," said Dumbledore. "Are there any other requests to be placed with a loved one? Angel? Spike?"

"Absolutely not," said Angel angrily. "I am not following Buffy around like a love-sick puppy!"

"I'm good, too," said Spike.

"And you, Buffy?" said Dumbledore. "Do any of these gentlemen still catch your eye?"

"No," said Buffy. "I'm not abandoning my friends to run around with these jerks—however hot they may be—in Narnia or the View Askewniverse or wherever they end up next."

"A wise choice," said Dumbledore. "I wish I had your ability to resist the charms of the bad boy when I was your age. Try to have a good night's sleep. There's no telling when you'll get another."

Then Dumbledore walked out of the room. Two doors appeared, one on either side of the chamber, and the two teams each headed towards their own.

*

"So, you're actually over Buffy?" said Angel. "I must admit, you have better will power than I thought. I'm surprised you didn't ask to join her team before the old guy even said we were being divided into teams."

"Right. Like you didn't see Nina as a silver metal."

"Hey! I find that offensive. I loved her."

"Sure ya did, Angel. Sure."

*

"I suppose you would not wish to sleep in the same bed as me," said Illyria.

Xander glanced nervously at Buffy and mouthed 'help' to her.

"You do not have to worry," continued Illyria. "That was a joke. Although I wish to remain in your company, I understand that the incident with Gunn will make further romantic developments between us impossible. Yet you do not laugh. It was my first joke, so that is to be expected."

"Uhh… well, hang in there," said Xander.