A/N: I didn't particularly want to go in to Leon's reaction to Gwen telling him about King Ayden so I thought I would try and move the story along! In this chapter, Guinevere will have to act like a queen again….Anyway; I hope you enjoy this chapter. I don't own Merlin!
After the incident of me fainting, Life in Camelot went back to normality. Well- to a certain extent. I still didn't feel like I was coping, but now I knew that I had Gaius and Leon to whom I could talk to.
Although, life in Camelot was peaceful, there were events surrounding us which were not. King Lot and King Dagr (who was Cenred's nephew) were quarrelling and there was talk of war. Apparently, King Dagr had been deliberately impertinent to the king which started off the quarrel. Since King Lot and Dagr's kingdoms border Camelot, war would cause problems for us and I couldn't help but feel slightly overwhelmed at the prospect of trying to sort out the problems.
We (The knights, King Ayden and I) were sitting around the round table trying to decide what to do about the two kingdoms. My hatred for King Ayden was magnified as he had taken the seat to my right which Arthur had sat in and by him sitting there; it reminded me of Arthur's absence. I felt a physical pain of losing Arthur all over again as my eyes filled with tears. I quickly tried to pull myself together. Camelot needed me, more than ever, especially, with the threat of the war. This didn't take the pain I was feeling away entirely but it was replaced with a different feeling. One which I hadn't felt for a lot time: Determination!
Although, recently I had tried to not intervene in whatever the elders believed best for Camelot as I only seemed to be able to focus upon the pain of losing Arthur, this was the first time where I knew that I had to as the knights around the table were determined not to do anything.
"Surely, you can sort out a treaty of some sort so as to protect yourselves from being dragged into the war? You need to something." King Ayden told the table.
Even though, I utterly despised him I needed to admit that he was right. Unfortunately, not a lot of the knights agreed. Well….apart from two: Leon and Percival.
They had realised that if the knights were forced into the war between the two Kingdoms, that the risk of doing so was great. They had lost many of their friends and fellow knights fighting Morgana and I could sense their uneasiness at fighting in someone else's war.
I knew I had to speak up and try and persuade the rest of the knights.
"King Ayden is right…"My voice shook at the words, and even Leon who was sitting next to me looked surprised.
"…if we don't do anything, the war will cause numerous problems for us. Those of you who think that we won't be forced to pick a side, is wrong. Either Lot or Dagr will ask us for help! In refusing or helping one, we are alienating the other. Even if they don't force us in to the war, our trade and supplies will be interrupted. Who would be comfortable harming the people of Camelot's trade? I for one, I would not. I do not want Camelot harmed if it can be prevented. We need to make a treaty stating that we are neutral as a way of preventing it!" I told the men at the round table. As I got more passionate, I was getting more certain that what I was saying was right.
As I looked at the shocked faces on the table, I realised that I hadn't be so vocal in over a year.
For the first time, since Arthur's death I felt like a queen. I tried not to focus upon King Ayden's smirk but I couldn't help it as his handsome face had a slightly evil look upon it. I shivered at the look of it and quickly swivelled around to look at Leon.
Leon, however, looked at me with pride, happiness and I instantly smiled at him. I knew that he had faith in me and the reason I did now was entirely because of him. Even though, other people had attempted to try and help me feel like I deserved to be queen, Leon was the only one which had made any difference. Why it had I don't really know. Leon had stayed with me through everything and the look he was giving me, made me feel happy.
Although, the whole way through the speech I had wished that Arthur was here backing me up and sitting next to me, I finally felt comfortable in the belief that I was a queen which Camelot needed and deserved.
At first, after Arthur's death I saw being the queen as a burden. Something which I couldn't do properly, as I wasn't worthy since the only reason I was queen was because of Arthur but because he had died, I didn't have any reason to be queen.
But now, it was different. I knew that I could help keep Arthur's legacy going whilst trying to heal the pain I was feeling about him.
A/N: Okay, here is chapter 13. I hope you don't mind that I've tried to make Guinevere slightly happier. Although, there will still be quite a lot of unhappiness and hurt. Next time, I will try and include Percival! Please review.