"You want me to be your what?" I whispered as I pushed my chair away from the table. Elliot stands and tries to grab my hand, I pull my hand back. "No Elliot this is wrong, so wrong. I lo.. Like your brother. I'm so sorry if I lead you on or anything, I just want to be friends with you." I said as I grabbed my things of the table and walked out, I heard Elliot call my name as he followed me out of the cafe. I run to my car and unlocked the door. "Ana please stop just wait!" he yelled. He grabbed my hand off the car door and pulled me around. He pulled me into his chest and threw his arms around me. I tried to push back, I tried to push away but he just held me closer. Before I knew anything I felt his lips on my" Fell that.' He asks on my lips. I push off his chest again and this time I got out of his grasp. "I like Christian." I said as in a low voice. I got into my car and pulled out of the car park. I drove down the street until I find myself driving over two hours. I didn't know where I was just that I was in a little tiny with only a motel and a gas station. I just needed to get away, far away to think about things. I took my cell phone out of my back pocket as I thought two missed calls from mum and dad and a one unread message from Elliot; before I even read it I delete it. I didn't want to think about him, or any of the greys I just wanted to be by myself for a little while. I like Christian maybe even love him as crazy as it seems, after everything all the hurt and the pain. I'm still madly in love with him and i don't know what to do. I have work today and from my understanding Christian is going to be working with his father this afternoon.
After a few more hours and a call to my mum and dad I was on my way home. I took the drive home long and slow still thinking about what had happened that day.
Once I got home I walked up the outside steps and into the house. I went into my room and grabbed my PJ's off my bed. I needed to relax and the only thing I could think of was a nice hot bubble bath in our large over size bath. Once I got into the bathroom I poured out some jasmine oil and bubble a bath mix into as well. I undressed and slowly got into the bath. I needed things time to relax.
Xox
as my phone beeped for me to get out of bed I pulled the cover's back over my head, i didn't want this day to start, I didn't want to see anybody I wanted to be alone FOREVER! After a few more minutes in my nice warm pulled I went over to my draws and pulled out some nice clothes for my day at work. I raced to the bathroom, closed the door and locked it, I then undressed and jumped into the shower, I cleaned myself and hair. While i was in the shower I couldn't pulled the thoughts of the kiss between me and Elliot. I really like him as a friend and a close one at that but this has just made me rethink our whole friendship altogether. All though I still have feelings for Christian I feel he doesn't share the same feelings. I feel like I'm at a standstill with him and I don't think it will ever change. In the back of my mind I don't want it to change, just work on a friendship and the other side wants more.
After my long hot and relaxing shower I head to my bedroom to get ready for work, I hope that Elliot doesn't show up at the office today as I am so confused with everything that is going on right now. I know that Christian is going to be with his father today I I'm not sure how I feel about it as I work very closely with Mr Grey. My heart wants me to jump onto Christian and never let him go while my head tells me no! i feel as if I am going crazy, the whole time I am thinking of Christian I'm going crazy with what happened with Elliot. I'm not sure that it's not just a mind game. The feelings i have for Elliot are like him been my big brother but him telling me that has feelings for me and wants me to be this girlfriend I feel I am standing in the middle of their family and going to rip it apart. I have made up my mind although i do like working for Mr Grey I feel as if I shouldn't. I have made up my mind; this will be my last day.
As I am taking out my wet towel off my bed my little book that holds every though in it is sitting on my floor only to find that it is opened to the last thing I wrote.
DEAR DIARY
IT HAS BEEN ALONG TIME SINCE I HAVE WRITTEN IN YOU LASTED. A LOT OF THINGS HAVE HAPPEN IN MY LIFE AND IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT I AM DATING THE HOTEST GUY IN SCHOOL. IT WASN'T UNTIL TODAY THAT THE PEOPLE AT SCHOOL FIND OUT ABOUT ME AND CHRISTIAN AND THAT KATE IS DATING CHRISTIAN OLDER BROTHER. KATE AND I HAVE BEEN GETTING ON REALLY WELL; SHE WAS THE ONE THAT TOLD EVERYONE ABOUT ME AND CHRISTIAN. I AM MEETING WITH CHRISTIAN, KATE, MIA AND ELLOIT. I HAVE LIKE 40 MINUTES TO DO SO, SO I BETTER GO AND HAVE A SHOWER AND THEN WAIT UNTIL THEY TURNED UP.
UNTIL NEXT TIME.
I re read this over and over again, i haven't written in it for a few months now and it feels like I have pulled myself away from it, as i still have time before I decide that i am going to write a little something. I grab a blue pen for out of my handbag and start to write.
DEAR DAIRY
Again it has been a very long time since i wrote in you. A lot has changed. A few months ago i was dating the hottest boy in school and life was just great, and now not so much. The hottest boy in school along with his older brother and his brother's girlfriend rang me one night telling me that when i was going out with said boyfriend was just some big joke. I was HEARTBROKEN! I went back to school and things started up again, worsted this time, the bullying never stopped, so one day i just grabbed my car keys, took out all the money in my bank and run. I meet up with a family member and took off with her for a little while. Now my life has changed a lot, i now have an internship with said boy's dad and said boys brother told me he has feelings for me as well as wanted me to be his girlfriend. Don't forget that Christian Brother also tried to kiss me and now I have to go to work with his dad.
well now it's time for me to go, until next time..
ana
I closed the book and put it back under my bed, I pull the blankets back over my bead and grabbed my shoes and everything i needed for work. I walked out to the living room where my mum and dad where watching TV. and gave them a kiss before heading out the door to work. I unlock and jump into my car and up the music as loud as it could go. A few minutes later I pull into the car park of My Grey's law offices and get out, grab my things and lock my car door. While I was walking to the office door I heard my name been called form a distance. I turn around and see that it is Elliot. I yell Elliot now is not the time, turned around and headed into the main office doors. Before I could take another step I was pulled around by my left arm. "Shut up and just listen ok?" he said. I gave a small nod and crossed my arms over my chest. "Ana I'm sorry ok? What i said i didn't mean, well i did mean but please I don't want us to be like this. I want as to go back to how they were." I uncross my arms and push my hair out of my face. "How they were? How can i? You kissed me." As I looked up at his face i seen something be hide him. " you fucken did what" the voice screamed in Elliot's face and then with a big punch to the face Elliot fall to the ground with blood running down his face. "How could you Elliot? How could you kiss her when last night I was telling you how much I want to be with her, how much I love her?" The lasted put of what was said was only a tiny little whisper. Without a moment's notice i was pulled in to Christian's arms with his lip's pushed onto my. I pulled away. " do you mean it Christian?" I asked. "Mean what" he asked. I moved back so I could look up into his eyes. "Mean it when you say you love me." I ask
An- i know a verly long time for an update, i have had a lot of things going on atm. 1st i went to the hospital when my best mate was giving birth to you very cute little girl. It was so great and now i know that been a midwife is in my blood. 2nd i'm been moving house and 3rd i have been re reading fsog the books and a lot of fan fiction stories.
Henderson1993
Ps please review, follow and fave. You guys are the best. And again sorry if there is any fuck up's i am doing this on my phone.