Chapter thirteen: New experiences

NPOV

February 28

God I love these parent free and sister free moments. Because I loved kissing him, I could never get tired of this. We were both on our sides, his hand was in my hair, keeping me close while his tong gently stroked mine. Slowly the kissing turned more needy, lips moving together, from time to time pulling apart gasping for air. He lay on his back, pulling me halfway on top of him, not breaking the burning kiss. My right hip bone was pressed against his… bulge. I felt sexy and powerful and I had been paying attention in the past to the way his body reacted to my every touches and kisses, so I knew how to play him and I felt a little naughty today. As I placed open mouthed kisses in his neck, up to his ear, I noticed smugly how the goose bumps arose, I blew softly in his ear and I felt him shiver beneath me. My insides were twirling and I pressed my body closer against him.

"Ness…" he breathed, and it sounded like a delicious groan "what are you doing?"

"Driving you crazy?" I asked cheekily.

"I'll say!"

I smiled sweetly at him.

"You better be careful you little tease, or I might just end up groping you."

"Maybe I wouldn't mind a little groping…"

Now he did groan and closed his eyes.

"Is this another part of your drive the poor boyfriend crazy plan?"

I didn't answer but kept watching him intently as I took his hand and slowly brought it to my chest.

As soon as he realized what I was doing his eyes snapped open, but he didn't pull away. Our gaze was locked as I placed his hand on my breast. I let go of his hand, he didn't move. I gave him a little smile to let him know it was okay and he softly caressed the outline of my breast.

I slowly turned to lay on my back , pulling him with me so he was now on his side. I saw him swallowing and his gaze left mine to look at my chest where his was still massaging me ever so softly.

"I want to take your shirt off" he whispered.

He wanted to see me, which bra was I wearing? The simple black one. I guess that's all right.

I nodded, not trusting my voice, so he lowered both hands to my hips and slid them underneath my shirt, slowly moving upwards. I sat up and lifted my arms so he could remove the shirt, brushing my sides and arms with his warm hands along the way, making me shiver before I lay down again.

He got comfortable beside me, resting his head on his right hand, while the other roamed from my neck over my shoulder and down my arm.

"God, you are so beautiful" he whispered. He was my boyfriend so he was supposed to say this, but the look in his eyes made sure I didn't question his truthfulness. As heated and wild the kissing leading up to this had been, this moment right now was pure romance and intimacy, it was some sort of surrender to the one I love and trust, I didn't feel self conscious about my body, only worshipped.

His fingertips wandered over my stomach and my breasts as he kept whispering sweet things in my ears. We both knew this was as far as we would get today, and although I felt his erection against my hip and although his soft touches put my skin on fire, neither of us felt frustrated. After a while I removed his shirt as well, wanting to feel his warm skin under my hands. There were occasional kisses, but mostly we looked at each other, taking in the new view and exploring the feel of each others caresses on our bodies.

Later at home I was spread lazily on the couch reading a book. Of course I couldn't focus, my mind kept wandering back to the afternoon. Wow, second base. I was pretty pleased with myself. More than that, reliving the events without the nerves was a major turn on. The memory of his hands on my skin, the loving look in his eyes and knowing that his body wanted mine, feeling it even. It made my body come to live, tingling. I wasn't sure what it wanted, but I knew my body wanted more of him, get closer even, and maybe find out what these warm hands could do for me in different places. I bet he's an amazing lover. My book long forgotten I lost myself in daydreaming.

Until I was called back to reality by a throat being cleared.

Shit, I forgot Jasper in the other sofa, reading as well. My eyes shot up and saw his amused gaze on me.

"That must be an interesting book you got there" he said teasingly. My mortification increased even more, and I fought the urge to hide my red face behind the book.

"You totally enjoy feasting on my embarrassment do you?"

"No, not really. Since that book is clearly not helping you, care to join me on a hunt?"

"Sure" I was relieved that he didn't want to torture me any longer. He could also try to manipulate my feelings, but I never appreciated that and drowning teenage emotions was really exhausting for him. As it would not be tiring me, my feelings would be all over the place again as soon as his effect lifted. I never hunted, but I enjoyed watching them, I had enough venom in my blood to not be in any danger, and today I was sure Jasper planned on tiring me a great deal before I could go to sleep tonight. I thankfully took his hand, and he flung me onto his back running out into the woods.

Jasper was my favorite person to watch on a hunting trip. Of course they all looked magnificent, but seeing Jasper hunt was extra special. When he was in the house, or around town, he always was a little bit tense. He still had some trouble sometimes craving human blood, and being an empath also weighed on him. It made me feel guilty that I put him in an even more difficult position, but if he picked up on that he assured me not to feel guilt, most of my feelings are so pure and radiant, they are a pleasure to be around, he told me. When Jasper gave in to the hunt, all his tension seemed to wash away, and this beautiful confident and almost elegant predator surfaced. He looked absolutely glorious and I watched in awe. As soon as he brought down the deer, he ripped it's jugular and started to drain it. It was then that a delicious smell hit me. I didn't know where it came from, but it urged me forward so I followed my senses. I walked over to Jasper and the scent became stronger, mouthwatering even. I reached him and looked him in the eyes as he continued to suck and drink. Feeling my confusion he let go and whispered "Want a taste?". I was shocked, I don't drink blood, yuck!

"It's okay, just a taste won't harm anyone. You're just curious."

He was right, though, I was curious, I did want a taste. So I slowly got onto my knees and Jasper held up the deer's neck, wound exposed, blood sipping out and dripping on the ground. I lowered my head, intended to just have a quick lick, expecting a foul taste. But as soon as I swallowed it, I knew that this was the delicious scent that pulled me and I started sucking hungrily. My eyes were wide with panic, looking into his, but I couldn't stop drinking. The deer was drained and suddenly I felt disgusted with myself, I pushed it away and ran into the forest, coughing violently, trying to get rid of my stomach content. Jasper easily caught me and calmed me down. He held me to his chest while soothing me "It's alright, we knew this was coming, I have been expecting it, it's alright".

"Please don't tell anyone", I was so ashamed.

"We have to tell Bella and Edward, and they will want to talk to Carlisle."

"I don't want to change, I want to stay human, what about Josh?" I wailed, and started sobbing, overcome by the magnitude of what just happened. My life as I knew it would end.

Jasper held me close and ran back to bring me to bed, ignoring their questions. As soon as he put me down he took out his phone and called Jake to come over. He didn't say out loud why, but I'm sure dad saw enough in his mind…