Getting the hang of it

by kleineanna

So, here's 30 short conversations between different characters, set in the Hogwarts and post-Hogwarts era, exploring things I've wondered about. The stories were written to celebrate my little brother's 30th birthday (happy birthday bro!) and each chapter title describes him somehow. Whether the stories themselves reflect on him, I'll leave up to you...

13. Bon vivant

"Hey, Ron! Harry! Wait up! I have to get something from my dorm!"

"Come on, Hermione! I want to get to the feast!"

"She'll be back soon, Ron. What's the hurry anyway? It's hardly your first feast and they're not starting for a while yet."

"Yeah, but I heard they're doing this ham with honey-glaze tonight and it's supposed to be really good! And then they're serving chocolate mousse for dessert."

"How would you know all that? Ron? Ron!"

"Hmh? Sorry, I was just daydreaming."

"Drooling, you mean. But how do you know about the menu? Did they post it somewhere?"

"No. But it's easy to find out. I asked the Fat Friar."

"Hufflepuff's ghost, the Fat Friar? Why would he know about menus? I thought ghosts didn't eat?"

"They don't. But apparently the good Friar was kind of a … what's that word he used…oh, yeah, a connoisseur of the good things in life. Food in particular. So, he likes to keep up with that, I guess. Anyway, he's the only ghost still allowed in the kitchens, so he's always informed."

"Ok, I'm ready, let's go. What were you talking about?"

"About how Ron now apparently is food buddies with the Fat Friar."

"Food buddies?"

"Yeah, they share menus and recipes and all that. They're best friends, really."

"Not funny, Harry. It's not like that! I just ask him about the menu sometimes. You know, when there's a feast of something. Or on Sundays."

"You see, Hermione? Total best friends."

"Oh, stop it, Harry. The Fat Friar is really nice."

"Not you too, Hermione!"

"No, really, he's one of the nicest ghosts. Did you know he was executed because he kept healing people from the pox?"

"I heard it was because he kept transfiguring cups into rabbits during communion."

"Oh, no, dear boy, I was always lousy at Transfiguration! No, my rabbit-trick was just that, a trick. A simple sleight of hand to amuse the children, and never during Mass. Although I confess, I did use a Communion cup once. Really displeased the abbot that time. Still, I think the rabbit-stew after made it worth it. Simply delicious. Speaking of, wasn't there a feast you meant to go to, Mr Weasley?"

Ron had never run so fast.