New York City M.N. Murder Case
Chapter 13: Jealousy
''That...that's impossible! You're lying, Near!''
''I can assure you, Mello, as much as I wish it was a lie, it is not.''
A shaking finger fell on the red knob which put an end to the call instantly. The blank screen went black as the beautiful, gothic, capital letter L vanished.
A fist covered with dark leather hit the desk in a loud crash. Elena Cabestan bit her lip expectantly.
What's coming is no good for me… She thought, and she was unfortunately right.
Finally, Mello spun his wheel chair around so he could face the french lawyer. He took a deep, jerky breath as he pressed his eyes shut.
''You said I was gonna win that battle…'' His voice was but a quiet, concealed growl.
''And…you didn't?'' Elena tried hesitantly, tilting her head to the side in fake innocence.
''Of course I didn't!'' The blonde man burst out as he rose from his seat abruptly. ''He tricked me! He beat me at my own game! He used his own weakness to turn it into a strength! You said all I had to do was talk about emotions, and I did! And look at me, now! I've just lost at my own game! Once again! And he bested me! Once again!'' He shouted at her, spreading his arms in pure rage. When he finally regained his senses, he sighed deeply as he let himself fall on the tattered sofa in front of Elena's bed.
''It's pathetic.'' He muttered between gritted teeth.
Cabestan frowned slightly, thinking about the best answer to give Mello and that would prevent her from being brutally murdered by a wild, flustered chocolate addict.
''But, uh… Just think about it.'' She began in a steady voice, causing the younger man to look up at her with interest. ''You wanted to talk about emotions with him, so you did. You wanted to put his walls down, you did. You wanted to understand him, you did. You wanted to know what he felt, you did. You wanted to hear the truth from him, and you did!'' She gave him the most radiant smile she could perform.
''He managed to make you uncomfortable not because he wanted to, but just because he answered your interrogation truthfully, perhaps for the first time in forever. You asked about his emotions, and you were so sure he had none, or that he would never express them, that when he did…you didn't believe it. So you didn't lose the battle, Mello. Because if you lost, than he did as well, because he was the one who was compelled to admit something very private and embarrassing. You did nothing but listen to his confession. Therefore, you cannot say you lost the battle!''
Mello arched an eyebrow at this rather strange reasoning. ''That's a way of putting it.'' He said neutrally as he grabbed a bar of chocolate. ''Though I'm not so sure about the fact he didn't do it on purpose, just to make me uncomfortable.''
Croc.
''Oh, but he did!'' She snorted. ''Of course he did! He was about to lose to you, so he had to make the fight more fair. And when he found himself compelled to tell the truth, he did, knowing perfectly that it would shock you, for you never heard him talk about his emotions before. That was his small victory. But you cannot take that away from him, because that's all he got.''
''Hm…'' He mused aloud as he was busy unwrapping his snack. ''So we could say we're even now.''
Croc.
''No.'' She answered without thinking as she met Mello's inquiring gaze. ''I think we could say you still have the upper hand.'' She smiled mirthlessly.
''Why?'' His kidnaper asked as his thin lips slowly curved into a smirk.
''Because the more you call him and ask him intimate questions, the more he exposes himself. Because, contrary to you, he has no one to take advice on what to do nor what to say, and as we both know, he doesn't know how to deal with emotion at all.''
Mello's smile only widened to Elena's best satisfaction.
Croc.
''So what do we do now?''
''Well,'' she shrugged as she lay down in the tiny bed, folding her arms behind her head, ''just keep calling him regularly. Talk about emotions. His emotions. Go further and further into his most intimate thoughts. The more you get some answers, the more he will be obliged to comply. And one day, he'll confess something so…irreparable, so irreversible, that he won't be able to go back anymore.''
Mello crossed his leather-covered legs as he let out a dark chuckle. ''Did someone already tell you you're machiavellian?''
''Yes.'' Elena Cabestan's red lips curled up into a toothy grin. ''But it's far more meaningful when it comes from a mafioso that managed to fool both Kira and L.''
And Mello's smile broadened so far and so wide she thought it was going to reach his ears and hair, and perhaps even the apartment, lightening and warming the bleak atmosphere made of suspicion and anger that was still floating in the whole place.
That night, she— or at least, her body— didn't seem inclined to give up to sleep, so she fidgeted in her sheets, turning back and forth in her damaged bed, causing the mattress to creak unpleasantly.
She sneaked a few glances towards her captor, but much to her relief, Mello was lying flat in the sofa, his legs sprawled almost randomly on what seemed like a soft, but torn material, plunged into a sleep like death.
She sighed deeply as she moved to lie on her back, fixing the yellowish ceiling in useless contemplation.
There's something that still bothers me.
If I cannot sleep, then that means there's still an answer that I lack.
But what is it?
She frowned slightly as she gazed at the man in the dark.
I could wake him up and ask him.
But first of all, I don't even know what to ask. And second of all...
She noticed the gun that laid a few inches away from Mello's hand. She rolled her eyes.
...Second of all, he would kill me.
So that's out of the question.
She turned her head back towards the ceiling.
I have to find the answer myself.
Let's think...
And that was how the events of the last few days played again in her mind, or more precisely, Mello's words resounded in her head, showing her the last missing piece of the puzzle.
''Or should I rather say...Congratulations, Elena Cabestan.''
''And what about your friend?''
''The famous french penal law professor.''
''Your dear lawyer friend.''
''Ask your slave lawyer to do it for you, for all I care!''
''Where is that damned woman anyway?''
''Isn't she spending all her nights with you trying to understand that insane brain of mine?!''
''Your little protégée.''
''I wondered why you would be the exception.''
''Your precious Miss Cabestan.''
''You should really inform yourself better before hiring a new member in your team you know nothing about.''
''You're the pawn, Cabestan.''
''Looks like Near just lost his Queen...''
''Miss your White Queen, Near?''
She straightened up abruptly as her jaw dropped in awe.
Of course! How could I be so blind?
She suppressed the urge to smack her forehead, for the noise would surely catch the attention of the sleeping mafioso.
I always thought those pseudo insults and taunts directed to me were just the show of Mello's anger and frustration towards Near.
I thought he was furious because Mello felt like Near was cheating by employing me, while he was on his own.
But I got it wrong! Since the very beginning, I got it all wrong!
How could I be so stupid?
She tried to steady her breath as she let herself fall on her thin pillow.
I need to check if my assumption is true.
But that is very easy.
She smiled to herself in the dark as a plan was gradually taking roots in her mind.
All I'll have to do is test Mello, and depending on his reaction, I'll know if I were right.
She turned away from the living room to face the blank wall. She closed her eyes as she felt sleep slowly claiming her soul and body.
I know what brought you to say those nasty things, Mello.
You may fool Near, but you cannot fool me.
Not on this.
Elena Cabestan fell asleep, a smile blatantly plated on her features as her last conscient thought filled her brain.
This is called jealousy, Mello.
And I am going to prove it.
The next morning, she was pulled out of her beauty sleep by a strong, fierce smell of black coffee.
She couldn't help but smile in her half-conscious state as her eyes fluttered open. She muffled a groan as she sat up on her bed to look at the scene that spread before her.
A cup of fuming coffee, two toasts of hot bread, and a plate full of scrambled eyes and bacon awaited her on the small table.
She didn't even dare to believe her eyes, so much that they threatened to pop out of her head.
She was brought back to reality by a calm, smooth voice.
''Good morning, Cabestan.''
Elena looked up to meet a radiant Mello, holding a cup of coffee in his left hand and a dark chocolate bar in his right hand.
''Okay, so whether you're planning on proposing to me,'' she began sarcastically, ''or you want something, and you understood you can buy me with food... Since I am absolutely sure you have no interest in me— an opinion that I totally respect, I assure you, even though it still puzzles me— nor in marriage, then I suppose it's the second option, am I right?'' She finished in a sigh.
Mello only chuckled in response. ''You're so smart it's almost annoying, you know that, right?''
''I have been told so.'' She shrugged, before she shot a questioning glance at the blonde. ''So tell me, my dear kidnaper, what do you want to know so early in the morning?''
He made his way towards the table, put his cup on the wooden furniture, sat on the sofa, and crossed his legs, resting his arms on the back lazily. Then he gestured towards the plate in front of the young woman.
''Eat, I'll tell you what I want after your breakfast.'' He said.
''Did anyone tell you you're very talented at manipulating people into getting what you want?'' She smirked at him as she grabbed the cup full of her favorite beverage.
''Yeah, but it's even better when it comes from the queen of manipulation herself.'' He retorted, a sly smile gracing his thin pink lips.
''Good point.'' Cabestan nodded, still grinning.
As she closed her mouth around the last bite of eggs, she noticed Mello's insisting gaze on her.
''Go ahead, Mello.'' She invited him to talk, wielding her fork towards him. ''Tell me what you want.''
''Fine.'' He shut his eyes for a second, before he reopened them, locking his cold gaze with Cabestan's. ''You said I could ask anything of you, remember?''
The french woman swallowed hardly. ''Yes.'' She answered hesitantly. ''So what?''
''So I'm going to ask you a question, and you're going to answer it correctly, without lying, nor hiding the truth. Because if you do, I'll know it. Got it?''
''I got it.'' She agreed as she disregarded her plate on the table. ''I'm listening.''
''Right. We have an agreement, then. So listen very carefully, Cabestan...'' He said, his voice raspy and low as he leant forward to rest his elbows on his knees.
''I'll ask you a question, and you're gonna answer with ''yes'' or ''no'', okay? No buts, no maybes, no anything.''
Elena nodded silently, preparing herself for the much awaited question.
Mello nodded in return and leant back into the couch as his hand grasped a chocolate bar which he started to unpack slowly and nonchalantly. When he was done, he brought the sweet right in front of his parted lips and stared at the woman in front of him, his mouth distorting into a ruthless smile.
''Did you ever get in contact with Kira?''
Croc.
She blinked at him in confusion. When she got away with the astonishment, she lowered her gaze to the floor.
''Yes.'' She whispered.
''Did you know him?''
Croc.
She pursed her lips together as she still refused to look up.
''Answer me, Cabestan!'' Mello raised his voice menacingly as he made a move to get closer to the woman.
''Yes,'' she replied reluctantly, ''I knew him.''
''How?''
Croc.
''One year, he was present to one of my professional meetings. He came to me after the conference to ask me some questions and he invited me to a bar so we could continue this conversation over a drink.'' She explained blankly, as if those were but mere blurred flashes of a past life that held no importance to her anymore.
''What did he want from you?'' The mafioso inquired coolly.
Croc.
''He wanted to know more about crimes of passion, which was the subject of my conference.'' She answered neutrally as she met Mello's burning gaze. ''So I answered his questions.''
''What happened next?'' And the younger man bit in his snack sharply, without leaving the criminologist's eyes for a second.
Croc.
''He wanted to know my opinion on...'' The lawyer trailed off and sighed. ''On Kira.''
Mello opened his mouth, and shut it instantly. ''And what did you say?''
Croc.
''What I really thought.'' She shrugged. ''That Kira might have a great ideal, but he still remains a criminal.''
Near's rival widened his eyes in shock. ''B-But how...how are you still alive?!''
The golden-haired woman smiled sadly. ''I have no idea.''
''What did he do then?''
Croc.
''He said he agreed with me.''
''W-What?! But that's nonsense!''
''I know. I still don't understand why he told me this. Maybe he didn't want me to understand he was in fact Kira. But that was useless.''
''Why?'' He frowned at her. ''How did you understand you were talking to Kira himself?''
This time, a genuine smile graced Elena's stone features.
''Ever since he mentioned the name Kira, I got suspicious. So I excused myself and went to the toilets. Once there, I made a little research about Kira. But I knew I had to make it quick, because if that guy was truly Kira, I could die at any time. So I called one of my old friends who worked at the DGSE— the french secret services— and had some connections with Interpol. I was lucky because he was indeed part of the meetings that dealt with the Kira case, so he had the informations L shared with Interpol. I told him my life was in danger, and knowing that he still had feelings for me, I knew he was going to give in to me.'' She spat those words as if there were nothing more than garbage to her.
''I was, of course, right. He soon revealed what I wanted to know, even though he warned me he will have to tell L about his disclosure and it was highly probable that L's agents were going to search for me to make sure I wouldn't talk about it. But I had what I needed, so I didn't listen to him and I hung up. I knew Kira was in Japan, and it was enough for me. I went back to the bar and I joined the man I knew to be Kira.''
Mello could do nothing but glare at the woman that managed to fool both Kira, L, the DGSE and Interpol all at once with pure amazement.
''How long did it take you to get this information and get back to Kira?''
Croc.
''I remember I checked on my wrist watch. It took me exactly six minutes and forty seconds.''
The blonde man froze at that revelation.
After writing the cause of death, details of the death should be written in the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds.
Holy shit. It's the exact time that's written in the Death Note! That can't be a coincidence! It means that asshole had time to write the cause and details of her death while she retired in the restroom. When she came back to the bar, she was under the control of the note. But...no. This is impossible. If she were, she would be dead in the next 23 days because you can't plan a death after that delay. Then how—
''Uh, Mello...'' A soft voice interrupted his thoughts. ''Are you okay?''
''Yeah, yeah,'' he waved a dismissive hand, ''I just spaced out for a bit.''
''And when you came back, what happened?'' He focused his attention back on his hostage.
Croc.
''Well, then we carried on with the debate on Kira's justice and in the end, I told him I knew who he was.''
''You what?!'' Mello cried out. ''Are you insane, Cabestan, or did you really have suicidal tendencies?!''
''Perhaps both.'' She snorted. ''But I threatened him. I told him he could kill me, but I'd just made a call to an Interpol member, and if I were to disappear right after that call, it would not be that difficult to trace him.''
''You're a madwoman, Cabestan.'' He chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief.
''I know, but that's what allowed me to stay alive.'' She fought back, lifting her chin defiantly.
''Fair enough. So what did he reply?''
''Well, unsurprisingly enough,'' she winced as if in disdain, ''he proposed me to became his ally. ''With your intelligence and mine merged together, we'll be unstoppable. We'll rid the world of Evil. I never found the woman worthy of me before today, but it seems I just did. Come with me, Elena, and we will build a new world together, a pure, new world. We'll defend and protect the weak you tried to defend from those crimes of passion everyday of your life in vain. With us, there won't be any crime anymore.'' He said. Obviously, I didn't fall for it. I told him that the wise and sane man would perhaps obey his rules by fear, but the mad man won't be able to control his pulsions and would kill no matter what sentence awaits for him. Death never was a punition, and it never will. At best, it's an act of mercy.''
Her kidnaper kept quiet for a while, as if pondering what the bold, and perhaps a bit insane, lawyer just said. Eventually, he asked, his voice suddenly hoarse.
''Why didn't you call back the man from Interpol or asked a meeting with L himself to denounce Kira?''
Croc.
''Because Kira was Japanese, so he would be taken care of by the Japanese's justice, who practices the death penalty. And as I said earlier...''
Glowing brown eyes met icy blue as Elena Cabestan spoke, slowly, firmly.
''Death penalty is no punition. I wasn't handing Kira over to the Japanese's justice whereas Japanese's justice was no better than Kira's. Giving Kira to L or giving L to Kira was exactly the same. The proof is here: when they lost, they both died.''
She averted his gaze as she folded her hands on her lap.
''And I must admit I felt pity for him. After all, he was born in a country that practices the death sentence, so of course he'd want to punish the criminals by inflicting death. Who could blame him for that? No one. I knew that killing Kira wouldn't change a thing, just like killing criminals wouldn't either. So I decided to end the game. I was not the world's greatest detective, I was not L who swore to the world that he would catch Kira. I am not childish, I don't hate to lose. I just want a true justice to prevail, and neither Kira's or L's was true justice. In a way, I understood Kira just like I understand criminals, just like I understand you, Mello. You're all humans. You don't deserve to die, you're not carrying an infectious disease that needs to be eradicated. Eradicating criminals won't eradicate Evil. For there is no Evil without Good, just like there is no Good without Evil. This is the world's balance, and it can't be broken.''
Mello frowned ever deeper as he tilted his head to the side.
Croc.
''There's something else.'' He stated.
Cabestan turned her head towards him. ''What?''
''There's another reason why you didn't denounce him. I wanna know it.''
The woman's lips curved into a discrete smile as she nodded. ''That's true, there's something else.''
The young man arched an eyebrow, urging her to develop.
''I didn't denounce him because it was pointless,'' she declared as she locked her gaze with Mello's once again.
''Why?'' He grumbled impatiently.
Croc.
''Because, Mello,'' Elena said quietly, ''that man was already dead inside.''
And the former mafioso found nothing else to say.
Elena sneaked a glance at her captor as he was lying in the sofa, a chocolate bar stuck between his teeth, his gaze fixed on an unknown point in the ceiling.
Now is the time.
I don't know if I'm going to survive this, but I'm doing it for them.
For Mello and Near.
And for you, Matt.
You were right. Someone has to do it.
I am the only one who can carry on with the job.
I will do it.
She took a deep breath as she sat straight on her bed, turning fully towards the blonde man.
''Uh, Mello...'' She began quietly.
The man bit in his sweet fiercely.
Croc.
He bent his head to the side to glare at his hostage with irritation.
''What?'' He growled.
''Can I ask you a question?''
''You just did.'' He muttered. ''But go ahead, ask your second question. I'll see if I wanna answer it or not.''
''Okay.'' Cabestan agreed cheerfully. She cleared her throat before she inquired in the most innocent tone she could perform. ''Do you hate me?''
This time, the dark-dressed man shifted position on the couch to face the french lawyer. He arched a quizzical eyebrow as he snapped. ''What kind of question is that?''
''It's, well...my question.'' The young woman replied bluntly, a hint of a smile gracing her red full lips.
Mello rolled his eyes as he rested his back against the sofa in a weary move.
''No, I don't hate you, Cabestan.'' He said in a groan, almost reluctantly. ''But you're so...''
''So...what?'' The criminologist quirked an eyebrow.
''So...''
''Yes?''
''So, uh...''
''I'm waiting...''
''Argh! Shut up, Cabestan!''
''Alright. But I'm still waiting...''
''Dammit! You're so fucking annoying!'' He shouted, then, pointing a finger at her, he claimed in victory. ''That's it! You're so annoying you're making me lose my mind!''
At his greatest surprise, the law professor only smiled widely.
''I see. And may I know why I am so annoying to you?'' She questioned, and something in her voice was slightly different, more venomous, more dangerous.
''I don't know, you're so...I mean, you're just...well, you!'' He let out angrily as he gestured towards her with a twist of his hand.
''Yes, I am aware of my identity, Mello, thank you.'' Elena sneered. ''But I want to know what you find so infuriating in my person?'' As she noticed the blonde's skeptical gaze, she found the motivation in her to present her arguments. ''This is just curiosity, but that would help both our understanding and our cooperation greatly, you know.''
''Yeah, well...'' He raised a hand to his temples and started massaging them absently. ''Well, I...''
Suddenly, his face twitched into a grin of pure fury as he let his hand fall at his side.
''I don't bloody know, okay?!'' He cried out, his voice more raspy than ever. ''I don't know why you're so annoying to me, but you are! And I suggest you stop being that unbearable, 'cause I'm not your buddy and I can end your life right away if I want to! So now you'll behave, is that clear?''
''Yes.'' Came Cabestan neutral answer. But the truth was, she was fighting herself not to show the satisfaction that was slowly overwhelming her. ''But I think I can help you with that, if you want me to, of course...'' She tried, her voice as quiet as possible, waiting for Mello's rage to unleash upon her.
Instead, the blonde scratched his chin thoughtfully, as if weighing the pros and cons of her proposition. Eventually, he raised his head, his cold eyes piercing through Elena.
''Right. If you're so smart, then tell me. Why do I find you so annoying, uh?'' He snickered disdainfully.
Elena Cabestan suppressed the sigh that was threatening to escape her lips as she thought.
Shit. He's going to kill me.
He is right. I may truly have suicidal tendencies.
But despite everything, she spoke, her voice firm and strong, for she wasn't afraid anymore.
''You want an answer to your questions? Very well, Mello. Be ready, because here it comes.'' She declared solemnly.
''You find me annoying because Near chose to kidnap me in order to help him catch you. You find me annoying because he never wanted any help, except mine. You find me annoying because I was standing at his side. You find me annoying because you kidnaped me, and yet you have the feeling I'm still on his side. You find me annoying because I keep defending him, even when you're pointing a gun at me. You find me annoying because he trusts me. You find me annoying because he needs me.''
The more she was talking, the more Mello's fists clenched at his side, the more his eyes narrowed at her, the more his brows twitched with pure hatred, the more his shoulders shook with concealed rage.
''You find me annoying because he wanted my help, not yours. You find me annoying because I am standing by his side, and you are not. You find me annoying because he placed his trust in me, not in you. You find me annoying because he trusts me with his life and reputation, not you. And finally...''
Mello's features distorted into the most terrifying cringe she had ever seen, his lips curled up into a grin of pure disgust and hate, his eyebrows furrowed so deeply they could have entangled together.
If he were the fawn in the story, you could be sure he was about to charge his prey, and at the moment, his prey was no other than Elena Cabestan, who dared to speak the unquestionable, unacceptable truth.
''You hate me because he needs me, not you.''
And this was too much.
Elena knew she had crossed the line when a blonde fury fell down on her, strong arms preventing her from moving, rough hands wrapped around her neck as she gradually felt air leaving her lungs.
But she didn't care. She had not said her last word yet. And if she was dying at Mello's hands, she would be dying with him knowing the truth.
''You...hate me...'' She panted, her voice more and more weak, ''because...I was...with him...and...you...were not.''
The grasp around her throat tightened as her glazed eyes met Mello's cold, menacing blue orbs.
''You hate me...'' Elena gathered the last wave of strength her body still possessed, and her lips managed to curve into a heartless, inhuman smirk as she gasped. ''Because...you think...he belongs to me...and not...to you.''
In a last raged breath, she let her eyes flutter closed right before Mello's incredulous, mad gaze.
Eventually, once dismay had left his mind, there were only wrath and fury, and that was when Mello truly lost his mind.
''NO! How dared you?! How could you?!'' He squeezed the woman's neck without any restraint. ''He's just a child! He was so innocent! How could you?! You didn't have the right! No. Destroy all your students if you want, for all I care! But not him! Not him! You couldn't... You couldn't! You're a monster! A MONSTER!'' And he shook the limp body so sharply it caused her head to swing back and forth, golden locks swaying around her pallid, hollow face.
All of a sudden, he froze. He opened his arms and watched Cabestan's body as it fell backwards and hit the bed slackly, just like a mere puppet whose owner would have abandoned on the floor.
Without thinking, he raised a hand to his cheeks as he felt something wet and hot flowing down his skin.
Tears.
But those were not tears of sadness, for as the woman had said, he hated Elena Cabestan with all his heart.
Those were tears of rage.
Still, he didn't care. He couldn't avert his eyes from the motionless body that lay in front of him, conscious-less, or perhaps even lifeless.
He rushed towards the stiff, immobile body and shook it with all his strength.
''NO! Don't you dare dying! You won't die! Someone like you doesn't even deserve death! WAKE UP, you worthless bitch! Wake up so I can kill you again, and again, and again! You're gonna pay for what you did, you whore! You—''
He didn't even notice when his limbs gave up, letting his body fall upon hers, nor when he hid his face in the creek of her neck, nor when he cried desperately, soaking the shining, golden curls.
''Fuck, you were right! I hate you! I hate you so much!'' He screamed as he knocked his fist on the mattress, right next to the unconscious woman's ears.
''How could you do that to him?! How could you do that to me?! How could you... How—'' He interrupted himself as his voice went suddenly huskier, quieter.
''He is not yours! He is...he is... He is mine.'' He whispered in her ears.
He couldn't see the bright smile that graced Elena Cabestan's features at that moment.
And when he felt a soft hand smoothing his hair gently, tenderly, as sweet as a mother's embrace, he first sighed in contentment, but soon he realized it was impossible. Unless...
He jerked back in a jolt in time to see the curled-haired woman smiling at him.
''H-How...how...how is that possible?!'' He stammered, his eyes as wide and round as saucers. ''You...you were—''
''Dead?'' Cabestan suggested as she straightened back in one prompt move. ''No. Unconscious? Yes. Though for a few seconds only.''
''B-But how...how is that possible? I almost strangled you, I— You had lost consciousness!''
''Yes.'' She admitted emotionlessly, as if she was merely talking about the weather. ''But you didn't choke me unconscious. In fact,'' she added with a proud grin, ''I did.''
''But that's not possible, I had my hands around your neck and I squeezed, and you—''
''Yes, I felt that, thank you very much.'' She cut him off right away as she applied her hands on her neck where a dark, red bruise had appeared, circling her throat. She winced in what he supposed was hidden pain. ''But this is not the reason why I lost awareness. Actually, I provoked my own loss of awareness.''
''But how?''
''Well, in fact, it's a very dangerous technique. So don't even think about trying it, okay?'' She looked at him severely.
''You're not my mother.'' Mello grumbled.
''Yes,'' she scoffed, ''and I'm glad I'm not!''
The blonde man rolled his eyes. ''So, how did you make it?''
''Alright, I'm going to explain it to you.'' She announced eventually as she started rearranging her clothes and hair as if she'd only been pulled out of a long night sleep.
''I knew if I told you those things, you would soon lose control. But I also had to make sure you wouldn't be so angry that you would kill me. Sure, I love danger, but I love my life more. So in the end, I had to tell you things that were going to weaken you both emotionally and physically. That's why I said I was with Near and he belonged to me— Don't look at me like that!'' She held a hand towards him as he was about to take a step forward.
''This is complete bullshit.'' She declared simply, as if it was the most evident thing in the world, and if you thought about it, it indeed was. ''I never was with him, and he never belonged to me. Everyone would have understood this was nonsense, except you. Because you don't trust Near, you don't trust me, and you don't trust yourself. But most of all, you're afraid.'' She explained as her gaze never left Mello's.
''That's why I knew you would be ready to believe me. And I also knew this would weaken you, because it would hurt you. So as I said that, I knew your grip around my neck would loosen, firstly because of your astonishment, and secondly, because of your hurt. Then you lost control and you cried, and those tears, contrary to what you thought, were tears of sadness, and at this moment, you weren't thinking about me, nor about your anger anymore. That is how I managed to make you stop choking me, so I could take a breath.''
The blonde man was staring at her in awe as she was exposing her tactics so nonchalantly.
''Then I had to make myself lose consciousness. There is a technique, a very dangerous one, that already caused many deaths, especially among children. In France, we call it ''le rêve indien''— the ''Indian dream'' in english, if we translate literally— and it basically consists in hyperventilating for a short while and then, holding your breath. That's what I did when I talked to you, I was panting purposely, and then, when I stopped, I held my breath. After that, I lost consciousness for a few seconds. Some people, when they regain consciousness, have hallucinations. That is not my case, because I am used to that practice.''
''I...I can't believe it.'' He shook his head. ''You planned all this.''
''Yes.''
''But that's...that's very dangerous!''
''Says the man that chokes people to death when he's a bit pissed off!'' Elena snorted.
''Yeah, but that—'' He sighed as he lowered his gaze. ''About that, I'm sorry.''
''No, you're not.'' She contradicted him coldly. ''But it doesn't matter, anyway. If you hadn't tried to strangle me, I couldn't have proved my point.''
''And what's your point?'' Mello asked, arching an eyebrow.
''Well, I already told you. All those things I said were true. I truly listed all the reasons why you hate me. But the reasons could be summed up in one single word.''
''Which is?'' He inquired, his voice filled with both irritation and weariness.
In response, Elena Cabestan offered him the most sneaky grin he had ever seen.
''You already know it, Mello,'' she said, clearly amused. ''There is a word for that feeling. It's called...''
She interrupted herself, as if enjoying the effect she was producing on Mello's disturbed thoughts, before she finished her sentence, her voice malicious and defiant.
''Jealousy.''
''Hey, Mello.''
''What now?''
''I want to make another deal with you.''
The mafioso rotated his head to glare at the golden-haired woman who was still lying on her miserable bed.
''I'm tired of your deals, Cabestan.''
''I know, but you must admit the last times we made a deal, it worked out kinda well for you...''
Mello kept quiet for a while, before he reached out to grab a chocolate bar which he immediately brought to his mouth.
Croc.
Elena puffed in annoyance, wondering if the blonde man weren't doing that on purpose, knowing the noise infuriated her more than anything.
''Fine. What do you offer?'' He muttered.
The lawyer smiled warmly. ''I know you're furious because I discovered you were jealous of me, just because of my relationship with Near— which is nonexistent.''
As she met Mello's gleaming eyes, she sighed deeply.
''Don't tire yourself denying it, I know it. That would be a loss of time, and I've the feeling we wasted enough time already. I know you're feeling jealousy, and that can mean only one thing: you care for Near, more than you would care for an enemy, and even more than you would care for a friend. Besides, we both know no one would care this way for a rival, and you never had something akin to friendship with Near. So this only leaves us one possibility.''
''Cabestan.'' Mello warned her with a throaty growl. ''I don't like where this is going...''
''I bet you don't!'' The french woman chuckled joylessly. ''But that doesn't change the truth. Though, for your pride and confort, I won't say the words you're so afraid of. You can already thank me for that. Any psychologist would have forced you into saying it just to make you accept it. The thing is I'm no psychologist and I'm sure you already accepted those feelings, you just never risked yourself to put words on it, am I right?''
In response, Mello lowered his gaze, pursing his thin lips together.
''Okay,'' Cabestan sighed, ''I'll take this as a yes. Moreover, you must know there is no shame in holding those kind of feelings towards a boy. No matter where you were raised, nor how you've been educated, just know that love doesn't depend on the country you live in, nor the beliefs you've been taught. Love is no law, love is fatality and you cannot fight it.''
She observed carefully as the blonde slowly raised his head, causing blue, glowing eyes to meet bright brown.
''Plus, I am not here to judge you. As you may have noticed, I myself have some sexual tendencies that might not be considered as acceptable by many people. But I don't care. And you shouldn't either.''
''Why...why are you telling me all this?'' Mello asked eventually, his voice slightly wavering.
''I know I'm not your mother, Mello. But you've been raised in an orphanage, and I guess you've got no one to tell you how love works. No family, no friends. So that's what I'm trying to do right now. I'm playing both the sister's role and the friend's.''
Mello nodded almost imperceptibly.
''The only thing you have to know is this: it's okay to fall in love with a boy. It's okay to fall for your enemy. Many people did before you, and many people will after you.''
''But I hate him...'' His voice was a bare whisper.
''I know, Mello.'' She smiled sadly. ''There is a fine line separating love from hate, and all you have to do is cross it.''
''B-But...I can't! I don't—'' He burst out as he threw his favorite snack on the table violently. ''I don't know! I don't know what to do! I don't know what to think! I don't know what's happening to me! What's wrong with me?! Something is wrong with me! It must be! I'm going insane... I'm insane! Oh God! I'm fucking insane!'' His voice broke as he faced the older woman, spreading his arms in defeat.
''It was so easy...'' He murmured. ''It's so easier to hate him...''
''Nothing is wrong with you, Mello. And you're certainly not insane.'' Elena's voice soothed him. ''Hate is a very easy emotion to express, while love is far more complex. But it's easier than you think. All you have to do is let go. And for that, you have to make him understand what you truly feel.''
''But...I don't even know what he feels!'' He kicked the table with his foot. ''Argh! I don't even know why I'm bothering myself with this bullshit, anyway! It's useless.''
''Not if you have a way to prove how he really feels about you.'' She stated mysteriously, catching the man's full attention at the same time.
''But...how can we do that?'' He questioned incredulously.
The criminologist smirked eerily.
''What do you say if I give you the proof that he's just as jealous as you are?''
Mello blinked at her.
''B-But Near isn't— Near doesn't care, he—''
''No, no.'' Cabestan shook her head impatiently. ''Near is human, remember. And if he is human, he has emotions. If he can feel, he can feel jealousy. And if he feels jealousy, then it means he holds more than friendly feelings towards you.''
Mello furrowed his eyebrows in a skeptical way. ''Right. But how do you plan to prove his jealousy?''
''That's the most simple. All we have to do is to apply the same strategy I used on you.'' She winked at him. ''Without the unconscious part, of course!''
He smirked in response as he made his way towards his computer desk and sat in front of the black screen, switching it on.
''Right, so I will call Near, and...'' He glanced above his shoulder, waiting for Elena to expose her full and complete strategy.
The french woman's lips curled up into a smirk that matched Mello's perfectly as she declared deviously.
''And you will tell him you're having a romantic relationship with me.''
Author's Note:
Mello's conflicted feelings, Elena's strange tactics, the mystery of Elena's past with Kira... Well, that was a L (Ahah!) of a chapter! I liked writing that one very much, I feel like that's the best chapter I've written so far!
Anyway, thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.
I'll tell you that much more is coming in the next chapter...
Next chapter: Mello and Elena set a trap for Near, pushing the latter to his very limits...
A special thanks to Caly and Yuuri Nikiforov for their kind reviews, it was more than appreciated! Thank you so much guys!
To Caly: Merci encore pour ton soutien, ça fait plaisir de voir que certaines personnes sont attachées à cette fanfiction. Je suis heureuse que tu partages ma vision des personnages de Mello et Near, j'avoue que pour moi, c'est évident, ils ne pouvaient voir la vérité en face par eux-mêmes (d'où la présence d'Elena Cabestan dont les lecteurs, je l'espère, sauront apprécier l'utilité). Merci encore pour tous ces compliments, ça fait toujours autant chaud au coeur !
To Yuuri Nikiforov: Thank you for your kindness, but I assure you there are people who are much more gifted than myself! ;)
Bye bye, humans !
Please leave a review to tell me what you think about how the plot's going!
C.