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Chapter 13- Nightmares and Reality.
"Miss her?" A familiar voice droned into Sam's ear as a hand swept out and pulled the empty bar chair next to him back.
A body filled the seat, a hand setting a beer down on the counter as Saul got comfortable.
"Who?" Sam asked looking up over his shoulder to face his current boss.
He was the mark, the guy Sam was working. And he was a complete ass.
"Your girl?" Saul wiggled his eyebrows for good measure as he leaned onto the bar counter and got comfortable when Sam really just wished that the guy would go away. He really wasn't in the mood for the creep, and he wasn't in the mood for company.
"Bet she's blonde right?" Saul added and an image flashed through Sam's mind. It was definitely not of a blonde woman.
"She around, or did she skip out when you got the bangles?". Saul just wouldn't give it a rest.
Sam's cover identity had just been let out of jail on parole, hence the reason Saul made a reference to silver bangles.
"She's around". And Sam had to give him something. He couldn't afford to raise suspicion about himself now.
"So, what's her deal?". Saul was so totally into the conversation, it was only the second one they'd ever had so it was surprising.
"It's uh, complicated". Sam responded hoping to hell that his face was a mask of nothing right now.
"Complicated? What, she married? We can always un-complicate it".
Sam knew that he had to slam the breaks on this conversation and soon, because Saul looked like he was itching for an excuse to create mayhem.
"No, different backgrounds" Sam used that as an excuse and then mentally kicked himself in the ass for even referring to Andy as the person occupying his mind. Saul caught him when he let his guard down and that was only asking for trouble.
"Daddy's little rich girl? Those are the ones you stay away from Sammy, trust me. Those ones eat you up alive and then throw you to the dogs. Guys like us don't belong with girls like that". Saul patted Sam's shoulder and rose to his feet.
"Hey Agnes, give Sammy another one on me" Saul yelled over the din of the bar before walking away shaking his head. At least Sam's answer's had fueled Saul's need to know.
Maybe thinking about the near miss of kissing Andy wasn't such a bad thing after all, it got his boss' attention so maybe, just maybe he was on the right track.
...
Sam spent another nine days getting done what needed to be done in order to go home.
After his conversation with Saul at the bar Sam gained some trust and was pulled in closer than he had been before.
He'd met with Jerry last night at a bar and slipped him a note saying that the shipment was postponed because it was in a cargo container at the docks and hadn't been cleared by customs yet but they were a go for today because everything had been cleared and sorted out.
Jerry had come into the bar looking like he was trashed and Sam figured it was because they were running over the ten day mark and he hadn't been in contact with them for seven of the last nine days.
Jerry had followed some woman out the door after Sam scribbled a note on a napkin and left it under his glass so he assumed that he was okay and that they would raid the shipment today.
He just didn't know when.
Would it be when they went to get it, or while they were in transit?
He actually didn't even really care, he just wanted it to be over so that he could go home.
At three am Sam hitched the cargo trailer and started the engine before pulling out of the collection area. No blue and red lights and no sirens meant that they wouldn't be raiding the pickup.
He hit the highway and answered his burner phone just like Saul had instructed him to and then he was given direction on where to go.
Three cars were following the truck, Saul's way of keeping eyes on his money.
An hour into the journey after following Saul's direction Sam saw the blue and red lights light the highway up ahead.
They had lanes across both directions closed off and he knew that if he checked his rear view mirror he'd find them there too.
Three hours later he was released from holding after giving Jerry and Callaghan his statement and running through debriefing.
He'd been forced to stop at the road block and hauled out of the truck with everyone else so he was playing along and trying to keep it as believable as possible.
After stopping in the locker room to grab his keys Sam headed for the side door of the barn with enthusiasm. He was ready to have a hot shower and sleep in his own bed for twelve hours before surfacing in the world as Sam Swarek again.
...
Oliver dropped Sam off at home, he was leaning against a cruiser when Sam left the barn.
It was just after time for Bailey to start school and he was kind of disappointed that he'd miss surprising her before she left. At least she'd get a surprise when she came home, or he could just go and pick her up himself.
Sam waved Oliver a thanks as he drove off and Sam was left on the pavement looking up at his house.
Sam made it up the stairs and inside before he found a reason to stay outside on the pavement all day. The house was quiet, no sounds audible at all. Not even from the TV.
Sam dropped his bag next to the door and shook off his jacket, it smelled like smoke and stale beer.
Sam hit the stairs, the shower calling his name as he neared the space.
He just wished that there had been someone home when he got here, because it felt really empty...
Sam felt better after the hot shower and change of clothes, he had even started dreaming about it the last few nights.
Stepping out into the hallway, Sam smelled coffee and toast and knew that Andy was back or up. He hadn't checked if she'd gone back to bed so he didn't even really know if she was here or out ... Slow down! His mind screamed as he got a little ahead of himself.
"Hi" Andy's voice made him jump as she spoke from somewhere behind him. She was sitting on the couch with the TV turned off, sipping on coffee of her own.
"I made you breakfast" she added.
"How'd you know I was here?" Sam had no idea how she did it, but she always seemed to sense when he was around.
Andy's gaze shuffled across the room and Sam followed it to his bag. Of course, even he should have guessed that.
Sam dished up breakfast for himself and poured coffee, his stomach grumbling at the delicious smells of eggs, fried tomato, fried banana and toast.
"So, you're back now? Is it over?" Andy asked when she slid up into the kitchen and set her cup down in the sink.
Sam nodded, only because he hated when people spoke with a mouth full of food. He wasn't about to do the same thing.
Andy smiled his way and Sam was sure that there was a flicker in her eyes. Her hand moved up and her fingers fiddled with the end of her braid, she did that often and he didn't think that she even knew it.
"I have debriefing tomorrow because it's a high profile case, but after that it'll be over".
Andy smiled, sadly and then just turned away to rinse her coffee cup out.
She disappeared after that, and Sam gave up trying to eat.
There was absolutely nothing wrong with the food, it was just the flash of reality staring him in the face that made his appetite diminish.
She was bound to want to leave, and soon because he asked her to stay until he got back. And now, here he was, so time was up and he just didn't like the idea of her leaving.
Sam looked up and found Andy watching him with her eyes narrowed and her head tilted to the side. She was trying to get a read on him and what was going through his mind. There was no way that he was letting that happen, so he wiped his mind clean and stared straight back at her.
Wordlessly she stepped forwards and set his medical insurance card and ID down. Along with those was his ATM card, a small amount of change and about seven receipts; probably what she had purchased while he had been gone.
Her eyes swooped over to the counter and before he could thank her for staying or thank her for taking good care of Bailey she was gone again.
Sam followed her upstairs and found her rummaging around in her room, or Bailey's room, her hands folding items of clothing and packing them into two piles.
She was getting ready to leave.
Sam leaned against the door frame and watched her without saying a single word because even in his own mind asking her to stay freaked him out.
It wasn't plausible, or do-able or even normal.
Sam watched her for a while before leaving her to do whatever it was that she had to do.
He took a seat on the couch and waited for the goodbye that was destined to happen from the first time he set eyes on her when she knocked into him in the street.
...
That smell...
It was like steak marinated in syrup and rosemary...
Sam felt a hand trace its way across his fingers, the soft skin a familiar warmth to his hand.
Cracking an eyelid open Sam found Bailey on the couch next to him in her PJ's her fingers playing with his hand.
"I missed you" she said so quietly that Sam barely heard her. Sam didn't want to give her a fright, so he wiggled his fingers in her hand and she looked up. Seeing his eyes open made her launch herself at him, a full blown dimpled grin lighting her face up.
"You're awake" she giggled into his ear.
Great, he'd been waiting for Andy to leave and had fallen asleep on the couch instead. Now he'd probably be left to explain...
"Hot chocolate's ready" Andy's voice sounded behind him telling him that she was in the kitchen.
Wow, was it that late? Had he seriously slept the entire day gone?
But she was still here... Which didn't really make sense.
She appeared a second later and paused for a second before carrying Bailey's hot chocolate over.
He had been really tired, so if she had tried to wake him maybe he didn't hear her? She wasn't irresponsible enough to just leave him passed out on the couch.
Bailey shifted and took her hot chocolate with a sweet 'thank you' while Sam shifted around and tried to get his bearings.
Andy disappeared again, but he guessed that it was back into the kitchen.
Ten minutes, and five make believe stories of where he had been and what he'd been doing later, Sam ushered Bailey to bed when her eyes started drooping.
She went looking for Andy and Sam watched as Bailey was given a giant hug and a kiss against her head before Bailey stumbled up the stairs.
"One more day?" Sam asked knowing that he was pushing his luck, but maybe he'd be able to scrounge up one more excuse to get her to stay.
Andy nodded and then looked towards the microwave. "You're dinner..." She let it hang.
Sam heard his name called from upstairs, Bailey waiting for him to tuck her in. She had probably missed that too.
Sam went up hoping that Andy would still be downstairs when he returned.
After tucking Bailey in, Sam noticed that her bedroom door was closed so Andy had decided that she needed to sleep. Any conversation that they may have would wait until tomorrow.
Sam ate and then went to bed although he ended up staring at the ceiling more than sleeping.
His mind was wide awake, even though his body was still tired.
He read 11:45 on his alarm clock and knew that it would be a long night...
...
"Aaaannndddyyy".
The loud scream ripped through Sam's dream and he was instantly awake.
Bailey was having a nightmare and her scream chilled him to the bone. She was shifting around and her hands were clenched into fists. Just as Sam reached out to touch her his bedroom door flew open and Andy was there.
She didn't even bother with knocking first, but after hearing Bailey scream Sam couldn't really blame her.
"Bailey, sweetie you need to wake up" Andy knelt down next to Bailey's side of the bed and slowly reached out for her hand. Lifting her tiny scrunched up fist into her own hand Andy began to rub it soothingly. "It's okay, I'm here".
Sam leaned up onto an elbow and watched motionless as Andy began to rouse Bailey.
When Bailey's eyes opened she looked around the room confused until the memory of her nightmare surfaced and she suddenly lunged at Andy.
She started crying too.
"You okay?" Sam got up and moved around the bed to where they were crouched on the other side. Sam sat down and ran a hand over Bailey's hair trying to draw her attention so that Andy could go back to bed.
"I want Andy" Bailey's words sliced through Sam. It was the first time since she'd been here that she wanted someone other than him.
Andy struggled but finally managed to stand up still holding onto Bailey and Sam was left to watch them walk out of his bedroom as Andy soothed Bailey's falling tears.
They were in serious trouble if Bailey wanted Andy after a nightmare. That told Sam one thing- she too wasn't quite ready to let Andy go. She'd fallen in love with Andy and had latched onto her so tightly that when Andy left, she'd be devastated.
****Thanks for reading!
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Jelly Bean Jenna©