Chapter 13:
Strong Enough
Sirius POV:
Anwen and I were both getting excited about the trip. I hadn't been to Italy in years, and Anwen hadn't ever been, so she was, well, more excited than usual. That's why I was so surprised when Remus walked into my room the night before we were to leave, Anwen's last night of the last play for the summer season. I was getting ready to take her to the cast party, when Moony knocked on the door.
"Moony, what's wrong?" I asked when I saw his face.
"Sirius, I need you to come with me. Mr. and Mrs. Potter have contracted Dragon Pox. Their nephew, the little boy who was sick at the wedding, had infected them. He's better now, but James' parents have gotten quite ill. James can't handle them alone, and he doesn't know how much immunity Lily would have, since she was Muggle born." Dragon Pox was a common childhood illness in the Wizarding world. Most kids had it by the time that they were seven or eight, and other than itching like crazy, there were few side effects. I remember when I had it, I was five and Kreacher made these awful milk of young spider baths. The problem is that as you age, you loose the immunity that you have built up. If you are reinfected it can be downright dangerous. James' parents were not young.
"Um, I am supposed to get Anwen in another hour. I won't let her walk home on her own..." we are supposed to leave tomorrow for Italy...but I can't leave James if he needs help...
"We can send Lily, and then I think that they should stay here. You and I will be fine, we both had it as kids, but I don't know about either of them. We should keep them as far away as we can, just to be safe," he explained.
"All right, let's go, we can go to Lily first, and then over to the main house," I suggested and he agreed.
We disapparated from the lounge and were at the front door of the guest house in moments. Lily agreed that she would go and get Anwen, and take her things to sleep there. Her face gave away her concern. We promised that someone would bring news to the house when there was some.
Anwen POV:
When I left the theater, I was surprised to see Lily there. I knew that something was wrong, the way that her face was forced into a smile.
"Lily, please just tell me that Sirius is okay," I asked her, concerned at why she was here.
"Anwen, he's fine. James' parents have taken sick, and Sirius went to help him care for them," she was trying to stay calm, but I could hear the concern in her voice.
"Why aren't you there?" I asked her.
"I'll tell you once we are home. Your house is close right, I need to walk, I'm too upset to...us home," she explained.
"Yeah, it's only a few blocks. Come on," we walked away from the people and the theater, and we tried to make light conversation, but it kept coming back to Sirius or James and we finally just decided to let it go, and walk in silence. No sooner than I had opened the door and let us in, did she start telling me everything.
"James parents have come down with Dragon Pox. His cousin, Balthazar, was sick with them at the wedding. Apparently they had let the child lie down in their bed, before anyone knew what he was sick with," she explained. She told me about Dragon Pox, since I knew nothing about them. "It's bad, James was really worried about them. He, Sirius and Remus are taking care of them right now, but it's a full moon soon, and ..." she just started sobbing. We sat on the couch, I held her as she cried.
"Why aren't we there? I am sure that we could help," I ventured.
"Anwen, we were Muggle born, we never had them. If we were to get sick, it could be very dangerous for us too," her eyes looked so heartbroken. She knew that her love needed her, and there was nothing that she could do. We stayed there, holding onto each other, for hours. Just as dawn was breaking I heard a noise out the back door. Lily had finally fallen asleep, so I crept from the room. I saw Sirius in the yard, I flung the door open and went to run to him.
"Anwen, no. You can't come near me. I can't risk infecting you," he was whispering, but there was a sternness to his voice that scared me. I stopped in my tracks. I was on the small back decking, he was near the peach tree. His face was held taught.
"Sirius, how bad is it?"
"Bad. His parents are weak, and the fever hasn't broken. There is a doctor from St. Mungo's there now, but they are too sick to move to the hospital. I'm afraid..." his voice caught in his throat, and I could see that his emotions were getting the best of him. He loved the Potter's like they were his own family. The certainly loved him like he was there son, more so than his parents ever did. My heart broke for him.
"Oh, poor James. How is he holding up?"
"He's just trying to make them comfortable, and hoping for the best. Anwen, I am so sorry. We were supposed to leave today, and ..."
"No, I understand. This is far more important. Sirius...I'm so sorry," tears were falling down my face, and I could see how distraught he was. All I wanted to do was run and hold him, but I knew that I couldn't. We stood there, I was silently crying, both of us wanting the one thing that we couldn't do.
"I should get back, I'll have James come see Lily if he can. Someone will come with news when we have it. Take care of her, okay; and take care of yourself...love you," he added, sounding so weak.
"Love you too, be safe," I choked out. I watched as he went into the garage, and disapparated from there. I fell to the deck, sobs racking over me. I have to let them out before I go in, Lily will need me to be strong. I gained my composure, and went back into the kitchen. I put the kettle on, before walking into the lounge. Lily was stirring, and I waited until she saw me before I opened my mouth. The look on my face must have said it all.
"Oh, my poor James," she said, before tears over took her.
Mr. Potter died that night, Mrs. Potter followed her husband by dawn the next day. The boys stayed at the manor, disinfecting the house and themselves before they would come to see us. The reunion between Lily and James was heart wrenching, and Sirius and I left them alone. When they were strong enough, they would head back to their house, but for right now, they just needed each other. Sirius and I sat on the porch swing for the longest time, not saying anything. Remus had taken off, we didn't know where he was or who he was with, but he simply said that he couldn't handle being here, with all of us.
It felt like too much, Remus father's death, the end of the school year, Mr. Black's death, the wedding and now James parent's illness and deaths. My head was spinning and my gut was stretched to it's limit. I felt like I was on a carnival ride, that kept going faster and I couldn't see where it was going next, or when it might end. The unsettled feeling that I had carried with me into the summer now overwhelmed me, and I just wanted to make it stop. I didn't want to feel like this anymore. I didn't want to wonder when the other shoe was going to drop. My breathing had sped up, like my body was running away from something, even though I was sitting still, but everything seemed to whirl around. The world had stopped making sense and it was like there was nothing to grab onto. Somewhere in all of this I started to sob, hysterically, and my breathing was completely erratic. My heart was racing in my chest. My head hurt, and my eyes burned, and I could hear my name being called but I couldn't figure out where the sound was coming from. It was all a blur and I felt like I was falling, and it was getting cold and dark.
Then it stopped.
There were rough hands on my face, and I was staring into those eyes, the ones that look like an overcast sky. He was telling me to breathe, "In and out, slowly now, come on, come back to me," my eyes had shut, and the darkness was soothing. "Winnie, little one, open your eyes. I need you to look at me," I complied. The cloudy sky was back, and he was stroking my cheeks with his thumbs. "Anwen, love, say something. Please," he begged.
"Sirius..." I whispered.
"Yes love, shh, I'm here. Calm down. It's okay," I eased myself into him, his arms wrapped around me and he continued to whisper in my ear. I breathed slowly, listening to his heart, his breath, and I ground myself to it. This was the only thing left that was real. I could learn to live with everything else, as long as I could stay safely here, as long as I had him.
We never made it to Italy.
I wouldn't let Sirius take me any father than the Muggle station. I couldn't bear the idea of him being on the platform, watching him seem to get smaller the train pulled away. I made him leave me, just before I went through the wall between platforms nine and ten. I had cried for the last few days on and off. Everyone was sad, Mr. and Mrs. Potter's deaths had hit us all very hard, and their funerals were so difficult to get through.
I had been brave while I was with him, but now, alone on the train, I was crying again. My body felt like it had been ripped in two. The urge to just close my eyes, and allow myself to get lost in my sadness was overwhelming. If I let the darkness overtake me, if I gave in, maybe it wouldn't hurt so much. My heart and my mind battled for control, and I wasn't sure which one would win most of the time.
I fingered the charms on my bracelet, remembering each of the things that they represented.
My Twelfth birthday, the beginning of the bracelet, with the little broom and the heart for the "voice of an angel". I was so excited. It was a gift from my best friend. In that moment, I had never felt so much love from anyone in my life.
The golden snitch from the first Quidditch match that we won as team mates.
The ballet slipper from my solo, that silly, stupid, toe breaker of a routine.
The Big Ben, from our touring that first summer holiday together, when I showed him the boot sales. He still loves to go to them, I wonder if he will go without me while I'm at school?
The star for my thirteenth birthday, which is indeed a diamond on there. Stupid stinky rich diamond buying guy.
My little Christmas Tree, from that magical – quite literally given the tree – Christmas in our flat. That was the best Christmas I had ever had.
My falcon, I didn't even realize that he had put it on there. It was there for two whole days. I can be so dense sometimes.
The little comedy and tragedy faces. Opening night, my first summer in company. It was only weeks before...how fast that summer turned around.
The waltzing couple, the Yule Ball. Going with him seemed like such a lame idea at the time, but it turned out so well. It was a beautiful night...sigh. Come on, you said that you were going to forget.
The open book, for essentially skipping my fourth year. I went from third year exams to fifth. I was going back this year as a full sixth year student.
The little house, for our little house. We had finally found this the day after James and Lily's wedding. He had been looking for something to remember our home with, and he was so happy when we finally found this. I own part of a house, it seems so strange, but it's my home.
And my Owl. It's in honor of my OWL's, all of them. At least I was one year closer to finishing.
Break out of it girl. This is silly, you still have friends, and you will play Quidditch again. Hey, you might even get to date a little since Mr. Overprotective won't be here to scare them off. Maybe? Let's find the bright side here. I took a deep breath, and wiped my face off. My head was winning this time. With that, the door to the compartment began to open. Well, it's a good thing you got a hold of yourself there girlie. It was Katie.
"Anwen, omigod, I am so excited to see you. How was your summer? What did you do? Did you go to James and Lily's wedding, how was it? Was she beautiful?" Okay, I now get why Sirius is sometimes freaked out by talking to me.
"Katie, stop, breathe," I laughed at her. Those are the same words Sirius uses with me. "My summer was good. I worked most of the summer. I did go to James and Lily's wedding, and it was beautiful. I have some pictures, would you like to see?"
"Yes, that would be great," she beamed back at me. As I was reaching in my bag to get the album, the door opened again, and Corinne walked in, along with a younger girl in tow.
"Hey guys, how was your summer? This is my little sister, Bette," we greeted the young girl, and she sat down with us. I got the album out, and we talked all about the wedding. I paused at the picture of James and Lily with his parents. It was probably the last picture that they had taken. I took a deep breath and went on. They oohed and aahed at Lily and her dress, and said how handsome James looked. They made dreamy faces at Sirius in his dress robes. What is it about him that makes girls drool at his mere sight? I rolled my eyes at them. In the back of the book, there was a picture of Sirius and I dancing. I forgot that it was there. We were looking at each other, his right hand on my back, mine on his face, our left hands clasped together and held high. He spun and twirled me around the floor.
"Anwen, your dress is beautiful, you look almost as bonny as Lily," Katie cooed. I told them about my how I got my dress, and they laughed, that I was the only person they knew who could find something that someone wanted to throw out, and turn it into something lovely. I thanked them for their kind words.
"Anwen, you are so lucky. The way that he looks at you. He is so in love with you. You have to be dating him now," Katie said, staring at the picture. The rest of the girls were nodding their heads.
"Nope. No dating. It's really not like that. He does love me, but he's not in love with me," I said, calmly. They all looked at me like I was crazy. I shrugged and shook my head. I'm not sure that I get it either anymore girls.
We talked about what they all did over the summer, and I asked Bette which house she wanted to be in, "Gryffindor of course" was her answer. I sat back, and listened to them for a while, but my mind kept wandering. The door to the compartment opened again, it was Ian.
"Hey spitfire," He used the nickname James had given me my first year on the team. "Glad to see you back. Ready for some hard work, we have many people to replace on the team this year?" Don't I know it.
"You bet. Look, I wanted to talk with you about it. I was thinking that I might want to try out for Seeker this year, since Laura has graduated. Is that okay with you?" I asked him.
"Anwen, you were awesome when you filled in, I think you would be great. You'll have to try out, but honestly, I doubt that there is anyone better. We will need two chasers and two beaters though then. Keep your ears open, and let me know if there is anyone who you think would be good, okay. Oh, and do you think that maybe you could get some help from a certain flying whiz, if you get the spot?" he said, lifting an eyebrow.
"I think I can arrange that. His wife and I go way back," I chuckled back, and we were both laughing.
"Hey, I'll see you at dinner okay. Bye girls," and with that, Ian was gone.
I stared blankly out the windows for a while, and then I told the girls that I needed to go and take a walk. I left the compartment and started down the train. I saw other people that I knew, and several of them asked me about my summer. I saw Matthew quickly, and then he scurried back into a cabin. Jerk.
I walked down a few more cars, and then something made my head pop up. It felt like I had been hit with a thousand sharp pins. I scanned the hall of the car quickly, and my eyes came to rest on a pair of pale gray eyes. There was familiarity in them, but something else that made me shiver. I stood there, locked into the gaze of Regulus Black for what seemed like ages. Neither one of us moving, I hadn't even taken in a breath. I finally sucked in air, but kept my gaze on him. There were several younger students in the hallway, and something in me gave me pause for their safety. I reached into my pocket to grab my wand, and held it silently at my side. Your first course has to be to protect the rest of them.
The train shifted suddenly, and several of the other students lost their footing. The trance was broken, and Regulus turned and exited out the far end of the car.
My skin was cold, and I could feel my heart racing. I put my wand away, and tried to calm myself, but it was more difficult than I had imagined. What is with him? He barely knows me, and Sirius isn't around anymore, so I really haven't done anything to him.
I went back to the car with my classmates, and we got into our robes. The ride up to the castle was filled with chattering and laughter, but as hard as I tried, I couldn't shake the coldness that lingered from my run in with Regulus.
During the feast, I sat on the side of the table where I couldn't make eye contact with the Slytherin table. I didn't want to have any further incident with them today. When the festivities were done, and we were about to leave the to go to the tower, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I jumped at the pressure of it.
"Miss Hodgson, are you all right?" a familiar voice said to me. I turned and saw Professor McGonagall standing there.
"Yes Ma'am, just a little jumpy I guess," I replied.
"Oh, of course. There are two things that I wanted to ask you. First, will you be staying in the fifth year dormitory, or would you like to move up to the sixth?" I hadn't given this any thought, I didn't even know I could change dorms.
"Um, I hadn't really thought about it. I suppose that I would like to stay where I am. I have my friends there," I answered honestly.
"Yes, yes, very well then. Furthermore, I was wondering if you would have the time to work on some lessons with me privately this year. We don't teach much of human Transfiguration at school, it's just beyond most students abilities, but you are not most students young lady. I think that you would be capable of such magic."
"Professor, I am honored that you think that I could do it. Yes, I will have extra time this year, since I don't have to keep my best friend out of detention," I made the obvious joke. We both knew I was referring to Sirius and his rather persistent and permanent home in detention.
"No, I suppose you are right. All right then, we will start next week. Oh, and your Runes OWL score was quite impressive. The highest the school has ever seen," she said, with a nod of understanding in her face.
"Really? I didn't realize that," I said to her, sounding somewhat dumfounded.
"Really, congratulations dear. Have a good night Miss Hodgson, and try to enjoy school this year?"
"I will ma'am. Thank you," I turned and went upstairs.
My things were in the fifth year dorm, awaiting me, and I set about to unpacking. When I opened it, it became obvious that Sirius had repacked my trunk. He sent the over sized shirt from his uniform back with me, with a note attached reminding me to "cover up" if I wore it again. A new book, by a Muggle author that I had started reading over the summer was also included, and at the bottom, the afghan from the couch in the lounge. There was also a large box of chocolates, which I opened and dug in while I wrapped the afghan around myself, and struggled to keep from crying. You have to have fun this year, you have to get over it. It's only a few weeks until the first Hogsmeade weekend, then there will be Quidditch and he has promised to come for both things. Calm yourself down, and try to enjoy things.
Katie and Corinne came back in, and they were laughing loudly. The sound was infectious. We talked for a few more minutes, and then there was a rapping at the window. Katie opened it, and Midnight flew in, and dropped a small package and a letter on my bed. I gave her a treat, and sent her back out the window. I opened the letter, and smiled at what it said:
Winnie love -
Just so you don't get homesick. The house is already quiet without
you. I will see you soon, please remember to smile and study hard.
Always,
Sirius
I opened the small package. It was a framed picture of the two of us, sitting on the swing in the front of our house. I was tousling his hair and he was making a silly face at me, we were laughing greatly. I showed the rest of the girls, and they all were laughing at us.
"I don't know, I still think that there is something going on there," Katie said, grabbing her pajamas and starting to get changed.
"Katie I swear, there is nothing. Come on, let's get ready for bed," I grabbed the over sized shirt, and started changing.
Once classes started again, there was less time for me to feel lonely. It took a while for me to get my schedule organized. There was no way that I could take twelve classes and my private lessons with McGonagall. We sat for a good fifteen minutes before we decided that I should take Defense, Transfiguration, Charms, Potions, Ancient Runes, Arithmancy and Herbology. I enjoyed both Care of Magical Creatures and Astronomy; but Creatures was at the same time as Ancient Runes, which I had done exceptionally well at; and the lab for Astronomy made it difficult to study for my other classes. I didn't feel the need to take the Muggle Studies class, being a Muggle and all. I had only taken the Divination exam to appease Professor McGonagall's curiosity, and I was shocked that I had done well. I had faked all the answers, how I passed was beyond me. I would not want it as a NEWT. We had a new Divination Professor, and this upset her to no end. Not sure I could take a whole class with her, she's a little...odd. I had Tuesday and Thursday afternoons free, so Professor McGonagall and I could meet to do my special lessons. I ordered the few books that I still needed from Flourish and Blotts, and then set about to filling my mind with my studies, so that my heart didn't have time to take over.
Quidditch tryouts went well. I flew circles around the other three people who wanted to be Seeker. A third year named Bree would be a good addition to the Chaser line up, she would be able to work well with Cole, who filled in when James was in detention, and Beatrice. A fourth and fifth year set of brother, Jasper and Eli Wythe were great as Beaters, it was almost like they had some sort of sense of where the other was. I really felt great about the team. I owled Sirius when the list was posted. I also wrote to James to ask him for some help, and he agree to meet with me the first Hogsmeade weekend. We could meet for lunch, with Lily of course, then go and get me some proper seeker gloves, and come back to the pitch and work on my skills.
Studies were hard, but I was really able to throw myself into them this year. I didn't really know any of the sixth year students, so I studied by myself most of the time. School was definitely easier without the distractions. My work with Professor McGonagall was the best of it all. She was teaching me so much, and I was being pushed harder than I ever had. The only downside were my two classes with Matthew and three with Regulus. That boy just creeps me out!
One afternoon, I had gone down to the lake to study. It was a beautiful day, early in October, and it was quiet here. I liked to do my spell work for my private lessons alone, away from everyone else. I was sitting by the edge of the lake, working on changing the length of my fingers. It wasn't just making them pretty, like I did when I made a glamor as my nail polish, I was changing the structure of my hand. I felt something move behind me, so I froze, listening intently. More movement. My fingers wound tightly around my wand and I cast the spell in my mind, and waited.
Then a large, black dog lumbered over, and plopped itself down next to my leg and licked my face.
"Gosh, I didn't know that Hogwarts was letting in ill tempered mongrels now. You really should bathe more often, you stink Padfoot. Oh, and don't ever lick me again," I said, still looking forward, wiping my face off. Good job, play it cool.
"You would think that I would deserve a better greeting than that. Ill tempered mongrel. I'll have you know that James thinks my temperament is much better as a dog than as a human," Sirius said back, his voice filled with mock anger.
I crawled over and climbed between his legs, facing him, looking him square in the eyes and said: "I have missed you more than you could ever know," and hugged him tightly. His arms wrapped around me and held me there. So much for cool.
"That's more like it." He was still hugging me when he asked, "What have I told you about coming out here alone? You really need to think about your safety." He sounded like an old man.
I pulled away from him, dropped my arms and sighed, "Sirius, I am still on campus, and when I heard you, I put up a shield charm. It wasn't until I saw it was you that I dropped it. Honestly, I am fine here, Hogwarts is the safest place on the earth. Hey, what are you doing here?" he twisted me around, and settled me between his legs, sitting sideways.
"I had a meeting with Professor Dumbledore, it's that stuff he has me working on. I asked if I could stick around for a while when we were finished. He agreed," Sirius let me know. Yeah!
"So, how long are you here for?" Don't get your hopes up, don't get your hopes up.
"I figured that I would stay and have dinner with you. Remus is over with James and Lily. Neither of us cook very well, I miss having you at home," he confided.
"Glad to know that's what you miss about me," I said, filled with mock frustration. He never had gotten the hang of household spells.
"Okay, I miss your bright smile in the morning, and even the way that awful coffee smells when you make it. I miss the way your laughter rings in the house like a bell. I miss the way you would curl up when you were reading at night, and how you sing when you do the dishes, and the way you always would say goodnight," my throat felt tight and again, my eyes were burning. I couldn't say anything, "I miss the way that you make our house feel. It's not home when you are gone," his voice was very quiet. I couldn't find words to respond, so I just sat there looking at him.
An eternity passed before either of us said anything. I finally found my voice, and I needed to change the subject. "Um, can you tell me anything about these things you are doing for Dumbledore?"
"Well, can't tell you what, but I can show you something he taught me. Watch this," he pulled his wand from his back pocket, and gave it a flick. From the end erupted with a bluish white light, that sailed away from him and then suddenly, hit the ground on all fours. The thing turned and looked at me, it was a great white dog, exactly like his Animagus form. I stared at it for the longest time in amazement. Then it opened it's big dog mouth and said:
"Winnie, you should close your mouth before something flies in," it said in Sirius' voice, and then it laughed and disappeared. My mouth was still hanging open, when I turned to look at him. He put a finger under my chin and closed my mouth.
"Winnie love, your look is priceless," his bark like laughter filled the air around us.
"When did you learn to do a full Patronus Charm? How in all the sugared spaghetti pops did you make it talk like that?" I was in shock. Sirius was excellent at Charms, but that was, wow.
"Sugared spaghetti pops? Honestly, that may be one of the grossest things you have ever come up with," he was laughing at me again. I still couldn't respond. When he finally pulled himself together, he looked at me.
"I've been working with Dumbledore on the full bodied Patronus Charm. The speaking part is his special addition to it," he explained to me.
"That's amazing. Sirius, I'm so proud of you," I did my little happy dance while I was sitting there. "I can only do a Shield Charm, and I am supposed to be really good at this stuff."
"I told you once that I was very charming," he said, lifting his eyebrows at me.
"Yes, you did. Can you teach me to do that?" I asked hopefully.
"Yes, my dear. We can work on it sometime when I visit," he said.
"Yeah!" I did my little happy dance again.
"Honestly. There are days that I don't think that you have aged at all," I rolled my eyes at him. He hugged me tightly again. Yup. I will be eternally eleven in his eyes. Swell. "So, you've kept me up on your classes and Quidditch, what else is going on with you. Are there any boys that I need to speak to?" He raised his eyebrow at me and glared.
"Like I would tell you. I may have some hope of dating again since your gone," I sweetly sneered back. Actually, I had no interest in dating.
"Maybe my love, I want to keep you all for myself," he said, using his best flirty smile.
"Well, that's what Corinne and Katie seem to think. They are convinced that we are secretly making mad passionate love at every chance. It doesn't help that every time I turn around, there is a letter or a gift from you either. The self correcting quill however, is wonderful, thanks for sending it," I joked back at him.
"Well, tonight at dinner we will have to give them something to talk about. A nice big kiss in the Great Hall?" he wiggled his eyebrows at me. "Come on, I've been told I'm quite good at such things."
"Well, yes love, I am sure that you have. You've had more than enough practice. I think however, I will refrain. Just what I need is to give your dear brother any more reason to loathe the ground on which I sit," I said, throwing away the part about his brother.
"What has he done?" Sirius was suddenly angry.
"He hasn't done anything. He's just, creepy. I've found him staring at me a few times this year. We have classes together, and it's just uncomfortable," Sirius had clenched his fists and his face was deep red.
"I will kill him," he breathed under his breath.
"You will do no such thing. Sirius, let it alone, please. Fight your own battle with him, not mine. Okay love. Please," he softened a little. "Come on, I have such a short time with you today, let's talk about something else. Anything else. How is Mrs. Couch?"
"She's fine. She brought Remus and I a pie. I think she was concerned because there are two young men living together in our house. It's rather sweet, she told me to tell you to do well at school, and she is still waiting for your secret for keeping the garden so charming," I laughed at the last part.
"Yes, well you really get around. You're dating me here at Hogwarts and carrying on a torrid relationship with Remus at home. Good to know that you're a switch hitter love," he looked at me puzzled. "It's a player on an American Baseball team that can hit either left or right," he looked even more puzzled. "My younger brother liked American baseball. Do you think that I would get in trouble if I send Mrs. Couch some dragon dung? Or maybe some newt skin, it really helped when I planted it near the peach tree," I fell into him laughing, and he wrapped his arms around me.
"You feel cold, here, put this on." I had only worn my uniform out, without a sweater. As the sun was setting, it was getting colder. Sirius took off his hooded sweatshirt and handed it to me. He was wearing another of the rock band shirts that I had gotten him.
"Cool shirt," I said mockingly as I put the sweatshirt on. It was warm from being on him and it felt good, even though it was huge on me. "Sirius what is that?" I said, pointing at his upper arm.
"It's nothing," he said, trying to pull the short sleeve down.
"That's not nothing. Don't even tell me that it's permanent," I said, getting annoyed. He had a tattoo on his upper arm. It was a symbol that I didn't know, but I did recognize it from Ancient Runes. I wish I had my book here so that I could translate it.
"Anwen, it is. It's a charmed tattoo, it's supposed to help keep me safe," he said quietly.
"What would you need to be kept safe from?" Of course he waited until I was gone to do such stupid things. Tattoos, really.
"Do you really have to ask?" he cocked his eyebrow at me and smirked. Well, no, this was Sirius after all, trouble seemed to follow him. "It was something that we did one night."
"Wait, all of you got them. You boys are nutters. Lily must have been thrilled," when he said 'we' I knew that this was a Marauder's thing. I rolled my eyes at him.
"I thought of all people, you would appreciate my keeping safe," he mumbled.
"Fine, I do. It has to be a testosterone thing. You wouldn't ever catch me having anything drawn on me," I mumbled under my breath. Hey, he dishes it out well, let's see if he takes it as well. "It's kind of sexy though. Makes you look even more dangerous, any other ink under there?" I said, giving him a sly smile, while trying to pick up the bottom of his shirt to look at him.
"Winnie, when did you learn to flirt?" he looked at me shocked.
"Sirius, years of living with you has indoctrinated me well," I said as seductively as I could, stroking his cheek with the back of my finger.
"Oh my, you are going to get yourself into trouble that way someday. Come on, lets go get some dinner, it's getting dark," he stood up, lifting me as he went, until we were standing side by side. "Hey, what was it that you were working on when I got here. You looked very intent."
"Some stuff for my lessons with McGonagall."
"You gonna tell me more?" he questioned.
"You gonna tell me about your work with Dumbledore?" I asked back. We had hit an impasse, and neither was willing to share. I nodded my head toward the castle.
"Come on, climb on for old times sake," he bent down, and I climbed onto his back. It had been a while since we had done this, and for a brief moment, I felt like we were back at that first night. Dinner was an adventure, to say the least. We came in, me still on Sirius back, wearing his sweatshirt, laughing. He swung me around, and sat me on the bench across from Katie and Corinne, then sitting down next to me, with his arm around my waist. They were so excited that he was there, and they kept pointing and giggling. Sirius did nothing to dissuade them of their suspicions, instead making it worse. He kept brushing my hair behind my ear, or reaching over to rub my back, touch my face, whisper something to me. He even insisted on having the elves make me some coffee to have with my dessert, which he wanted to feed to me. I drew the line there. "Stop it now, or I'll use Lily's charm on you" I whispered at him, staring lovingly into his eyes. He looked shocked at first, and then his lip cocked into his most dangerous smile.
"Bullocks! You have the most interesting way with words, my little one," we understood each other.
When dinner was over, Sirius and I walked out into the main hallway, his arm draped over my shoulders.
"Are you sure you can't stick around? You can sleep in the common room," I whinnied.
"No, I should get home, but James and I will see you next Saturday in Hogsmeade. Let me take you shopping please, the Gryffindor seeker should have only the best," he pleaded with me.
"You may go with me while I am shopping, but you will not be spending your money on me," he started to say something. "Forget it, we've had this discussion. You may need your money someday," then he did something completely unexpected. He wrapped his arms around me, lifted me up and swung me around and around. I started laughing out of shock.
"Anwen, I love you with all of my heart," he yelled out.
"What are you doing?" I whispered in his ear.
"Look over by the door," he whispered back. There was his brother, looking furious. "Everything I have is yours. You are the love of my life," he said again, loudly.
"Would you cut it out," I hissed at him "You're only going to make things worse," I guess that I will never date again. By tomorrow morning, people will be convinced that we are getting married. Maybe I should tell him that, wait on second thought, he would probably take it as a chance to buy me some expensive item of jewelry. "Well, now that my humiliation is compete, can you put me down? Thanks for making me the center of this weeks school gossip. Lucky me," I said with fake excitement.
"You'll be fine. Let me know if anything else happens with him okay. I will see you in less than two weeks," he said, taking my hand, and walking me out the castle doors. We made it to 'the spot' on the walk, and he turned and hugged me again.
"I will miss you, and we will all see you soon. Keep smiling and try to enjoy yourself, please, for me. One of us needs to do well at school," I smiled at him.
"Fine. I'll miss you too. Say hi to Remus for me when you get home okay," he nodded and kissed my forehead. I walked back into the castle and up to the tower. When I got to my dorm room, my friends were waiting. They both squealed as I walked in. Oh well I sighed in my head.
I was right, the rumor mill was in full swing. The whispering would stop when I walked in a room. Some girls glared at me, others looked at me in awe. Some boys looked at me completely differently, and I didn't like it. I knew that it had been blown way out of proportion when I went for my Thursday lesson the following week with Professor McGonagall.
"Miss Hodgson, I understand that congratulations are in order," she said as I walked into her classroom.
"Okay, for what exactly?" I said, confused.
"Why, for your recent engagement to Mr. Black," I doubled over in laughter.
"Oh, no, not the staff too," hard belly laughter was raking over me, and I couldn't catch my breath. "Sirius and I aren't even dating. He was just pranking my roommates. Honestly there is nothing going on," I coughed off between laughs.
"Well, all right then. Filius seemed so certain. Well, then, how have you been doing with the transformation on your hand?" she asked, and I was happy for the change in conversation.
"I can get it completely changed, even changing the color of my skin, but holding it is hard," I told her, taking my wand out and transfiguring my hand to show her.
"Miss Hodgson, that is very good. You are progressing nicely; the concentration will come with time. Remember, we don't usually teach this at all at school, let alone to someone who is fifteen. Now that you have your hand, let's work to move the spell up your arm," she commanded, and I followed suit.
My lesson lasted a little over an hour, and I was exhausted when it was done. We had Quidditch practice, so I headed down to the pitch when I was done. I wanted to fly a little before everyone else got here. It helped me to clear my head. Ian and I had worked a little on my ability to see and sense the snitch, so that I could get to it quickly. My flying was as good as ever. I soared over the pitch, going as high as I thought that I would have to when I would be seeking at a game. It was peaceful up here.
The rest of the team was soon there, and Ian was running drills with the Chasers and himself at one end, and the Wythe boys were working on passes at the other end. I had released the practice snitch and I was flying high looking for it. I caught site of it a few minutes later, it was low to the ground, and I dove for it. I had focused on it, and everything else was a blur. I had my hand out, reaching for it and then, I wasn't flying anymore, I was falling. My arm felt like it was on fire and my broom was no longer under me. I couldn't tell how far I was from the ground, but I knew that I was getting close. I hit the ground with a thud and then everything went black.
I woke up in the hospital wing, with the whole team looking down at me.
"Yeallck!" I kind of screeched as I opened my eyes. They were so close it was frightening. "Can I have a little space please?" They all backed up a little, and I looked at Ian. "What happened?"
"Anwen, I am so sorry. You just sort of flew into my path and I couldn't keep from hitting you," Eli said.
"It's okay. I was following the snitch and I kind of zoned out. How far did I fall?" I queried. Pain was beginning to race over my shoulders, back and head.
"About thirty feet. You hit the ground quite hard, and you hit your head. I carried you here. You know you don't weigh much of anything. Madame Pomfrey has healed the broken bones, but she is concerned about a concussion," Ian said. "Great captain I make. James would have never let you get hurt," he said quietly.
"Hey, you didn't do anything. Remember, I got beaned with a bludger when Maggie was captain," I said trying to make him feel better. "I'm gonna be fine."
"Yeah, well, your broom is going to need to be serviced as well. You snapped the handle," he said pensively.
"Great. So much for all the money I saved this summer. Maybe James can fix it when I see him on Saturday," I said, trying to sound hopeful.
"Move, all of you. I need to look at my patient," I heard Madame Pomfrey before I saw her. My teammates parted and she swept in. "Anwen dear, so glad that you are awake. How do you feel?"
"Um, a little groggy, and my shoulder really hurts still. I have a wicked headache too," I said.
"Well, that's to be expected. You have a concussion from your head hitting the ground. I healed the humerus and the clavicle bones, but I think that you may have ripped a muscle in your shoulder. It's been healed as best as I can, but it will need some more time to mend. Muscles are much trickier than bones you know. Now, the rest of you, out. Miss Hodgson needs time to heal," my team was leaving, all except Ian.
"Will she be able to play in two weeks?" Ian asked the school nurse.
"She should be able to. But no flying for a week. You need to let that shoulder completely heal before she risks it again. Now go, she needs to change and get some rest," Ian left, and Madame Pomfrey gave me some pajamas to change into, and some privacy to do so. I was easing myself back into bed, when I heard his unnecessarily loud voice.
"Where is she? What's happened? Madame Pomfrey," he boomed through the room, if I had been asleep, I certainly wouldn't be now.
"Mr. Black, keep your voice down, this is a hospital wing, not a sports arena," she emerged from her office, wagging her finger. "Why are you here anyway?"
"Professor Dumbledore contacted me when she got hurt. Where is she? What happened to her?" he was still quite agitated
.
"She is over here. Keep your voice down, she needs her rest. There was a collision above the pitch and she fell to the ground. I have healed her broken bones and knit the muscles back together, but she did sustain a concussion and I want her to stay here overnight to make sure that she has healed completely. If you keep your voice down, I will let you see her," the privacy screen was still up, so I heard them approaching before they got to me. When she moved the screen, he sped past, coming to grab my face.
"Winnie, love, I can't leave you alone for a minute can I? Are you okay? Do you hurt anywhere?" he was caressing my face, but looking over my body for signs of damage.
"I'm fine. I have a bit of a headache and I'm a little sleepy. My shoulder hurts too, but other than that, I am okay. Stop worrying about me. I was speeding toward the snitch and I wasn't paying attention to what was going on around me, stupid huh?" I said with a slight smile.
"Not stupid, but it was a bit reckless," he smiled at me. He took my in his arms, and nestled down into the bed, much like we did when I was healing from my surgery.
"I see that she is in good hands, but she needs to rest. Don't stay for long Mr. Black," with that, the school nurse left us alone.
"Winnie, my sweet little one, you have to stop scaring me like this. Now, rest. When you wake up we'll have some dinner. Shh, just rest," I felt safe, and comfortable, and it felt so much better to close my eyes. Sirius stroked my head and held me close, and before I knew it I was asleep.