Chapter Thirteen

The doctor showed me to Juliet's room then left to check on his other patients. When I walked into the room a nurse looked up at me. "Oh, I'm sorry," I said trying not to look at anything in particular. I turned around to leave.

"You can stay, Detective." Detective? I wasn't going to say anything about that. "I'm just checking her vitals. Have a seat. I'll be out in a second," she motioned to the chair to the left of the bed. I still couldn't bring myself to look at Jules. I knew it'd be devastating. The nurse walked to the door, but paused and turned to me. She saw how uncomfortable I was sitting there. "Even though she's unconscious; you can talk to Detective O'Hara and even hold her hand. Even though she probably can't hear you, there's still that possibility, you know? It can't hurt."

"Yes it can. I don't want to hurt her," I said quietly not looking up.

"You can't hurt her," she said with a kind smile. "It might help make you both a little more comfortable, that's all." She left and the room became silent. Almost complete silence. A machine beeped every couple seconds to indicate that she was alive. Various types of IVs constantly dripped. Even more reassuring than the beeping; every few seconds I could hear a faint breath. I didn't know if it was Juliet or a machine doing the breathing for her, but it didn't matter.

I took a deep breathe, but I don't think anything could have prepared me to see her like this. She had at least half a dozen IVs and a thing of blood going into her. She had a tube going down her throat and tubes going into her nose to help with breathing. Her left wrist had a soft cast on it, and her neck was wrapped with something that looked like gaze. I just sat and stared at her. I wanted to see her blue eyes again or hear her answer her phone with a short but sweet 'O'Hara' then laugh at me as I used a different bizarre name than I did the last time. Those things I might never experience again.

I carefully reached out to hold her hand. I almost expected for her hand to wrap around mine like it always did, but there was nothing. She was so much cooler than she usually was. Suddenly everything hit my like a brick wall; especially the pain in my arm, but that wasn't too important. Juliet could die from this. Because of me the greatest person to ever grace the world with their presence might die. I wrapped my other hand around her. "Jules. Sweetheart…" I didn't know what to do or what to say. In a way I had just gone through this with my dad, but it felt so different. I leaned down and carefully kissed her hand. "Sweetheart. I am so, so, so sorry. I'm not sure if you can hear me, but I am so sorry. This is all my fault." I laid my head down on the bed next to her hand and continued to mumble my apologies.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew, something hit lightly hit my back. I slowly sat up and tried to work the kink out of my neck without letting go of Juliet's hand. I looked at the clock to see that it was about 4 pm. A knew checkered shirt say next to me. "Kid, when I said take your time I didn't mean come in here and take a nap," my dad said. "I brought you a clean shirt…" I looked down to see the green shirt that I was wearing from the day before had splattered blood from Jules on it. "… but I think you should go home, shower, and rest a little bit."

"Huh uh. No way am I leaving Jules. Remember what happened last time I left her." I nodded to her with my head. "It's hard not to considering she's laying there probably dying."

"Shawn. Everything will be fine if you leave for a few hours." I didn't agree. You should have seen the look on his face when I came back and told him that I worked something out with the doctor and was able to just shower in Jules' bathroom. It was great.

The days went by painfully slow. I was at her side all but maybe an hour a day. I sat, held her hand, and told her stories. At first I felt a little weird sitting there and talking to her, but after a while, I didn't even think about it. I told her different highlights from my childhood with Gus. Some she already knew; others she never heard and I would have to tell her again if I got the chance. I recalled my favourite memories with her. I could imagine hearing her laugh at the funny parts, but her face remained emotionless.

After about six or so days they took the tube out of her throat. I was hoping that meant that she would be waking up soon, but after day nine I was convinced that she never would. They took the bandages that were around her neck off and the sight wasn't pretty. You could easily see the outline of a thick rope in a black and purple bruise. A scar about three inches long ran down the side of her neck. I guessed that was where she was shot with the poison, but by the looks of it it seemed like the needle had been ripped down when she was being injected. She must have put up a fight. My angel was a fighter and that reassured me a little bit. The doctors said that she definitely would come out of this with a ton of scars both physically and mentally. I told her that she would still be beautiful and that I would be by her side the whole time. That is, of course, if she still wanted me.

"Sweetheart, I don't blame you if you don't want me after all of this," I told her on day eleven. "I don't blame you at all. In fact, I wouldn't want me either. You deserve much better than me. We both know that. But if for some reason you do, I promise that I will always be honest with you. But then again, we both know how well I keep promises." I stopped my rant when I heard the door open.

Maryanne stood at the door with tears in her eyes. She shut the door behind her. I stood up as she walked a little closer to me. "You never mentioned that she was kidnapped by a serial killer and almost died."

"I…I'm sorry. I didn't want to worry you when you were out of the country. I was going to tell you, but then you said you were in London and I panicked and…" She did something that surprised me. She closed the three foot distance between us and pulled me into a hug. It felt kind of weird hugging her since I've only really ever met her once, but it was alright. I wondered where Frank or Lloyd was, but I didn't ask. She pulled back and looked at Juliet for a few seconds before turning back to me.

"Thank you Shawn," she said as the tears finally fell over a little. "I talked to her doctor downstairs and he told me everything. Including how you made it to Juliet just on time. You saved my daughter's life and I don't know how to thank you." I didn't know what to say so I just smiled and nodded. Maryanne looked back to Juliet. "She's crazy about you, you know. When I first heard her talk about a Shawn, I never would have thought that I'd still be hearing about this psychic detective seven years later. I've never seen her love a guy so much before. You are really something special to her, Shawn. Thank you for being there for her." She hugged me again, but this time it was a little shorter.

"My pleasure," I said with a sincere smile. " Well, I'll let you have some time with Jules." I motioned to the seat that I had been sitting in for the past week and a half. I walked down the hall with a new hope that if Juliet got out of this, she just might eventually want to stay together.