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Disclaimer: I own nothing except for the plot and any original characters that may be added in later. All rights over characters of the TV show Arrow belong to CW Television and DC Comics.
Pulling her bottom lip into her mouth with her teeth, Felicity zones out as her eyes focus on the machine to her left displaying the black and white image of her baby. She becomes mesmerized by the shape, the outline of its cute little arms and legs. Her eyes drift towards her stomach when she sees an arm move, wondering when she'll actually be able to feel it. A part of her, though, doesn't want to feel it; she doesn't want to establish any more of a connection because she knows it'll only make it harder when she has to give the baby up to another family.
"Felicity?" Doctor Samuels' voice pulls her from her thoughts.
"What? Sorry, I missed that." Felicity turns to the older woman with wide, apologetic eyes, ignoring Oliver's quiet chuckling from her other side.
A small, understanding smile tugs up the corners of Doctor Samuels' mouth before she arches a brow towards the ultrasound machine, "Would you like to know the sex?"
"Um," she stutters and tilts her chin towards Oliver. He shrugs, letting her know that it's up to her while being of absolutely no help. Allowing her mind to drift again, she's brought back to her earlier thoughts, thoughts she has been trying to avoid as much as possible over the past few weeks. She realizes that she doesn't want to know because knowing makes it real; it allows her to dream. It allows her to picture a nursery, with walls green as the jungle, animals peeking out from behind trees and a leaf mobile spinning while the baby sleeps. Or a white crib surrounded by blue skies, with fluffy clouds and flying unicorns. "No," she answers before clearing her throat, blinking back any tears that had gathered in her eyes. It's easier this way; it has to be.
After a second, Doctor Samuels nods and moves to start putting away the equipment, "Alright then, that's it for today. As usual, you can make your next appointment on your way out."
"Thanks," Oliver offers as he stands, waiting for her to clean off her increasingly round stomach.
She fixes her clothes –- side note, she is so thankful that stores have finally started to make cute maternity clothes - and slides to her feet, watching as Oliver holds the door open before following her out. After making another appointment with the secretary that fits both of their schedules, what with him finally being allowed back onto the baseball team after his two-week suspension, they make their way towards where he parked his car.
"So," he starts, sensing something is off with her. While he's not known for being the most observant guy around, he likes to think he knows her well enough to know that she's never quiet for this long unless something is wrong. Her babbling is one of the cutest things about her, the way her eyes get wide with embarrassment and her cheeks flush. It never ceases to bring a smile to his face and right now he knows that all he wants is to see her smile. "Do you want to go get food or something? We can go to Big Belly Burger."
While the idea of a Double Belly Buster and chocolate shake always sounds good, she remembers their plans for the night and sighs, "We can't. Your mom set up an interview with a potential family, remember?"
Oliver's heart drops at the reminder. He's put this off for as long as possible, making up excuse after excuse until his mother stopped buying them and set up an interview with a couple she read about through some prestigious adoption agency. Just the thought makes his stomach churn, but it's what Felicity wants. It's what's best.
Thumbing to the next page of the file Moira handed her, Felicity forces a smile onto her face and tilts her chin, lifting a hand to adjust her glasses on the bridge of her nose. "So, you're a doctor?"
"Pediatrician, yes," Laura Hoffman answers with a wide smile, clearly trying to hide her nerves where she sits next to her husband. She grips his hand in hers, "And Adam is a professor at SCU."
"Literature," Adam clarifies, shifting where he sits on the couch in the Queen family's parlor.
Felicity nods slowly, about to open her mouth with another question before Oliver interrupts.
"Seems like you're never home. Doesn't really sound like a good thing for a kid," he criticizes with a flat tone to his voice, settling back against the cushions.
She pauses and sends a glare his way. He's been acting this way for the entire interview so far, sounding bored and uninterested. Earlier today, he seemed fine, so she has no idea what could've changed to put him in such a bad mood.
Laura clears her throat, sharing a look with her husband, "Well, I work at a family practice with three other doctors, so my hours aren't too bad. And of course, we would both be taking some time off at the beginning to help with the baby." The couple spent the first part of the interview talking a bit about themselves and what led them here. They'd spent almost a year trying to have a baby after being married for five, only to find out that Laura couldn't have children. After considering some different options, they decided that adoption is the route they wanted to go, which brought them here.
"Of course," Moira nods, ignoring her son and moving into some questions about their financial stability.
Quietly, Felicity turns her head towards Oliver with furrowed brows, "Are you okay?"
He stares blankly before shrugging, "I'm fine."
Forced to accept his answer, she turns her attention back to the three adults in the room just as Moira moves on to another question, "So, what kind of life are you hoping to give this child? Obviously, we want to know that they are getting the best life possible."
"We just want to raise a healthy and happy child," Adam says with the ghost of a smile.
Surprising everyone in the room, Oliver starts chuckling. He pulls his lips together to stifle his laughter when they all stare at him in confusion, "Sorry, but that is such bullshit."
"Oliver," Moira scolds.
"What?" he shrugs. "It is. Look," he shifts, leaning forward with his forearms on his knees, "Clearly everyone wants a healthy kid, but what no one will say is that they also want a cute kid. Which you'll get - I mean, look at me. And Felicity, she's hot or else she wouldn't be pregnant by me in the first place."
Her cheeks immediately flush and she stares at him with wide eyes behind her glasses. What the hell is wrong with him?
But he remains undeterred by the looks he's getting and continues with his rant, "The kid might be stupid, too. Felicity's smart but it's half me, and I'm a straight-D student. But hey, I am popular. And I'm also kind of a man-whore. Can that be inherited? I think so. You'll probably end up with a grandkid in seventeen years, then." He chuckles, "I'm going to a party tonight, I could probably get you a 2-for-1 deal."
"Oliver!" Felicity balks at him, part of her thinking that this cannot be real. He can't be saying what he's saying right now.
The Hoffmans shift uncomfortably and Moira stands, "I apologize for my son. I don't know what has gotten into him."
"I'm a little drunk," he cuts in from his spot still relaxing on the couch, not a care in the world.
His mother shakes her head, "I am so sorry. Let me walk you out and maybe we can reschedule this for another time."
Felicity watches from her seat, anger bubbling up inside as she waits for Moira and the Hoffmans to be out of the room. As soon as she's sure that they're out of earshot, she stands and whirls on Oliver, her ponytail swinging through the air, "What the hell was that?! What is wrong with you?!"
"What?" he shrugs as he stands, still acting as casual as ever, "I was just being honest."
"No, you were being an asshole. Are – are you trying to sabotage this or something?"
A look she can't identify crosses his face before he schools his features, "They should know what they're getting. Clearly, they can't handle having a kid."
She huffs out a laugh, "And we can?" Shaking her head, she lifts a hand to rub at her eyes beneath her glasses. "I don't know what you're trying to do or why, but if you say that stuff at the other interviews, nobody is gonna want our kid!"
"Well maybe I do!" he blurts out, surprising them both.
Felicity stares with wide eyes before breathing out, "What?"
"Nothing," he is quick to amend, shaking his head. "Just forget it. I'm going to Tommy's," Oliver informs her before turning around without waiting for a response, grabbing his car keys and avoiding his mother on the way out.
Tugging his phone out of his pocket, Oliver thumbs through one of his social media profiles, not paying enough attention to even know which one. He just needs to appear distracted, which is all part of his plan. A stupid plan, he mentally scolds himself, but he doesn't know what else to do. Since the interview with the Hoffmans, they'd had a few others, all of which went about the same as the first. He knew he was being an ass, his mother had told him so, but he didn't care. The only thing he cared about was that Felicity was mad at him, because he knows she is. They haven't spoken more than five words in the past week and he finds himself missing their conversations, missing the bubbly sound of her laugh when he makes a stupid joke and the passion in her voice when she tries to help him with his homework. But like he told her, these couples should know what they're getting into, which is what he's convinced himself is the reason for his behavior.
"Oliver," his mother says with a stern voice. Moira arches a brow at him, "Do you have somewhere else you need to be?"
He locks his phone and slides it back into his pocket, "Yeah, actually."
"I thought baseball practice is on Thursdays?" Felicity asks quietly, directing a small, apologetic smile towards the couple sitting opposite them, John and Lyla Diggle.
He shrugs, putting on the perfect air of nonchalance, "It is. Tommy's throwing a party and needs me to get a keg."
Felicity's expression hardens and shifts on the couch to face forward, clearing her throat, "He's kidding. Anyway, it says in your file that you've been married twice? To each other?" She can't keep the natural curiosity out of her voice at the odd circumstances describing their relationship, wanting an explanation. She hates mysteries, no matter what kind.
"Yeah," Lyla exchanges a smile with her husband, both chuckling. "We were married after meeting in Afghanistan but when we got home, we realized that we weren't handling our feelings about our time overseas in the best way. So, we decided it was best to get divorced."
"A few years later, we reconnected through work circumstances and since we'd both dealt with our issues, we realized we still loved each other and wanted to give it another try. We've been married for almost six years now," John finishes the story in such perfect harmony, almost like they'd rehearsed it. Which they might have, considering how many times people probably ask about their relationship.
Just as Felicity is about to say how cute she finds the story, Oliver cuts in, "So what happens if you get divorced again? Then the kid grows up in a broken home?"
"Being divorced isn't a broken home, Oliver. A lot of people are divorced and raise perfectly normal children," she glares at him.
"It's okay," John interrupts. He narrows his eyes at the younger man, analyzing him, and Oliver shifts uncomfortably under his scrutinizing gaze. "It's a perfectly valid question. And I can't say that we'll never get divorced; things happen that can't be planned for, circumstances change. But what I can say is that we love each other and we want a family, and no matter what, our child will always come first."
Lyla nods in agreement, squeezing her husband's hand where it rests between them.
The rest of the interview goes very much the same, with Oliver questioning everything they say and making smart-ass comments, but luckily, the Diggles don't seem as bothered by him as the other three couples did.
When Moira ends the interview, everyone stands. "It was very nice to meet you both," the Queen matriarch smiles, "Thank you so much for meeting with us."
"Thank you for considering us, it means the world," Lyla lets out a nervous breath, a genuine smile gracing her face.
The house phone ringing pulls Moira's attention away and she is quick to apologize, "I'm sorry, I have to take this. I've been expecting a call from one of our foundations."
"I'll walk you out," Felicity says and takes a step before John raises a hand to stop her.
"Actually," he turns towards Oliver, who hadn't even bothered to stand from his seat on the couch, "I was hoping Oliver could walk us out. I have a few questions for him, if you don't mind."
Her eyes widen in worry and she chews on her bottom lip, "Are you sure? Cause he's been sick all week, I think it's finally gone to his head. A fever, probably. We really should call a doctor."
Oliver rolls his eyes and rises to his feet, "I'm fine. The door's this way." He leads them through the mansion towards the front door, brows furrowing slightly as he watches John tell his wife to wait in the car, leaving them alone in the foyer. "You said you had a question or something?"
"Or something," John mutters to himself, crossing his arms over his chest, the large muscles testing the seams of his shirt. "I actually have some advice. This act you're putting on… It sucks."
"Excuse me?" he arches a brow. "I'm not -"
"Don't try and lie to me. I'm trained in interrogation skills you wouldn't believe, and you're full of shit," the older man says bluntly. "I get what you're trying to do and I'm telling you, it's only going to backfire. Just tell Felicity what you want."
After a few seconds, Oliver swallows thickly, "And what's that?"
A small smile tugs at the corners of his mouth, "That you want to keep your child, Oliver. You don't have to feel ashamed about it, I understand. But if you keep acting this way, you're just going to make things worse for yourself and then twenty years from now, you're gonna look back and wish you'd said something to stop this adoption." John unfolds his arms and shrugs, the expression on his face adopting a level of smugness, "But hey, I barely know you."
And with that, Oliver watches, stunned into silence, as John opens the front door and leaves.
Taking in a steadying breath, Oliver wraps his knuckles against the door before opening it at the faint sound of a 'come in'. He peeks inside, immediately losing half the courage he'd built up at the look on Felicity's face when she sees him. Even though he can tell how angry she is, he needs to do this. "Can we talk?"
"I don't know, can we?" she crosses her arms over her chest and cocks a hip, "Don't you have a party to go get drunk at?"
He presses his lips together tightly and steps fully into the room, closing the door behind him and lifting a hand to rub at the back of his neck. "No, I… I want to talk."
After a few seconds, she sighs, "Fine. Talk."
"I'm sorry for the way that I've been acting. You were right; I've been trying to sabotage the interviews, and I'm sorry. It wasn't fair."
Her expression softens at his honesty, her arms falling at her sides. Felicity is reminded of the last real conversation they had and steps forward, closing some of the distance between them. Her chin tilts down a little and her voice has lost most of its edge. "Did you mean it?" At the confusion on his face, she clarifies, "When you said you wanted to keep the baby. Did you mean it?"
Oliver breathes in slowly before nodding, "Yeah. Yeah, I meant it. I've been thinking about it and – and I didn't know how to tell you because I know this adoption is what you want but -"
"- It isn't," she interrupts and his eyes widen.
"What?"
"It's not," she shakes her head, "It's not what I want. The more I've thought about it…" A hand drifts to rest on her stomach, thumb stroking over it gently and a soft smile tugging at her lips as she gazes down, "I can't imagine another family raising her. Rocking her to sleep, teaching her to ride a bike, holding her hand on the first day of school. I just -"
Now it is Oliver's turn to interrupt with a step forward, "Her? Did you say her?"
Head flying up, Felicity looks at him with wide eyes, "I'm sorry! I – I called the doctor two days ago. I had to know. Please don't be mad."
"Mad?" he exhales a watery laugh. "We're having a daughter. And you want to keep her?"
Her own eyes glazing over, her smile grows, "Yes. I want to keep our daughter, Oliver. I know it'll be hard, but I don't care. I love her and I want to keep her."
He can't help but laugh as a smile overtakes his entire face and he closes the distance between them, pulling her into a tight hug, one hand wrapping around her waist and the other threading through her hair. He closes his eyes, breathing in her sweet scent as she relaxes in his embrace, happiness and something else he can't identify thrumming through his veins. Slowly, he starts to pull away just enough so he can see her face, both hands framing her cheeks. Oliver sweeps his thumbs under her eyes where a few tears began to trail and he becomes lost in her eyes. They're so blue, even more than usual, and an overwhelming want - no, need - to kiss her overcomes him, making his eyes drift to her impossibly pink lips of their accord.
Before he can do anything, Felicity gasps slightly and glances down. His brows furrow in concern, "What? What's wrong?"
"Nothing," she chuckles, "I think she's happy. She just moved."
The smile finds its way back on his face as she meets his eyes, matching his expression, and all he feels in this moment is… complete.