Chapter 13 – Hurt

"Being a good writer is 3% talent and 97% not being distracted by the internet."

The god admitting that he felt nothing towards him made his heart feel as though it had been ripped from his chest – his real heart, although having the arc reactor pulled out hurt a lot too. The billionaire had lost all ability to make a witty remark and was only capable of dragging himself into the living room.

He was stupid for thinking that Loki had changed. He was an idiot for thinking that trickster cared. He didn't deserve to be an Avenger if he let the number #1 top enemy affect him like it did. It didn't matter if it was Steve who was currently a cat, Loki would treat the soldier exactly the same way as himself.

Tony was now seriously considering just going back to his home and using his kind of basic knowledge of magic to transform himself back into his human form so he could drink away the horrid feeling in his stomach. He didn't even feel this bad when Pepper dumped him, although that was probably because he had Loki to keep his thoughts occupied. Perhaps he should develop an obsession with another villain to keep him sane... But, even with the feelings of betrayal, hurt and sadness mixing up inside of him, part of him still hoped that he would be the soft, squishy man he'd grown fond of recently.

He had never been properly heartbroken before but this was what he assumed it felt like. He was heartbroken over a guy who he wasn't in a relationship with in the first place...

His internal rant was interrupted by the god joining him in the living room and sitting on the couch about two feet away from where he was pouting on the floor. The room was silent and it dragged on for what seemed like forever, getting more and more awkward by the second. Tony wanted to say something but knew that once he started talking then he wouldn't be able to contain all of his anger towards Loki.

He had to ask what was on his mind; this was a big red button just waiting to be pushed by any idiot willing to risk it, "No other feelings, eh?"

Loki looked taken aback by the sudden question and fumbled for words before replying with a meek, "What I meant was-"

"You're no different at all! I thought you had changed but, no, you're just the same asshole Loki you've always been! You are incapable of thinking about anyone other than yourself, not even your own cat!" Anthony Edward Stark wasn't known for his patience, no, he was know for blowing things up.

"Why does it matter so much to you?"

"Because I care about some bastard who is just waiting for an opportunity to throw me out!"

"You... care about... me?" If it wasn't for the anger bubbling inside of him, Tony would have noticed how the god stumbled in his speech, how he had an expression on his face that had never been seen before and how it was a perfect opportunity to just kiss and make up – well, no kissing unfortunately but it was a good time to forget it before the whole situation got for too out of hand. He knew how Bruce felt now when he was the Hulk, with uncontrollable rage that just needed to be let loose and there was nothing he could do to stop it. All he could compute in his mind was how to insult and make people hate him, he wanted to make Loki pay for leading him on and then practically breaking his heart with his heartlessness.

"Oh well done, genius. And, you know what? I'm an idiot for even thinking that you were alright in the first place because you're nothing but a heartless liar who deserves to be alone."

"I don't always lie..."

"No, you don't. You obviously weren't lying when you said you had no other feelings."

"But, Stark, you don't understand!" Loki sounded worried and it almost made the billionaire see sense again. Almost.

"Oh I understand perfectly now. If you didn't want me around then you should have just said at the start."

"Fine, leave then! Don't come crying back to me when nobody believes you're Tony Stark!"

~x~

Loki stormed off to his bedroom and cut off the spell allowing him to hear what Tony's saying, he didn't want to hear him any more. He sat on his bed and sulked like a child for what must have been an hour. Lying always had bad consequences, he had discovered that before, but if he had of known that one little sentence would make the billionaire hate him then he would never of said a thing. He would have told the truth instead of listening to his instinct.

Tony cared. Tony cared. Tony had been brave enough to admit that he cared when he wasn't. This is what separated the heroes from the villains: the ability to be brave and tell the truth, even when it was uncomfortable and you could just lie easily instead. They were too different and now Stark hated him, it would never work between them now.

It had been too long since he had stormed off and the sulking in his room didn't help the guilt that made him feel sick. Cautiously, the god opened the door and shuffled towards the living room, eyes focused on the faint spots of flour on the carpet that he couldn't get earlier. Only earlier that day he was laughing with the mischievous kitten and now he had taken their friendship way back to step 1. He tried to think of an apology but they all sounded far too sappy for a god like him – he'd just have to improvise.

The living room was silent and Stark wasn't in sight thankfully, Loki didn't want to look the billionaire in the eye while he was giving a heartfelt apology. He took a deep breath before he began to speak, "Star- Tony, I... didn't exactly mean anything I said earlier..." The living room was still silent, only the trickster's own breath was the only sound, "Tony?"

He looked around the sofa in a hurry and then checked it again when he didn't find the kitten, in hope that he'd just overlooked the little ball of brown fluff with a white circle on his chest and big brown eyes. Stark wasn't anywhere in sight and Loki then started to panic; the last thing he had said to the billionaire was to leave and not return.

The hallway was empty too, along with the kitchen, and it wasn't until he had checked the entire apartment about three times that he let go of the little bit of hope inside of him that said that the kitten could just be hiding.

The billionaire had run away.