Chapter 13

Day 10.

The walls reek of urine and other bodily substances that I cannot seem to discern. Whatever it was they injected in me, it has disorientated me and I cannot seem to get a grip on reality.

Mother is sitting in a corner. She is eating her right hand. Her hair is greasy, she herself looks pale and emaciated and she seems to be losing her mind. Or so that is what I see.

How cruel of them.

Either I was lied to my entire life or my poor beautiful disgusting mother has succumbed to insanity.

I doubt it. I think my mind is playing tricks on me. She is most certainly dead. My own senses cannot be trusted. I close my eyes hoping to drift into another fit of sleep but it never comes for acid runs through my veins and I cannot ignore it. Despite the years of training it seems all of my skills have left me.

I hope I die.

I hope that thing kills me. It will be better that way. I hope it does not succeed. I hope it is a failure. I'm trash. Nothing more than trash. How did I even fall this low? I'm lower than dirt now.

I used to have principles but now… I can only think of the sin I have committed against the only people I had left. Then again, I am here in this situation because of them.

No, I cannot shift the blame to them. This was my decision.

Why did I have to go and develop a regard for them? Why couldn't I just keep them out?

There's suddenly a blinding light, further irritating my nerves. I think my eyes are going to melt through my skull even though my eyelids are closed. There's a hand on my cheek. My chains are being pulled, the shackles rubbing against my raw burns.

Daichi.

I can tell it's him by his smell, the way he walks, the way his heart beats when he enters the room and by the way he touches me. He is careful even though it's not necessary since my body is completely shattered. He hardly applies any pressure. He only touches as if to confirm I'm still here.

He comes whenever he can which is not often but the act itself is frightening. He hasn't forgotten, that is not as I had hoped. He too has done something he will regret. He's infatuated.

All this effort, this pain, for nought. Damn it!

Ah, the irony.

I was made for death and yet I expected happiness. I worked so hard to escape from their clutches instead they have removed my limbs and severed all exits. Now I only have my set of skills that they so 'graciously' bestowed upon me and my sanity. So, the only will is my own.

I do not even have a right on my own body anymore. Who knows what they're doing to my body right now. Certainly not me. I do not remember my name. They keep calling me 'halfu'. As if it is something to be ashamed of, as if I am a degenerate, as if I am the animal here.

The hand is moving again. It's tightening the shackles. I didn't know they could be tightened anymore.

I can feel my heartbeat slowly decrease. The blood isn't circulating well and I think the shock is starting to wear in. How sardonic, out of all the things I did not think I would die of shock.

He slaps me. I know because my head snaps to the side but I don't feel any pain. I can't anyway.

'You're not allowed to die' he says. 'It'll soon begin' he says. 'This hurts me, more than it hurts you' he says.

For some unfathomable reason, my heartbeat returns albeit not to the normal rate either. He seems satisfied for he leaves soon. I can feel everything and nothing.

My being is attacked by sudden impulses again. Craving. What am I craving? I can feel my breath quicken. My throat constricts. My eyes snap open and everything is a haze. My nostrils flare. I cannot move my head.

What did they do to me, I do not know myself. Who knows.

Mother is back.

This time she is closer and she has brought someone with her. It's a little girl and belatedly I realise it's me. This is most certainly a hallucination since my mother was never in the same room as me let alone hold my hand. Never.

Behind them is Father. His eye sockets are leaking blood since his eyeballs are missing. He's holding them in his hands before he eats them and gladly chugs them down his gullet. Mother pulls out a dagger and pulls it across her tongue so that it completely slices off.

She then lowers it to the young girl's mouth, who opens it willingly. However, the girl does not remove her tongue in lieu the mother lets her daughter's tongue dance at the tip of the dagger. She then pulls it out and brings it dangerously close to the girl's eyes. So close that she strips the girl of her eye lashes.

She drops the dagger to the girl's chest and lets the tip drag along.

My hand reaches out for Mother, 'P- P- P- Please. Do- Don't t- t- do th- tha- that.' Somehow I croaked those words out despite not having a voice. Maybe I brought it back with magic.

Mother smiles wickedly, her teeth stained red, her blue eyes sunken in and dull 'This is my gift for you, dear. So we can be a happy… family.'

My eyes are burning. Maybe the acid reached there too. 'M- M- M- Mother. Is- s- s- isn't th- the- there another- way?'

Father stepped forward, grabbing the girl's shoulder none too gently.

'No'

I heard screaming but I didn't know who was screaming. The young girl's mouth was moving, wide and frantic but similarly so was mine. The screams distorted and I soon saw the beating heart pulled out of the girl's chest and thrown to the ground.

Mother and Father were gone and the girl was left in tatters. She crawled towards her frozen heart and cradled it in her bloody hands. She rocking back and forth holding the heart to her hollowed chest. She was a pathetic sight but I did not shed a tear for her.

She abruptly pulled out a box from behind her and carefully deposited it in there. The box was simple but looked to made of titanium. Light but tough. The many locks on the box and it looked to be indestructible. Several of the key holes suddenly closed in itself the moment she shut the box.

But before she could even move the box to a more secure area it started to leak. It was a dark substance, vicious and putrid.

Sitting in the darkness I tried to look away. Another story of the bitter pills of life. It was pathetic, all of it, it was just pathetic.

When I got away I only got so far. I was never alive. And I won't be born again. I will never survive.

My heart was still spewing blood and dead memories.

Dead memories from my heart.

Is this why Alucard became the way he is?

Father never returned. Unfortunately, the same couldn't be said for dear Mother.

Unfortunately, I will always find a way to survive.

;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;

Seras' eyes flashed with concern as she looked over to Alucard. He had gone off several days ago in a foul mood only to return in a fouler mood. She didn't even know where he had been sent off to; she only knew he had been abroad.

Not only that but she had been given the orders to 'Defend'. Yet, she did not even know what against.

"Master?" Seras called from behind.

She received no answer.

"Master, please help me understand."

Alucard emitted a deep sigh, "I was sent to Japan to deal with the enemy".

"Daichi?"

Alucard glanced over to Seras from the window that he had taken to gaze through, he paused for a moment before answering "Hellsing is a proud establishment and would not allow for any disrespect".

Seras nodded numbly "Master, I don't believe Yuki willingly went against us". Seras hesitated when she took note of how hard Alucard's fists clenched and how tense he became "because Master… she came back for me, for Hellsing, she could've left me to die".

"It doesn't matter anymore, Seras."

Seras was taken back by the use of her name but before she could open her mouth, Alucard continued "the chess board is set and now… we must play our parts. No matter where we find ourselves".

"But she kept her promise, Master"

"It doesn't matter anymore" Alucard whispered before he disappeared into the shadows.

;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;

Blood pooled around the stakes like a lake. Alucard's signature couldn't have been mistaken for anything else. The stakes were aligned to form the words "WE ARE ON A MISSIOM FROM GOD".

Daichi sniffed the air and grimaced internally, the stench of blood had spread at least five kilometres.

"They're not dead"

Daichi was not surprised to find Yuki to his right, "How can you tell?"

"They're vampires. Had they perished their bodies would have turned into ash. Moreover, they're the yakuza's that supported our move towards the triad. With them gone, we'll be alone against them. Hellsing planned to isolate us for what you did to them".

Daichi raised a brow "What I did?"

"You underestimated them. They are a proud lot, you shouldn't have shown such disrespect by refusing them their answers. The only way to appease them would be to either punish me or apologise to them yourself. However, seeing as how you yourself are so proud, I suppose the latter would be out of the question".

Daichi chuckled, "Well, it seems I'll have to sacrifice you then". He lit himself a cigar and huffed "and here things were going so well".

"Plans are bound to fail…. chaos on the other hand never fails to satisfy", Yuki side glanced him and continued to stare at the carnage.

Daichi's eyes narrowed into slits "Not entirely, our little mole is in place, and I'll ensure I get my dues for what they're forcing me into".

Yuki did not approve of his methods but she accepted it as life and continued her duty, "Shall I send an invitation then?"

"But of course".

Yuki began to saunter off but she stopped dead in her tracks when Daichi uttered hi last words…

"I can't promise to hold back, but know this… I truly am sorry for the pain I will inflict upon you. It wounds me more than it does you".

But how is that possible? You've never known what a grievous wound is like on the mind of the inflicted.

;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;

Integra had reluctantly accepted the invitation. It was a risky matter, walking right into enemy territory simply to receive an apology. Integra's only solace was that Alucard and Seras were by her side.

As the plane landed they were led to a black Escalades where they were transported to the traditional home of the Ryuuichirou family. Even the security that had been posted in the area seemed to blend in to the ancient style.

They were met with more tight security and Yuki at the front gates. She was wearing an armour not too dissimilar to the one she wore during the Nazi strike on Britain. Seras was struck by how much Yuki had changed.

She was taller than Seras now, almost reaching Alucard's nose and her eyes seemed much sharper. Her hair was much longer, reaching up to her waist now and her body was much leaner than previously. In the past, she had had an aura of authority which was also the case now but her presence was much more darker and almost sombre.

She bowed as they entered but overall Yuki was unfazed. Her stoic expression was unnerving as she was unreadable, she gave nothing away, and her defences had been consolidated over the years therefore her mind was even harder to breach let alone look into. Alucard gnashed his teeth together at the mere sight of her and he felt his hands start to bleed as his fingernails dug in his palms.

It would be an understatement to say that Yuki was intimidating. She may not have looked like much but her piercing gaze as well as her composed form made her look as if she was omniscient. As if she could read her victims minds and stare right through their souls.

"Did you have any respect for Hellsing?" Integra said, her voice was cold and firm like the Iron Maiden she was "or were we just pawns?"

Yuki did not give them so much of a reply, she simply stood there with one hand dangling and the other resting on the hilt of her katana. Her poker face was starting to irritate Integra. She had yet to give them any acknowledgment; Alucard sauntered towards her, his dangerous aura matched Yuki's own imposing aura.

Once he was about a foot away he slightly leaned over so that his face was inches above hers "Traitors are all the same, and they all meet the same demise, by my hands."

The yakuza who had sauntered out to greet them smirked triumphantly as if he had just proven a point, had Alucard known the truth behind Yuki's actions, he wouldn't have dared utter those words to her. Ever.

As Seras gawked at Yuki, she caught something rare: she saw emotion in the mighty assassin. Seras could not help but pity Yuki that moment.

She could tell by one look, and despite her firm mask on, Seras knew: Yuki was genuinely hurt.

"I welcome you Hellsing" Daichi opened his arms as a gesture, "Please, come in".

Integra had expected some form of reaction from Yuki but the more she stayed in her presence the more she vexed Integra.

Once they had been brought to Daichi's court, it was made obvious that the tension between Hellsing and Ryuuichirou had spread like wildfire among the yakuza world for all of the old leaders were also present in the meeting.

As well as the two main parties, the others included the Yamauchi family to Daichi's right, then the Suzuki family and then the Tachibana family. To Daichi's left were the Yamamoto family, the Inoue family and then the much disliked Arai family. In the middle sat Daichi with Yuki closely to his right.

Once their shoes had been deposited in the genkan, which was the main entrance of the house where one removed their shoes, they were brought to the main room where they were seated in their allocated places on crimson zabutons. Several of the elders sniffed and gasped in disgust as Alucard entered with his shoes on.

There was a murmur of disappointment and shame which Seras was unfortunate enough to catch. She did not feel comfortable being surrounded by this many people, on top of that the kind that looked down on people like her, gaijin. Yuki had once explained to her how the term gaijin was used; composed of two kanji, those being 'gai' meaning outsider and 'jin' meaning person. Typically used with negative connotations with the intended message that the other person was an alien or non-Japanese person. Well, at least Alucard was with them and several dozen Hellsing soldiers were just outside the walls.

This was not going to end well.

Alucard refused to sit down, least of all the floor, so he lingered in the shadows although his glowing red eyes could have been spotted even by the blind.

Once the shojis were closed shut, there was a moment where green tea was offered. Seras found the yunomi cute, wishing she could take hers home and was about to ask but then she remembered this was not a dream. This was not a dream where Yuki had returned and she was introducing them to her family. No. This was a show of power.

"I believe my subordinate has caused you offence".

Integra had a mind to correct him, to remind him that he too caused offence. "That is correct".

Daichi averted his gaze to the fusuma that was decorated with beautiful Sakura tress and raining Sakura petals. When his eyes landed back on Integra, she couldn't help but liken them to cat's eyes.

"As her master I will permit you to request a punishment for her, but as her husband I will not allow you to lay a hand on her".

"Husband?" Integra asked sharply. She could feel the heat and fury radiating off of Alucard.

What treachery was this? This probably made Alucard's year, no, no, his century.

"Yes, husband. " The bastard stressed the word so as to anger Alucard and it was working. "This here is my wife, Yuki Ryuuichirou, also my right hand woman and trusted advisor, second head of the family".

Integra appraised them silently before she queried "and how am I to punish one I cannot physically harm?"

The yakuza raised a brow in arrogance. Integra felt her brow scrunch further to which the yakuza retorted with "Do you feel that your pride and honour have been injured?"

Integra breathed out in astonishment "Yes"

The yakuza leaned back in his seat "and you want to see some punishment?"

"Of course!" Integra could not believe this man.

Daichi lowered his head as he now assessed her "are you quite sure, Sir Fairbook Wingates Hellsing, you want me to punish Yuki?"

Integra hesitated "Yes"

He nodded "Very well. Yuki!"

Yuki stepped forth and had her head bowed as if she knew what was to come. Several masked assassins grabbed her arms and began to drag her away in the most degrading way, shouting at her as though she were some animal. The whole court arose and they began to enter through a door in the far side of the room. They all followed by. The door led to stairs going down into a dark chasm.

Integra was quickly shadowed by Alucard and Seras ran behind. Upon entrance Seras cringed and subconsciously brought herself closer to Alucard, who had yet to make any remark on the whole business. They had stepped in to what seemed to be an underground torture room.

There were all sorts of torture devices on the wall, hanging, awaiting to be used. Some were brand new and this could be told by their menacing shine but most were ancient, which could be told thanks to the dull shine and slight rust at the hinges.

The room had a vast empty square in the middle and there were seats on the edges around the square; each purple cushion for each court member.

As the court seated themselves and the Hellsing group stood to one side; some other men pulled two wooden poles into the middle of the square and set them down, parallel to each other.

Yuki was then harshly stripped of her weaponry and her shirt was cut from behind, exposing her back to the audience. Her hands were then bound and tied to each post with rope. She was pushed to her knees and she had bowed her head once more in shame. Her hair had become dishevelled and fell in front of her face so that half of her upper face was not visible. She was directly facing the yakuza boss as well as Integra, Alucard and Seras.

Suddenly, the room was quiet and Integra noted how all members - except the yakuza boss - seemed to be grinning like a Cheshire cat at the scene. One servant in the far end had her hand to her mouth and look as though she were gagging on something. Suddenly Integra felt a foul feeling in her gut, telling her that danger was about to come.

Yuki's back was heavily scarred and it dawned on Seras as well as Alucard as to why Yuki was so sensitive towards her back. It had scarred to the extent that the skin became raised and calloused. The scars indicated that this was not Yuki's first lashing. Nor would it be her last. Seras bit her tongue upon realisation that Yuki had been in these people's hands before.

One of the assassins that dragged Yuki in was holding a leather black whip that had teeth on the tips, just waiting to sink into fragile skin. There was a loud crack and Integra watched in horror as he slashed Yuki's already scarred back again and again. Seras gave a loud shrill cry when the whip cracked. It was here did Integra take note of Yuki's severely scarred back. It looked as if she'd been flogged many times.

However Yuki did not make a sound, in fact, the only indications that she was giving that she was in pain was that her hands that were gripping the ropes so fiercely that her knuckles were pure white. She would not even flinch. With every crack came more and more blood. Lapping over the scars again and again.

Her sweat drenched her shirt to a point it was just hanging.

Seras could hear her constrained breathing: it was torture just watching. The yakuza raised a hand, signalling the man to stop "Yuki, what do you have to say to Sir Hellsing here?"

Yuki sighed "I- my loyalties lie with my kin-...with my true master..." it was evident that it was paining her to speak let alone have the strength to raise her head "I... was doing my duty, Sir Hellsing. I would betray you- for the sake of my master again if I was given the choice."

The yakuza looked more than satisfied "Carry on" he commanded the man, who began his vicious assault again. The yakuza stood and began his departure as well as his court "five thousand lashes!" was all he said as he passed Sir Hellsing.

Integra could only stare with hardened eyes as Yuki took her lashings. Her palms shook with rage, had she known this was the punishment, she would've done it herself so as to lessen the blow.

With every fifty lashes another assassin would come and switch with the current assassin; which made Seras wonder what type of sick person would have the pleasure of flogging a woman who had done no crime against her master. The Hellsings watched as flesh was ripped apart over and over again; with the amount of blood that was shed it wasn't hard to see why Yuki was now bathing in her own blood as well as the assassins.

It was perfection. How they slashed her over and over again. They purposefully lapped every scar from the past and reopened them.

Alucard surveyed the scene with a sick sense of nostalgia for he too had received this treatment though not to the same extent. His anger for Yuki somewhat diminished when he witnessed her 'punishment'. Her proclamation had been a lie. He knew because despite her efforts to control her heart, it still skipped a beat, which was a clear sign of a lie. He had no doubt that had she not lost so much blood Yuki would've been able to control the beating of her heart.

Now, it frightened him as to how erratic her heart beat was as if she were having a heart attack. However, the feelings were repressed since his anger was still floating about. He would not forgive this easily, no matter how much she is punished.

Sir Hellsing had just about enough but then when she was about to make a move she was pulled aside by the very female servant that had secretly retched on the side at the sight of Yuki's punishment.

She was a pretty little thing, too fragile, willowy. Concern was splattered all over her face "You mustn't interrupt her punishment" she began hastily.

"Why not?" Alucard growled.

The servant looked about alarmingly "Do not tell me that you believed what she had told you?"

"What?"

The servant shook her head and glanced about "Yuki only said what the Lord wanted to know, she would have never have said that otherwise. She saved you, she protected you and took the shame upon her name-..." she harshly cut herself off.

She quickly squeaked "They know" and she was off running.

The lashings had come to an end however it was still a grizzly sight. Flesh hung off her back in pieces and Yuki was barely breathing.

"Sat…is…fied?"

The voice had been so unfamiliar that it took Integra a moment to collect herself and retort, "Pardon?" she looked for the voice.

She couldn't comprehend that the raspy weal voice had belonged to Yuki, "Are… you…. Satisfi-ed..?"

The desperation in her tone was evident and Integra felt a toad lodge itself in her throat. Yuki was in such a state that she had lifted some of her boundaries whether it was consciously or not.

"Satisfied."

;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;

Yuki twitched as a wet rag dabbed on her wounds.

She was quickly shushed.

"I told you. I'm sorry for abusing your body but… it was for the best" Daichi swiped his tongue over his lips "I have the upper hand".

Yuki cleared her throat "How long?"

"You were out for about two hours before you came around, but you wouldn't sit still so I had you sedated. It's been twelve hours now. I had to keep you in a coma so your body will heal".

When Yuki didn't reply, Daichi pressed down on her wounds and innocently leaned over her ear "Are you angry with me?"

Yuki shakily inhaled though Daichi failed to notice "No".

"Good"

Yuki then felt something warm and wet touch her cheek. Daichi was licking her face and slowly migrated to her lower neck "rest, let me take care of the rest, when you awake I'll show you… how Hellsing will fall from her mighty throne".

"Of course" Yuki replied without missing a beat "You already set the board to favour yourself".

"This is my gift for you, Yuki. So we can be a happy family."

To be continued…

No, I am not dead. And I will aim to finish this story soon. The end is nearing. Please review and thank you for those who have been patient with this story.

Suki