Fluttering Petals
No sooner had Kanae pulled the strap of her overnight bad more securely over her shoulder to knock on the door than the thing was flung open she found herself in the hysterical embrace of a particularly constricting Kyoko.
"Moko-san!" she cried, her grip reaching a rib-threatening crescendo as she dragged her best friend inside.
Kanae fought to pry her off and back-peddled to a safe distance, clutching her bag protectively to her chest. Her brow twitched as she fought down the urge to yell and instead moved to pat Kyoko awkwardly on the head. "Half a dead rat, huh? That must have been horrible."
"Yes it was, but the important thing is that I'm not you." Kyoko said as she lunged forward and grabbed Kanae by the shoulders. "And I'm not Amamiya-san and that doesn't leave anyone else!" she wailed, shaking Kanae back and forth so hard she came to resemble a nodding dog in a car window.
Kanae regained her senses and struggled free from a manic grasp for the second time in as many minutes. "What are you talking about?" she couldn't help but yell in confusion.
Kyoko let out a terrible wail and as best as Kanae could describe just sort of melted into a puddle of despair.
"Oi." she said, poking at Kyoko with a toe. "I can see you're upset about something other than decapitated rodents, but if you don't explain then I can't understand."
Kyoko nodded, oozing over to the couch and Kanae followed warily to take a seat next to her. She was silent for a few seconds and then, like a broken dam, a cascade of words poured out of her at great speed and volume. Kanae felt she was about to be washed away as the entire 'Tsuruga situation' was related to her in graphic detail, accompanied by wild hand gestures and a lot of alarming head movements. At the end of it Kyoko's hands dropped into her lap and she powered back down into a state of jellified misery.
Kanae regarded her friend thoughtfully for a while. Honestly, she had harboured mounting suspicions since Ren's behaviour over the PV, and had a hard time believing even Kyoko could be so dense that it had come as this great of a shock. She wasn't stupid, perhaps a little naive and ignorant regarding the softer emotions in life, but she wasn't quite emotionally retarded.
Stunted was probably a better term – she had been betrayed by the one person she trusted from what she had told Kanae, and been cut deeply. Her heart had been lacerated and Kanae suspected she had developed some sort of self-preservation mechanism that kicked in to make her recoil from love unconsciously in much the same way a normal person automatically pulled back their hands when touching something hot.
To be rejected was unpleasant, but to be thrown away must be infinitely worse. Kanae had been rejected, and knew the depression that went with people not accepting her, but what if someone she loved and trusted suddenly dumped her flat? What if Kyoko one day turned around with cruel words and dismissed her from her life, told her that everything she believed about what their friendship meant was nothing more than a false assumption Kyoko had allowed her to make because it suited her purposes at the time? She shuddered.
Wounds of the heart were tricky, and Kanae felt she was not really qualified or experienced enough to help. But she couldn't do nothing and just leave her in this state, Kyoko was her best friend and she cared deeply for the girl even if she would shave herself bald before admitting it aloud. She fought down a wild sort of panic that was far more befitting of her companion and tried to think logically.
"Okay, so we know his feelings. What about yours?" she said finally.
Kyoko dropped her head in her hands. "I...like him... maybe l-l-love him." she mumbled.
"I know that." Kanae said gently, trying not to get impatient. "You're about as subtle as an elephant in a sequin waistcoat when it comes to who you strongly like and dislike. But are you in love with him?"
She sighed out half a lifetime's worth of sighs in one breath and the effort seemed to leave her drained. "Yes, I've been thinking about it for a while. This feels different to what I've felt before, not so much stronger than what I felt for the idiot, but... deeper somehow. It's like I thought I knew everything about fire from a candle, but then got tossed into a blazing inferno and realised I actually knew nothing at all."
"You love him, and he loves you. Usually from here it's simple. Usually."
Kyoko's eyes grew distant and pained as she drew her knees up to her chest and hugged herself. "I don't want to get hurt like that again. I can't take being hurt like that again."
"Then it really comes down to if you can trust him with your heart."
"That's the biggest problem. I think I can." Kyoko said, her voice muffled as her head flopped down and she spoke through her arms. "I want to say I don't trust him and let that be the end of it but I can't. I already have faith in him, but if that faith is destroyed I don't think I'll ever get over it."
Kanae licked her lips. "Um, you know... even if it turns out badly, it won't be like last time. You won't be left completely alone." she said, flushing. "You'd still have, uh, me and other friends. I'm not dismissing your fears or anything, but you do have something of a safety net – maybe it wouldn't break your fall entirely but it might stop you hitting the ground at full speed."
"Moko-san!" Kyoko cried and Kanae braced for impact. As a rare concession she allowed her friend to hug the breath from her lungs, but she pouted the entire time until she was released.
"Take some time to think about it – calmly. Try and resolve your feelings and decide what you really want, and what you'd be willing to lose. Whatever you decide, I think you owe it to him to be completely sure of your decision after you made him confess in such an un-cool way." she chuckled and was pleased to see the ghost of a smile flitter across Kyoko's face.
"You're right, I'll think about it properly. Thank you Moko-san, I don't know what I'd do without you."
"Mo! Panic yourself into a coma probably." Kanae snorted, though the sincerely spoken words warmed her and helped assure her that she would not be forgotten no matter what happened.
Kyoko smiled and wiped at her eyes. No tears had fallen but she had been in a state of near-weeping discomposure for as long as Kanae had been there at least, and she suspected ever since her mind had wrapped itself around exactly who Ren must have meant by a Love Me member who wasn't Kanae or Chiori.
"Are you hungry? I feel terrible that you had to rush over like this so the least I can do is feed you."
Kanae reeled a little from the abrupt subject change and nodded. "A little – something small and low in calories would be perfect. I'll help you cook."
They moved to the kitchen and began preparing the meal. Once they had eaten the rest of the evening was spent chattering idly about unimportant matters and avoiding dangerous subjects such as love or vermin.
Kyoko yawned herself awake early the next morning but couldn't bring herself to leave the snugness of her bed immediately. Her mind had been too full to get much sleep and luckily she had no reason to get up at all today unless she wanted to. She was supposed to go to school though she and everyone else had decided it might be prudent for her to avoid going out in public without an escort unless she absolutely had to for the time being. She dearly wished for an end to her imprisonment, even if it was for her own protection.
Eventually Kanae awoke too and she could no longer justify her laziness. She rose to cook her friend a breakfast packed with gratitude and enjoyed a couple of hours of her company until Kanae had to leave for a drama shoot.
Sai had returned in the early hours so they left the apartment as quietly as possible to prevent waking her. Kyoko went with her to the ground floor where they paused to say goodbye at the front entrance, and she watched until her friend was out of sight.
She glanced up at the security camera before heading back up and felt a wave of reassurance. The building usually required a code to allow admittance, though it was the idea that there was always a guard on duty to watch the monitors to the main door, back door and the entrance to the underground car park that gave her the feeling of safety.
The guard also had the option to open or lock out either door or the car park barrier – apparently Ren had made sure she'd be able to get in after the first time she had gone there – and he only had three things to monitor unlike at LME, which beeped every time one of the entrances was used. It wasn't as sophisticated as LME, but there was a certain strength in the simplicity. This building was the only place left where she felt safe, and even then she felt a tinge of unease when she didn't have a locked door between her and the corridors.
She rode the elevator back up to Sai's apartment and took out her schoolbooks. If she couldn't go in person she felt she should study as best she could here. Her mind was still too full to really concentrate though and she ended up staring at the same pages without absorbing the words for endless minutes. She threw down her pen in frustration as she reread the same passage on cellular respiration for the sixth time without becoming any more enlightened on the subject then jumped as her phone vibrated on the table.
For a moment she panicked, thinking it might be Ren, and breathed a sigh of relief as she found the caller ID was unknown. She picked it up and got halfway through a polite greeting when she was cut off by a stream of abuse.
"What do you want Sho?" she whisper-shouted at the unwelcome caller. They had a short and rather unpleasant conversation which revealed that hatemail had arrived that morning for Sho and Mimori at Akitoki. She managed to get out of him that the letters had come through the post and contained simple threats to stay away from Natsu or face the consequences in block capitals and that they had already been sent to the police. It became necessary to hang up before she started yelling soon after that.
Seconds after she hit the disconnect button, the phone vibrated again with an incoming call from an unknown caller. Sho's voice rang out loudly from the device and she fought to hold down her temper. She stayed on the line just long enough to tell him to be careful and pass this advice on to Mimori before hanging up.
The phone went off again and Kyoko growled.
"Stop calling me you moron!" she shouted and hung up on his outraged spluttering. She stabbed at the buttons going through her contact list to find someone, anyone, else to dial so he would get a busy signal next time. She didn't like to turn the thing off and honestly a study break would probably do her good to calm her down. Her finger paused as Ren's name was highlighted, but shook her head and moved on. She scrolled to Hiyama Atsuko and bit her lip before hitting the call button, just in time as her phone flashed with an incoming call alert. It didn't vibrate though and she happily ignored it.
"Hello, Kyoko?" Hiyama's voice said after a few rings.
"Hi, I'm sorry if I'm disturbing you, is this a bad time?"
"No, actually it's perfect timing. Madoka's driving me crazy – well, she was anyway. She went out on a date and wouldn't shut up about it for a whole hour before she ran off. Met her after work and took her to a fancy restaurant apparently – she's already started planning the wedding and thought up names for their children. Tch! She didn't even bring me an apple today."
Kyoko grimaced and tried to steer the conversation away from anything romantic. "I hope you're not too bored, has your orderly been keeping you amused?"
"Oh... he's not mine." Hiyama said in a coy tone and Kyoko sighed. "Um, but yes, he forgot to hand in the latest instalment fee for his course and its due before noon today. His housemate's working the late shift so he had to wake him up to beg him to drop it off at his school. Apparently he's done it too many times before though and this time he had to promise to do all the housework for a week. He was nearly in tears when he told me, said he thinks the vacuum cleaner is haunted by the souls of all the spiders its sucked up and he tie-dyed half his wardrobe pink the last time he attempted laundry."
She laughed and shook her head. "That doesn't bode well. Pink of all colours."
"Yep. Oh yeah! Good news, they say I should be able to go home next week. You should come visit after I make my escape."
Kyoko smiled. "That's great! I will."
"I won't be sorry to leave this hospital food behind. First thing I'm going to do is order take-out. Lots of take-out. Calories be damned. Meh, I think I've lost weight since I've been here anyway. Oh, it looks like the doctors want to inspect me again so I have to go."
They said goodbye and Kyoko hung up to find she had six missed calls. Hopefully Sho had given up by now and she put her phone down on the table as she got back to cellular respiration, shooting it the odd suspicious glare every now and then.
The stalker must have mailed the letters yesterday, inferring he'd had to find out where to send them. Given that Sho was one of the biggest stars of Akitoki it didn't bode well for the theory he was an employee of some sort. She sighed decided at least Mimori and the idiot might be relatively safe for the moment and tried to get back to studying.
Her thoughts kept wandering and she had made little progress through the huge biology book by the time she heard Sai moving around and running a shower just after midday. Just as she was about to get lunch started, her phone vibrated.
She picked it up and glared as the unknown number message flashed. Sai was awake now so she felt no particular need to be keep her voice down and with this in mind she answered it with an instant, furious tirade.
She unleashed all the pent up frustrations in her possession and was actually starting to feel better until a soft chuckle silenced her. It wasn't Sho.
"So feisty, I like that. It's good to hear your voice Natsu."
Kyoko froze, just barely keeping hold of the phone in her suddenly numb fingers as the voice of oiled silk washed over her, clogging up her senses. "H-how did you get this number?"
"That's not important. I called because I wanted to apologise, I overreacted and did something to upset you. I've still got plans for that awful woman but I see now I should have trusted you. No relationship can work if one doesn't trust the other."
"We don't have a relationship!" she snarled in frustration.
"Of course we do, you said so yourself. If a man sent you twelve red roses with the thorns still on you'd fall in love with him. I've been sending them just like you wanted."
"I never said any such thing! I don't know what you're talking about!"
"Oh? Well, maybe it was the other you but that really doesn't matter."
Kyoko leapt up to pace the room in anger and bewilderment. "The other me? There is no other me, you're insane and I want you to go away and leave me alone!"
A slippery chuckle teased her ears. "Don't be like that, not when I have my apology gift all ready for you. It's actually been easier to follow you since you started taking a car everywhere, I lost track of you so many times on that bike, so I know where you're staying at the moment. I'm right outside so if you just come down-"
"Like hell!" she roared with a newfound strength from his words – they actually brought as much comfort as anxiety. She reeled that he had her number and home address, but the fact that he was calling her and not knocking on the door raised her faith in the building's security. As long as she didn't do something stupid she was safe.
"Of course, I haven't given you all twelve roses yet so I can't expect too much. I'll just leave your present outside so come down and pick it up whenever you like. I can't wait to meet you in person, Natsu. I've been so patient already for so long, I don't think I can wait much longer. I'll come for you soon and we can be together again."
"Again? You're deluded!" she began, but found herself talking to a dial tone after a click. She put the phone down with shaking hands and hugged her arms around herself. She turned to check that the front door was bolted and nearly screamed as she found Sai in the doorway watching her quizzically as she towelled her hair. She was dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt but Kyoko wasn't all that concerned about her attire at this point in time. Quickly she explained the call twice, first in a way so garbled Sai couldn't understand her then again after taking a few deep breaths.
"I'll go down and look. You stay here and do not leave or open the door to anyone until I get back, okay?"
Kyoko nodded and watched as Sai left the apartment, drawing the deadbolt after she'd closed the door behind her. She moved to the couch and waited. The clock on the DVD player seemed to be broken, the minutes ticked by so slowly. The only sounds in the empty apartment were the soft twisting of fabric as she fidgeted with her skirt and the uneven breaths she forced in and out of her lungs.
Her phone vibrated and she actually cried out at the sudden and unnaturally loud noise. She reached for it cautiously and found it was a message from Sai rather than a call.
'I'm on a land line to the police – meet me outside, there's something you should see.'
A sinking feeling slowly spread out from her gut to consume her. She told herself it must be fine as long as Sai said so and made her way towards the door. She flinched at the sound of the deadbolt releasing and stepped out into the corridor, trying to walk normally as she headed for the elevator.
Time seemed to have sped up now and the ride down to the ground floor didn't seem to take as long as it usually did. The entrance hall was deserted and she shuffled towards the main doors with increasing unease.
She took out her phone again to double check the message and frowned as she looked it over again. Sai had only sent her a few texts before but never once so far had she bothered using apostrophes. And why would she be on a land-line to the police when she clearly had her mobile phone on her? A tongue of fear licked at the back of her neck, that same instinctive impulse to run before a predator that she had felt in the presence of the fake janitor at LME.
She peered out through the glass of the main doors but couldn't see anything suspicious even in broad daylight. She couldn't see Sai either though. As she changed her angle of view, something by the door caught her eye. A bundle of red roses tied into a bouquet with a sheet of plain white paper and a scarlet ribbon. There was a small card attached to the ribbon and she could see from here it read 'Sorry Natsu, I will see you soon to make it up to you' in a looping script.
The bouquet might as well have been a poisonous snake for the reluctance with which she reached for it. She reeled as she counted five roses in the bundle, so much so that the sound of the door opening made her scream. An elegant lady in a long faux-fur coat glared back at her and let out a demure huff before striding away to the elevator.
She would normally have apologised, but the sudden realisation that the roses had been on this side of the door overwhelmed her usual politeness. She took a final look around the entrance hall and out of the window and bolted for the elevator, bouquet still clutched in her hand.
Kyoko pressed the button, but the woman in the coat had taken it to one of the top floors. She shivered as she waited, strangely aware of an array of tiny sounds that she was sure hadn't been there before. She had to get back to the apartment.
Her breath caught in her throat as something that might have been the footfalls of a man reached her ears. The stairs. She was fast and she could probably outrun an attacker in a footrace. Another sound that might have been a footstep propelled her through the double-doors to the stairwell and she sprinted up taking them three at a time.
She ran flat out, grabbing onto the railing to swing herself round when she reached a landing until her lungs felt like they were about to burst. As she made the last turn towards the last flight her foot shot out from under her and she shrieked as she tumbled backwards. She threw the bouquet over her head as her arms flailed, and let out a grunt of pain at the moment her flesh met the concrete steps.
Falling down the stairs was as unpleasant as she remembered, and this time she had the added joy of her head connecting soundly with the railing at the bottom. Her vision blurred and the last thing she saw before unconsciousness claimed her was a red snowfall of fluttering rose petals.
Author's note: thank you for reading and reviewing, I'm kinda overwhelmed! :) I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I can – not too much more to go now :)