CHAPTER THIRTEEN

"I'm gonna change my ways of doin' things around here. I'm turnin' over a new leaf, gonna get myself in gear. 'Cause I've got a woman who's better than most and I've made a mess of her plans. Startin' today, all I'm gonna be is her man." – Gary Allen, 'Her Man'

HARVEY, FLASHBACK

"How someone could possibly eat a hot dog with so many onions on it is beyond me," Gordon chuckled, handing the food to Harvey before dropping into the seat beside him. "Did I miss anything?"

"Only a ground rule double that was the result of a very questionable call by the ump," Harvey grumbled, taking a large bite out of his hot dog. He pushed his Yankees cap further up on his head so that he could better see the score board. "Three more innings, just have to hold them for three more."

They ate in amicable silence for a while, neither saying much as they watched the game play out for another inning or so. Harvey periodically pulled his phone from his pants, checking it every so often for any missed emails or texts. He wasn't surprised to see that everything was quiet thus far, Donna was great at keeping the troops at bay when she knew he had prior commitments with his father or brother. Speaking of Donna… he found that he kind of missed her. It wasn't too often that they spent a whole weekend apart, work frequently infiltrating even that sacred time. He sighed, wishing, for the first time in his life, that the baseball game would hurry up and be over.

Gordon glanced at him after he looked down at the phone for the third or fourth time. "You know, if you just called her it'd save us both the headache of watching you mope over there."

Harvey shot his head up at his father's words and he shoved the phone back into the pocket of his jeans, a slow blush coming to cover his face.

"I'm just watching for any emails or texts from work, want to make sure I don't miss anything important," he scrambled to explain. The excuse sounded weak, even to him.

Gordon rose an eyebrow, giving his son a knowing look. "Uh huh. And you've got a perfectly capable assistant that is handling all of that. I think it's the assistant that you're hoping to hear from, not your clients."

Harvey rolled his eyes but didn't respond. He knew any further excuses would fall on deaf ears. Unfortunately, he also knew that his father was not going to drop his interrogation.

"How is Donna, by the way? I haven't seen her for a few weeks now, not since we all went out to dinner for my birthday at Houlihan's," Gordon commented, trying to play the question off as nothing.

Harvey again rolled his eyes. "She's great, Dad. Nothing new to report on."

"Well that's your own fault," Gordon commented, cutting right to the chase. "Never thought my own son would be such a sissy."

Harvey straightened in his seat and reached for his beer. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about, Harvey," Gordon admonished. "Your brother is married now, has a kid on the way. Don't you think it's about time that you started down that path as well? I've seen the way you and Donna look at each other. I just don't understand why you haven't taken that step?"

Harvey sighed and decided to be honest. "I… I tried once," he slowly admitted. "But she has this rule-"

"The only reason women have rules is because they're afraid of getting their hearts broken," Gordon broke in, cutting him off. He reached over to gently pat Harvey's shoulder. "Show her that she's got nothing to be afraid of."

Harvey, again, chose to remain silent, staring out at the baseball diamond in front of them. He and Donna had so much history between them, could he afford to risk everything for something more? Was something more even what she truly wanted? Or himself? He wasn't sure.

"Don't wait too long, Harv. I'd like to see some red-headed grandchildren in my near future," Gordon said, breaking him from his thoughts. He turned back towards the game, diverting their attention away from the heaviness of their conversation. Reaching for the peanuts on Harvey's lap he tossed a few at his son playfully. "Alright, enough with the mushy talk. Whatcha think about Jeter this year? He have any chance of defending that golden glove award?"

HARVEY, PRESENT DAY

He had always imagined that their first kiss would be completely consuming, all passion and emotion. He thought that they would probably imploded with the release of the hot and thick tension that had slowly built up between them over the years. That was not what happened, though.

The kiss started almost unbearably fragile, as if both were too afraid to move, fearing that even the slightest adjustment would send the other fleeing for the hills. A spike of sensation washed over him at the contact. The spark that had ignited at the simple touch of their hands seemed like a dim candle compared to the current of electricity now running through their bodies. Their gentle kiss soon began to increase with pressure and he found that he was weak at her touch.

Donna grabbed onto him, desperately trying to buoy them against the turbulence of emotions that had suddenly been set free. Time seemed to stop and Harvey was unsure how long they sat there, locked in their embrace. After what was most likely only a matter of a few seconds, he suddenly felt her fully register him. In that moment, the outer wave of their storm pressed in on them, years of pent up emotions and every growing tension lapped at them like waves from separate storms, amplifying each other until it was almost too much.

Donna was the first to break their kiss, slowly backing away. Harvey opened his eyes to watch as her eyelashes shutter open in amazed shock. A warm blush filled her cheeks and he could do nothing more than watch and wait for her reaction. He felt powerless but knew that in this instant, she needed to be the one in charge. She needed to direct the ship.

"Harvey… I…," Donna stuttered, suddenly unable to meet his gaze. She raked a hand through her hair and tried again. Smiling softly, she reached out to touch the stubble that had grown on his cheeks over the past few days, finally locking her eyes back on his. "That was… nice."

Harvey smiled and reached up to interlock their fingers. "It was," he conceded, feeling stupid at not having a better response.

Donna took a deep breath before continuing. "But there's a lot that we need to talk about. I don't want to just dive head first into this."

Harvey nodded. "We'll discuss everything, Donna. I just- I'm tired of pretending… you know? I'm tired of acting like you're nothing more than a friend when every relationship I've ever had up until this point has always been compared to 'this', even when 'this' never truly existed. I just want… you."

He heard Donna suck in her breath, his raw admission catching her off guard. She didn't say anything, just letting the heaviness of the moment they'd shared permeate the space between them. After a moment, she finally turned away and slowly climbed to her feet, wiping her hands down her legs as she moved. Harvey felt his own palms start to turn sweaty and his breaths come in short, erratic pulls. Was she running? Had all of this been too much?

As if she could read his thoughts, Donna turned back, a warm smile stretching across her face as she extended a hand to help him to his feet. Harvey accepted her help, and was surprised to feel the same shock of electricity spark between them at the touch. He had assumed that by finally opening the dam of emotions, that their connection would have waned. Boy, was he wrong.

He rose uncertainly to his feet and once standing, attempted to reluctantly release Donna's hand. She didn't let go, though. Instead, she tugged softly at his hand, pulling him closer so that she could wrap him in a soft hug. He released a breath that he hadn't realized he'd been holding and buried his face into the crook of her neck, returning the embrace until he was certain that he was on the brink of crushing her. Donna didn't complain, though.

They stayed, locked in their hug, for moments until Donna finally pulled back. Reaching up with both hands, she gently cradled Harvey's face, forcing him to look at her.

"I want you to know that I'm not running from this, Harvey," Donna said quietly. "I do want this… I want us. But… I want to make sure that we do this right. There are- no, there were many reasons for my rule; reasons that I want to explain. You mean too much to me for us to not have an open and candid conversation about the future. Because… once we go there- there's no going back."

Harvey, again, felt himself smiling, whether that was from her confession of wanting to give them a try or from the release of the unknowns that had been grappling at his emotions for the past few moments, he wasn't sure. He reached up one hand to gently take one of hers and brought it down to press a soft kiss to her knuckles.

"I understand, Donna. I want to do this the right way, as well. And you're not the only one with some explaining to do. Let's just… take this slow, ok?"

Donna nodded, the tension instantly flowing from her body at his words. At that moment, everything finally felt right. He felt like he could breathe again, knowing that they were ok, that they were on the same page. Just then, Harvey's stomach let out a loud grumble and Donna couldn't stop the soft laugh that escaped from her mouth.

"Right now, I say we get some food. God, I think we might have been down here for years."

"Here you are, 'macaronis au fromage'," Donna said, presenting him with his plate of food before joining him on the couch with her own plate balanced on her hand.

Harvey let out a laugh as he took in his dinner. "Mac'n'cheese? You made it sound… I don't know, more exotic."

Donna chuckled and stabbed at the noodles before her, taking a large bite before responding. "Hey, I'll have you know that macaroni and cheese is a dish made for kings. Besides, it's pasta and every foodie knows that all good pastas come from France so… it is exotic!"

Harvey rolled his eyes, knocking a shoulder playfully against hers before turning and shoveling a large forkful into his mouth. He almost groaned at the taste, not fully realizing how hungry he was up until that moment. Donna may not be a world-renown chef, but at that moment he didn't care.

In no time at all, he had cleared his plate and was happily scooping the left over cheese onto his finger. He glanced towards Donna and noticed that she'd eaten most of her plate but was left staring into the remains of her dinner, lost in thought.

"You alright?" He asked quietly, pushing his plate onto the coffee table before them. Donna sighed but nodded. She glanced towards him and gave him a small smile as reassurance.

"Just thinking about going back to New York," she admitted, flicking her gaze to the fire burning in front of them. "About everyone back there and what they'll think… what they'll say. It's petty, I know but…"

Harvey let out his own sigh and reached forward to remove her dish and take her hands in his. "I don't care what they'll think. All I care about is you. I do care about what they'll say, mostly because I'm afraid of it hurting you. But I know that you can take care of yourself."

Donna smiled at that. "I can. I certainly did with Daniel Hardman."

Harvey let out a sharp laugh at the memory. "That you did. I have nothing to worry about," he answered.

He reached for her then, his movement questioning, almost as if he wasn't quite sure that he was allowed to touch her. Donna nipped his uncertainty in the bud. She curled her feet underneath her and pulled at his arm, pulling it tightly across her until they were both pressed up against each other. He let himself finally relax at the contact and both turned to stare into the fire before them. Harvey found himself enjoying the moment between them, almost unable to believe that they were finally in a place where they could touch so freely. He glanced towards the large picture windows facing the front side of the cabin and burrowed his brows with concern. He raised the arm holding Donna slightly to read his watch and then flicked his eyes back towards the window. Donna glanced up at him in question.

"The snow's not letting up," Harvey answered, pointedly staring out the window until she turned to look as well. "I think we got another four to six inches tonight and if it keeps at this pace, we might get the same before morning."

Donna tensed in concern. "Do you think it'll be alright to drive back in?"

Harvey shrugged, honestly not sure. "I don't know. I guess we'll have to reevaluate in the morning."

He turned away from the scene outside and lifted his feet to rest atop the coffee table, dropping his head back against the couch cushions at the same time.

Donna suddenly giggled and he felt the reaction reverberate through him, forcing his own crooked grin. "What?"

Donna shook her head, turning back to rest against his shoulder and stared off into the fire. "Nothing, I just thought about you having to shovel snow. I don't think you've ever been accustomed to having to do so much manual labor before in your life. Look where it's already gotten you. You're practically down to one leg."

Harvey grinned, turning to dig his fingers softly into her sides, almost tickling her. "Or you could shovel? I've always been attracted to a woman who isn't afraid to take charge."

Donna nudged him. "Nah, you've spent too much money on my manicure for me to mess these nails up by shoveling the driveway. Guess we'll have to just take our chances."

Harvey smiled lightly and reached for the hand closest to him, lacing their fingers. He rested their hands on his stomach and gently caressed his thumb over hers.

"I guess we will." One thing that he was certain of, he was truly happy about the chances they were currently taking.

Hopefully this was the chapter that everyone's been waiting for! I put a lot of thought into how I wanted their first kiss to go because I don't see it as being easy, they have a lot to deal with still. Anyway, I'd love to hear your thoughts! Thanks for reading!

Oh, and P.S., I've received a few reviews commenting on the chapters being too short. I'll apologize for this to an extent but I feel that if I made them longer, I'd start combining chapters and this story would be over before you knew it. I like to keep my chapters short and to the point, with each one have a different agenda. I actually write everything in Microsoft Word and all of my chapters have been 5-6 pages long, I think that's a pretty reasonable length. Sorry for the honesty but hey, if you've come this far, you must like the story and you might as well keep reading ;) Much love!