Note:
Chapter 13, Biting the Bullet
Embry's POV
As soon as I got off the phone with Ava, I ran to the beach. I didn't know how long she'd be, or whether or not, despite what she said, the leech would let her come. But I couldn't wait in my house for even five minutes – I would go crazy, for sure. So I wanted to wait for her at our meeting place. Even there, I found no ease. I was jumpy, edgy and tweaked. Every sound had me jumping – I couldn't sit still for more than a second – I had to move.
I was just finished throwing my arsenal of rocks out into the sea when I heard a shuffling out in the forest behind me. I didn't look around, though – only flinched for a moment, until I caught the scent of one of my brothers. Jacob. I rolled my eyes, and went back to my pacing.
I was right. Moments later, Jacob came out of the forest, hands in his jean pockets, walking over to me casually. I waited for him to reach me patiently.
"Hey." He nodded at me, standing at my side, turning to stare out at the sea like me. "What're you doing?"
"Waiting for Ava." I replied promptly, turning towards him slightly. "I told her to meet me here. We kind of need to talk."
"What about?" his eyes flashed to mine.
None of your business! My mind screamed, but I grit my teeth and replied with a more polite answer.
"I'm gonna tell her. About me. About us. And then I'm going to tell her I've imprinted on her – and then make her choose."
Jacob looked at me, his eyes wide.
"Make her choose?" he repeated, insulting astonishment in his voice. "You're kidding, right? Dude – don't do this to yourself."
I frowned, puzzled.
"What do you mean?"
"She's WITH the vampire, Embry." Jacob shook his shaggy head. "There is no 'choosing'."
I grunted.
"Well, I have to know, Jacob. I can't stop thinking about this – and it's killing me. At least, maybe if I heard the words out of her mouth, that she doesn't want me – that she'll never want me, I can start to get over her."
Jacob rolled his eyes.
"It won't work, Embry. I know it won't."
I turned on him fiercely.
"How could you possibly KNOW it won't, Jacob?"
"Because the situation is similar to the one I had with Bella. You can't get over someone you love. Especially your imprint, Embry. This won't work, and it will only hurt you worse. Don't do this, please."
I stood my ground.
"No, I'm going to do it, no matter what. This is unhealthy; me loving her like this, when she has no idea, and is off with a ghoul. I have to do this, for me. Please, just go Jacob."
He looked at me for ten very long seconds, before shaking his head, sighing.
"Alright man. It's your decision, I guess."
"It is." I confirmed.
He nodded.
"Okay. Good luck."
He pat me on the back, before retreating back into the forest, towards his home.
I thought back to what he said, and realization started to hit me. What if he was right? What if this only made it worse? I couldn't imagine feeling worse than I already was, but it was possible. What if she did reject me and the pain only grew? What if this didn't help me at all?
I shook my head firmly. No. I couldn't believe that. I had to hope for the best, and dive in with positive thoughts. Or as positive as possible, considering what it was about.
A few more minutes passed, before I heard an engine close by, and a sudden halt. I didn't turn around, but merely waited. I inhaled a large lungful of air, and then released it.
Time to bite the bullet.
Ava's POV
I pulled my mustang up in the same parking lot as the night of the bonfire. I shuddered as I recalled the painful memory, the one I tried desperately to block out of my mind for good. I turned away from the lot and looked out towards the sea. Embry was already there, of course. I put my hands in the pockets of my jacket, and slowly trudged out into the sand.
He didn't turn around, but I had a feeling he knew I was there. It wasn't until I reached him that he turned around, and greeted me with a timid smile.
"Hey." He said quietly, leaning down to kiss my cheek. I let him.
"Hi." I responded, my voice matching his volume.
I waited for him to speak again. He didn't look like he wanted to – in fact, he rather looked like he was being tortured. I frowned slightly, before speaking myself, to relieve his pain.
"It looks like it's going to rain." I indicated towards the grey, cloudy skies. The weather – always a safe subject. He arched an eyebrow slightly, looking up at the sky briefly, before looking back to me. He nodded his head.
"Yeah, it will."
I nodded. There was silence again – awkward, drawn-out silence. I sighed, becoming irritated.
"Embry, what did you need to talk to me about?"
He seemed shocked with my abruptness, but he soon recovered – his expression changed to pain and indecision, as if contemplating whether or not he should tell me. This must be bad. I started to worry.
"Embry… just tell me, please." I made my voice soft, and gentle, to assure him I wouldn't get mad or upset, no matter what he said "You can trust me."
He sighed a shaky sigh, before closing his eyes. He was silent again, until he opened his eyes.
"Remember… at the bonfire?"
I understood immediately. He wanted to tell me what Jasper had already confirmed.
"Oh, Embry." I sighed, smiling slightly. "You saved me, I know. And I know about you, and Sam, and Jacob, and everyone else…"
He froze, with pure shock evident all over his face. His hair blew in the breeze – the only thing of him that moved. The silence wasn't so annoying this time – just deafening. It made me uneasy. I shifted my weight.
"He… told you?" he gasped.
I nodded.
"Yes. You're werewolves."
He seemed relieved, shocked, pissed off, afraid, guilty and amazed all at the same time. I held back my giggle. I couldn't believe anyone could feel all that at once – they'd probably explode. But Embry managed.
But I snickered anyway.
His eyes only widened.
"He told you we were WEREWOLVES, and you're LAUGHING?!" he practically shouted, looking at me as if I were insane. I just nodded, not even so much as a flinch came out of me.
"Well, I kind of suspecting you guys weren't human. At first, it was a bit of a joke, you know – 'You're not normal'" I used my fingers for air quotations. "In a playful way. And then Jasper told me about him being a vampire, and my suspicions became more serious. I mean, you guys run around practically naked all the time, even though it's FREEZING cold, and you manage to be warm. REALLY warm. I wouldn't have guessed werewolf, though. But I honestly wasn't surprised when Jasper told me. I don't think he liked that very much."
Embry started laughing. I smiled up at him. He seemed thrilled and even psyched that I didn't mind him being a werewolf – and he didn't even have to tell me. In a quick, snake-strike movement, he embraced me. I sniggered and hugged him back. Again, even though he was half-naked, he was burning. I pat his back feebly.
But what happened next was what shocked me, and changed everything between me and Embry. He pulled back, I thought he was going to let me go, but he didn't. Instead, he moved his hands from around me, to my face, and he pressed his scorching lips against mine.
I was so shocked; I didn't even realize what happened at first. But when my senses kicked up again, and I tried to pull back from him. He let me go as soon as he felt me struggle. I wiped my lips – all the blood had rushed to them, and it left them swollen and throbbing. They ached. He kissed me with such intensity; I wouldn't have been surprised if he'd actually burnt me.
He seemed relieved, somehow, and dazed. He was looking at me adoringly. I jerked back from him further, keeping a good three feet between us. I was gasping, and I wanted to get away from him. I tried telling myself that that didn't just happen, that a part of my brain made it up – the one with the sick sense of humor.
I turned and started to walk back to my car.
"Wait!" I heard Embry say, and he was in front of me in a second. He put his arms out to stop me from walking. I stopped, and twisted out of his arms. My heart pounded so hard it hurt – I didn't want to listen to anything he had to say. I was on fire, and I was still in shock – I wanted to go home and curl up with Jasper. Jasper, and his ice-cold touch, and his body, and his kisses didn't hurt – they were like feathers on my lips. That's what I wanted. I didn't want this.
But I looked at him anyway.
He took in my expression, and his changed to apologetic.
"Ava, I'm so sorry." He whispered. "But I need to explain to you how I feel-"
I cut him off.
"I think you've already made that clear, Embry. Now, if you'll excuse me, I wanted to go home-"
"No, wait!" he turned me to face him again. "You don't understand. Please let me explain."
I didn't want to hear it, but I knew, even though he probably didn't deserve it, I should. I swallowed back my anger and confusion, as I looked back up at him, clearing my expression. I nodded once.
"Obviously your leech didn't explain this." He gritted his teeth together. "We werewolves, we have this thing – it used to be very rare, but it's common now. When we meet someone – a girl – it could be anyone in the whole wide world, any random stranger – but as soon as you lock eyes with that girl, you imprint. It's like… like soul mates. Stronger than love at first sight. And that werewolf is bound to you forever."
Oh, no…
"Embry…" I choked out. "Did… did you… imprint… on ME?"
He stood very still for a few seconds, before he nodded.
A cinderblock hit me in the head. Not literally, but it certainly felt like it. The shock was all over my face, I could tell. I wasn't even making an effort to conceal some of it – it was all there.
"Is… what… how…?" I stuttered, having no idea what to say.
"And this is why I called you down here. I'm in love with you, Ava. You're my imprint, you're my soul mate. And I wish I wasn't, just so this wasn't hurting you, but I didn't have a choice. Werewolves can't CHOOSE their imprints. But you offer me the best chance to pass on the werewolf gene, and… naturally… you're supposed to be mine."
"Embry…" I replied, my voice cracked and even hurt. "I'm sorry, I love you, but you're my best friend… I love Jasper, completely. Every part of me belongs to him. I can't… this is Bella all over again."
I put a hand over my mouth, tears threatening my eyes.
"I'm NOT Bella, Embry. I don't believe in being in love with two people at once. I think it's wrong. If you love someone, you should only love one, and give yourself to that person, unconditionally and completely. You shouldn't tear yourself in two, and only offer one half. The one you love deserves better than that. So I'm sorry…" the tears were coming now. "We can't be soul mates, because I belong with Jasper."
A tear dropped from Embry's eye, and I felt worse. I wanted to die, it was that strong. Then I couldn't hurt anyone. I wanted to be alone – that's how I deserved to be. I was drowning in my guilt. I let out a small whimper, as my tears fell.
He spoke next. He shook his head, his voice quiet.
"You can't BELONG with the vampire, Ava. Think about it – in a world, if we didn't have vampires or werewolves, I would be the one you ended up with. Because Jasper would have died back in the 1800s, in the war."
I thought of that, and it made me sob. I didn't want to think of me not knowing Jasper, of him dying in the war, instead of becoming a vampire and being here with me now. It hurt all too much. I childishly wanted to sit on the ground, with my hands over my ears, and cry, rocking back and forth, refusing to get up and demanding that he get Jasper to come and get me.
But I couldn't act like that. It wasn't Embry's fault. Like he said – it was a pull, a force. He didn't have a choice. I couldn't get angry with Embry.
I bit down on my lip.
"Well, apparently, we live in a world where vampires and werewolves DO exist. And I fell in love with Jasper, on my own. I didn't have a pull, or force guiding me to him. I know I'm his singer, but he loves me on his own too. He could have eaten me, for crying out loud. But he didn't. Instead, he chose to love me. And I chose to love him back. This thing you said… this imprinting… it's not right. People should choose who they fall in love with; there should be no force, nothing like that. And I'm sorry, Embry… that you imprinted on me."
He looked like he'd just been punched in the face, at my last line.
"I'm not." He whispered. "And yes, the imprinting played a part in me falling in love with you. That's what drew me to you to begin with. But I love how you are – how you act, and how you smile. I love your laugh, and your voice is comforting to me-"
"Stop…" I murmured, but he ignored me.
"I love the way you smell, the way you make my heart pound whenever you're near me. I'm completely in love with you, Ava, imprinting or not. And I want you to choose me. I can offer you things Jasper can't."
I suddenly became angry. I tried to downplay it, but I couldn't help the dark look that crawled onto my face as I looked back up at him.
"Like what?" I asked icily.
"Plenty of things!" Embry said loudly, raising his hands in the air and letting them fall back at his legs. "For starters, I wouldn't want to eat you – you could bleed around me, even by accident, and I wouldn't have to hold my breath and use every ounce of my strength not to kill you. I could hold you in the winter, in rain, and make you warm and not freeze you to death."
He reached down and gently brushed my wet cheek.
"I could make love to you without worrying about crushing you to a pulp in the process. We could kiss properly – and not cautiously, in fear that you'll swallow venom. I can offer you children, and a proper life. You wouldn't have to become anything for me. I could give offer you sunshine, and not the darkness."
"What do you want me to say?" I shrieked at him, jerking away. Anger was overflowing now, and I couldn't stop it. "Embry, you're my BEST FRIEND. You SAVED my life! I can never thank you enough, but I can't be happy without Jasper. I can't see myself with anyone else but him. I need you to respect that!"
"I can't do that." He was getting angry now too. "It's sick, you know. You loving a parasite. It has NO soul, Ava! These things can't LOVE you! They were built and designed to EAT people. Just because Doctor Carlisle Cullen and his family of ticks are on a leash, doesn't mean that leash can't break."
"Stop it, Embry." I demanded.
"He would eat you alive, Ava. I would never dream of hurting you, but he could. And I'll bet you he does."
"STOP IT!" I yelled.
"NO!" He yelled back, taking a hold of my shoulders. He shook me violently, giving me a head rush. "You NEED to hear this, Ava. You were bitten by vampires, just the other night. You felt the poison, and you experienced how it felt. How would you feel, if that was your beloved vampire doing that to you? Only he wasn't so generous, and he decided to kill you, rather than have you around for eternity? What would you feel, in those last moments, while the leech you love sucking the life out of you?"
His words stung me, like I'd been stabbed.
"All I can give him is my life." I whispered, tears coming down in waterfalls this time. I shrugged my shoulders sheepishly "And if that's what he wants, he can have it."
He jerked away from me and made a disgusted sound. His eyes were full of hatred, whether it was towards me or the Cullens, I did not know. I probably should have run to my car, but my legs refused to move. I stared at him with wide eyes.
His whole body violently jerked, and he yelled out in pain, falling to the ground. The spasms rocked his whole frame. He cried out in pain again,
"Embry!" I cried, falling to my knees to see what was wrong. I reached and touched his shoulder, but jerked back, letting out a yelp of surprise. It was like I'd been burnt and electrocuted at the same time. I couldn't touch him. I could just watch, and hope he'd be okay. I had no idea what was going on, and I was panicked.
I screamed for help.
"HELP!" I screamed my bloodcurdling scream, the same one I'd used on this beach over twenty four hours ago. "HELP US, PLEASE!"
"Embry!" I turned back to him. Despite the tremor it put through me, I put my arms around him from behind, pressing against his back. "Please, please be okay! Embry!"
And suddenly, Embry let out an animalistic roar, and beneath me, I felt fur. Grey fur. I looked down, and gasped. Embry was a werewolf, an angry one at that… and I was on his back.
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Jasper's POV
As soon as my house came into view, I could sense something was wrong. Ava's car wasn't in the driveway anymore, and I instantly became irritated. I stormed into the house. I'd asked ONE favor of the female members of my family, and that was to make sure Ava stayed put, where we could keep an eye on her. They couldn't even do that. I knew she wasn't here – I couldn't hear a heartbeat for miles.
"Where is she?" I roared as someone came around the corner – I didn't even look to see who it was. To my satisfaction, I saw it was Alice. She squeaked at my tone, but looked at me apologetically.
"Sorry, Jasper. She said she wanted to go and visit somebody. And we can't just hold her against her will."
I could tell she was hiding something from me – she wasn't lying, just leaving something out. My blood ran cold in my veins, and suspicion crept up on me.
"Who did she go see?" My voice was low, dangerous. And Alice looked genuinely terrified.
"Embry… in La Push."
I growled.
"Great. After you heard me, specifically say, that I would not allow her near those werewolves until they could prove they could take care of her? What is WRONG with you, Alice?"
She flinched, and backed off one step.
"I… I…"
I was about to continue shouting (and would have taken great pleasure in doing so) but Rosalie suddenly burst through the door, twigs and leaves all in her hair. She looked terrified. Her eyes searched the room, and she found me. She sprinted over to me, and grabbed a hold of my shirt.
"I… was hunting…" Was she panting? How fast did she run? "Near the La Push border. I heard… I heard…"
She shuddered.
"I heard Ava scream, Jasper. It was horrible. I wanted to go and get her, but we aren't allowed in. And then I heard a werewolf howl, and she screamed louder…"
I was empty. I couldn't feel, I couldn't think. My mind was on the brink of exploding – and so was my patience. And my reason. And my mercy. I howled, a feral, vicious snarling erupted from me. All I could see was red. I was beyond pissed off – no word could describe my emotion.
I looked at both Alice and Rosalie. Alice's face went blank for a moment, and then she gasped.
"Jasper! You can't!" Alice shouted. "They wouldn't HURT her! Embry wouldn't! And we aren't allowed in La Push – what about the treaty-?"
"Fuck the treaty!" I thundered back. "I'm going to La Push, whether they like it or not! Because either way, Ava is in trouble and I WILL NOT stand by and allow her to be harmed."
I raced out of the house at full vampire speed, towards La Push. A few seconds later, I sensed company. I looked around quickly. Emmett. Emmett was following me. I picked up the pace. There was no way I wasn't going to La Push. I was going to get Ava back, if I had to snap every single neck in the reservation.
Whoever was hurting her was going to die.
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YAY! Another chapter, done. I'm so proud of myself. This is the longest story I've written, I think (nods) so please read and review. You know you love me :D xo