revised may 14, 08
Disclaimer: don't own degrassi...
Chapter 13
"Do you have any questions before we start today, Alex?"
"No."
"Okay then, the last time you were here, we talked about how you were getting in trouble with other kids at school. So let's start from there."
"Okay."
"You said it made you feel better and less angry, Is that right?"
"Yeah."
"And stealing and fighting, did that help with the anger?"
"It did."
"Have you considered that your behavior was a result of how you felt because of the abuse that went on in your house?"
Alex just shrugged her shoulders.
"Well Alex, based on the results from the tests that we took earlier and what we've talked about so far, we have a fairly good idea about what's going on with you. You are suffering from what's called a secondary post-traumatic distress disorder."
Alex remained quiet as she tried to fathom what Dr. Hanson had just told her.
"Have you heard of it Alex?"
"Yeah, Ms. Sauvé explained it to us last year."
"Would you like me to explain it further?"
"I guess."
"Post-traumatic stress disorder is an anxiety disorder. This kind of medical disorder affects approximately 1 in 10 people. They are among the most common of mental health problems. The disorder can become so severe that the individual may find it difficult to lead a normal life. Before we go any further, do you have any questions Alex?"
"No, you can keep going Dr. H."
"Feel free to interrupt me any time, all right?"
He said before he continued,
"Post-traumatic stress disorder is caused by a psychologically traumatic event involving actual or threatened death or serious injury to oneself or others. Such triggering events are called 'stressors'; they may be experienced alone or while in a large group."
"…but I didn't have any of that, I mean, I have never even had a serious injury, let alone a near death experience…"
"Yes, that is why I referred to your case as a secondary one. Although, you may not have been a victim yourself of the physical trauma, you've definitely been confronted and have witnessed the traumatic events in your house, and your symptoms are the same as of a person who's been directly affected."
"Really, that can happen?"
Dr. Hanson nodded in reply.
"And what I feel now, because of last year, it's the same thing? 'cause it feels worse."
"Well, the initial stage of the trauma may have been your childhood when you witnessed your mom getting abused and that may have caused some depressive symptoms and anxiety in your childhood and during your adolescent years."
He stopped to take a breath and to make sure Alex was following him.
"And then there was a second stage where a similar traumatic incident or set of circumstances occurred that triggered the full-blown post-traumatic stress disorder."
"So what I have now is like the second stage of this disorder? …which feels worse?"
"I know its too much information Alex, to take all at once. I will give you some more information to read on this and you can call my office anytime if you have any questions, okay?"
"Yeah…"
Dr. Hanson then slowly explained to Alex the symptoms of what he thought she was suffering from…
"The abuse you experienced during your childhood may have made you prone from being angry, feeling guilty or feeling responsible for things that weren't your fault, to avoiding similar situations that made you feel that way. It may have put you on alert for the next blow and therefore more prone to injury, because of the 'emotional holding pattern'. In situations like this, people sometimes build a shell around themselves to protect themselves. It may very well have a hand in you showing aggression to others in the service of a cause that you thought was noble."
Alex had instantly thought of Rick and how at the time, she had presumed it to be okay to hurt him physically.
"The stealing and fighting were your methods of acting out to ease the anxiety that you felt."
Although, Dr. Hanson had been thorough, Alex still did not understand what she was feeling now.
"But it's not the anger that I feel now, it's something else. It's like I'm sick, but I know I'm not." Alex smiled at her own question, "Does this make any sense?"
"Most people suffering with this disorder may be less likely to let go of the emotional impact of the trauma while the somatic pattern may take form of physical illness such as headaches, tiredness or even clinical depression. Tell me, do you feel like you're not yourself or feel any of these symptoms like more tired, sleepy, less energetic than before or guilty …?"
"Yes, I do feel a bit all of these…"
Alex replied.
"Okay so you may be suffering from depression as a cause of the PTSD. The good news is that there is treatment available to help you with this. We will try to treat your depression first and any other symptoms that you might have as well. For PTSD, we will go with pills, talk therapy, group therapy or a combination of all. Do you think we should proceed Alex?"
"Yes, Dr. H."
This month, 'their' session was based on self-exploration.
Dr. Hanson had advised Alex to write her feelings down so they could explore them, understand them, live and face them. Whether it was anger, feelings of abandonment or any other fears, he wanted her to be aware of them and then instead of avoiding those feelings, deal with them.
He had explained to Alex that trying to adjust to them before understanding them could cause her frustration and more pain instead of relief.
Alex had heard his every word and had started keeping a journal where she wrote down all her unwanted emotions. This exercise had helped her getting an insight into their occurrences and had equipped her enough so she could respond to them appropriately and even control them.
Alex had surprised herself when after seeing Jen with another girl at the soccer field, she had not just gone and hit anybody instead she had remained calmed and had controlled her anger to some extent.
The changes in Alex were incomparable to how she had been just a year ago and Alex felt proud of how far she had come.
TBC
kindly Review... thanks for reading.