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Chapter 12

"Maa, maa, Hakuba!" Kaito attempted to placate the quietly raging Brit, "It'll be fine! There's absolutely nothing for you to worry about!"

"Kuroba, you are expected to go through the next Kid heist alongside your husband."

Kaito grinned, brightly gleeful. "I know! It's awesome!"

"Suddenly I feel very uneasy," Hakuba was eyeing him like he was expecting some sort of explosion.

A ball of paper bounced off Kaito's head before he could reply, "Aw…"

"Kaito, play nice," Shinichi scolded, kicking the door shut behind him and making his way across the roof to hand the magician a bento. "Don't worry about it, though, Hakuba-san. It's under control." He kicked the paper-ball several centimeters into the air and followed up by sending it back across the roof to the trash can set just outside the door.

"Your footwork is, as always, amazing, Shin-chan," Kaito observed.

Hakuba shook his head, "Do I want to know what you mean by 'under control'?"

Shinichi smirked, a muted echo of Kid's confidence, "Probably not."

"Right." Hakuba kneaded his forehead.

Kaito snickered.

Shinichi sighed, "Anyway, Hakuba, you might want to skip the next heist. Watch it on the news or from outside instead of actually showing up as a detective. It's liable to get… chaotic."

"You know, Kudo-san… I think I'll take your advice. I'm not sure I can handle Kuroba and Kid."

Kaito pouted, "Haku-chan! That's mean!"

Hakuba froze. "Haku-chan?"

Shinichi rolled his eyes heavenward in an exaggerated silent plea for patience. "Hakuba-san, don't even bother. It's a waste of breath."

The Brit stood up, snapping the lid onto his bento-box. "I'm leaving before I strangle him."

Kaito's pout grew by epic proportions as he watched his favorite teasing target flee his presence. "And I was just getting started, too…"

xxxx

Hakuba dropped into his seat and flopped across his desk, groaning tiredly and pressing his forehead against the cool wood. Kuroba was exhausting. Did the idiot have no concept of self-preservation!?

"Ano… Hakuba-kun? Are you all right?"

Hakuba sighed heavily and forced himself more upright, "I'm fine, Nakamori-san. Just tired and more than a little exasperated."

"Kaito again?" Nakamori smiled at him, "You should either ignore him or wave a picture of a fish at him."

"'Picture of a fish'?" Hakuba blinked, confused.

"He's afraid of fish."

"Ichthyophobic?" Possible defense against Kuroba, thank you, Nakamori. "How unexpected."

"Unless Kudo-kun's around," Nakamori conceded, "Kudo-kun seems to be able to calm him down, even in the face of fish." The girl went briefly starry-eyed, "It's adorable."

"I see," Hakuba considered. Despite the fact that no one—including the Nakamoris—seemed to have known that the Kudo and Kuroba families were apparently old friends, it seemed that Kuroba's previous implication that he and Kudo had known each other for quite some time was true. Granted, Hakuba had seen evidence pointing to that himself, but a good portion of what he'd seen (except the unknown non-verbal languages, which now occurred to him might be more an 'inter-family' thing than a 'friends' one) could be attributed to Kuroba's friendly nature and Kudo's media-vaunted ability to take anything in stride.

Being able to settle someone in the face of a phobia, though… that took personal familiarity that went both ways. So, final confirmation acquired. Moving on: Why had the two families kept their close ties a secret? And how? If the sons of those families knew each other so well as to completely account for each others strengths and weaknesses as well as anticipate each others actions and reactions accurately enough for the detective to turn around magic tricks and the magician to dodge assassin-level soccer balls, they had to have seen each other frequently, over long-term close-living, or both.

It was hard to hide that kind of thing from next door neighbors when one of those neighbors was a teenage girl who was a good friend. Teenage girls were notoriously snoopy, at least as much so as a detective, if often less skilled in their snooping. That Kuroba had been able to completely hide such a friend from her was… impressive.

That she didn't seem to find it at all suspicious was almost more so.

"Oi, Hakuba!"

Hakuba's forehead met his desk again. "Why aren't you still on the roof with your husband?" he asked without raising his head.

"Baka! What did you do to poor Hakuba-kun?"

"Nothing!" the protest was so perfectly Kuroba, innocent enough to proclaim guilt.

"Shin-chan!"

Oh, it sounded like Kudo had arrived. Possible reprieve.

"Ah! Two Kaitos!"

Nakamori's yelp made Hakuba raise his head. "Gah," he stared. One of them had to be Kudo. Had to be. Which, though, he hesitated to guess. "No. No. This is not happening."

The Kuroba in the hall folded his arms, mock-serious, "Kaito, what have you told me about picking on Hakuba?"

"That it's always better to do it more?"

Dear lord. Even their voices were the same.

The one in the doorway proper walked into the classroom, shaking his head vigorously before somehow ruffling his hair into order, his stance dropping back into Kudo's relaxed seriousness. "Sorry, Hakuba-san, I couldn't resist. After all the times we swapped schooldays while I was still in Teitan, I wanted to see what you'd do when faced with more than one Kaito."

Well. That explained how Kuroba had kept Kudo a secret—and presumably how Kudo had kept Kuroba one, too. If Aoko thought she was just seeing Kuroba himself… "I don't want to know. I really, really don't."

The one in the hall grinned and Hakuba spent a moment wondering whether it was really Kuroba or whether they had spontaneously swapped places. He then decided he probably wasn't going to be able to tell without fingerprints and DNA checks.

Then it occurred to him that he might not know which belonged to who to begin with, especially with the current Kudo's 'all the times we've swapped' comment. Not dealing with this, he decided and turned to face the whiteboard even though there were another thirteen minutes and forty-three seconds before lunch officially ended.

Footsteps indicated both of the banes of his existence had entered the classroom, "I think we broke him," Kuroba's voice mused.

"He'll be fine," Kudo's asserted, "He just needs some time to adjust."

Hakuba didn't want to adjust. He wanted those two to pick their own personalities and stick with them, not randomly shuffle! So long as they stuck with either one of each or two Kudos, he could probably deal, even if two Kudos would be surreal. More than fourteen seconds of two Kurobas would be mind-breaking.

"I guess that means I should give him a break for a while," Kuroba's voice sighed, "Ah, well. I'll have to find someone else to torment, today."

Really? Hakuba couldn't even work up any guilt over the relief he felt at that statement. "Oh, thank god."

Someone snickered. He didn't think it was Kuroba.

xxxx

"Three more days," Shinichi murmured, eyes on the calendar in the Kuroba house's kitchen.

"Hm?" Kaito glanced over, "Three more days? What do you—" Oh. Right. "What should we do?"

"Think one of your more pigeon-colored doves could record it? We can't stop the deal, obviously, but if we can start getting evidence…"

"Hm… Yeah, we know when and where. I could have Mei-chan roost on one of the windowsills, no problem. With a non-reflective coating and the night-vision camera, they shouldn't even notice."

"Good. Good," Shinichi closed his eyes for a long moment, "As for the rest of it… Maybe I can prevent the murder."

Murder. Kaito had almost forgotten, having only heard the story. Not forgotten that a man had died, but that the man hadn't died yet. "I'm coming with you."

Shinichi dipped his head, acknowledging. "Ran's going to win the championship; I promised weeks ago I'd take her to Tropical Land afterward, but I doubt she'd mind if you came along. Which means you won't have to pull the 'disguised stalker' routine."

"Mm, and the heist's another two nights after that. Your parents laying low?"

"Tou-san is, trying to avoid his editors like always. Kaa-san's probably terrorizing the town."

"'Terrorizing' is such a strong word…" Kaito grinned.

"You have met my mother, right?"

"Well…"

"Kaito, you break minds more-or-less incidentally. Kaa-san works at it." Shinichi's sardonic eyebrow had several things to add.

Kaito snickered, "Okay, yeah, Yukiko-chan's pretty bad."

"Hey, I'm the one who has her as a mother."

The snickers turned to muffled cackles, "Oh, gods, Shin-chan! I feel so sorry for you!"

xxxx

The remainder of the day passed peacefully enough, barring a brief interlude involving yet another murder the moment Kaito left Shinichi in Aoko and Hakuba's presence while running home to drop off their school things.

Hakuba had—somewhat unexpectedly—been so interested in seeing Shinichi work that he had stayed on the sidelines and not investigated himself. After the case had been broken down and concluded within five minutes of Division Ones' officers arrival at the café, a grand total of maybe fifteen minutes after the young man had died, he'd seemed genuinely impressed. (Aoko had been upset and disturbed enough that she had gone to her father's office immediately afterward and refused to go home alone while also refusing to let any or all of the boys go with her.)

The morning after that (two days left before the blackmail deal), Hakuba met up with Shinichi and Kaito on the way to school. "Kudo-san, Kuroba," he greeted, a little more casual than was believable.

"Hey, Hakuba," Kaito greeted right back, eyes sparking with sudden mischief.

"Hakuba-san," Shinichi returned calmly, reaching over to place a firm hand on Kaito's shoulder and tapping out a basic admonition with one finger. 'Behave.'

"I had heard, Kudo-san," Hakuba stated slowly, dropping in to walk next to them, "that you are the best detective in Japan. I had heard speculation on a wider range than that. I had also heard that you are arrogant, vain, and completely without care for the people around you."

Shinichi's grip on Kaito's shoulder tightened in warning as the magician bristled.

"The latter rumors were quickly disproved upon meeting you. You are distant with the other students and very direct in speech and manner, true… but I have not seen this 'uncaring' attitude I've heard of. While you do possess a certain air of confidence, you do not strike me as arrogant—or, you did not, until I witnessed your manner at a crime scene."

Shinichi gestured easily, "And?"

"This leads me to believe that you have promoted the views held on you intentionally."

"Huh," Kaito murmured. "He caught on pretty quick."

"What I do not understand is why you promote such a view of yourself," Hakuba finished, ignoring Kaito's observation.

"It's simple, Hakuba-san. I am young, easily recognizable, and have a large fan-base that I do not want. The less pleasant my personality seems to those who do not personally know me, the fewer stalkers I have to deal with. I dislike having to see people hurting each other or having to arrest them for doing so; this means that I am less often a factor in the choices that may lead to either—or both—of those things."

"Ah," Hakuba considered that. "Well, that makes an unfortunate amount of sense."

Kaito's head tilted curiously, "Oi, Hakuba—what about the rest of what you'd heard?"

The British detective grimaced, "I did not believe the former of the media-promoted rumors… but they are the ones that seem most accurate."

"Oh?" Kaito grinned, "So you think Shinichi's good at what he does?"

"Very," the admission was grudging, but respectful for all of that. "I could not have cracked that case as quickly or with nearly as much cooperation from the local law enforcement."

"Megure-keibu respects ability," Shinichi stated. "So do Sato-san and Takagi-keiji. If you prove competent and trustworthy, they will listen to you; regardless of your age or official occupation. Most of the other Division One officers are the same way. Those that are not are generally assigned to cases away from younger consultants or under a senior officer with more sense."

"Good to know," Hakuba murmured.

"Mm," Shinichi glanced sideways at the other detective, catching the pensive expression. "Hakuba-san… why are you really here?"

Hakuba sighed, "It really is impossible to hide something from you, isn't it?"

Kaito shrugged on Shinichi's other side, "Told you. He notices everything."

Shinichi just waited, listening to their feet tap against asphalt.

"I… will you teach me?"

Well. That was… unexpected, actually. The Hakuba he'd met as Conan would have been too proud to ask. Then again, the Hakuba he'd met as Conan hadn't been told a number of truths that may have put him just a bit more on guard than he had been before.

"Depends on what you mean," Shinichi decided on. "I can teach you caution. I can teach you how to survive and how to watch for a suspect who intends suicide or a 'blaze of glory'. I can teach you what certain things mean and the usefulness of what others would deem 'useless trivia'. What I cannot teach you is how to see. I can't teach you not to jump to conclusions, not to over-focus on a single unproven suspect... those things you will either learn on your own or not learn at all. There is no substitute for experience."

Hakuba bowed his head, "I see. If you are willing to teach what you can…"

"You'll get plenty of experience if you hang around Shinichi, more when I'm not there," Kaito stated.

Shinichi nodded, "That is likely true. I'll do what I can, Hakuba-san. I'd like to see you do well. You're a little rash, but you have a good eye and a good heart."

Hakuba's lips quirked upwards briefly, "I'm pretty sure that was mostly a compliment."

"Mostly," Kaito agreed, "but Shin-chan doesn't say things like that unless they're true. He doesn't believe in flattery."

"Aa," Shinichi smiled, small and genuine. "Hakuba-kun," he deliberately changed the suffix he applied to the Brit, "You're into falconry, right? You have a raptor of some kind."

"Ano… hai. How did you… no, nevermind. There is evidence," Hakuba conceded, "Watson's an Eleonora's falcon*, a bit smaller than a Peregrine. They are primarily large insect hunters, but she's being trained to attack on command and seems to prefer hunting small birds such as finches."

"I see," Shinichi tilted his head, "I'm aware that falcons tend to be both quicker and more agile than hawks, but wouldn't a Harris' hawk be more reliable as a detective's assistant?"

Hakuba blinked, "Well, probably, but she's not supposed to be a detective's assistant. She's a hunting bird. Any cases she ends up on are purely incidental—that is, when I can't take her back to her hut after getting called."

"In that case," Shinichi nodded slightly, "How much time do you need for her each day and when do you need it?"

"Oh, already making plans," Kaito bounced two steps before settling again. "Keep your falcon away from my doves. I will train them to paint-bomb her if she harasses them."

Hakuba apparently decided to ignore that threat, "I prefer to have at least two solid hours for her every afternoon, but I take her out in the mornings before school and she can get by with just that provided its not too many days in a row. She's not well enough trained to take around Tokyo, but she's easy enough to handle in more rural areas with fewer people. She is very young, though, and I'm working on increasing her focus and obedience with multiple distractions."

"Hoping to have her able to handle crowds if needed? Good idea. That aside, though, I've got plans for the day after tomorrow and two days after that will be pretty… interesting, but if you give me a basic schedule, we'll see what we can work out."

"Thank you," Hakuba turned to give a proper bow. "Kudo-sensei."

Kaito snickered and Shinichi sighed, "If you call me that at school, I will help Kaito prank you."

xxxx

*Watson as an Eleonora's falcon is, admittedly, non-canon. As far as I've been able to find, her species isn't specified and she's generically referred to as a hawk. In the one anime episode I've seen her in (219), she is smaller than most hawks and the one good underside shot with spread wings… well, she really looks like one of these falcons. That is not to say that there aren't any hawks of similar size or similar coloring, but I don't personally know one that falls into both categories at the same time, so I'm dubbing her a falcon over a hawk. They're both raptors, and I don't think the author of the DC/MK universe is a falconer, considering the lack of specifics on his one bird of prey as illustrated in the series. This means I feel like I can label Watson how I please. Note: male birds of prey are almost always noticeably smaller than females, which means the female falcon I have in my head is of a similar size to anime-Watson, while a male would be smaller. (Also note: I am not a falconer myself, but I am very casually acquainted with one in my area through a friend. This means I know more than most Americans probably do, but I am far from anything approaching professional. I haven't even been out to his house and the only bird of his I met was a Harris' hawk he was taking to a lecture out of state. Beautiful and about as friendly as you can get with a bird of prey. As one of the VERY FEW group-hunters in the raptor world, they are apparently much easier to train than most other predatory birds. I wanted to make Watson one of them, but not only are they a fairly good size, their three basic color patterns don't match anime-Watson at all.)