"We just came from Venus now we got to go back there again? I'm not sure why the Queen would want a Vex head but then again Uldren did say they don't need one but it's our only hope of getting into the Black Garden." Tegan and Kai kept trying to come up with ideas on trying to get the Gate Lord head. I stayed silent steering my ship. More memories started to course through me and this time these are the bad ones.
"You're worthless. You can't do anything right."
"Remember it's your fault that your parents and your little sister are dead."
"If you want my love you have to earn it and to earn it you have to work for it."
These are the things Uldren would say to me when I don't please him during a training session or a mission. "I wish you would check with me before making insane promises. If we want to take down a Gate Lord, we've got to find how these machines operate. Let's find the biggest one we can, pull out its brain, and see what we can learn about them."
"Oh Ghost then if I do that where's the fun in the adventure. This will be quick don't worry." I said trying to lighten up the mood. We landed back into the Headlands and started our Gate Lord hunt. "OK, there is a big Vex signature just up the coast. Let's kill it whatever it is and bring its mind core to one of the old Academy Research Labs."
During the mission I couldn't think straight all I thought of were the times Uldren degraded me for failing him and it's hard to believe a strong girl like me would think it's my fault and that I do deserve the harsh treatment that Uldren gives me. The more we ventured the more we walked in deeper of the jungles of Venus and the more harder and heavier the rain got.
"Up ahead. A ridiculously large Vex emission. Sounds like what we're looking for." We were greeted with Goblins and a new kind of Vex, Harpies and a Cyclop. "That is a very large Cyclop but it can be destroyed." I pulled out my Golden Gun but as soon as I did that the memories started to come. Why? Why at this time?
I was out of it I remember the times where I would be scolded for being weak but there was one training session where Uldren took it too far.
We were sparring. I was quickly put on defense as Uldren kept striking my dagger with his blows. I stepped back a lot to give each some space. "Harder. You have to be stronger now." I wiped away the sweat and charged with all my strength and fury. For the first time I felt like I was doing good. I felt like I was gonna win against Uldren. I thought today might be the day where I hear one good thing come out of his mouth about me. I kept imagining the day where I would earn his trust and love. I would always dream of the day where he would smile at me and finally accept me for who I am. I was so distracted that I didn't notice the sudden change in position.
I felt the scar on my left cheek.
Uldren made a quick move and I could feel the cold, hard metal slice into my left cheek. I was quickly brought out of the dream world and back into reality. It was hard to gain back the momentum. We locked blades and suddenly Uldren drew out another blade from behind him.
Even though my scar is covered by my pants I placed my hand where the scar is on my left thigh.
His second blade sliced through my left thigh and with a quick swipe of leg he knocked me down. My dagger was knocked away from my hands when I hit the floor. As I was about to reach for it Uldren dragged me away and entrapped my neck with his two blades.
"You're weak, undisciplined, and what's worse you're illusioned by dreams and stories that your parents and Mara tell you. Wake up! Don't you see a girl like you won't survive unless you train and work harder until you're past the point where you can no longer feel any pain or emotion. I just can't believe Mara chose you to be the next queen."
"But there's more to life than training and fighting and being the strongest. There's love. No one can survive without love or kindness or light. There's both light and dark in this world and we need both to survive."
Uldren let me out of the blade cage around my neck and when I arose he slapped me so hard that I fell to the ground again. "What do you think? That warriors are free to love? Never. Besides you can work as hard as you want. Study as hard as you want. But you'll still be the worthless, little piece of nothing you were when you first came here." Uldren walked away leaving me in my sadness. "Useless Nothing." I tried to hold in my tears. I tried not to cry. I was trained by him to not cry because crying makes me look weak and I don't want to be viewed as weak but in this moment I wanted to cry. I really did.
"Nahra! Nahra! Nahra!" I was snapped back to reality and I found myself on the ground. "What happened?" I asked. "You froze up and the Cyclops killed you don't worry we have the mind core but it looked like you were reminiscing a memory and I'm gonna have to guess it was a bad one. A very bad one."
"Good. Let's head for that research station I'll be alright. We just need to push on." I could sense Kai's uneasiness about me as we got out of the jungles and into the Ishtar Cliffs. "Their mind cores are actually biological. Not relative to any known life forms recorded. Maybe the Collective's research can tell us more." I told my Ghost to keep on telling us information so I can ease off Kai's feelings and mine.
When we reached the Waking Ruins my Ghost shared more information. "These ruins predate humanity by a few billion years. Vex are coursing through them." I got off my Sparrow and reached to touch the ruins and he was right I could feel Vex energy coursing in them. We finally got to the research site where it was heavily guarded by Fallen but too bad so sad Fallen we need this place more than you do.
"Nice work. There's got to be a central terminal around here... found one. Let's see if I can get this thing to work... It's revivable I'll see what they discovered here." Then more Vex started to come. "Vex! They're coming!" We fought them so effortlessly but I went through some relapses of bad memories which interrupted my fighting. Kai managed to grab me before one of the Goblins made a shot at me. He told me to stay with my Ghost while they do the fighting. I crouched down and put my hands to my head trying to get the memories to stop. I tried to make it stop hurting.
"The Vex share one mind across a million units! That's why they react so fast!" Great so they're fast learners. The only enemy I've seen that actually have a mind to think as fast. "Amazing! They can warp across star systems in an instant."
"That's great Ghost but let's save the fun facts for later and get to how we can defeat a Gate Lord." The fight was over and Tegan and Kai were walking towards me. "I'm almost done... I know how to find a Gate Lord! Each Vex is part of a giant network that spreads throughout the mantle of the entire planet. If I can just get into their system, we can draw a Gate Lord out."
"Well what are we waiting for let's get to it." That uneasy feeling came back and I can sense it again in Kai. "Wait before we go can I talk to you Nahra. Tegan can you give us some privacy?"
"Of course I'll just leave you lovebirds with some privacy." After Tegan left it was just me and Kai. I guess there's no escaping this anymore. Looks like I'll have to fess up on why I've been acting so strange. I didn't want it to come like this but my friends will have to know my past sooner or later.