Chapter 12: Jam and Mead
24th November, 1976.
The decorations were up in no time, what with all the experience that we, the Marauders, had. Not to sound conceited in my own head, but I am an amazing flyer. That brings about a lot of Quidditch wins, which causes a lot of Common Room parties, and also the fact that dogs are no longer allowed as pets at Hogwarts after our 5th year.
But this time, it isn't anything that I won that has brought celebrations to the Common Room. It's Lily. The same Lily that had gotten so drunk once that she thought Padfoot was her own dog (She did not even have a dog, just an owl named Beatrice. Don't ask how I know, but Beatrice loves pooping on their owner's enemies). The same Lily that was smart enough to get away without studying, but still spent hours pouring over new information just because she thought it was interesting. The same Lily that I have been in love with since 3rd year.
"Hey, James," I was shaken out of my Lily-dreams by, guess who, Lily. Of course, it's Lily. We're supposed to be 'mates' now. I think it was because she was rather sad that I was being cold to her. But it's not my fault that I can't seem to think straight when I'm around her. I was trying hard to get over her when I was all 'Evans this' and 'Evans that' instead of 'Lily this' and 'Lily that'. I have no idea how using her last name would have helped, but I had to do something.
"Hi, Lily! What's up?" I asked her calmly. As we have now become mates, I have come up with a few ground rules over how to converse with her.
Do NOT mention Severus 'Snivellus' Snape.
Do NOT talk about Lily's family.
Do NOT talk about yourself too much.
Do NOT take credit for teaching her how to swim.
Do NOT mention the Tournament to her unless specified.
"I just wanted to thank you for the swimming lessons," replied Lily to my previous question, "I meant what I said to Dumbledore, I could not have done it without you."
I fidgeted at her compliment and my hands went straight up to my hair. I was not used to this New Lily. I was used to the Lily that hexed me after every word I said. It was painful when I rambled because, well, my rants can go on for ages.
"Um, no worries, you're welcome. Actually, you could have done it without me." I replied, trying to follow all of my 5 rules.
"Oh, no I couldn't. You have no idea what kind of experiences I've had at the pool," she visibly shuddered. I wonder what she was talking about. Everyone knows Lily is one heck of a mystery. She doesn't let it on, but she has so many secrets that one day she is going to explode. And that could be a bad day for James Fleamont Potter. A very bad day.
"Okay, then. Hey, look! It's that American, Jennifer. You should go talk to her. It's nice to keep your enemies close."
"She is not my enemy, please. I just get a weird vibe from her. But I guess I should go talk to her. Do me a favour and make sure that Sirius doesn't get too drunk. Oh, and also Marlene. We do not want a repeat episode of what happened last time."
I shuddered at the memory. At the end of the year party last year, Sirius and Marlene, as usual, got drunk. They made out and ended up drooling all over each other when Marlene hid in our dorm when McGonagall showed up to shush us. Long story short, it took days to get the pink off of Padfoot's Quidditch robes.
"Aye, aye, Captain," I said.
Lily nodded and walked over to Jennifer. She was pretty - blonde hair, blue eyes, and long legs. But in comparison to Lily's red hair, she looked rather dull.
I looked around the Common Room in search of my friends. As I had expected, Sirius was down by the drinks. It looked like he had already had at least 3 glasses of Firewhiskey, and so I made my way towards him trying to rescue him.
"Woah, there, Padfoot, slow down. We do not want you turning into a dog again."
"Prongs! My man! I have been searching for you everywhere! Where were you mate?" he shouted.
"Umm, I was right here, decorating the Room with you? Come on, let's get you out of here before you throw up all over the drinks."
I started walking him towards the couch in front of the fireplace but then I saw Marlene snogging some Ravenclaw and instantly turned around. We don't want Sirius seeing that. So, I helped him towards the window when he asked one of his famous 'When I Am Drunk And About To Throw Up, I Ask Weird But Sensible Questions.'
"Hey Prongs, have you ever thought of what turkeys eat at Thanksgiving?"
"Okay, that's the cue for you to go to bed." We marched up the staircase. Well, I marched while dragging Padfoot.
"To bed? But I don't want to go to bed! It's not even ten yet, you're so boring!"
"Hey! Never call me boring, I am not boring. I just know that if you stay at the party any longer, you will throw up all over the place and Marlene will hate you forever. Which neither of us wants, do we?"
"Ooh, Marlene! Isn't she sooooo pretty? I feel like eating her up every time I see her..."
"Okay, I did not need to know that," I cringed at the mental image, "Now, you go to sleep and puke when you need to. I'm going back and locking you just in case you get any ideas. Bye!" I said, slamming the door in his nose and locked the door.
I sprinted down the stairs in hopes of joining in Lily and Jennifer's conversation. But, as I had expected, they had now separated. Jennifer was now talking to a slightly buzzed Mary MacDonald and it seemed that Lily had moved to the drinks' table. Oh, Merlin, she was going to get drunk and snog some guy senseless, wasn't she?
"Oi, Lily!" I said to her from near the staircases.
"Yo, Potty! What is up?" she said loudly as if there was something stuck in her ears.
"Ugh, I thought we were over the Potty phase!" I hated that name. She had come up with it in 6th year when she finally realized that my last name shared an unfortunate number of syllables with the obscenity.
"Nuh, uh," she said. She obviously had a few drinks down, the way she was talking. "You will always be Potty Potter. Potty Potter, Potty Potter, Potty Potter. You have such a strange name. James Potter. Ja-mes Pott-er. James. James Potter. James Potty Potter. James whatever-your-middle-name-is Potter. Jam Potter. Jam Potty. Yes! Jam Potty! That is it!"
"Jam Potty? What is that, a new delicacy?"
"Nuh, uh, Mr. Potter, it's your new name. I, Lily Elizabeth Evans, officially christen James what's-it Potter as Jam Potty."
"It's Fleamont."
"Oh, bless you."
"It's Fleamont."
"Looks like you're on a roll, Potty, bless you."
"No, my middle name, it's Fleamont."
"Wait, what?"
"My middle name is Fleamont."
"Woah, okay. So your full name is James Fleamont Potter?"
"Yes, yes it is."
"Right, okay. James Fleamont Potter. Hello, James Fleamont Potter, how do you do today?"
"Okay, enough with the middle names. I am very fine today, Lily Elizabeth Evans, how about you?"
"I am fantastic, James Fleamont Potter, thank you very much."
"I thought I said enough with the middle names."
"Well, I had planned on stopping it but then you Elizabeth-ed me, so I had to retaliate."
"Right, anyway, did you talk to the Ilvermorny girl?"
"Who, Jenny? Oh yeah, she's amazing. And she's got this awesome accent. Ooh, and did you know these people call biscuits cookies? How weird is that?"
"Yeah, plenty weird," I said uncertainly.
"Anyway, Jam Flea Potty, I have to go get a lot more drunk now so that I can puke it out peacefully tomorrow morning, so ta-ta!"
"Hey, not so fast. We don't want what happened last time to happen again, do we?"
"Why, what happened last time?"
"Um, you snogged that guy like there was no tomorrow? And then threw up all over the place? Oh and let's forget the dog adopting."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Speaking of dogs, where's my drinking bud, Sirius?"
"He's gone to bed."
"WHAT? It can't be. There is no way Sirius Orion Black is asleep on a party night."
"I kind of banished him. And if you don't want the same happening to you, you have to stop drinking."
"Oh, but Jam, why would you want that? You know what you should do? You should grab a glass and then we can see who can drink more."
"Umm, I think not."
"Why not? It will be fun, plus there's a chance for you to be snogged tonight."
"What?"
"What, what?" I could see Lily put up a fake innocent face and see all the cursing she was doing inside her head. Does this mean that she likes me? After that Robert Hook incident, I know that a drunken Lily can make over-exaggerated confessions of infatuation. But the calculating look in her eyes tells me that she is not ready for that conversation yet. Hmm, I guess I should drink with her; it'll probably get my mind of all that stuff. Curse you, Robert Hook!
"You know what, nothing. And you know what, I will drink with you."
"Yay! Okay, great. Let's see now, how about some mead?"
"Sure, whatever you want, Lils."
Oh, no. It slipped out – I swear – I hadn't even thought about it. She gave me an incredulous look and went back to pouring mead into glasses. It wasn't every day that James Potter called Lily Evans 'Lils'. He used to say it regularly when they were kids, but after 5th year, everything had gone to the dogs.
It was now my turn to mentally curse myself.
'How could you, Lils?'
'Can't you see, James? I had to!'
'You didn't have to do anything! You always have a choice!'
The last time I called her 'Lils' came rushing back to me. It was all 'Evans' and 'Potter' since then on.
"Here you go," she shook me out of my reverie as she handed me a glass of mead.
"Here's to our new found friendship," I say as we kinked our glasses together.
"Here's to old friends finding their ways back to each other," Lily said before gulping down her entire glass in one go. "LILS AND JAM FOREVER," she shouted to no one in particular, helping herself to another drink.
"Hello Lily, Lily's friend," I heard a heavy accented voice behind me. Both Lily and I turned around and stifled a groan.
It was that Aleksander guy from Durmstrang. All the girls in the school seemed to be enamoured by him – I have no idea why. Fine, he looks kind-of good, and he seems to have one of the coolest accents in the world, but looks aren't everything. He seems like a right dunce,
"Hey, Aleksander," replied Lily, "this is Jam Potty, my friend."
I gave her a serious glare and turned to Dragomir and said, "James Potter, she means."
"Oh, so you are the famous James Potter!" he said.
"Famous? I'm not famous," I replied, puzzled. I may be Quidditch God at Hogwarts but I have no idea how Dragomir has heard of me.
"Oh, but you are. You play Chaser, right? And half the girls at this school want to go to the Yule Ball with you."
"Sure, why not?" I say noncommittedly. I knew if I said something conceited, Lily would use it against me in one of our future arguments.
I searched around the room for a distraction as Lily and Dragomir flirted in front of me. Ugh, what does she see in him? That's when I saw the window.
Woah, Alice and Frank talking by the window? That never happened. Frank was an inert kind of guy. Even though he was one of our roommates; he never really took part in our pranks and schemes. But he was one of our friends.
My eyes scanned the room again and I noticed Edouard glaring daggers at the couple. Looks like he's got a little crush on Alice, or Frank. So, I guess I should leave him be with his sadness.
"Hey, Lils," God that happened again, she turns to me and I continue, "look at Frank and Alice, looks like they hit it off."
She turned to the direction I was nodding at and smiled as she saw her two friends talk animatedly about something. "Looks like everyone's hitting it off, doesn't it?" she replied.
Dragomir then said, "Well, I guess I'll see you both later, I have things to do, goodbye!"
Ugh, I hate it when people give me nothing to hate them for. Can you believe it? He looks like someone who could be extremely conceited, but he isn't! He seems like a perfectly nice guy, but he was talking to Lily in a way that only I used to at a point, so I don't like him.
"Bye, Alek!" Lily exclaimed I noticed her eyes follow Dragomir's trail. I think she likes him, there isn't anything about him not to like, but I still don't like him.
The party soon faded out as the kids from the other houses and schools left. Soon it was just us, 6th year Gryffindors left in the Common Room, trying to finish up the Firewhiskey that Remus and Peter had been so obediently supplying.
"IIII KNOWWW YOOUUU I WALKED WITH YOU ONCE UPON A DREEAAAMMMM," Lily had been singing that muggle song incessantly for the past 15 minutes and it had started taking a toll on me and the others.
Frank and Alice seemed to be in their own world, talking about who knows what. Mary was 2 bottles of mead down and as of then, unconscious. Marlene, who had been snogging that Ravenclaw for the entirety of the party was now finally drinking something and complaining about how chapped her lips were. Sirius was still detained in the dorm. Remus and Peter were playing Exploding Snap behind the couch after their party errands. Lily was lying on the couch, singing. And I was staring at the fire, sitting in front of the couch, thinking about last year.
It had been a terrible year – that Snape thing happened, that other Snape thing happened, and that other Snape thing happened. I think I'm starting to see a pattern here. Snape is responsible for everything that goes wrong in my life and I loathe him for it. I mean, he's such a dunce. He manipulated Lily for years, and I think he stole my one of my books last week – arse.
"YOU'LL LOVE ME AT ONCE, THE WAY YOU DID ONCEEE UPPOOONN A DREAAAAMMM."
"Okay, Lily that's enough," Remus said from behind the couch, he was right of course, he's always right.
"BUT IT'S MY FAVOURITE SONNNGGGG," pouted Lily.
"But that does not mean you try and rupture our eardrums by singing it."
"Hey! You know what an eardrum is?"
"Of course I know what an eardrum is. What do you think I did before I got to Hogwarts?"
"Umm, spend hours upon hours pondering about how sad your life is and how unfortunate it is that you have to wait until you're 11 to get to Hogwarts?"
"No," Marlene's reply came from nowhere. She hadn't spoken up until now and her voice surprised us. "We studied. How do you think we know how to write, Lily?"
"I don't know, magic, perhaps?"
"Nope," Peter said. He and Remus peeked at Lily from behind the sofa. "We spend our childhood learning just like muggles do."
"How come you didn't know that, Lily?" I asked her, it's a wonder she didn't know, "didn't you ask anyone before?"
"As a matter of fact, I did, but that someone had a habit of putting off my questions. Anyway, I'm going to bed now." She started to get up but was so drunk that she could not stand straight and fell right back on the couch.
"That's your cerebellum not functioning properly under the influence of alcohol," commented Remus.
"Yeah, and did you know that the alcohol you consumed is being oxidized into a compound called an aldehyde that will make you throw up in about 5 hours?" said Marlene.
"Okay, fine! I get it! You people know things. Sorry for underestimating you!"
"Thank you, we appreciate it," said Peter.
Soon everyone fell asleep, Frank and Alice included and of course, Sirius was still up in the room. Lily was lying on the couch with her head on Marlene's lap who slept in a sitting position. Mary was still unconscious in the armchair next to the couch. Remus and Peter had fallen asleep on the floor behind the couch but it seemed like they had forgotten that there were Exploding Snap cards right in front of them, and both their eyebrows had been singed. Frank and Alice were by the window, their heads together as they slept soundly.
November 25th, 1976.
"WHAT ARE ALL OF YOU DOING ASLEEP?" Some crazy person screamed. Everyone stirred awake, everyone except, of course, for Lily.
"Shut your trap, Black," murmured Marlene, her eyes still closed.
"NO, I WILL NOT, MCKINNON. YOU PEOPLE NEED TO WAKE UP NOW."
"I am the Mistress of all Evil…," mumbled Lily.
"I don't know about Lily, but Padfoot sure is the Mistress of all Evil," said Remus as he slowly woke up.
"HEY! I'M NO MISTRESS, I AM THE MASTER!"
"Sure, because that's better," Mary was finally awake. After 12 hours of continuous sleep, she looked fresh and not hung over, something I was jealous of because my throat was burning.
"SIRIUS ORION BLACK," I screamed in the same tone that he had been using, "HOW IN THE NAME OF CIRCE'S NOT EXISTANT BEARD DID YOU GET OUT OF THE DORM?"
"BECAUSE, JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER," replied Padfoot.
"Bless you, Black," said Marlene.
He ignored her and said, "IT MAY HAVE ESCAPED YOUR NOTICE THAT I AM A WIZARD AND KNOW HOW TO UNLOCK LOCKED DOORS."
"Oh, right," I realized, sheepishly.
"WHY IS LILY STILL ASLEEP?" Sirius said loudly.
"Because," started Mary, "it's Sunday and it's before 12 noon."
"LILY ELIZABETH EVANS, WAKE UP!" Sirius screamed.
"Listen well, all of you," Lily was still talking in her sleep, but everyone was now paying her rapt attention, "the Princess shall indeed grow in grace and beauty, beloved by all who know her, but, before the Sun sets on her 16th birthday, she shall prick her finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel and die."
Mary had now lost it and started laughing unceasingly.
"WHAT THE HELL IS SHE ON ABOUT? AND WHY IS MARY LAUGHING?" Sirius was still screaming.
"She's dreaming about a muggle fairytale. God knows what's up with her," Mary said between giggles.
"Well, I know how to wake her up. I have the same unpleasant job every morning," Marlene stated. She got up and walked to the back of the couch and pushed Lily off of it.
"WHAT IN THE NAME OF MERLIN'S TIGHTY WHITIES IS GOING ON HERE?" There she was, Lily Evans, screaming obscenities as soon as she woke up.
"Believe it or not, she has a new insult every day," Mary said as-a-matter-of-factly.
Alice and Frank had been conversing again when all this had been taking place.
"Anyone know what's been going on with them?" Wormtail asked us. Everyone shrugged, watching them closely.
'NOW THAT YOU ALL ARE AWAKE, I THINK I CAN STOP SCREAMING," Padfoot, of course, screamed. "Hehe, I did that on purpose, let's go get some breakfast, I am hungry!"
So, all nine of us walked (more like got dragged for Lily) down together – after a whole year – unbathed and hung over. The Great Hall was almost empty at 10 o' clock. Just a few people were at the Slytherin and Hufflepuff tables. But, at the Slytherin table was also Snape. God, I hate him. And he seemed to be glaring daggers at us.
"Ooh, waffles," exclaimed Wormtail.
We sat down and started piling up our plates. The bacon and eggs were fantastic as always, but it seemed as if Lily loved them so much that such felt like joining them on her plate. She had apparently fallen asleep on her breakfast.
"Lily," I called to her. All I got was a snore in response, I didn't know Lily snored. It just didn't seem like the kind of thing she would do. "Lily," I repeat.
"Don't even try, James," Mary advised me, "it's not going to happen. Also, she only snores when she's tired – or so she thinks." Mary, Marlene and Alice shared a cryptic smile that probably said 'he doesn't know what he's getting into'.
But I was in the mood for rebellion, so I called out to her sleeping form again, "Lily, Lilyyyyy, Liiiiily, Evans, wake up!" There was no response up until I said: "Come on, Lils!"
"Yeah, you go slay that dragon, Philip!" she mumbled in her sleep.
"Ooh, that kind of worked," commented Alice with an impressed smile. "We usually try the 'you're late for Potions' routine. It usually works."
"LILS!" I shout, losing patience.
"FINALLY, HE HAS THE SENSE TO GO KISS HER!" She has finally awoken – with bacon all over her face. I haven't the foggiest as to what she talks about in her sleep but it's kind of amusing. Slaying dragons? Kissing girls? Woah.
"Oh my God. Congratulations, James. You have succeeded in waking up Lily, you're one of the only 4 people on the planet who can carry out the task, you should be really proud," smirked Marlene, with a knowing look on her face.
"Lily," said Remus, "what have you been dreaming about?"
Lily instantly reddened. "What? What are you talking about? I haven't been getting any weird dreams."
"Getting defensive, I see," Sirius chimed in, "it seems to me that you have been having some bizarre dreams that you don't know the source of."
"Since when do dreams have sources?" Lily was trying to evade the topic, but she wasn't any good at it – she needs lessons for that.
"Don't try to change the topic, Evans, we know all about your dragon-slaying dreams," smirked Peter.
If possible, Lily's cheeks reddened further – God, she looked good when she blushed. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
Mary, Marlene and Alice broke into fits of unceasing laughter. "Shut up!" exclaimed Lily. "Ugh, what do you guys have against me?"
"Lily, you do realize that there are parts of your breakfast all over your face, right?" I noticed.
It seemed as if all the blood from her body had decided to work against gravity and creep up to Lily's head and neck region. With her already red hair, she looked like a tomato with limbs. I loved it.
The girls were still laughing, no one knew why.
"Will someone please tell me what's happening?" asked Remus, completely unawares.
"Okay, okay," started Mary, "I'll tell you, you see, Lily has this thing about Muggle fairytales. She dreams about them. They're like movies in her head except with the characters are people she knows – it gets extremely awkward sometimes – but that's beside the point. So, Lily, pray tell who these characters were?"
"Well, if you people are going to tease me about my weird dreams – nightmare, rather – I would prefer going to get these bacon bits off my face, so ta-ta!"
She left the Great Hall as fast as she could and my eyes followed her path. But I couldn't help but notice the other pair of eyes that were following her from their place at the Slytherin table and their owner quickly left the Hall, after her.
A/N: We still haven't found a better title for our story. It's extremely random to have a story that is set over 2 years to have the title 'The Year That Was'. Please help us find a new title!
Reviews are Snape stuffing it and leaving Jily alone. So, PLEASE REVIEW!