A/N: Well, Edward met the children and had a less than welcoming experience with JJ. How do you think he'll handle it? We find out the start of how he handles it in this chapter.

Stay with me, my friends. There is a point to all of this.

Thanks again to my betas!

Chapter 12 – Decisions

"It is hard to imagine a more stupid or more dangerous way of making decisions than by putting those decisions in the hands of people who pay no price for being wrong."

Thomas Sowell

Edward

I boarded my plane with a heavy heart. Without thinking, I had flown to Reno to be there for Bella. Unfortunately, I hadn't taken the children into account. Leah was found safe—which was wonderful—but the whole encounter with JJ had left a bad taste in my mouth. He had been very clear about his feelings…and I doubted that I could do much about it. Maybe it would just take time.

The trip had done nothing to alleviate the fears that I already had about being a stepdad. I knew that Bella hadn't made any promises to marry me, hell, she hadn't even mentioned having a serious relationship yet, but I hoped she would one day. She appeared to feel the same way I did—or at least similar. However, the challenge was her children. I never knew Jake, so I couldn't try and be more like him…and I'm not sure if that was a good idea anyway.

I sat down and leaned my head back against the seat. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and tried to figure out what my next move would be.

"Hey there, handsome," a soft voice said. I opened my eyes and looked into the very blue eyes sitting in the seat next to me.

"Hi."

"I was just wondering what would cause a fine-looking man like yourself to look so sad," she said in a sultry voice. Her strawberry blonde hair fell in soft waves around her face as she leaned closer to me. "I thought this trip was a total bust until I saw you."

Her entire appearance screamed 'sex.' She slowly crossed her legs, her short skirt riding up, revealing even more of her long legs. She was very beautiful and acted like she knew it, too. I was immediately attracted to her.

"Are you in Reno for work or pleasure?" I asked, surprised at how easily the flirting tone came out.

"Pleasure…with a side of work." She grinned at me and leaned a little closer. "You don't come to Nevada for just work. The whole state was created for pleasure."

Grinning, I leaned a little closer to her. "I know just what you mean."

Our conversation throughout the plane ride was very smooth. We ended up having a lot in common: working in the same field, living in the same part of Seattle and both growing up in a small town. I found her to be very smart and funny. She made me laugh so much that by the time we landed my cheeks were hurting.

We exchanged phone numbers before we separated. I told her that I would call her and we could get together shortly.

"By the way, I don't think I asked you. What's your name?" she asked, pulling her luggage off the rack.

"Edward," I said, holding my hand out to her.

"Tonya."

It was a couple hours later before I remembered to call Bella to let her know I had gotten home safely.

~~ANB~~

Bella

In the week that followed Leah's disappearance, and the disastrous conversation with JJ and Edward, life pretty much got back to normal. The kids went back to their daily fights, homework battles and bath vs. shower arguments. My digital communication with Edward had slowed down quite a bit, unfortunately. I wrote him an email every day, texted several times and even tried calling him, but he didn't respond to me as much as he used to.

By Saturday morning, I was convinced that Edward must be devastated by JJ's comment and decided that I needed to call him and discuss the issue. He needed to understand that JJ was young and didn't understand things yet.

Unfortunately, I got his voice mail. I left him a message, asking him to call me back, and then went back to cleaning. My mind was wandering as I vacuumed, and I almost hit Emily, who was sitting on the floor watching TV.

"Mommy!" she shrieked, jumping up and running to the couch.

"I'm sorry, Emmy," I said, sighing.

"Mom! Your phone is ringing!" JJ called from the kitchen.

Quickly turning off the vacuum, I ran to the table and grabbed my phone. "Hello?" I said, not bothering with checking my caller ID.

"Hey, B. How's it going?" My best friend, Rosalie, asked.

"Hi, Rose. I'm good, how are you doing?" I responded, sitting down at the kitchen table.

"You sound terrible. What's wrong?"

I sighed. Rose had always been very blunt and to the point.

"I haven't heard from Edward very much this week." JJ walked into the kitchen just as I had finished talking. Instead of trying to be cryptic, I decided to head into my bedroom to talk to Rose in private.

"Is that unusual?"

"Yeah. For the last few months since he came out, we've been talking daily. Since he went home after Leah's disappearing act, I have hardly heard from him at all."

"Has he said anything that would make you suspicious of his behavior?"

"No. He has hardly said anything. The texts I've received this week were only a few words. But, something did happen right before he left."

"What was that?"

I explained about the kiss and the outburst from JJ that came after. Rose was quiet for a minute, presumably thinking over the situation. I got up from my bed and began pacing.

"Hmm," she finally said. "I bet that freaked him out."

"Which one?" I said, attempting a joke.

She didn't laugh, though. "Well, both of them I guess. But, I was referring to Edward. From all that you've told me about him, I gather that he wants a relationship with you. He realizes he would have to be father to your kids if you two get married…he's a smart guy, B. JJ's comment probably scared him into thinking your kids might never accept him."

"Yeah, that's what I've been afraid of." I stopped pacing and sat back down on the bed. "What do I do about it?"

"Well, since he isn't answering your phone calls, send him an email explanation," she said, thoughtfully. "But, before you do, I have a question for you."

"Okay, shoot."

"Do you want a relationship with him?"

Stunned into silence, I thought about her question for a moment. "Of course I do! Haven't I made that clear?"

"To me, maybe, but have you made it clear to him?" I was incapable of speaking, so Rose continued, "You told him that you needed more time to consider a relationship, but did you ever tell him in very specific terms that you wanted him in your life? That you wanted a relationship with him? Does he have any reason to think that you wouldn't want him one day and that you might find someone else in the mean time?"

Quickly, I began thinking through all of the conversations that we had had over the last few months. I asked him to wait for me, that the kids needed more time, that I still loved him…but did I actually say the words "I want you in my life?"

"Shit, Rose, I don't remember. I told him that I loved him…shouldn't that be a clue to him that I want him in his life?"

"B, he's a man."

"And?"

"Most guys that I know need things spelled out for them. He can't read your mind, so I would guess that he doesn't know exactly what your intentions are."

"It's too early for intentions!" I almost shouted. "I haven't seen him for thirteen years, Jake has only been gone for a little over a year and I have three children to consider."

"And what exactly do you have to consider?" Rose sighed. "Today, tomorrow or a year from now will be the same battle with the kids. Time doesn't make it any easier to think that their mother is trying to replace their dad….unless you are talking about waiting ten years or something."

"But—"

"No, wait, let me finish. Jake has been gone for over a year, and you are struggling as a single mom, I know you are. You have to be able to move on at some point."

"I know that, Rose, but what about the kids? Do you think it's good for them to have a mother get out there and start dating when they lost their dad so recently?" I paused for a moment. "JJ is only ten…I know he wouldn't be okay with it. He certainly proved that when Edward was out."

"Have you sat down with JJ and talked to him about it?"

"No."

"You should. Yes, he's a child, but since Jake died JJ has had to be the man of the house. Like it or not, he has had to grow up a lot in the last year. He sees you as his responsibility and he has to help you and protect you."

"I never thought about it that way…is that true?"

"B, what do I do for a living?" Rose asked, a hint of humor in her voice. She was a child psychiatrist, so she was definitely the expert.

"Yeah, okay. I don't know if I should talk to him…but I'll think about it."

"Good, that's all I ask. Now, my last question to you is this: what are you really afraid of?"

"What do you mean?"

"All of those reasons you gave me are valid, but nothing that you can't deal with. I want to know exactly what it is that has you freaking out about starting a relationship with him now."

Taking a deep breath, I decided to open up to her. "Edward has always been this fantasy man for me. We were never able to have a real relationship because of my mother. I'm afraid that I put him on this pedestal since I was seventeen, forcing Jake to have to live up to him during our marriage. What if he is flawed? What if I spent my whole life thinking about him and he isn't perfect?"

"That is the sanest thing you have said to me today. Now I totally understand what's going on." Rose took a deep breath, and I swear I could hear her smiling. "Of course you put him on a pedestal. Given how you two ended, and how much in love with him you were, and how abruptly you ended…well, that makes perfect sense to me.

"B, first of all, stop thinking that he is perfect! No one is perfect and Edward is no exception. He is human, and therefore flawed. He will make mistakes just like you and I do. He is just a man; a man who loves you and wants you in his life."

"And you don't think that I should take this year and just get to know him again?"

"No, I never said that. I like the idea of you two getting to know each other again, but I think you should be honest with him about how you feel. That's the only way that anything can work between you two."

"Thanks, Rose. What would I do without you?"

She laughed. "Emmett asks me that every day, and every day I tell him the same thing: you couldn't survive without me!"

My laughter joined hers. Emmett was her husband, who had been a good friend of Jake's. He was a smart man, but could have melt downs similar to one of my kids…he relied on Rose just as much as I did.

"When do I get to see you again, B?" Rose asked, changing the subject.

"How about we do lunch this weekend? Can Emmett watch the kids?"

Rose laughed. Emmett could play with the kids, but making sure they stayed out of trouble was not something he was good at. "I'll check with him, but that should be fine."

We ended the conversation shortly after that, and I brought up my email and began writing a long email to Edward. I had several things that I needed to explain.

A/N: So, how many people are angry at the direction this is going? Hopefully not too many! Keep in mind, because I've said this several times with my last story, I would NEVER not give Edward and Bella a HEA. Trust me.