**TRIGGER WARNING: PANICK ATTACK**

It was 5 am when Ciel got up that Saturday. After waking up at 4 am from his night terrors, he tried to go back to sleep but after staring at the celling for an hour, he decided he'd better get up and start with his day. He had to start packing because today, he was finally going home. He had called his mother the night before after finishing his talk with Alois, he told her he was going to stop by the house before leaving for the festival, which began at 2 pm. He and Sebastian had agreed to meet at the entrance of the university a few minutes before 2. After he finished packing and leaving everything spotless so that his aunt didn't have to clean after he was gone, he went to take a shower. By the time he had showered and gotten dressed, it was 7 am and his aunt was waiting for him with a cup of tea.

"Here" She said handing him his cup "It's Green tea, there wasn't enough Earl Gray to make a cup, I hope it's alright."

"You don't have to worry, it's more than alright." Ciel responded with a soft smile as he lifted the cup to his lips.

"After you finish eating I can help you pack if you want?" Angelina asked

"It's okay Aunt Ann, I already packed, I was actually thinking about going to the house after breakfast." He answered as he bit into a piece of Toast.

"Oh, okay" It looked like she was done talking but after a long pause she continued "You know you're always welcome here right?"

"Yes, I know, thank you for everything Aunt Ann, but you know this isn't goodbye forever right? We are still going to see each other all the time, we are family after all."

"Yes, you're right." She said with a small laugh. Once Ciel had cleared his place, he took his bags and made his way over to the door.

"I'll see you soon Aunt Ann."

"See you kiddo, drive safe." He nodded before turning around, he opened the door and closed it without looking behind him. He got to his car, put the bags in the trunk and quickly got in, started his car and turned the heater on as he started to shiver, he was way underdressed for the season, time flew by so quickly, October was ending in a week, soon it would get freezing, he had to start dressing up more accordingly to the weather if he didn't want to get sick.
The way home was quick, quicker than he would have expected, once his car parked, he takes out his back and locking the car before making his way into the house. As usual, his three maids greeted him as if he'd never left, he greeted them back and asked where his mother was, one of them responded that she was in the garden so he told the maid to go inform his mother that he was back while he went to put his things back in his room. Once he had left his belongings in his room he went to the garden to greet his mom. As soon as she saw him, she smiled. He sat next to her in a chair. She wanted to hug him after being away from her son for a month but she didn't want to fight again and she knew how he felt about hugs so he just smiled at him.

"I've missed you baby." She said softly

"I've missed you too mom." He murmured, mostly to himself but she heard him anyway.

"I'm so sorry about everything." She said "I think it's time I tell you why your sexuality bothers me so much." She added
Ciel was really surprised but he didn't say anything, he let her continue mostly because he feared that if he interrupted her now, she would never tell him. "It's not really my place to tell you that but I'm still going to do it." She said before inhaling and exhaling sharply.

"Your dad is gay; that's why it bothers me that you are gay too, it reminds of him and our marriage." She said, her voice trembling.

Ciel's eyes widened "Dad's… gay?!" he couldn't believe his ears.

"Yes, I really shouldn't be the one telling you this, he should have told you a while ago but clearly he didn't, and I don't want you to think that I hate you, you're my son and I love you, I'm done fighting, so I'm going to try my best to accept your sexuality; I'm so sorry for hurting you for so long." She said with tears in her eyes. Ciel got up from his chair and hugged his mom, the hug was brief but it still made Rachel very happy.

"Thank you mom" he replied once he sat back down. There was a long silence before he dared to speak again, in a tiny voice he asked "Is that why you divorced? Because you found out Dad was gay?"

Rachel nodded "Yes, your father told me he was gay when your grandfather died, he said he was finally free and was able to be his true self. He told me that he loved me, he always had but never like a lover, more like a sister." She paused, she was crying. "When he told me the truth, I realized our entire marriage had been a lie, our entire relationship, everything, so I asked for a divorce. I couldn't bare to be married to him one more second."

"That's why you told me that this divorce wasn't entirely your fault" Ciel stated, he understood it all now. Rachel nodded before adding "You should ask your father about everything, it's not my place to tell you, it's his. I only just wanted to explain to you why I acted the way I did." Ciel nodded again, he wanted to know more but he understood how difficult it had to be for his mother to talk about it.
They talked some more while drinking tea and eating pie the cook had made the night before until Ciel's phone started to vibrate in his pocket. 'Alois' read the screen. "Sorry mom, I have to take this." He said before getting up and going inside the house to answer.

"Hey Alois, How are you?" he asked as he accepted the call.

"Ciel, I'm so happy, Claude didn't break up with me, and he explained everything." Ciel listen to his friend speak happily about how Claude said that he was distant with the blond because of what had happened to him that he didn't want to trigger anything by touching him to much or any kind of contact that he didn't want to scare him.

"It makes sense" Ciel said once his friend was done talking.

"and guess what? He invited me to the festival at his college, the same one you're going to with Sebastian."

"Oh, that's great!" Ciel said, he felt relieved that Alois would get to go with him, that way he didn't have to be alone with Sebastian and it would make it easier not to get involved with further with the man.

"Do you want me and Claude to come get you? Or is Sebastian picking you up?"

"We agreed to meet at the entrance a little before 2, so I guess I could go with you guys."

"Perfect!" Alois exclaimed happily "We'll be at your aunt's house at 1."

"I'm not there, I moved back home" Ciel said

"oh right, I remember you telling me about it, I forgot sorry, so how are things with your mom?" he asked

"Don't worry it's okay, they're good, we had a long chat and we're okay now, I'll tell you everything about it in person later."

"Okay, well, I'll call you when were there, see you in a bit" and with that he hung up.

Ciel put his phone back into his pocket and went back to the garden to spend time with his mom. Hours went by very quickly and before he knew it, Alois was calling him telling him they were there. Ciel said goodbye to his mother before leaving the manor. The drive to the college was long, he barely talked the whole way there, Alois spent all his time singing to the songs on the radio, Ciel spent all his time looking ahead of him, through the windshield in order not to get car sick, they were almost there when he noticed Claude's hands, he had black nails, just like Sebastian. 'Fuck' he cursed in his mind, why did everything had to remind him of this man?

Once they got there, Claude parked the car and they all walked together towards the entrance. Ciel spotted Sebastian, he was leaning against a wall, waiting for him. The raven walked in their direction to close the space between him and Ciel, he opened his mouth to greet the younger male when Claude interrupted him.

"Hey Sebastian" He said

"Hello Claude" Sebastian answered, coldly. Ciel looked surprised, he didn't know the two men knew each other, he looked at Alois to see if his friend was as confused as he was but the blond didn't appear to be shocked. His friend noticed his confusion and whispered "Claude told me they had classes together."

Once they had done greeting each other, they walked inside; the whole place looked completely different from last time they were here, there were stands of foods and games and a lot of people already had arrived.
They walked past all the stands until they reached a huge stage. 'Oh right, Sebastian told me he had a friend who was going to sing.' Ciel thought.

"Sebas-chaan~~" A voice sing-songed from behind, Ciel turned around to see a gorgeous red-head running towards them, she had a black leather jacket with a red blouse underneath with red pants and high heels that matched her long hair; the way it moved when she ran was delightful, she looked like a model seen in fashion magazines. She jumped on Sebastian, hugging him tightly and, as he hugged her back, burring his face in her soft looking hair, Ciel felt a sharp pain in his chest. He felt envious, he wished he could hug the older male just as easily as the red-head had just done but sadly, it was impossible. The two friends separated and Sebastian turned around to look at him. "Ciel, this is my best friend, Grell Sutcliff; Grell this is Ciel." The woman eyed him from head to toe with disgust. "So, this is the famous boy you were so eager for me to meet." She sighed before speaking again, this time to him. "Listen brat" she said pointing her index finger at him, forcing him to back away "If you break my Sebas-chan's heart I will skin you alive."

Thankfully before he had to answer Alois stepped in and introduced himself.

"I'm Alois Trancy, nice to meet you, I love your outfit, it's absolutely stunning!" He said with a charming smile, the red-head instantly became friendlier and stepped aside chatting with Alois about clothes until Sebastian interrupted them.

"What time is your concert Grell?" He asked

"Oh, it's in an hour so we have time to eat something or play some game before it starts, you guys go ahead, I have to wait here for Will." She answered

Sebastian nodded, Alois took this as an opportunity to take Claude by the hand. "Let's go eat something" he said before dragging his boyfriend away, leaving Ciel and Sebastian alone.

"So, what do you want to do?" Sebastian asked after a minute of silence, Ciel who was looking at the floor raised his head.

"Uh, I don't know, whatever you want is fine with me." He said

"Very well, then how about we also go eat something, I'm starving, I haven't eaten all day." The demon said with a small laugh.

They walked to a small stand where Sebastian bought some noodles, Ciel didn't buy anything since he had eaten not long ago. After that, Alois and Claude joined them, Sebastian always got tense whenever Claude would get too close but neither Alois nor Ciel noticed. Alois spotted a shooting stand not far from where they were and decided his boyfriend had to win him something.

"Claude, come on, pleaaaase, I want a giant teddy bear" Alois whined pulling his boyfriend by the hand; Claude obeyed without answering.

"Do you want try this game or do you want to do something else?" Sebastian asked Ciel, he merely shook his head before replying "This is fine."

"Are you alright? You barely talk to me, have I done something to upset you?" Sebastian asked, intrigued, he couldn't think of something he might have done to offend the boy but there were still things he couldn't understand about humans so, it was a possibility.

"Yes of course I am." Ciel responded, Alois came back a few minutes later with a huge bear in his arms.

"I have the best boyfriend in the world" he sang, jumping happily.

"Why don't you go put this in the car?" Claude suggested, handing the blond his car keys. Alois agreed and dragged Ciel along to help him, once both boys were gone, he got closer to Sebastian.

"Did you here, I'm the best boyfriend in the world." He whispered in Sebastian's ear

"Stop it, I'm not in the mood for your games Claude." Sebastian spat angrily

"Oh, such anger, did you have a fight with your lover?" He asked teasingly, when Sebastian didn't reply Claude smirked but thankfully for his brother, he didn't have time to say anything more because Alois and Ciel came back. Seeing that it was almost time for the concert, they made their way to the stage, there were already lots of people so they weren't able to stand close to the podium. Grell waved at Sebastian as soon as she saw him, next to her was standing a tall man, all dressed in black, with black hair and black glasses, the only color he had besides black were his green eyes, a green similar to Grell's.

"Sebastian." The man greeted with a nod

"William." Sebastian greeted back

"Come on, stop being so cold towards each other!" Grell pouted; an announcement was made that the concert was about to begin so, Grell quickly placed a kiss on William's lips and left while screaming "I'm dedicating all the songs to you, my darling!~"

She stood on the stage proudly, electric guitar in one hand, microphone in the other, her red hair shining like flames. "This song is for you Will, my love" she said pointing to where William was in the crowd before starting to sing.

'Darling, at some point in the future
I will sleep in your cuddling hug
and we will even share the same dream.

I will casually recall and imagine
from looking at my cup of black tea
our crimson kiss and rosy secret.

In this eternity of an instant where we've just met
I'll start weaving our red string of fate...'

"Wow, she's a great singer!" Alois yelled as she finished her first song. She started the second one, also dedicating it to William, before starting to play an awesome electric guitar solo.

'The afterimage floating in the moonlit night
is my transient black memory.
In a distorting morning of disgrace
I sail a voyage of corruption…

If it's an unrequited love,
then at least let us bond in the other world...
I've been making that wish countless times,
like a beast hungry for your blood!'

Ciel was listening to the song when he heard someone say his name behind him, he turned around to find himself in front of Agni. Agni was a business partner of his father, he recalled having met the man once but only greeted him from afar, the man was Indian, he helped export some of Funtom's candy to his home town. He was accompanied by a smaller man, also Indian, he had purple dyed hair and was grinning at him.

"Ciel, nice to see you again" Agni said

"Likewise Agni" Ciel said with a small nod

The younger male said something in Hindi to which Agni nodded before speaking again. "Ciel, this is my little brother Soma, he's a big fan of your enterprise." He said to which Soma nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

"It's an honor to meet Ciel Phantomhive!" Soma spoke in a thick Indian accent, his smile never fading.

"Pleasure is all mine" Ciel replied with a polite smile, he thought his nightmare would soon be over, how wrong he was, everything was just beginning. In less than a second, Soma had practically jumped on Ciel, forcing him into a bone crushing hug, he had let his guard down and now he was paying the price. Quickly, Ciel's body started to feel like it was on fire, his heart felt like he was going to explode and he wanted to run away but there was nowhere to run, he was trapped, he couldn't breathe anymore. "St-o..p, l-e..t g..o.." he managed to choke, that's when Soma realized something was wrong and let him go, Ciel immediately fell onto the floor, eyes wide with terror.

"Ciel? Oh my god, what's wrong?!" Soma asked concerned as he placed his hands on the boy's shoulders, the poor man was only trying to help, he didn't understand that he made everything worse. Ciel started hyperventilating, trying his best to have the man let him go, but no words could get out of his mouth, as the grip on his shoulders tightened, he started to feel dizzy.

"Ciel?!" Soma screamed, thankfully the music had just stopped and Sebastian, Alois and Claude were able to hear the cries for help.

"CIEL!" Sebastian yelled anxious, trying to help the young boy but Alois was quicker. "Don't fucking touch him" He spat angrily, "Everyone, back off, no one can touch him, you'll only make everything worse." He said, glaring at Soma.

"What's wrong with him?" the Indian asked "He has Haphephobia, you idiot!" Alois yelled before turning his attention to Ciel

"Ciel? Hey, it's me, Alois, look at me, your safe, I need you to breath, inhale and exhale." He said softly, Ciel did as he was told and after a while, his breathing went back to normal. He was shaking when he got up slowly. Sebastian looked worried and Claude was smirking, as if he knew something like this would happen.

"Claude, could you please go buy a bottle of water." Alois asked firmly, the older man nodded and left. He walked next to Ciel until they found a spot where they could sit with no people around, Ciel couldn't stop shaking and kept looking at the floor without saying a word. Once Claude came back with the bottle, Alois handed it to Ciel who took a sip from the beverage, almost spilling the entire thing. After a minute Alois spoke once more "I'm going to take Ciel home." He still had Claude's keys so when Ciel got up, he stood up as well and they started walking towards the car, leaving behind a confused and worried Sebastian. In his 4 years on earth, never once had he heard of something called Haphephobia…

Haphephobia also known as (aphephobia, haphophobia, hapnophobia, haptephobia, haptophobia,thixophobia) is a rare specific phobia that involves the fear of touching or of being touched. It is an acute exaggeration of the normal tendencies to protect one's personal space, expressed as a fear of contamination or invasion, and extending even to people whom it's sufferers know well. The reactions vary depending on how much trust the person with haphephobia has with the one he/she is touching/being touch by. Some people are born with Haphephobia, while others may develop it, predominantly after a bad experience.
Hey everyone, so that was chapter 12, it's finally revealed what Ciel has! I hope you liked it even though my poor Ciel suffered. Grell had her moment to shine so that was great :D The songs she sang are her Character songs, for the ones who don't know them,you really should listen to them, they are awesome! Unfortunately I can't link them because this site doesn't let me *sigh* but the first song is : Kill in Heaven and the song one is : shinkou

Don't forget to leave a comment down below to tell me what you thought of it! and see you next time~
-Kuro~