A/N:
Just a bit of comic relief on Haruka's part. The Inners will be appearing soon, I promise!
Chapter 13:
Usagi stopped when Haruka came into view, her heart raced all she wanted to do was run and embrace the wind senshi, but the emotion ebbing off the taller blonde was strong and frightened the moon princess.
"Hai, Thank you Haruka." The greeting from Haruka almost sounded forced, so she didn't add anything to Haruka's name. It felt weird. Not having Haruka as a friend anymore, it killed her on the inside and it showed on the outside. She gripped her plate and walked to the table and sat down. Usagi chewed down on her bottom lip.
The blonde pushed aside the plate when she was done. Usagi sat there in silence it was hard to ignore the fact Haruka hated her. Eyes swelled up in tears. Why didn't Haruka just leave her to die? It's what she wanted. Her dead. Not Michiru.
"I should have been the one..." Usagi finally admitted in a hushed tone, "it should have just been me and not anyone else. Not Michiru-San and Chibi Usa." She didn't lift up her gaze she didn't want Haruka to see her tears, "you were right. I deserved it. I was such a Baka for thinking Mamo-chan..." Usagi swallowed hard he was a bitter subject "I should never of called it would of been better. Maybe Mamo-chan would of stopped." She brushed her tears away "I'm not mad at you for what you did. I never hated you...I just...hate that you hate me..."
If Haruka's guilt was a being, it would have bitch slapped her across the face by Usagi's confession. 'Oh, the fuck ups just keep rolling in don't they?' Her mind seemed to have a conscious of its own now a days and Haruka hated it, it was bad enough being told by others of her failures, faults and bad decisions but her own mind was supposed to be on her side, wasn't it? 'So, now she thinks she deserved what Momaru did and was about to do to her, boy you're a regular-' "SHUT UP!" Haruka yelled loudly without realizing it wasn't internally like she thought. "Oh shit…Sorry that wasn't toward you Usagi…it was to myself…" 'Well, now we can add psychotic to the list.' She gritted her teeth as her own mind berated her again.
"Usagi-chan…I will admit there was a point where I had a lot of hate, but not just you, I hated everyone." Haruka took a deep breath as she continued. "But that was no excuse for how I treated everyone, I did and said horrible things I very much regret. Also…. I didn't even consider how you must feel, losing daughter and fiancé or even Hotaru, losing yet another mother and best friend." Letting out a sigh, she fiddled with her toast before speaking again. "I still feel at fault for Chibi-Usa's death even though…."
Haruka set down her toast and placed her hand on Usagi's gently. "Koneko…. Listen to me, it wasn't your or my fault even though we will still feel as such, it was Momaru's fault. I don't hate you, I…." She fought back tears not wanting to cry any more than she has this past year. "I'm just…. So, so very sorry." Despite Haruka's best efforts, tears started to fall and she quickly wiped her eyes with her free hand. "Anyway, you're welcome to stay if you want, I don't mind." She gave her first genuine smile. "Setsuna called your mom last night so… she isn't worried." Haruka noticed her hand was still on Usagi's, she figured Usagi must have been uncomfortable with it, so she slowly pulled her hand away.
"I don't mind…. if you need to talk about it, I've come to realize…. maybe I do too." Haruka stared out the window noticing how overgrown the lawn has gotten. "I think it's time for me… to start closing my wounds."