Death isn't Fair
BPOV
My body was covered from head to toe in bruises form what I could see. Most of my body was wrapped up in cream colored bandages. There was a large white one that wrapped around my whole abdomen. Blood was still soaking through them.
I laid back and almost cried out from the pain that ripped though my middle. Jesse quickly covered me back up with the large quilt. Tears poured down my cheeks as I tied to hold in my whimpers.
Jesse sat on the other side of me and put his arm around my shoulders carefully. I leaned my head slowly against his chest and let out a sigh that hurt my chest.
"Oh Bella," He said looking down on me.
"I'm s-sorry," my teeth chattered as I tried to talk.
"Shh," He hushed me. "You promised me that you wouldn't go to them." He let out the sigh this time. Except it was fueled by frustration and not pain.
"How can I protect you if you don't keep your promises," He sounded like my father scolding me for not calling when I didn't come home.
"I had t-t-to," I fumbled over my words.
"Why!" He yelled and sat up straight. I whimpered at the sudden movement.
"Oh! I'm sorry Bells," He shrugged back down into his original position. He kissed my hair and started to hum a song my mother used to sing to me.
"Why Bells? Why?" He asked this time in a whisper.
"I broke the rules." I was proud that I could get the words out without stuttering.
"How, what was so bad that you had to go to the council?" He looked down at me with curiosity in his eyes.
I didn't want to answer his question, so I just closed me eyes and pretended to be asleep. I don't think he bought it because he cupped his hand ever so slightly under my chin and held it there till I opened my eyes.
He didn't let got till I opened my mouth to talk. "I did something bad," I paused, "No. I did something terrible. I did something so sick and horrifying that no punishment could make it okay," I said in a quick rush.
"Isabella what was so bad that you can't tell me?" He asked again.
Jesse was persistent; he got that from his dad. He was always asking question and always got his answer no matter how complicated the situation. But I also remembered that he never judged people for who they where or what they believed in. He got that from his mother.
I closed my eyes and sighed. "I sinned," was the only way I could put it without things getting awkward.
"What do you mean?" He asked.
I opened my eyes and looked at him seriously. "What?!" He question.
"She had sex," I heard Die from behind me.
"Ugh!" I ground at her. Brook was always so up forward with everyone and that was another thing I had learned to love and hate about her. I swear her and Jesse would be the perfect couple.
"Thanks Die," I said weakly.
"No problem Death. Although I think I am going to pay for that one once you can walk again. Right?"
"Better believe it." I said.
I heard Jesse laugh. I looked back up at him.
"That's why you got your body torn to pieces? Because you slept with someone?" He face was confused.
"Who was the lucky bastard?"
I stared up at him. His eyes where glazed with worry, confusion, and fury. His face went form amused to scared all in a matter of two second.
Looking right into his eyes I said, "Not who, but what." I whispered to him and closed my eyes.
I waited for him to back away and start cussing me out but then again Jesse always ceases to amaze me. He didn't move an inch and didn't make a noise. I opened my eyes slowly to see him looking at me.
"Oh," was his only reply as he pushed my hair back from my sweaty face.
"Oh? That's all?" I was shocked as I looked at his perfect face.
"Yeah, oh."
"Not even a 'you are a disgrace', or 'get out of my sight bitch'." I asked with my mouth in an O shape.
"Hey watch who you're talking about." He said and smiled.
"You're not mad?" My question must have taken him by surprise some how because now he was looking at me like I was crazy or something.
"What? How could you ever think I could be mad at you? I mean one look at that pretty little face of your and my heart melts. I mean I wish it would have been someone else. Like me," He smiled and I did too until a sharp pain twisted through my chest again.
"But to tell the truth Bells, I've made the same mistake." He said this time not looking at me. His eyes where focused on my hand which he was holding.
"What?" I was confused.
"Remember my trip to Sweden?" He asked and I nodded my head slightly without causing some kind of agonizing pain.
"Well my mission was to hunt down a vampire that had been causing some problems over there. I made it there in one piece. You know how I hate long flight. Anyway, I found her and tried to blend into the area." He said smiling remember some joke.
"I met her in a bar that night. I was trying to get her to let me into her circle of friends and trust me. We talked and talked. It was hours before I realized that I couldn't move from where I was to kill her.
"We ended up at her house," He paused and I looked at his face. He was staring off into space somewhere as if he was reliving what happened.
"I left her unconscious and fled back to the United States. The first thing I did was come here and tell the council what I had done." Me face froze with a horrified look.
"The pain was terrible but seeing you go through the same thing was worse." He said and looked down at my petrified face.
"Jesse," I whispered and touched his face.
I don't know what was wrong with me. I had a complete melt down. I started hugging him and sobbing so hard. I started to moan his name the word no, but he just kept clinging to my body. I couldn't bear to think of him sitting in that same room and going through the same torture that I had just experienced.
"It's okay Bells, its okay," he cooed in my ear.
I couldn't help but cry and cling to his body. I tried to calm myself down but I couldn't. I could feel the hysteria washing over me and I couldn't control it. Suddenly I felt a pinch on my left arm and my body tensed.
My arms were like jello as Jesse slid my body off of his and laid me back on the bed. He looked so burry though my eyes that I could barely see who he was.
"Get some sleep Bells. I'll be here in the morning." Jesse said then sighed.
That was the last thing I heard then everything was black again.
I opened my eyes only to be lost in a pool of molten caramel. I stared into his beautiful face and he stared back.
"Welcome back love," He said clearly.
I couldn't speak I was so taken back by his every being.
He leaned down and very simply kissed me on the lips. I closed my eyes and refused to move from this spot. This is where I wanted to be for the rest of forever.
"I don't want you to leave," He said to me and I opened my eyes only to find sadness in his.
I opened my mouth to say something but he put his finger of my lips to shush me.
"Just listen love. I want to stay with you forever. I want to be there for you without having you have to hate me. I wish you were what I am." His eyes became very serious.
"Wouldn't you like that?" He asked me.
I opened my mouth to answer him but I froze as I felt his lips touch my neck. Suddenly I couldn't think. My vision was blurry again and my mouth was dry.
"I want you to stay with me forever." He whispered in my ear.
Then his teeth plunged into my neck and I screamed.
I jolted out upright in my bed and stared at the wall in front of me. My breathing was heavy and sweat beads rolled down my face soaking my t-shirt.
"Bella? What's wrong?" I looked up to see Die sitting on the bed next to me.
"Um….." My throat was dry and it hurt when I tried to talk.
"Oh, let me go get you a glass of water." She ran into the bathroom and I heard the faucet turn on.
She rushed back into the room and I downed the tall glass of water that she had handed to me.
I cleared my throat before I looked back up at her. I knew what had to be done and I had to do it now before it was too late. I pulled the covers off the bed and my wet body. I got up and took the drenched t-shirt off.
"What are you doing?!" Die asked with a worried look on her face.
"Call the airport and pick somewhere you have always wanted to go. I don't care the cost. Don't even bother packing a bag we can buy stuff when we get there. Make sure you get the earliest flight possible." I turned around and grabbed my blue trench coat of the table.
"What are you doing Death?!" She yelled at me.
I turned around and looked her dead in the eye, "What I should have done along time ago." With those words I turned towards the door and left running bare foot through the hallways.
I made it to my car that I always kept in the parking garage. And I did it all without seeing Jesse. I got in and stepped on the gas petal.
I couldn't think straight as I sped up the winding wood path. I didn't have the music on and the car was filled with a void of silence. Every question ran through my mind. 'What are you going to say', 'what is he going to say', and 'why are you even doing this'.
I pulled in front of the giant glass house and got out. I didn't know what to do so I pulled on my sunglasses to cover up my bruised face and leaned against the car. I looked down at my coat. That was when I realized that the only thing I was wearing was the blood stained sports bra and shorts.
It was too late to chance my mind now but I did wish I would have thought this over better. Finally after a minute or two I heard the door to the house open. I closed my eyes and waited.
I didn't hear him approach me but I knew he was there. I could feel him standing in front of me. I had to face the music sometime so I opened my eyes and lifted my face slightly still keeping it covered by my hair.
He stood looking at me. His arms where crossed over his chest and his eyes where on me. He was wearing a black t-shirt that showed off the muscles in his chest, and a pair of designer jeans that were ripped at the knee. I looked at his face last. His eyes where looking over my body but his face was tense with some kind of emotion I couldn't pick out.
"Hello," I finally said softly.
"Hi," He said and nodded his head. "Come back to kill me?" He asked and raised an eyebrow at me.
"No, I came here because I have to tell you something."
"Well, how about I asked you a few questions first then you can say what you want?" He suggested politely but I knew that he didn't want it to sound nice.
"Go ahead bloodsucker." I said and buried my hands deep in my pockets.
"Okay that's one thing. Don't you even remember what happened two nights ago?" His voice rose in volume.
"That was lack of better judgment and I've paid for my mistakes." I said the last part slowly.
"What do you mean you've paid?" He said and took a step towards me. I remained where I was so I wouldn't look threatened.
I sighed and looked at him, "You really want to see what happens when our kind mixes?"
He nodded and I shrugged. I pulled my sunglasses off and tucked my hair behind both ears. I put the glasses in my pocket and then carefully untied the band around my jacket. I pulled it open to show off my bruised and battered body. My stomach had a large pulsing wound across it with stitches going through the whole length of it. It was a pretty gruesome sight.
I looked back up at his face. It was frozen with shock and what I guessed disgust. "See it's not all unicorns and rainbows in make believe land." I smiled but I could tell it didn't touch my eyes.
I leaned back up against the car and he started walking towards me. He stopped when he was about a foot from my face. "I did this?" He asked in a horrified voice.
"More or less. It was really all my fault. I was the one who asked to have it done."
"Why?!" He asked in a harsh voice.
"I broke the rules. I did more then break the rules; I mean I slept with a vampire! This is the least I deserve." I said looking into his eyes.
"No! No it's not!" He said and slammed his fist against the hood of my car. He had either arm on both sides of my head.
"What do you want Edward? Do you want me to say that I need you and that I won't leave you ever again? Well I can't do that." I said sneering in his face.
Suddenly his face broke into a smiled and I backed up slightly into my car. "What?" I finally asked.
"But you did say it." He said and smiled.
"What are you talking about?" I demanded. The truth was I knew exactly what he was talking about but I didn't want to admit to it.
"That night before you left you said and I quote 'I wish we could have met on different circumstances. Because the truth is that I'm in love with you Edward Cullen. I will be to the day I die'." He said just inches form my face.
I looked away from him but he grabbed my chin and made me look at him. "You do love me." He said smiling at me.
"Even if I do it doesn't matter anymore."
"What do you mean?" His face dropped at my words.
"I mean that we can never be together. Even if I wanted to, the council would label me a threat and kill me. Then the Volturi will take you out for getting involved with someone like me."
"You know about them?" He asked curiously.
"Of course don't you remember the stories?"
"Then we will go away somewhere." His eyes where filled with hope.
"Edward we're not going anywhere! I don't want to be with you. Going through this," I motioned towards my body, "helped me understand that there is nothing between us. There never will be!" I yelled in distress.
"But there has to be!" He yelled in my face.
"NO!" I screamed and he backed up. "Don't you understand? It doesn't matter is I am deeply in love with you. I doesn't matter if I want to be with you for the rest of forever. And even if I want nothing more then to touch you body and kiss you I can't. We can't." I took a breath and looked at him.
His eyes where closed and his arms where wrapped over his chest again. I just wanted to cry at all of this. Life was so unfair. No! Even death was still unfair.
"I'm sorry," was all I could say. "I won't be hunting you family anymore. I'm done in Forks, Washington." I looked up at the sky and a rain drop hit my face.
"Where will you go?" I looked back at his face to find the longing in his eyes again.
"I don't know. Wherever the world may take me. But all I know is I want to enjoy the time I have left."
"What?!" His voice started to show panic and hysteria. It reminded me of my mental breakdown with Jesse last night.
"I'm going to take a long vacation then finish my quota. This world has left me with scars and a broken heart. Maybe life in darkness will be better." I smiled but I knew he could see right through it.
"So this is goodbye?" He said in a small voice.
"No, I don't believe so. I mean I'll be back in fifty or so years. Maybe we will meet again in a better world." I looked at his sad face and wished that I could stay with him or he could stay with me.
"Yeah hopefully," His smiled didn't touch his pitch black eyes.
"Edward I want you to forget you ever met me. I want you only to ever remember me as the monster that killed you family and threatened you life. Don't think about it as anything more. Okay?"
"I don't know if I can do that." He said looking down at his feet.
"Try. For me, because I am going to do the exact same thing. I don't want to have to leave this Earth with memories of you. I'm sorry you have to hear that but it is true. Going through large amounts how pain helps you think clearer." I said simply.
He looked at me through piercing eyes. I felt that I could get over him but I would have to get past the part of me that didn't want to. I wrapped the coat back around my body and got ready to look at him for the last time.
"The one and only person I've ever wanted, and you end up wanting to kill me." He laughed slightly.
I took two large steps towards him and looked deep into the soul of his eyes. "Just because I'm not going to come after you doesn't mean that one of my colleagues won't." I warned him gravely.
I very carefully stretched on the tips of my toes to get to his face. I put my hand on his cheek and he leaned down so that he was at my height. I pushed his face closer to me and very delicately pressed my lips to his cheek.
Then I put my lips to his ear and whispered, "Please don't follow me, because if you do I will find the strength to kill you."
I planted my feet back on the ground and put my sunglasses back on. I didn't have the courage to look at his face so instead I started to head around to the other side of my silver Porsche. I opened the door but looked up one last time at the face that I had come to the little town on Forks to kill.
"Au voir monsieur Cullen," I said and smiled. I quickly stepped into my car before he could convince me to stay with him.
I turned on some kind of music not hearing what I was listening too, and raced down the hill and on the highway. I took the manila color folder and looked at the tag. It read Isabella Marie Swan. I opened the sunroof on the car grabbed the folder again.
The rain poured into the car and thunder downed out all sound. Without thinking I took the folder and threw it up into the air and out on the highway where it was stranded along the road only to be ruined by the rain.
"Good Isabella Swan. Hello Agent Death."
FIN