Mimi.
I shut the driver side door and sighed. I clicked the locks as Angel extended his arm. I tucked myself under his shoulder and Autumn grabbed my hand and squeezed it gently.
"Are you okay Meems?" Autumn asked as Sam wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Today is officially four weeks since Jimmy's death.
"Yes." I said sighing. I closed my eyes as they led me through the airport. We just stood together until I saw Angela. As she saw me she dropped her bags to the ground. I pulled away from my friends and ran into her open arms. She pulled back and kissed the top of my head.
"Hey Marcy." She said pulling back. Everyone laughed. "What?"
"It's Mimi now." I smiled at her.
"Okay Mimi." She looked behind me. "Where's the brat I call my little brother?" She said laughing. I felt my heart rise up to my throat.
"Angela!" Angel called from behind me. She looked over my shoulder and walked to hug him. I turned towards them. He winked at me and offered a smile. I mouthed "Thank you" and he nodded. "We missed you!" He said a little louder then needed.
"Aw. I missed you guys too!" She said reintroducing herself to Autumn and Sam whom she went to school with.
Angel slowly walked towards me as I began picking up her bags. He took one from my hand.
"It'll be okay Kiddo." He whispered too quiet for anyone else to hear but me. I nodded.
"Where are mom and dad?" Angela said as we walked through the airport doors into the parking lot.
"Puerto Rico. With Nana and Poppy." I said handing Angel a bag as I unlocked my car. He walked to the bag and threw them in the trunk.
"Wow, they must've really wanted to get away." She responded. I nodded and got into the driver's seat as Angel got into the passenger side door. "So Jimmy went with them?" I started the car and gripped the arm rest as I pulled out of the parking spot.
"No." I said as Angel grabbed my hand that was strangling the arm rest. He squeezed it gently and offered me a smile. I shifted my eyes back to the road.
"Then where is he?" She asked innocently. It almost surprised me to hear that someone truly did not know what happened. Rahway wasn't a big town so news got around really fast and everyone knew Jimmy died.
"Remember when I was little I used to get really bad nightmares?" I asked.
"Yes. About me and Jimmy dying. Then we would spend the night in you room telling stories and eating cookie dough." The light tone of her voice made me sick to my stomach. Her voice cracked as my weird question set in. "Why?"
"Angela. On the last day of school Jimmy and Graciana were driving home and they got into a car accident." I heard her breathe in shallowly and Angel held my hand even tighter. "Jimmy's dead. He died on June 24th at 1:23 am." Angela began to cry so Autumn wrapped her arms around her. Sam put his hand on her shoulder and patted Autumn's leg. "Gracie is fine except she has a huge scar down her face and a sprained wrist." I sighed and bit back tears as I turned onto Linden Avenue.
"Why didn't you tell me?" She said through tears.
"We figured it'd be easier for you to handle if you were around family and friends who have already gone through it." I said taking my hand out of Angel's and putting it back on the wheel.
"Oh." She stopped crying as I pulled into the driveway. "How do you do it?"
"Do what?" I asked.
"Talk about him without feeling like someone shot you in the heart and then sucked it out by sticking a straw down your nose?" Her now empty tone scared me. She defiantly changed while she was away. I didn't like it. She sounded emotionless. Like a robot, not like the fun loving, overly dramatic sister she was.
"Well." I paused. That was a good question. I opened my door and leaned against the car. "It's obvious that mom and dad don't help. I guess I just think that if he was like watching me or whatever he wouldn't want me to be miserable." I shrugged. "And I have amazing friends who've been by my side the whole time." Angel, Autumn and Sam all smiled at me.
Angel walked to the door as Autumn and I grabbed Angela's bags. He unlocked the door.
"You okay?" Autumn asked.
"Yeah." She put her left hand in mine and I pulled away when I felt something sharp hit my hand. I grabbed her hand. "Is that?" My jaw dropped as I looked closer at a delicate but stunning little princess cut, diamond ring.
"An engagement ring!" She whispered ecstatically as I squealed happily. "Sh!" She said laughing.
"When?" I whispered linking my arm in hers as we walked towards the house.
"Right before I came over. You are the first to know so hush up." She winked at me before she walked gracefully into my house. I rolled my eyes. I loved how her and Sam were so blissfully happy.
I sat down in my usual spot in the living room as Angela took her bags upstairs. I wrapped my arms around my knees as I heard her start crying when she reached the top of the stairs. Angel leaned over and hugged me tightly.
"When are you gonna tell them?" He asked gently.
"Well, my parents won't be back till August 16th so they'll find out then obviously. And I'll tell Angie tomorrow I suppose." I leaned my head on the back of the couch.
"What?" Sam asked pulling Autumn onto his lap. She giggled and snuggled into his chest.
"Well I turned 18 on June 25th and I've always dreamed of moving out as soon as I could but since I can't move to NYC until I finish high school Angel, Nikki and I are gonna rent a downtown apartment. We get the keys on the 23rd." Angel laughed.
"You mean tomorrow kiddo?" He asked.
"Yes." I said smiling. No school meant I had no way of keeping track of the days.
"That's great Meems!" Autumn said.
"How are you gonna afford it?" Sam asked.
"Leave it to your Fian..." She shot daggers at me, "You're boyfriend," I corrected myself, "To ask a question like that."
"I have my two jobs and Nikki does babysitting." Angel explained.
"And Mimi?" Autumn asked. CRAP! I thought as angel turned to me.
"Don't be mad." I said looking at him.
"Why would I be...?" He began but then he looked towards the piano. "MIMI!" He got to his feet.
"The highest bid is up to $75 each." I said standing up,
"I don't care! Why the hell would you do that?" He was mad. I bit my lip.
"What?" Autumn asked getting in between us.
"She sold her guitars." Angel said sitting on the couch, putting his head in his hands.
"Look, I'm..." I started but stopped as a red-eyed Angela sat down on the couch
"What did I miss?" She said trying to hide the fact that she was obviously devastated.
"Nothing really." Sam said pulling Autumn back into him. Angel placed his hand on my thigh and gently gripped it till I looked at him. "We'll talk about this later." He mouthed as Autumn kept Angela's attention with small talk. I nodded. He offered a smile that let me know he wasn't completely angry with me.
I looked back up at Autumn, Sam and Angela who were chatting mindlessly about what it was like in Iraq. I glanced at the clock. Sam caught my glance and shifted as he saw the clock.
"Autumn baby, you're curfew is ten." He said lifting her gently off his lap.
"Crap." She said. "Okay, bye guys." I got up as she gave me a hug and kissed my cheek.
"Congrats." I whispered too quiet for anyone else to hear. She smiled at me and hugged me again.
"Bye everyone." Sam said grabbing Autumn's hand and pulling her out the door. She laughed as he picked her up bridal style and carried her to his car. I smiled at them.
"I'm going to sleep." Angela announced. I nodded.
"Good night." I said giving her a big hug. "I missed you." I whispered into her shoulder.
"I missed you too baby girl." She said kissing my forehead.
"Goodnight Angie." Angel said hugging her. She nodded and walked up the stairs.
"You okay Meems?" He asked me.
"Actually, yeah." I said, surprising myself a little at my newfound strength. "I thought I'd fall apart but I'm actually okay." He bit his lip like he was thinking. "What?" I said as he left the room and walked into the basement.
"Give me a second." He said rummaging through the bookshelves. He pulled out a small blue book.
"Jimmy's old song book?" I asked feeling my heart pound. He nodded.
"I figured you wouldn't go looking through this." He opened it up and a small blue envelope fell out.
"What's this?" I said as he picked it up and placed it in my hands.
"It's from Jimmy, Mimi." He walked me over to a couch that was pushed against the wall. I sat down and slowly traced my fingers over my name in his all-too-familiar handwriting. I looked up at Angel before I opened it.
Mimi,
I started each letter the same except for yours. I know that because you are reading this something must have happened to me. I am so sorry my dear Marcela. I told you I'd always be there for you but sadly I failed you. Mimi, you are a strong girl. The strongest I know but the people around you will help you. You can let yourself hurt. Your friends love you. I love you too and I'm so sorry I left you.
I hate to have the last thing you have of me involve your past. I hate to bring up the fact that you were adopted but I must. You know you have a twin brother who we never actually tracked down 'cause it was too painful for you. Well, I found him Mimi. I didn't put his name in the letter because it is entirely up to you whether or not you want to know who he is. I was going to give you the option to find out who he was when you turn 18 so clearly if you are reading this my plan failed.
His name is written in the back of my bible. If you want to know who he is you can find my bible on the top drawer of my desk in the basement office. I love you Marcela. I am so sorry that I failed you. Take care of yourself Meems. No day but today my dear.
~James Richard Conord
I sat frozen in my spot after reading the letter for the tenth time. Part of me didn't want to know who my biological brother was but my curiosity got the best of me as I slowly got to my feet and walked to the desk in the office. I heard Angel follow me as I pulled open the drawer and grabbed an old torn up bible. I walked back to the couch and slowly fingered through the pages till I reached the back cover. There was a small envelope taped to the back cover that said Camilla on it. I rolled my eyes. Jimmy would be the only one to make it this difficult. I pulled open the envelope and held a small index card in my hands. I took a deep breath and turned it over in my hands. In the center of the index card was a name. Only three words, a small name but it made my heart stop deep in it's tracks:
Angel Miguel Shultz
I looked up at Angel who looked confused. I smiled and hugged him as tight as I could. He kissed my head.
"Are you okay Kiddo?" He asked smiling like I was insane.
"Actually, yes. Yes I am." I handed him my letter and smiled as he read it. He looked up at me and I handed him the index card.