Layla Koothrapali's POV

Dear, Layla

By the time you read this, you'll be thirteen. That is crazy and mind blowing for me to think about how you'll be already grown. You have every right to know what happened to me as I am your mother. I didn't want you to know so soon because you're very young and innocent. I thought it'd be better for you to know when you're old enough to understand.

Don't hate your father because he kept it as a secret from you. This was my choice.

I was going through breast cancer. Even before I became pregnant with you and reunited with your father.

The first time I met him was when he was with your, godfather, Uncle Howard, (your godmother is my best friend, Natasha Blaire) in the comic book store. You wouldn't believe when I tell you they were arguing about Frozen being the best movie of all time. I'm glad and quite relieved that you were never into any of those girly Disney princess type movies. Frozen is an awful movie, anyway.

Your father was kind enough to help me with my screenplay script because, as you know, he's an astrophysicist. We got along, but I had to break up with him.

After I broke up with my other ex boyfriend, I realized how much I missed being with your father. Sure, he did have a lot of flaws, but we did get to talk and hung out again. I was with your father to be with him again for one last time. I didn't mean to use him like the others believed because I do care about him and even love him after I got over the initial shock of becoming pregnant with you.

Yes, you were definitely unexpected. So not planned. Actually, I planned to abort you because I have cancer, but your father convinced me not to. He was very supportive and thrilled to be a father and he was there for me which I'm sure my previous exes would never act like that.

I want you to know that I will always love you. Never forget that, okay? Yeah, you were a surprise to us, but I still love you no matter what. Ever since I first held you in my arms.

Anyway, your father wanted me to marry him, but I wasn't ready for that. I didn't even consider us in a relationship. I don't want you to do the same things that I did. I hope you'd be much smarter than I was about dating and other life choices.

I wish I can watch you grow into what kind of a woman you'll become, but I know that my cancer is getting worse and you saw me going in and out of the hospital. Always remember to stick up for yourself when needed to (in a responsible way mind you, young lady) and to always say whatever it is on your mind no matter how much the truth hurts because people need to hear it even if they won't like it. And don't ever to be afraid your real self.

I love you, Layla Jasmine Koothrapali.

Sincerely from,

Your mother (Claire Turner)

I read my mother's letter over and over again these past days. I see how her handwriting looks and how her personality was through this letter. This makes me miss her even more. I kept my letter safely in my nightstand drawer if I would ever want to have another reread.

I've already apologized to my father and Emily. Him and I talked about it and his relationship with my mother. As for Emily, I still can never see her as my mother the same way again. I don't want to disrespect my actual birth Mom, Claire. Emily said that she never meant to replace my mother. She gave me the permission to call her whatever she wants. I guess I can still call her Mom, right? That's all I've ever seen her as. But I think just doesn't feel right.

Later, I was helping my cousin to get ready for the date she was going to have with Wyatt Hofstadter.

"Want to help me pick out a dress for the date?" Amara asked.

"Sure," I answered and she brought along these two dresses we got together.

She laid one perfectly flat out on my bed without any wrinkles and held the other one up for me to see. Two of the dresses were pretty and casual.

"Which one do you like better? This?" She asked putting it close to her body to give me the imagination of her wearing it. "Or this one?"

The one she had in her hand was blue with a floral print on it and the other was a colorful striped dress.

"The floral." I point to that one and I supposedly picked the right dress because she beamed with a smile.

"Good! I was hoping you'd say that." Amara was obviously excited about this date. Most likely because this was a new experience for her and to date an American man.

"What's going on here?" Aunt Priya asked coming into my room.

"I'm just getting ready for my date," At the mention of that, I see how Aunt Priya's face had fallen. "I'm going to meet Wyatt at the coffee shop like we did before."

"I am not happy that you're going to do this, Amara."

"Why not? You've decided to let me do this."

"Yes, because eventually we're going to go back home. Whatever this thing is you're going to have with this boy isn't going to last. It happened with me because we tried to do a long distance relationship."

"I'm going to the college here in California, Mama. And I might even get to see Wyatt more often." She looked happy at the thought even though it seems like they only met each other for a few seconds.

"Who is this Wyatt you keep talking about?" Aunt Priya asked.

"His name is Wyatt Hofstadter." I answered.

Her face looks horrified as if Amara made a mistake.

"No, Amara! I forbid you to go on this date right now!" Aunt Priya said strictly and I've never seen her this angry before.

"Why? What's so wrong about Wyatt Hofstadter? I don't care if my grandparents don't approve. Uncle Raj married who he fell in love so why can't I be with someone who I want to be with?"

Aunt Priya sighed and she didn't look happy. "Years ago, I've dated his father. Leonard. He's a friend of your father's, Layla."

Amara and I were both shocked and surprised.

"You did?" I asked.

"Yes."

"What happened? Why did you two break up?"

She looked guilty for a minute. "When I moved back to India, Leonard and I still remained in our relationship and talked to each other online. Like I said, it's hard to have a long distant relationship. I had cheated on him."

"You did?" Amara didn't expect that and neither did I. I thought it would have been the other way around. "What did you do?"

The guilt showed more on her face as she answered. "I slept with my ex boyfriend, Sanjay, at the time."

Wow.

"How could you to do that to Leonard, Mama?" Amara demanded.

"I don't know. I missed Leonard and I was mostly lonely and depressed. Sanjay and I met up again and we got carried away. It wasn't until later that I woke up the next morning I realized what a horrible mistake I've done."

"I would never do that to Wyatt or if I'll have a boyfriend," Amara was confident. "I can't cancel the date now. I don't want to stand up Wyatt."

Aunt Priya sighed again. "Alright, Amara. Just don't get so hooked up on this boy because we're going to be leaving in a couple of days."

She left my bedroom.

"I never knew that Aunt Priya and Wyatt's father dated and that he was a friend to Dad before."

"I can't believe that my mother cheated on Wyatt's father like that! I'm definitely not going to be like her." Amara said and she was still steaming off her anger from the conversation she had with Aunt Priya.

It was around four in the evening that Amara left for her date. I can't wait when I can go on dates with boys and get all dressed up for it. No boys are interested in that yet in my grade or maybe they are, but they're not interested in me.

I know only a couple of girls in my class already had dates and boyfriends. One even dated a ninth grader in some high school. So that made Monica Bennett the popular girl because she dated someone older and who was in high school. They're not together now, but she still gained the popularity.

I wish I could be beautiful like Amara and Aunt Priya and even my mother. Claire, I mean. I was able to see pictures of her and what belonged to her that Dad had allowed me to see. I was able to keep it too because he had it from me somewhere in his closet.

I'm happy that I have these things to remind me of her. There was even a picture of her in the hospital room holding me. She was looking really happy and only stared at me as I was in her arms. Dad must've took the picture.

As I'm looking through my mother's belongings, there was a knock on my door and i saw it was my ten year old little brother.

Praveen sat down on the bed with me and was looking at the picture in my hand. I'm sure he knows the whole story about my other mother.

"Is this your mother? Claire?" He said in his sign language. I'm sure the whole story got explained to him.

"Yes." I said back to him using my own hands.

He paused for a moment to think things through. I know because I saw how concentrated his look was. "So, we're half brother and half sister?"

"Mind blowing, right?" I joked.

"Yes. But you're still my sister to me. Half or full." He smiled at the end and I roll my eyes with my own smile, too.

"Thanks."

I swear, if anyone picks or teases my little brother because of him being deaf, I'm going to kill them.

"What do you think about Emily now?"

I paused for that answer. "She's still my mother and I still love her even though she was a part of the lie."

"She did always love you. It looks like it."

I feel touched at that that even someone like Praveen can even tell Emily loves me. She must love me and Dad too to raise me even though I'm not her daughter biologically.

"It's hard to see her in a different way now. I guess I should apologize to her for my behavior." I motioned my hands to him in sign language.

"Maybe that's the right thing to do."

The next day, Amara was over at my house with Aunt Priya. They've been staying here for a couple of weeks now in their hotel. Amara was having a good visit here, apparently. She's seeing the college she wants to go to and she managed to have a date.

Her and I talked about her date in my bedroom.

"Did you tell Wyatt about what happened between his Dad and your Mom?" I asked her.

"Yes. He was shocked just like I was. He said it did made sense that there was something up because his parents wasn't sure about us hanging out. I told him what happened and he didn't expect that."

"Wow. So, his parents never told him anything either?"

"Yeah. Wyatt said he wanted more, but I had to let him down," Amara said sadly. "Because I'm going back to India soon. I told him I'll be here next fall at the college. Maybe we can still see each other again."

"Don't you think you've led him on?" I asked.

"No. I liked what he had that went on and I want to see him the next time when I'm at college. I'm not going to be like my mother."

"Oh, well as long as you won't hurt him," I said. Not knowing much about relationships.

"No. He understands what I'm going through. He's really cute. He has this geeky side to him, but he's actually attractive."

Then, I had to listen to Amara rave about how great and wonderful this Wyatt guy is...ugh...

After my cousin and aunt left, Emily came to see me in my bedroom. She leaned against the doorway with her arms crossed.

"Let's say you and I can eat out together? Just the two of us. It can be a girl's night," She suggested. "We can do anything you want."

"Why?" I wondered.

She stood up straightly and enters further into my bedroom looking apologetically. "Because I want us to talk about your real mother and that I never really meant to replace her."

"You let me call you Mom. How is that not replacing her?" I asked angrily.

She looked like she really felt bad, but...I don't know what to believe.

"I know, but that's what I mean. Like I've told you before, I never meant to replace her. I've always wanted a daughter of my own and helping your father raise you...I got really close and attached to you. I do love you as if you're my own like I love Praveen. Let's talk to each other again and hang out. We would always have a lot of fun together."

I thought about it and...I guess we can start a new relationship together.

"Okay." I gave in.