Ayoooooooooo I'm back babies. Here's to the people that reviewed!
FavouriteKitten: Did I ever tell you that I love you? Because I really do and your reviews make my life. The marijuana thing came from being in the bad part of town while people were having a party. Not to sound illegal but it smells like herbal tea only fruiter which smells AWESOME. Yes, I love to share my talents and I wish you would too by updating "Love Across Time Again?"
SerenityRain2233 (times two): Hey, you don't have to review everything; I understand the whole work thing despite only being in High school. Well a Mary sue is an original character who is beautiful and perfect in every way. The main male characters fall in love with her. She usually makes the leading female characters act out of character and thus she looks perfect. Her history is ALWAYS tragic. You probably got lost because that was such a long chapter with multiple endings.
Cherrie.Checkaz: Don't worry. We're all insane here.
Angst Lover: Dear, they were OC-Mary Sues. I meant to show you that I looked at her characters for inspiration. Seriously keep working and I will too!
Asatsuyuu Nikoru: YOU GOT NUMBER THREE!! YAY LET'S THROW A PARTY…well not today, I'm typing right now.
WaterandearthAlchemist: I'm perfect!! You saying people hate me? Haha like jk jk. It is horribly true. People think that is what you want to read. Frankly, they should tone the Sues down and cart them over to Fiction Press.
While typing this I noticed that Kagome acted like an IC InuYasha while OOC and vice versa. Sango and Miroku rather did too. Opposites Attract!
Sorry if you cannot read th3 wriitiing th4t l00ksz lyke3 diis orthewayNarakutalkswhenhe'sonasugarhigh. If you review, I WILL offer a translation.
I HATE NO CHARACTERS. But Kagome and Shippo are OOC.
I also apologize for the way the four men acted. They were not themselves that day and it really is 'thurrr song."
Anime Questions Answered (you know you love it)
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Question: Why, oh, WHY must authors make anime characters OOC in fanfictions?
The group was traveling along as they always do. After all how else does a chapter in AQA start?
Kagome and Shippo were frowning with their arms crossed as they shuffled their feet. Whenever a woman walked by Kagome would growl and gash her teeth. After all, she was an incredibly jealous person and didn't want anyone near InuYasha! He was hers! She would not share as she had done throughout the series and manga.
InuYasha was skipping, giggling, and singing. Tragic pasts can't hold him down! He was also quite cocky; he knew the women loved him. No embarrassing lack of spirit with the women there.
"Dudududu we're traveling! Traveling!" he chirped happily.
"SHUT UP HIMBO! I OWN YOU!!!" Kagome screeched her usual grumpy self.
"EKKKK!! There are women here!! Ewwww!" Miroku ran desperately to catch up with the still singing InuYasha and to avoid the women.
Sango walked along very mellow, occasionally staring at Miroku's butt with lust and hunger. After all, despite her virginal looks Sango was a P.I.M.P. As she walked no emotion passed her face, there was no anger at Miroku's stupidity, no curiosity as to why Kagome and Shippo were attacking fluffy baby chicks, no concern for those poor baby chicks, and no sorrow like she always had for Kohaku. However, she had a burning urge to bear Miroku's child…
"Monk! Can I bear your child," She called to him while waving her arms. He looked at her in fear. When he saw her coming closer to his personal bubble, he began to run.
"No!!" Stay away from me!" Sango shrugged and then stopped waving her arms. If he did not want her, she was OK with that. In fact, everything was fine. She had no objections or emotions about anything.
"I wanna be a human!" InuYasha whistled happily. It was such a beautiful world! Kagome was great and he did not mind sharing his feelings with her! Shippo wasn't an annoying brat that constantly tricked him and Sango and Miroku were just dandy! Kirara was just Kirara doing her cat thing with the meowing, purring and eating evil demons.
"No one cares!" InuYasha sniffled before beginning to cry like a baby.
"Sweet,-sob- sweet, wonderful, love of my life, –sniffle- Kagome, you're s-so mean! Now hug me as you should! I w-won't object and push you away out of embarrassment."
"NO!" InuYasha cried all the harder. Miroku pet his back comfortingly. He glared at Sango and Kagome.
"It's ok InuYasha my dear friend," he said, "All women are evil!"
"That's funny," said a deep, masculine voice, "I LOVE women!" In came Jakotsu on his weekly trip into the countryside without his comrades.
"Hey Sango. How 'bout you and me meet at the local inn? Here's the key to the Sweetheart suite." Sango stood there, blinking and staring at the key.
"Nahh I don't care about anything and today is not my pimping day. I pimp on Saturdays to get us a room in an inn when we stop for the night."
"Please baby, you're breaking my heart."
"As I said I don't really care about anything."
"0MGSZ N0T E3VE3N 4B0UT KOHAKU?!!?!111two"
Naraku stood there in all his dark, Naraku glory…wearing pink. Sango blinked.
"Oh hi Kohaku. How's being a brain-washed slave going?"
"Great Sango," Kohaku said with a giant, news reporter smile, "I just LOVE killing people against my will! Back to you Master Naraku!"
"L0L TH4NX KOHAKU! IiN LYKE3 0THE3R NE3WSZ, ii H4D S0000000 MUCH SUG4' T0D4ii y0u lyke3 w0uldn't be3liie3ve3 iit! He3y d0e3s thiisz piiink shiiirt m4ke3 me3 l00k f4t?!?"
"Lyke3 0f c0ursze3 n0t!" Jesus Christ help us Sesshomaru had come around to say "liike3 hii!"
Unfortunately his dialogue continued, "W0w lyke3 t0d4y s0me30ne3 w4z lyke3 '0mg Se3sshy diid y0u kn0w gullible lyke3 iisn't iin te3h diictii0n4ry?" 4nd ii w4z 4ll lyke3 0MG RE34LLii?!? S0 ii l00ke3d iin te3h diictii0nary –ii can't be3liie3ve ii c4n re3ad wiff mii first gr4de3 re3adiin' le3ve3l- and iit w4sz lyke3 iin the3r3!!"
Shippo and Kagome smacked their hands to their foreheads before violently shaking their heads as if to say "Oh. My. God. He's stupid." Then Sesshomaru turned to InuYasha.
"he3y iit's mii f4v0riite3 br0th4!! 0mg ii l0ve3 ye3w Inu!!"
"Yay! Love is awesome! I love you too Sesshomaru!" They hugged each other with brotherly love and InuYasha cried he was so happy.
"BTW Inu k33p Tessaiga! I don't want it!"
"I don't even care about it, here!" InuYasha attempted to hand the sword to Sesshomaru who could miraculously touch it or forgot that he couldn't.
"No you!"
"You!"
"No really it's yours!"
"No you!"
"You!"
"Youuuuu!"
"You!"
"I insist!"
"Alright I'll keep it Sesshomaru." They smiled warmly at each other.
Kagome and Shippo were sitting off to the side making a list about how awful life is. While suggesting ideas Kagome sharpened the blade, she would use to kill Kikyou. God she absolutely hated Kikyou! It's obvious that Kagome would kill her!
Lifelessly Kouga, the slowest runner of the wolf clan walked up to the small dysfunctional group. He perked up when he saw his best friend InuYasha.
"Hey InuYasha," he called with obvious excitement in his voice, "Get out of the way wench." Pushing that idiot Kagome out of the way he ran-walked –emphasis on the walked- to InuYasha's awaiting arms.
"Kouga! It's soooo good to see you, my best friend, buddy, awesome pal!" They embraced each other in the way their close friendship allowed. No love-hate Yaoi there like most people think of writing only loving comradeship!
Then Sesshomaru pulled them both in for a- "GR0UP HUG!!!"
Naraku acting like his usual happy as a person on a sugar high self was bouncing up and down around the hugging –NOT YAOI PARTNERS- friends, talking rapidly.
"SoSangotheotherdayIwasplanninghowtogetalotofmoneysoIcouldgetalotofsugarsoIdecidedtostartacircuswithsquirrels!" he began so rapidly that the words blended in a nauseating way, "SoItriedtotrainmyfavoritesquirrelfoamy! Foamyfoamsatthemouthandscreeches; it'scool. ThedoctorscalleditRabies. Doesn't that sound cool?" His sugar high began to lesser and his words spaced themselves properly. Unfortunately, though he was still able to bounce and remain loud and perky.
"But when I was trying to train him to jump through the hoop of fire he bit me! It hurt but I'm ok except I need sugar and I have weird muscle spasms. Yay ADDICTION…and Rabies!'
Suddenly Sesshomaru was jumping too. "He3y Naraku, I b0rr0w3d s0m3 0v y0ur sugar!! H0pe3 yew d0n't mind!! The3n ii b0ught s0me3 fr0m a guy iin a d4rk alle3y!!! He3 s4iid y0u sn0rt iit so ii lyke3 diid and weeeeeeeeeeeeee. Thiis 'cocaine' sugar iis lyke3 awe3s0me3!!"
InuYasha being the total conformist, dependent, social butterfly that he was began to jump for joy and sugar too.
"Sugar! Sugar! Sug4r!!" Kagom frowned as she stared at their strange dance-and-song routine.
"They're like that horrible, sucky band SugarCult only they aren't a band."
"Yay we are a sugar cult! Sugar leads us!!!! And we don't have to worry about mass suicide or fake religions!!!! Woooo no Jim Jones for us," cried InuYasha happily. How did he know about a cult leader from years in the future? No idea but it sounded funny.
"Lyke3 Sugar! SUGAR!" Sesshomaru and Naraku danced in a circle while InuYasha beat the ceremonial drums of Hyper.
Jakotsu was still hitting on Sango with all his might. You have to give him props.
"Are you from Tennessee? Cuz you're the only ten-I-see," He said, pulling the pickup line that probably originated from a drunken man who had no idea what he was saying let alone which way was up.
"Might I ask what 'Tennessee' is? I don't believe it is near here," Sango asked dully without any curiosity in her voice. Jakotsu stared at her shocked at her inability to understand how much he wanted to get laid.
"Come on baby," he began again still very desperate for those two and a half minutes of so called glory, "you, me, too much crappy tasting rice sake. It's totally worth the hang over." The make up covered man wiggled his eyebrows with insinuation. Sango blinked a little confused by his insistence on feeding her.
"That's ok. I think I'll stay here; I'm not very hungry."
"Oh come onnnnnnnn. I mean your daddy must have been a baker because you've got some nice buns." Sango blinked again still a little curious as to his obsession with her body parts.
"No my father was a demon slayer. He, my brother and people I have known my entire life were killed right before my eyes. I am however not upset and I will not hit you out of rage or frustration-filled angst."
"WH3R3'Z Y00R SE3NSE3 0V ADVE3NTURE3?!" Sesshomaru asked her through his high and hallucinating state.
"I do not have one," sango replied.
"Curiosity," asked InuYasha while he beat the Hyper drums.
"No, none at all."
"W0W LiiFE3 SUCKSZ 4 yew!!!!"
Kagome was pissed at the amount of time the crazy men had wasted already. Didn't they know how much she wanted to find the jewel shards and become a hanyo or demon like everyone thought she would? Moreover, did they know that she wanted to go back to her own time and not stay with her best friends, adopted child and soul mate?
She knew the only way to handle men. Her hand fished around in the bag and pulled out….a party-size bag of candy. A holy glow filled the clearing originating from the bag.
Everyone squinted and covered their watering eyes as they attempted to see the glory.
"I-it's beautiful!" Sesshomaru, Naraku and InuYasha bowed before the candy, all of them once again crying with joy. They hugged each other and thanked Buddha for miracles.
"Shut up and eat it so we can get out of here," Shippo muttered before sitting with a pout next to Kagome. Kagome chucked the bag at them. The muscle free, not very masculine men did not catch it. Naraku hesitantly held it and dusted off the dirt.
"S0 b3autiiful, but s0 d3liicat3. ii'm s0rrii th4t ii must hurt y0u." His tears fell freely as he ripped the bag open. Sesshomaru sniffled.
"sh3 diie3d f0r 0ur addiictiion. 0h G0d bl3sszz te3h c4ndii 4nd m4y iit r3st iin pe3ace," he said solemnly in his best preach-grownup voice.
Crying even harder InuYasha and Naraku nodded. They each ate a small piece of candy.
We'll never fo-forget you! Three bags and thirty seconds later a terrible horror had unleashed itself.
"Woooo more hyper than before!!!" Shippo scowled again.
"They certainly got over that quickly, Ka-GAG-me," Shippo said, using a favorite nickname of Kagome's.
"Everyone does, Shit-poop." They sit on the ground sullenly, listening to loud, angry sex music while praying for death…delivered to Sesshomaru, Naraku and InuYasha. On the brighter, less dark, but still bad side, they had each other –even though they hated each other desperately- and could whine about things together. What could be better?
Kagome was still planning how to kill Kikyou and any other woman that encountered InuYasha. She was jealous even just of the time he was spending with men! Luckily, she had chemical sterilization to use on everyone; InuYasha WOULD NOT be able to cheat if no one had the 'drive' to. Being from the future makes life rock but not enough to make her a bright, happy, pure, enjoyable person.
InuYasha began to do the Macarena- not the famous picture of the Virgin Mary in Spain, the dance. Naraku joined in and Sesshomaru in a colorful skirt, tight, wet, bikini top, and the weird fruit hat began to shake it like a Polaroid picture.
"Oye Macarena! Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena. Ehhhhh Macarena!!!"
Kouga sat on the ground, screaming and holding a sign that said, "I love Inu-kun!!11111one234tellTHEpeopleWHATsheWORE!!!!"
"Ahhhhh, it's InuYasha," he screamed in a high-pitched voice that went right through Kagome and Shippo. They winced. Kouga screamed even louder as Inuyasha's boot-ay shook.
"W00000000000000000 Go Naraku! Go Naraku!" All four men were suddenly dressed in low riding jeans, which defied gravity by staying in place right below their bum-bums, their beautiful hair frizzed into dreadlocks, horrible afro-ed or in tight cornrows and bandanas showin' thurrrrr crip cred yo. Loud rap music played as Naraku spun in circles on his head continually.
The song 'Don't Matter' by Acorn came on.
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh dis my beat," Shouted the afro-y Miroku.
"Oh yeahhhhhh, turn dat shit up."
"Wer," replied Sesshomaru. He made a complicated gang sign by twisting his hands into pretzels. The others made the same sign back to him. He 'turned that shit up' and smiled revealing golden grills.
"Ohhhhhh yeah let's sing that bull." The men continued break dancing while singing along to the song.
"Oh Ohoohwooe Oooh ,Ooohhwooe," Sesshomaru did the song's beginning. The others joined in.
"Nobody wanna see us together But it don't matter no (Cause I got you babe) Nobody wanna see us together But it don't matter no," They all sang as they hung off each other.
"Awwww I love ya man!!" InuYasha and Sesshomaru body slammed each other like sumo wrestlers and knocked fists before fiercely hugging.
"Gemme some love son!" Miroku bear hugged Naraku and punched him on the shoulder in a friendly way.
"Ya'll always been thurrrr for me. Gotta give ya'll props."
"Yo' best son or we be puttin' a cap in yo' dome!" They all laughed.
"No I'm serious," said Sesshomaru, "I'll put this baseball cap from Kagome's bag inside your head." Naraku stared open mouthed.
"Ka-GAG-me? Why was there a radio with rap music playing in your bag?"
"I don't know Shit-poop. I listen to angry music which I hate but it's better than all that happy stuff."
Sango was staring at her friends' dilemma and strange behavior while ignoring Jakotsu's pick up lines.
"You know I...have money," Jakotsu tried, with the cheapest line in the book. She turned to him and stared.
Jakotsu was not giving up on feeding her and for the first time in her OOC life Sango was…angry and slightly confused as to why InuYasha was attempting to rap.
The unconcerned Sango whose face was always blank, scowled.
"Run! Runnnnnnnnnnnn!!! We're only 2,344 words into the story and we're already destroying the fourth wall and THE AUTHOR'S NOT MAKING US OOC ANYMORE!!" Kouga figuratively beat the fourth wall separating the real world and anime world before running his fastest to escape the flames. "Run, Run Move bitches get out of my way!! We're going to get attacked by the flames!"
He was engulfed first.
The flames roared along crackling and lighting things on fire. It screamed things such as "OOC SUX," "Stop writing!!! KagInu is teeh best and they love each other!! She wouldn't kill Kikyou!!" "You sick bastard stop writing!!" or the ever popular, "0MG You should die!!!!"
The flames attacked them all while the constructive criticism attempted to negotiate with the OOC characters and the reviewers sat by comforting them, telling them how 'awlsoime' their story was and how the flamers were just jealous.
Every single one of them was f'ed in the A thoroughly.
"Yo! Macarena!!!" shouted InuYasha as the 'I will find you and kill you if you update this story' flame wrapped around his body.
"I knew I would die in a sucky painful way," screamed Kagome as she pouted.
There were no survivors.
Flames lave only desolation and pain.
Answer: Firstly, flaming is bad. You say what you like and then what you did not like with NICE words and positive reinforcement.
OOC or Out of character is a way to put characters into a plot line or pairing they could not be in as themselves. About halfway through at least one chapter a character will act normal (thus disappointing people who like a mean, jealous Kagome or a woman hating Miroku) and the flames will attack. Justly too! No OOC stories are good (except for this one.)
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-I apologize once more for the Naraku and Sesshomaru speech. It was nearly impossible to type Retardian but I believe that I am now fluent. This probably isn't the best chapter but I enjoyed writing it.
-Please, review whether you loved it or hated it, favorite, alert, and add this to your C2s as well!
It'll make me happy and that'll keep me from abusing my friends! Do you want me to abuse them? (Yes.)
NEXT QUESTION: Why does the promise of lemons (sexual situations) rake in so many reviews?
That's right, TMA's doin' a lemon. I should get a million reviews for that.