Chap 13

Well... so from the previous chapter.. StormShadow did think the tags controlled Beach.. after all, Beach DID obey the "order" to follow the ninja when he obviously didn't want to when he first grabbed up the tags. I'm glad that at least some people got a bit sad reading of Hawk leaving him behind.

Here's the story of Beach vs Cobra.

* * * *

The Cobra base was a lot larger than BeachHead would have guessed. How a secret organization could build these giant bases in the middle of nowhere was beyond him. He stayed invisible, walking along behind his 'captor' as he passed through the lower levels. Everyone avoided the ninja, scurrying out of his path and looking fearfully at him as he walked through. BeachHead peered around curiously.

"Wow.. how the heck do you hide a place this size?" He brought himself visible and blinked at StormShadow as he entered a lift and poked a button. BeachHead grinned at him and poked four other buttons at random.

"Stop that!" StormShadow got a slight look of annoyance on his face. "Cobra has the best technology there is." He frowned as the lift stopped on one of the floors, waited a few seconds and then continued. When it stopped the second time, Beach grinned at him. "That was silly and childish, and will not delay my turning you over to your new master."

"Oh.. darn." Beach stood patiently next to the ninja, then scooted over to right next to him, within inches. "You know.. I kind of like you. You're a interesting guy.."

The ninja suddenly glared at him. "Step away from me."

Beach smiled. "Or you'll what? Come on.. hit me." He leaned a little closer, smiling under his mask. "I'm a ghost. I'm not afraid of you killin' me or nothin'. Throw a spike at me. Go ahead."

Instead, StormShadow straightened in place and stared directly ahead ignoring him. Beach sighed in disappointment. You just hadn't been ignored until you'd been ignored by a trained ninja. The lift arrived and he followed the other man down some hallways. "Where are we going? Don't tell me he's got some grand ballroom to sit on a throne, not really.." They approached a set of double doors. "Noooo... really? Doesn't he know that grandiose throne rooms are ostentatious?" He was still ignored and the guards to either side pulled the doors open as they arrived. "Good lord.. was the decorator blind or just have a bad case of gaudy?"

StormShadow approached the throne-like chair and bowed respectfully. "Cobra Commander!! I bring you a gift!"

The masked man on the chair turned a bored gaze on him then flicked his eyes to the second figure. "What is it StormShadow? Who is this? Isn't this one of GI Joe? Why is he here?"

The ninja pulled out the dog tags and offered them to the Commander. "He's a ghost.. one of the Joes that we killed in battle and these tags control him. Whoever holds the token, controls the ghost. I stole them in order to bring them to you.. giving you control of your own ghost!"

BeachHead suppressed a twitch as the maniac took the tags in his gloved hand. The gloves made it much more tolerable but he still felt that annoying tug.

"A ghost? You expect me to believe he's a ghost? What sort of drugs are you on?" The blue-clad commander stood and approached them. When he swiped at BeachHead, his hand passed through him and BeachHead jumped backwards. "What's this???"

"Don't do that!! Yeah.. ghost.. spirit, shade.. whatever." The Sergeant major crossed his arms and glowered at him. "Yeah yeah.. you got my dog tags.. good fer you."

Cobra Commander let out a creepy laugh. "Oh this is too much!! I OWN a Joe ghost! Oh yesssss... I have plansss for you!" He rushed to a control panel.

BeachHead turned to the ninja who looked pleased with the reaction he'd gotten. "Don't you get tired of hearing that ridiculous lisp all the time? Couldn't he get a speech therapist or something?"

StormShadow shrugged casually. "You get used to it after a while. I'm not here all that much anyway, he's always sending me out to do stuff." He crossed his arms and stood to one side similar to BeachHead's own stance. "You don't look all that distressed for a dead guy owned by Cobra Commander, seeing as you're a Joe. Are you a turncoat?"

"Hell no!" Beach glared at him. "You wanna ever sleep again, you won't suggest that again, either."

"No offense." StormShadow seemed a bit unconcerned.

Mollified, BeachHead sniffed slightly. "Ain't no reason to be distressed anyway. What's he gonna do, lisp at me all day?" The ninja snorted. "Just to let ya know, I still ain't happy about ya takin' my dog tags outa the cemetery.. wasn't respectful of my grave." He stared at his adversary. "A man takes disrespect to his grave sort of personal."

The ninja sneered at him. "Oh? What will you do about it?"

Beach smiled at him. "Oh.. we'll see. I gotta few tricks up my sleeve, so to speak."

"Oh? I have knives up my sleeves."

"Big danged deal.. you can't cut me, I'm formless mist, idiot ninjas.."

"I'll show you idiot.. I come from a long line of mystically trained ninja masters! I'll figure out something terrible to do to you as a spirit!" StormShadow seemed highly annoyed.

BeachHead turned to him. "Hold out your hand." Confused and wary, the ninja did. BeachHead reached out slowly and grasped it firmly in a cold handed grip. "I can be solid when I really want to." He turned loose and pointed at the ninja's chest. "What do you suppose would happen if I should stick my hand inside your chest.. then make it solid?" StormShadow's smirk vanished. "Yeah, see, I ain't gotten a chance to try that out yet, on accounta I like most of the Joe team I serve with, see? But.. you.. you disrespected my grave.. sooo you know.."

The ninja stepped backwards. "You won't get close enough to try it, Joe."

"Ya gotta sleep sometime or other. I can wait.. I got nothin' better to do. I don't age, you will. If it takes a few years to catch ya off guard... well then..." He vanished briefly then reappeared. "Best part.. no matter how good ninja eyes are.. you can't see the invisible.. and even with yer 'oh-so-great' hearing, you can't hear the heartbeat of someone who's already dead.. now can ya?" His smirk grew. "Sooo. How 'bout them knives ya got up yer sleeves?"

StormShadow scowled and stepped a few paces away. "You just stay away from me. Cobra Commander holds your control tokens!"

BeachHead leaned back, considering. "Oh yeah.. 'bout that.. I gotta go check, see what he's up to. Maybe he has some sorta commands.." He smiled at the ninja. "See you later."

He vanished, making StormShadow curse. Wandering up to the control panel, he saw the codes being put in for contacting the Pit and frowned. Cobra Commander arranged himself in a chair theatrically and waited for the Pit to answer the video call. A greenshirt answered the call then quickly transferred it to Breaker.

"Put your general on!" Cobra Commander seemed pleased with the shocked expression on Breaker's face. The Commander leaned back and toyed with the chain of Beach's tags.

Hawk's face came on and he looked highly annoyed and in a bad mood. BeachHead felt a pang at seeing his commanding officer. "What's the meaning of this?"

"Oh Hawk.. I jussssst thought I'd give you a ring.. let you know my latest plansss." Cobra Commander suddenly let go of the tags, letting them dangle. "I happen to own sssomething you lost."

Hawk's face went pale. "W-where did you get those!!" His eyes searched the screen, but BeachHead was out of sight. "You'll pay.."

The maniac let out a shrill laugh. "No Hawk! You'll pay!! YOU!!! I control YOUR Joe! I have the ghost here.. under MY command now!" He crooked a finger at BeachHead, who casually stepped into view and gave a salute at Hawk.

"Hi sir. BeachHead here." His amused tone didn't escape Cobra Commander.

"You!!! You belong to me now!!" The finger pointed at the screen. "I'll send him againssst you!! Againsst his own teammates!! YESSSS!"

Hawk looked from the insane commander to his missing sergeant. "BeachHead.. what are you doing there? Are you okay?"

BeachHead shrugged and glanced over at the hissing commander. "Well, StormShadow stole my tags from the cemetery. By the way, that place is seriously boring. And the other ghosts don't like me at all, they're pretty weird. It was creepy at night. What did you go leavin' me there for anyway?"

Hawk sighed at him. "I thought it was the best chance of you passing through the veil and all that. Are you okay?"

"Well, other than still bein' dead of course.. yeah, I'm fine. It's not as boring here.. big place. Gaudy decorations of course, but what do ya expect?" He glanced over as Cobra Commander shook the tags at him and screamed. "Oh.. he wants to tell you some more stuff, hang on."

"Sssstop that!! SSSSTOP THAT!!! You're MINE now!! You have to obey me!!!" Cobra Commander held up the dog tags. "OBEY ME!!! Go!!! Attack the Joe base!!"

BeachHead got a perturbed look. "No."

"NO!?? You can't ssssay NO!" The refusal made him stand up from his chair.

"Sure I can.. no. See? No. Oops.. said it again. You ninny. The tags don't control me at all. They just ensure I stay nearby." BeachHead shrugged a little. "Dunno why anyone would think they controlled me."

Hawk spoke up. "We'll get you out of there, Beach.. don't worry."

Beach leaned to speak back at the video pick-up. "Don't bother yourself, sir. I'm fine here. After all, you didn't want me back at the Pit. I'll just hang out here with my new buddies. They haven't met me yet here. I'm sure I can keep busy."

Cobra Commander snarled angrily. "The tags don't control you??? But.." His voice became an evil purr. "But you can't leave. Well Hawk.. I can't send him against you.. but I can keep him a prisoner. You'll have to pay heavily to get him back."

Beach snorted before the general could respond. "He doesn't want me back. If he wanted me at the Pit, he wouldn't have left my tags behind, now would he?" He spoke to Hawk again. "Don't come get me. I'll be fine here." He winked at the camera. "After all, Cobra Commander and I should have a looong talk. We'll get to know each other.. work out our differences, you could say."

Hawk looked aside and BeachHead could hear Duke's voice muttering off the audio pick-ups. Hawk suddenly brightened. "If that's how you want it, BeachHead. We'll miss you. But.. far be it for me to force you to return."

Cobra Commander growled angrily. "Stop talking like I'm not in charge!! I'm in charge here!! Me!!" BeachHead turned to him and smiled. "What are you happy about? You're my prisoner!!"

"Well, if I'm gonna be here.. let's be friends. How about I tell you some jokes?" BeachHead reached to click the button to cut the call off. "I like you.. I'll have to tell you all my jokes.. "

* * * *

Beach watched the commander rush out of the room and smirked to himself. "HEY! I'll wait fer ya to come back!" Turning and looking over the command area, he strolled over to the control panel manned by four elite Viper techs. The techs were trying manfully not to look terrified at the ghost lurking over their shoulders. "What's this do?" He pointed at a panel of controls marked "Fire control" and twisted to peer into the face of the nearest Viper.

The tech stared straight ahead and shook his head. "Classified. Step away from the control panels."

BeachHead hummed softly. "Classified? Sooo.. yer not gonna tell me?"

"Classified.. you're not authorized to know.. HEY!!!" The Viper's fruitless grab passed through the ghost's torso as Beach calmly stuck his arm through the panel. "STOP IT!! We got overloads on the panel! Someone shunt power away from the grid!! DAMN IT!"

BeachHead tutted softly as he withdrew his arm and watched the sputter and snapping sparks as the entire panel began to short out and die. "OOooooo.. tingley. So.. " He smiled benignly and pointed at another section of buttons and screens. "What's THAT panel do?"

"Get away from that!!" The techs were on their feet trying to salvage the destroyed controls. "Don't touch it!"

Giving a sigh, Beach reached out to swipe his hand through the panel and shivered as he absorbed electricity. "Well.. if yer not gonna tell me.. I gotta assume it's dangerous.. and then I gotta do stuff to it.." He shivered again as his hand dragged through the minor power conduits. "Ooooo.. dang.. that kinda feels nice.." He felt his hair stand up a bit as the power surged into his form. "Ooo.. dang..."

"GET AWAY!!" One of the guards rushed up to point a rifle at him. "Step away or I will shoot you!"

"Ha!" Beach's derisive snort made them all rather uncomfortable. "Shoot me. I dare you. Look.. I'll stand still." He spread his arms to the side and waited. "Well? Do ya need a potential threat?" He stuck a hand over a new section of board and raised an eyebrow. "I'm gonna take out this panel.. in five... four... three.. two.."

"STOP!! Step away!!" The trooper lifted the rifle to fire off several rounds.. which all passed easily through the ghost and impacted the control screens behind him and one of the techs. "Oh NO!!!"

"Yeah.. that's sorta what happens.." Beach grinned at the dead tech and the appalled troopers now converging around the control panel. "You guys aren't exactly the brightest bulbs in the box, are ya?" He suddenly had a thought and his face darkened. "While I'm thinkin' about it.. where exactly do ya'll store yer snipers? I gotta bone to go pick with them guys.."

* * * *

Cobra Commander was screaming for his ninja and StormShadow was hesitant as he appeared. "Yes, Commander?"

"GO and do something about that ghost!! He's in the sniper's training area!" Pointing down the corridor, he repeated himself. "GO do something!! You're the ninja!!"

StormShadow shook his head, wincing at the level of noise from down the hall and from his insane commander. "I can't do anything to him. He just turns into mist." He nervously tried to edge away. "I should go look up some information about how to control ghosts... that would be helpful.." Before the commander could stop him, he slipped around a corner and was gone.

Fuming, Cobra Commander stormed down to hallway towards the sounds of screaming and crashes. "I'll take care of this! I'm in charge here!! He has to obey me!!" Entering the huge training compound, he screamed loudly. "STOP THAT!! Stop killing my snipers!!! I SAID STOP IT!!"

Beach looked up happily, turning loose of the latest sniper he'd dragged out of hiding. "Oh what? Sorry.. these guys scream so loudly when I get a hold of them.. couldn't hear you. I was lookin' fer you earlier.." The sniper crawled aside, all his efforts to defend against a person who easily turned formless to avoid being hit or shot had been in vain. It had taken Beach several attempts to get the hang of becoming solid just enough to strike without having to expend the energy to be completely solid. Being pummeled by someone you couldn't hit was a supremely frightening experience.

Cobra Commander pointed at him. "You!! YOU!!! You WILL obey me! Stop killing my snipers!!"

Beach snarled underneath the mask and looked around at the half dozen scattered bodies. It was taking all of his energy he could scrape up to become solid enough to strike at people now, although he didn't want to let on. "Why should I? They killed me first!"

The commander clenched his fists and yelled. "You will stop it immediately!" He tried to stand his ground when the ghost approached him to stand there with his arms crossed and stare at him. "Yesss... you do what I tell you to do! I'm the commander here! I'm in charge.."

Beach suddenly sighed, feeling tired from the exertion. "Okay.. now I'm bored with you." He turned and walked away, passing through a wall to disappear, leaving the commander to sputter and fume at the remaining troopers.

* * * *

Beach figured out rather quickly where his boundaries were and decided the most important spot was the control area. No one seemed to want to mess with his dog tags, so they lay on the fancy desk in the control center. By the time he'd arrived back to check on them, the techs had just finished replacing the screens on the control board. He smiled to himself and wandered over, completely invisible to watch as they got it all hooked up.

One of the techs sighed and made the final connections. "Okay.. feed the power through.. we have to get this up and running before the Commander comes back." They all got more cheerful when the panel's lights all turned green. "There."

Beach suddenly appeared at his right elbow. "Aww.. look. That looks like a smudge... here.. I'll get it." His hand disappeared to the wrist through the screen and he blinked rapidly as the electric surged up into him, popping sharply and making him leap backwards and yelp as he disappeared. The techs were more concerned with the smoking ruin of their gear than the ghost who quickly reappeared across the room. Startled by the sharp pain of the electric shock, Beach composed himself quickly and watched them begin tearing the console apart to put out the minor fire he'd caused. When the panel was opened up, he saw the main power line he'd interrupted. "Guess I do got some limits as to how much power I'm allowed to touch." His quiet voice didn't reach to the Vipers guarding the doorway and he straightened himself up and looked at his hands for a second. He didn't seem to be glowing but he certainly felt like he should.

"What's all this?? What IS GOING ON!!!??" The Commander stormed in and began to berate his troops. Their weak protests that it had been the ghost, not them, didn't mollify his temper.

Beach strolled over to stand right behind the shouting madman. "Yeah.. you tell 'em C.C.!"

The shouting stopped mid-yell and the Commander jumped away from him. "Get away from me! Stop it! You're supposed to do what I command! ME!!"

"Really?" Beach reached up and scratched his ear through the balaclava. "Somehow.. that don't sound right..." He took a deep breath. "Kinda makes me unhappy that you ain't a happy guy right now.. it's kinda my fault you ain't happy. So I should really cheer ya all up again." He smiled, an evil smirk that made everyone in the room a little nervous. "How about I sing ya a little tune? I know lots of cadences.. and lots of songs.."

"No no!" Cobra Commander shook his head and held up his hands. "Don't sing.. just go stand over in the corner and.. uhh.. do something harmless... you don't have to sing..."

Beach took a deep breath. "Awww nooo.. you'll like it.. cheer ya right up. Let's start out with something happy.. how 'bout 'She'll be comin' round the mountain' as a starter?"

There was a distinct twitch and the Commander moaned. "Nooo.. I hate that song..."

Within the first ten minutes all the guards were ready to stab themselves in the ear to stop the off-key warbling. The resident ninja has appeared only briefly before retreating quickly, looking as if he needed a set of industrial hearing protection. Throwing items at the hazy figure didn't seem to even bother the dead Ranger. Everything passed right through him. If anything.. he got louder. Of course, he had to get louder to drown out the screaming from their frustrated leader. Some days it just purely sucked to work for Cobra.

* * * *

Hawk paced back and forth in his office. "This is insane.. why hasn't Breaker found out where that base is? We can't leave Beach there in Cobra Commander's hands!"

Flint sighed at him. "Trust me sir.. he's fine. What can they possibly do to hurt a dead ghost? He's probably driving everyone nuts, pointing out every paper out of place and every boot that needs shining."

Duke nodded. "He's probably fine. He didn't seem distressed at all on that video. Give it some time.. when we know where the base is, we can send SnakeEyes to steal the tags back."

Hawk sighed. "It's been over twelve hours.. I can't believe that Breaker hasn't figured out how to break the scrambling on that call."

Almost as if the name summoned him, their communications expert came rushing in. "Sir!! Call from Cobra headquarters for you sir!"

"Patch it through!" Hawk leaned over the table display. "Cobra Commander! Where's.."

The figure shouted over him. "HOW DO YOU SHUT HIM UP!?" Duke smirked widely and Flint winced. "He won't SHUT UP!!!"

Hawk cleared his throat. "Well.. you wanted him there..."

"He's driving me INSANE!! He sings off-key! He won't stop quoting regulations at me!! I can't make him shut up for even a MINUTE!! I tried having StormShadow threaten him!! HE SCARED MY NINJA!!! Even I can't scare my ninja!! Hawk!!! Make him stop it!!" Cobra Commander looked aside for a minute. "SHUT UP!!! SHUUUUT UP! Look!! Look!!! Talk to Hawk!! Yesss!!! TALK TO HIM!! Just stop that SINGING!!!"

BeachHead's voice was clearly audible. "I wanna be an airborne ranger... I wanna live a life of.. " He broke off and gave them a happy smile. "Hi Hawk sir! Is that Duke and Flint? Hi Flint! Sleep well?"

The warrant officer had to smile. Somehow it was really amusing when you weren't the target yourself. "Like a baby, BeachHead."

"Good.. that's wonderful. It's nice here, sir. I kind of like it. I think I'll stay here." He turned and smiled off camera. "What? Oh no no Cobra Commander.. yer my new buddy... I like it here." He grinned at the camera. "Hawk? Would you like anything in particular? I was thinking of asking if he'd send a few HISS tanks for a certain someone's birthday." He looked aside again. "You wouldn't mind shipping some tanks to a friend of mine, would you?"

"You're insane!! I'm not sending tanks ANYWHERE!! I'm the COMMANDER HERE!!!"

BeachHead sighed theatrically. "I see. Well.." He reached out to the 'end call' button. "I'll have to call you later, sir. I need to share my favorite song with ole' C.C. here." Just as he was switching off, they heard his voice. "You ever hear 'ten thousand bottles of beer' sung?" The scream was cut off in the middle as the screen went dark.

Duke sighed. "You know.. I'd feel sorry for Cobra Commander if he didn't truly deserve it."

Hawk shook his head. "We still need to get him out of there. Sooner or later, it's going to occur to someone that they might destroy the tags."

Flint looked startled. "What would happen if they tried that?"

"I don't know, and I don't want to take the chance."

* * * *

End Chapter

So what's going to happen? At least Beach seems remarkably undistressed over his capture.