Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

Dark Shadow

Chapter 13 – Divided We Fall

Dean couldn't believe he was being driven to an unknown destination in a car operated by his brother who, oh yeah, happened to be a Shade. As he sat back and watched the trees whip by his window, he wondered once again about the problem in front of him. Should he force Sam to go through with the ceremony Nick mentioned?

Sighing, he wished he could talk to the Shade. So far, he only had a radio station, the honking of the Impala's horn and Nick's word regarding the validity of the Shade. If you put all the pieces together he doubted you'd get a complete picture. "Ah, Sam—I don't know if you can hear me and well, to be honest I can't even imagine—you know—what you've been going through."

The horn honked once making Dean smile before continuing. "I guess I just want you to know, I'll back whatever play you—er—I mean—both of you come up with."

He wished he could see the Shade, just for a moment so he could tell how this version of Sam was really doing. He had a feeling, it wasn't very good—especially considering the only one who could see him was off hunting his brother's living self. He always knew Sam was a strong individual, but separated like this, would his brother be able to survive yet again?

As the Impala careened around another sharp bend, it came to a sudden stop with leaves and dust coating the exterior of the car. "You know you're going to have to wash her now Sammy—don't think I won't remember!"

The horn honked twice before Dean heard the doors unlock. "I can't believe I'm actually having this conversation. You know at least KITT was able to hold a conversation…" Dean paused as he realized how that might come across. "Look, just point me in the right direction so we can get this mess sorted out…"

Dean stepped out of the car and grinned as he heard Nick's voice calling to him from somewhere up ahead. Grabbing his back pack, he moved off into the forest. "Come on Sammy, time to get this show on the road."

ooooooooooooooooooooooo

Nick heard the sound of the Impala's engine followed by the horn. He patted Sam on the shoulder as he stood and called up the ravine. "DEAN! Hey DEAN! Over here!"

He looked down at Sam and sighed. Other than a slight moan, Sam remained unresponsive. The amount of power being used by the Shade must be affecting Sam. He only hoped they could get him well enough to survive the ceremony. His head snapped up as he heard a rustling in the woods above him.

"Watch that first step Dean!" Nick grinned as he saw Dean's head peering down from the edge of the ravine.

"Well how the hell did you get down there!" Dean called as he reached into his pack and pulled out a long length of rope.

"Getting down was easy, it was getting back up that posed the problem. You need to hurry Dean—we have to get Sam back to the cabin…" Nick knew Dean was going to be upset. His little brother was getting weaker and they were no closer to getting things resolved.

A moment later Dean was at the bottom of the ravine and kneeling beside his younger brother; eyes filled with concern he turned to Nick. "What happened?"

"I'm not entirely sure, but the Shade possessed your brother in order to distract the demon from hurting you. I guess the Shade knew Soaring Eagle was on the way and could repel the bastard. But after the demon was driven off, the Shade refused to give up control and brought Sam out here." Nick watched the anger flaring in the green eyes in front of him.

"Let me get this straight—the Shade, who is supposed to be a part of Sam, brought him out here with no protection not to mention no coat or basic supplies. What the hell was he thinking!" Dean ranted, wishing he could see the Shade long enough to pound some sense into him.

"That was just plain reckless, not to mention dangerous. Are you sure this Shade is really part of Sammy?" Dean added his own coat to help cover his shivering brother's body.

"Dean calm down—neither one of them are thinking really clear right now…" Nick turned as he heard a soft sob from behind him. Damn, he'd forgotten Shade Sam would be nearby. Turning towards the sound his heart almost broke at the sight in front of him. The Shade was sitting with his knees drawn up to his chest, tears flowing freely down the ravaged face. But worse was the hopeless look leaching from the hazel eyes.

"He's right, this is all my fault. Why can't I do anything right? I know, because I'm the one with the screwed up emotions and the evil freaky powers…" The Shade stood, his form flickering more now, in fact it looked like he was actually partially disappearing right before Nick's eyes.

"Ah Dean…" Nick started, but paused as he saw Dean leaning in closer to Sam, running a hand through the tangled locks as he tried to get Sam to wake up.

"Come on Sammy, sleepy time is over. We need to get you out of here before you become part of the landscape kiddo." Dean smiled as he heard a soft groan. He continued to work on getting Sam awake, ignoring everything else around him.

"He won't hear you Nick, he's got what he needs…tell him…tell him…I'm sorry…" The Shade began to back away from the men, his head lowering as he turned to move off.

"Sam, you need to stay with us! Damn it—get back here!" Nick rose and walked towards the Shade, but it only moved further off. The longing and despair in those eyes were enough to make Nick shiver.

"What's wrong Nick!" Dean called, still trying to rouse his younger brother. He could see Sam's eyes moving; hopefully he'd wake up shortly.

"It's Sam—he heard us—Oh man, he's going to leave Dean and I can't stop him." Nick turned back and was surprised at how quickly the Shade had moved. The dejected slope of his shoulders spoke volumes about what the Shade had on its mind.

"What do you mean he's leaving! SAM! Get back here!" Dean called, gently removing his arm from beneath his little brother's neck as he rose to his feet. "Nick where is he?"

Nick turned and looked at Dean sadly. "I'm sorry Dean, he's gone. He said to tell you he was sorry…"

"Just great! What else could possibly go wrong. I swear when Sam gets his act together I'm going to kick his ass!" Dean's fear and frustration could be seen in his eyes as he turned back to his brother's body. "Well, let's see if we can't get Sam back to the cabin, then I'll have to figure out a way to track down his other stubborn self."

Nick shook his head. From the look on the Shade's face, he didn't think he'd be coming back. He'd never seen Sam so upset before. His head turned as he heard a soft voice.

"Dean?" Sam whispered, his eyes blinking as he fought his way back from the darkness.

"Right here—how are you doing?" Dean knelt down beside his brother, reaching to help him sit up as he pulled the coats tighter around the young hunter.

"Ccccold—I'm sorry Dean." Sam whispered his eyes cast down as he felt his brother's arms steady him.

"What for?" Dean asked quietly.

"I wasn't strong enough—I'm not strong enough to back you up anymore…"

oooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The Shade followed Dean slowly into the forest. Possessing the car had seemed like a great idea at the time, but he could feel himself growing weaker. It was obvious possessing anything was probably using up more of his life force which meant he was weakening his corporeal self as well. He was really screwing this up.

He watched as Dean threw a rope down into the ravine and repelled down expertly. He always admired his brother's ability to get things done. As he floated down to the bottom of the ravine he noticed his live self wasn't looking too well either. In fact, he looked worse than when he left.

Nick and Dean were talking for a moments and he decided to just stay out of their way. Sitting down a short distance away he watched as Dean placed his own coat over his body. How many times had Dean given him that coat to keep him warm? If he closed his eyes, he could almost smell the leather and feel the warmth and comfort it always brought him.

"Let me get this straight—the Shade, who is supposed to be a part of Sam, brought him out here with no protection not to mention no coat or basic supplies. What the hell was he thinking!"

Sam's head snapped up at the anger he heard in his brother's voice. Anger he realized that was directed at him. He continued to listen as Dean began to question Nick further—it seemed like he was even questioning whether or not he was a part of his brother. His brother, the one he was gently trying to wake up and the one he would be taking back to the safety of the cabin. Not him, not the perpetual screw up in the family.

As Dean's anger continued to build, Sam's own self worth continued to diminish. He couldn't even defend himself, assuming there was any defense. After all, his brother was right. He should have given up control back at the cabin, then none of this would have happened. "I'm sorry Dean..." Sam sobbed softly as the tears began to flow.

He pulled his knees up to his chin, trying to make himself smaller, to disappear. This was all his fault and now his living self was probably too weak to go through with the ceremony. Maybe Nick and Soaring Eagle were wrong, if he let go, if he allowed himself to disappear—then maybe his living self would be able to survive.

He watched as Nick turned to look at him, the sympathy in his gaze was almost as painful as the words his brother had spoken in anger. He was something to be pitied, no longer a man and not even a ghost. He was nothing.

"He's right, this is all my fault. Why can't I do anything right? I know, because I'm the one with the screwed up emotions and the evil freaky powers…" Sam stood on shaky legs. He felt so tired; all he wanted was to get away, to be free of the constant worry and guilt following him around.

He heard Nick trying to get Dean's attention, but his brother had already made his choice. Why would he want to help something he couldn't see, couldn't touch, and couldn't trust? "He won't hear you Nick, he's got what he needs…tell him…tell him…I'm sorry…"

Sam had to get out of here, the pain of watching Dean with his living self was too much for him to bear. At this point, he realized he was never going to be able to feel Dean's warmth again. And if he couldn't help Dean, couldn't be a part of his life—then he didn't want to be at all.

He heard his brother and Nick calling for him to come back, but he wasn't fooled. They weren't concerned about him. He was a means to an end, to get his corporeal self back—if he disappeared in the process, so much better. His living self was right, who would voluntarily want the emotions swirling in his mind right now—he certainly didn't.

Lifting his head, he looked towards the cave where he and Soaring Eagle had spent so much time. A sigh escaped his lips as he turned and headed in the opposite direction. "I'm sorry Soaring Eagle—looks like I made the wrong choice…"

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

It had taken both Nick and Dean to get Sam up the embankment and safely into the car. After securing Sam in the back seat under some additional blankets, Dean moved to get into the driver's seat. He paused for a moment, almost expecting the car to start and move on its own. But when nothing happened, a sick feeling landed in his stomach.

He had been stupid; of course the Shade took off after listening to him basically telling him he was to blame for everything. Running a hand through his hair, he wondered if he was going to survive this. Handling one Sammy melt down was rough—handling two was almost impossible.

"Maybe Soaring Eagle can help us find him…" Nick offered, understanding Dean's frustration and fears.

Dean started the car and headed back to the cabin. "I screwed up big time Nick—none of this was Sam's fault…"

"And none of it is yours either. I still say the demon had something to do with this whole mess. Do you have any idea why he wants your brother?" Nick tried to change the subject, to get Dean thinking like a hunter again instead of a worried sibling.

Dean shook his head. "I don't know—all we can figure out is he wants Sam to be a part of some army of psychics like Sam. I don't understand why he's still after Sam now though; his psychic powers aren't there anymore."

Nick pursed his lips. "Maybe it's not the psychic abilities he's after. There must be something else, something only Sam has to make him go to this much trouble."

"He did it to weaken me—the Shade said the demon wanted me…" Sam's soft voice floated from the back seat.

Dean looked in the rear view mirror and smiled as he saw hazel eyes peaking out from the mound of blankets. "You're not weak Sam, no matter what shape you're in—don't worry, we'll figure this out."

"I know we will Dean, but what about the Shade—what happens if he doesn't come back?" Sam had been listening to his brother and Nick talk.

Dean glanced back at Sam and winked. "He'll come back Sam—after all, he's a Winchester and we never give up."

Sam smiled and snuggled further into the blankets. He hoped Dean was right, because the way he was feeling—he wasn't sure how much longer he would be able to function. Yawning he closed his eyes and once again gave into his body's need for rest.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Charlie was sitting on the log outside his cabin, waiting for his great grandfather to return. He never understood it, but he always had a sense of when his ancient relative was going to appear. Dean had called him on the walkie talkie and told him they found Sam. He'd made sure the other bed was ready to receive the wounded man before he came outside to wait.

Sure enough, a light mist began to head towards him. "Is everything prepared?"

Soaring Eagle became solid before taking a seat opposite his great grandson. "All is ready White Owl, but I fear it might be too late. I can sense Samuel's discord—he is lost and I'm not sure he will be able to find his way back in time."

Both men turned as the sound of the powerful engine reached their ears. A moment later, the black Impala pulled to a stop and two men quickly exited the vehicle. Soon Sam was gently pulled from the car and led towards the cabin. Charlie rose and helped the men get the wounded man inside.

Soaring Eagle looked up to the skies and sighed. "Great Father, I have done all that I can—I am afraid the rest lies with you."

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sam continued to walk slowly through the forest. The darkness fit his mood as he tried to quell the fear building within his breast. Each step was taking him farther from what he wanted, what he knew was right. But how could he return? He paused for a moment, indecision filling him as he looked back towards the cabin.

Before he could make a decision the pain hit him causing him to fall to his knees. Sweat ran down his face as he grabbed his head and groaned. As the pain lessened, his eyes opened and were filled with fear.

"Oh my God, Dean--NO!"

TBC

Raven524: Sorry about the little cliffie, but I've been nice for a few chapters and just couldn't help myself. The story is starting to take off—and of course my muse has been kicked into high gear, so we have another chapter for you. All reviews will be given a loving home!