Title: Pride
Author: rooster dawn
Alternative Universe
Summary: Harm and Mac act out Pride and Prejudice
Disclaimer: JAG is property of Belisarius productions, no copyright infringement intended.
Pride & Prejudice is the property of Jane Austen
(First known as First Impressions)
: Warner Brothers 1940
: BBC 1979
: Arts and Entertainment Network/BBC co-production 1995
: Universal Studio 2005
no copyright infringement intended.
Please let me know what you think, it's the only way I can write better stories for you.
Author's note: Due to a computer glich, several chapters weren't posted in their entirely. I have made the corrections. Sorry for the inconveniences I have imposed upon you.
part twelve Can There be Any Resolution
Mrs. Mackenzie observed Sarah running out of the house as she tried to calm Mr. Collins and reassure him. She saw Sarah heading towards Mr. Mackenzie's favorite outdoor place when he wanted to enjoy the beauties of nature.
It was a small park he had built neared the pond on their estate. He had placed two benches twenty meters from the pond where they used to go and view the setting sun when the girls were younger.
She smiled when she realized that was the place they both enjoyed making love when they were first married. It was probably the place where their children were conceived. No wonder why he always went there.
When she got to the small park she saw Sarah was sitting on one of the benches looking out over the pond. She could hear the muffled sobs coming from Sarah. Was it really that bad? Mr. Collins was a good man. He would take good care of her.
Why was she crying? Did this have something to do with Mr. Darcy? Was she really in love with him? She did say he was courting her. Did she really want to be with Mr. Darcy? She said she didn't like him. Why was she crying then?
Sarah had been sitting on the bench watching the ripples in the pond caused by the gentle breeze. She was wondering why her mother wanted to sentence her to a life of purgatory. Did she hate her that much?
She knew she was never her mother's favorite. That was reserved to Jordan, who was the oldest, and Mattie, who was the youngest. She was her father's favorite. Was that reason enough for her mother to hate her? Tears began to flow down her cheeks at that thought.
There was no way she was ever going to marry someone and have the type of marriage her mother and father had. She couldn't live that way. She would rather live the rest of her life alone than live with someone she didn't love.
She heard a noise coming up from behind. It must be her mother she thought. Why was she here? Why couldn't she leave her alone? She didn't want to fight with her about this. Please go away she prayed.
"Sarah! You will go back inside and tell Mr. Collins you will marry him." ordered Mrs. Mackenzie upon reaching the park.
"I can't Mama. I don't love him. I won't marry a man I don't love." Sarah cried.
"I suppose you think Mr. Darcy is going to marry you?" challenged Mrs. Mackenzie.
"I don't know, maybe. I don't even like him, but he would be much more preferable to marry than Mr. Collins." she replied.
"You will marry Mr. Collins. You owe it to your family. You will go back inside and tell him so." demanded Mrs. Mackenzie.
"No Mama, I can't marry him, I won't!" shouted Sarah.
Twenty minutes later after many unsuccessful attempts at trying to convince Sarah to accept Mr. Collins' proposal, Mrs. Mackenzie went back to the manor to have a talk with Mr. Mackenzie.
She was very upset and her nerves were in an uproar. She didn't know if they would ever be calm again. Mr. Mackenzie had to convince Sarah to marry Mr. Collins.
"Mr. Mackenzie, Mr. Mackenzie, I need you to talk with Sarah." she shrieked as she entered his library.
What now he wondered? All the girls had had a good time the other night at the ball. Even Jennifer, who was usually morose after such events, was still quite happy. Jordan had solidified her standings with Mr. Keeter.
Even his Sarah had gotten along marvelously with Mr. Darcy, a man whom she claimed to disliked greatly. What could possibly be wrong now that his wife needed to disturb him while he was reading in his library?
"What is it Mrs. Mackenzie?" he asked sighing.
"You need to come with me and talk with Sarah." she cried out hysterically.
"Why? What's wrong now?" he asked as he got up out of his chair. He sensed that his wife was upset about something. While he found some pleasure in agitating her from time to time, he didn't like to see her upset.
"Mr. Collins has proposed to Sarah. She has told him no, she refuses to marry him, and she ran off." she explained.
"So what do you want me to do about it?" he asked in a confused manner. "You know she's as stubborn as you are when she has made up her mind about something. There's not much I can do about it."
"Mr. Mackenzie!" she shrieked. "You need to talk to her, you have to convince her to marry Mr. Collins." she replied impatiently as she wondered why he was being so difficult.
"Now why would I want to do that? He's a bumbling fool. If he's worthy of having Sarah's love, he'll have to earn it himself." he argued. He never could understand his wife's line of reasoning.
"You have to talk to her Mr. Mackenzie. You must make her understand that it is her duty as one of the oldest to take care of her mother and sisters when her father dies." she argued passionately.
"I will have a talk with her, but I have no intentions of dying anytime soon. So you shouldn't worry your little head about that Mrs. Mackenzie. Where is she now?" he assured her.
"She's gone to your favorite place, the little park by the pond." she replied.
Ten minutes later Mr. Mackenzie found his daughter, Sarah, pacing back and forth between the two benches that overlooked the pond. He could see that she was quite upset, nervous, and maybe even frantic. He hated seeing his little girl so upset.
In her twenty plus years not much had ever upset her. She was an intelligent, strong, and very sensible young woman who took everything in stride, even being called only tolerable by the pompous Mr. Darcy.
"I can't marry him Papa, I can't!" she cried out as he neared her.
"There, there now. What seems to be the problem?" he asked her. He knew what the problem was, but he didn't know why she was so upset about it.
"I can't marry someone I don't love Papa. I don't even know him and ... and ... and he's such a buffoon." she wailed trying hard not to cry.
"He's a good man, and he's very respectable. He would take good care of you." he tried to reassure her.
"But I don't love him Papa. I don't want to be stuck with someone I don't love for the rest of my life." she replied. She was almost crying now.
"This isn't about Mr. Collins is it? This is about your mother and me, isn't it Sarah?" he challenged her.
She nodded her head too ashamed to say the words or to even say yes.
"My dear Sarah, marriage and love isn't about cooing and kissing or even acting silly like your sisters. It's about making a commitment to one another, raising a family together, and growing old together." he began to explain.
"But all you and Mama do is fight. You don't love her. You think she's as silly as Chloe and Mattie." she replied.
"Sarah, I do love your mother. She has given me five beautiful and very wonderful daughters. She loves you all very much and wants only the very best for you. She keeps a fine house, just ask your aunts.
She even takes care of my needs if you know what I mean." he smiled while raising his eyebrows up and down.
"Papa! That's something I don't want to even think about." she exclaimed. She was shock at such a revelation. She didn't even think people their age did those things anymore.
"What? Do you really think we stopped doing it after Mattie was born and she wasn't a boy? Sarah, I knew who your mother was and what she was about when I married her. She has never strayed or disappointed me in the twenty five years we have been married.
As you get older you will understand much better what being married and raising a family is all about. It's hard work and time consuming, but it is also quite rewarding. But it does tire you out.
As you get older one needs peace and quiet at specific intervals to keep ones sanity, even your mother needs some." he finished his explanation.
"I still don't want to marry Mr. Collins." she replied.
"Then you don't have to Sarah. If you want to wait until your Mr. Darcy decides to ask you, then that's okay too. One can love a rich prideful man as well as a poor humble one." he teased her.
"Papa! I don't even like him. He doesn't like me." she argued.
"Ah ... but you danced the whole night together at Netherfield. Aren't you the one who told Mr. Darcy that dancing was the best way for one to show their love, even if your lover is barely tolerable." smirked Mr. Mackenzie.
It wasn't very often anymore that he won a discussion with her. She had gotten very good as her mind was very sharp. She always seemed to cover all the angles of any discussion.
"Papa! He doesn't even live around here. He lives at Pemberly in Derbyshire. That's so far away. He's only here because he's visiting with Mr. Keeter." she argued.
"It's not very far when you're in love Sarah. Your Uncle Edward lived in town. He traveled all the way to Lampton to marry your Aunt Marie. That's even farther." he concluded.
"Papa, I'm never going to marry him because he will never ask me. He's already engaged to marry Ms Renee de Bourgh, his cousin, he has been since they were very young.
Then of course there is Allison who wants to marry him. And of course as you know we don't exactly travel in the same social circles." sighed Sarah.
"He told you all this Sarah? I think you're part of his little social circle now. You've lived with him for almost a week. You've seen him at least eight times besides that week over the last two months.
In my younger days that would have been consider courting. I would expect a visit from him soon. He would be asking for hand in marriage.
Until he decides to marry his cousin he's fair game for any young woman that can snare him. After the ball the other night I think he's yours if you want him." teased Mr. Mackenzie.
She was beginning to wonder if it was true. Did Mr. Darcy love her? There were so many people in her life telling her that his actions towards her were of someone in love.
But it couldn't be true. Sooner or later he would leave Netherfield, and her. He had to. His world wasn't located in Hertfordshire or at Longbourn, it was Pemberly or in town.
Monday
1 December
Longbourn
A few days after Sarah refused to marry Mr. Collins, Harriet came by to visit Sarah with some good news of her own. At least it was to her or so she thought. She was getting married. She had accepted Mr. Collins' offer to become his wife.
"I don't understand Harriet? You know he's a buffoon. He's such an idiot. I don't understand why you would want to marry him?" wailed Sarah.
"Not everybody can be as choosy as you Sarah. You're beautiful and still quite young. Some would even say you're quite silly for not accepting Mr. Collins' proposal. He is a good man, he's respectable, and he earns a good living. You can afford to be a romantic Sarah.
You can afford to wait for the perfect man to come along. I'm sure you will have other men ask you to marry them someday. Maybe even Mr. Darcy will ask you." Harriet began to explain.
"Don't say things like that even in jest Harriet. I could never love Mr. Darcy." argued Sarah.
"That may very well be true right now Sarah, but you won't find a man much better than Mr. Darcy. Sure he's a little full of himself at times, but with the understanding of a good woman I bet he could be very charming, even romantic.
But I can't be as choosy as you Sarah. I'm twenty seven years old. I'm not as beautiful as you are. My chances at getting married aren't getting any better. Mr. Collins is a good honorable man. He makes a good living and can provide for me.
There's no reason to believe that I can't be as happy with him as anyone else I might meet. You're much too young to understand anyway. As you get older you will begin to wonder if anyone will ever love you. I have nothing to offer anyone.
Mr. Collins will allow me to live my life in a manner in which I will be comfortable and happy with. Please Sarah, be happy for me." pleaded Harriet.
"I'm your friend Harriet, of course I'll be happy for you. I wish you all the happiness in the world." replied Sarah though she thought her friend was making a terrible mistake.
After Harriet left Sarah went looking for Jordan. She needed to talk to her about Harriet marrying Mr. Collins. She just couldn't understand why Harriet would marry him. She found Jordan upstairs in her bedroom crying. She wondered what was wrong.
"What's the matter Jordan?" asked Sarah.
"I just received a letter from Allison. She writes that she and the Boones have left with her brother for town. She doesn't think they will be returning to Netherfield anytime soon. She thinks they will be spending the winter in town." cried Jordan.
"I can't believe that. It won't be long before Mr. Keeter returns to Netherfield. His sister just doesn't want to live out here in the country. She likes the city and what it has to offer. He loves you Jordan." replied Sarah.
"I don't know Sarah, if he loves me he would come back to Netherfield after his business trip. What about you Sarah, Mr. Darcy left with Mr. Keeter? He won't be coming back either. You have been spending a great deal of time with him.
Everyone in Meryton has been saying what a wonderful couple you two make. You look like two people in love. Aren't you going to miss him?" asked Jordan as she tried to contain her sniffles.
"What! Don't say things like that. There is nothing going on between Mr. Darcy and me Jordan. He only danced with me because he knows me. He finds it very difficult to meet and converse with new people, you know that.
We got to know each other a little better the week I spent at Netherfield taking care of you. Allison was largely responsible for most of that because she forced him to interact with me on a daily basis.
She even got me involved as we both loved to tease him because of his proud nature. He doesn't love me Jordan." argued Sarah.
"I'll let you in on a little secret Sarah. Mr. Keeter told me about what happened between you and Mr. Darcy that week. It seems that Mr. Darcy made a comment to Allison that he liked your beautiful bright eyes and that he thinks you are very beautiful.
For the last month she has been teasing Mr. Darcy about being married to you and living with our mother. He said that Mr. Darcy never denies or defends himself whenever she teases him about it." informed Jordan.
"That's because there is nothing between Mr. Darcy and me to defend Jordan. Mr. Darcy doesn't respond to her because if he did she would tease him even more. By ignoring her she gets bored quickly and leaves him alone." argued Sarah.
"That may well be true Sarah, but Mr. Keeter also said that Mr. Darcy wouldn't let any rumor persist if they weren't true. Aren't you even going to miss him a little Sarah?" asked Jordan. She thought it would be easier for her if Sarah felt the same way.
"I'll miss Mr. Darcy as much as I will miss Mr. Collins, ... not at all." replied Sarah though she knew that wasn't true.
If Mr. Keeter wasn't going to return to Netherfield this winter, it was highly unlikely Mr. Darcy would. If he was going to stay away for the next three months this winter, why should she expect him to ever return at all?
It was more than likely she would never see him again. They didn't travel in the same social circles. They didn't really have the same connections outside Hertfordshire. Why would she expect to see him again?
There! That was the proof that Mr. Darcy didn't love her. They would never see each other again. He would not be asking her to marry him. There would be no more talks of Mr. Darcy being in love with her.
It was good then. She didn't like thinking about him. It was hard to understand why he did any of the things that he did. He was always around, but never talked. Now she wouldn't have to worry about any of that any more.