Chapter 12: A Guilty Heart

The morning sun was shining in through the all the windows, illuminating the aged wood of the floorboards with the patterns of the simple ironwork on the glass. Ginny turned over in her warm bed… what a strange dream… she frowned to herself, trying to remember what it was about, but it just slipped away like running water. She groaned a little as she forced herself to sit up. She must've slept soundlessly all night, but she didn't feel rested. She felt as if she'd been running around in the dark all night. She rubbed her sore feet, and tried to remember what she did last night…

She gave up after a few minutes, deciding that now that she was awake, she should get up. She had wanted to find Colin and see what happened when he went searching the castle last night. Or maybe even find Ron and Hermione and ask them how Harry was doing even though she was still mad at them for yesterday. So that she wouldn't have to wake the other girls, she quietly pulled on her robes and pulled her hair back in a careless ponytail. She opened the door slowly so that it wouldn't creak and tiptoed downstairs.

She was surprised when she saw that Hermione already up and sitting at a table in a quiet corner of the common room and reading a book—she must obviously be waiting for Ron.

"Good morning, Ginny," Hermione said to her brightly as she came near. Ginny leaned over her shoulder to see what Hermione was reading… only to find that Hermione was trying to stuff the book away into her bag quickly—as if it was something shameful. However Ginny was able to make out the title from the large and moldy-looking book that she was reading from… Moste Potente Potions. What on earth could Hermione possibly want from such a horrid sounding book?

"Morning," Ginny said flatly, trying to sound cheerful, but still a little angry. But before she could ask what she was doing with the book, Hermione noted Ginny's mood and tried a different approach. "I just wanted to tell you that I thought that it was incredible what you did yesterday you know."

"What do you mean?" Ginny asked in surprise.

"I mean trying running out there to help Harry like that," she answered with a smile.

"Oh–it—it was nothing," was the only think that Ginny could think to say, too embarrassed to think of anything else.

"Honestly Ginny," Hermione said, sounding so much like Mum for an instant that it almost made Ginny sigh with homesickness. "You do know that could be lying next to Harry in the hospital wing right now as well if that Bludger had hit you."

Ginny forced herself not to blush as she pushed the lovely thought from her mind. She still wanted to be mad, but it was very difficult to do that with Hermione…

"I know Hermione," she said. "But…" she opened her mouth to tell her how much it hurt her when she and Ron forgot all about her in the crowd. How she couldn't fight them, and they pushed her away from them and they didn't care.

But she couldn't. Tom had warned her not to show too much emotion to others—if any at all. So Ginny took a deep breath and turned her back on her to hide her face, "I mean it. It's nothing. I'm just glad that everyone's ok. He…" she trailed off, unable to finish. Harry just looked helpless, it must've been very painful and he was in so much danger… but no one would help him. He could've been killed. She bit her lower lip, all her feelings threatening to spill over.

"I'm glad to. Harry's all right now," Hermione said, patting her on the shoulder and once Ginny was sure that her face showed no emotion, she turned back and asked, "Really? You sure?" Ginny asked making sure she heard right.

"Yes, of course," Hermione said smiling. "It wasn't as bad as it looked…"

Ginny tried hard not to snort. That was easy for her to say. She wasn't the one who had to walk around with a rubber glove attached to her body. That idiot Lockhart had removed all the bones in Harry's arm for crying out loud! If that happened to her, Ginny knew that she would be pretty upset.

"But I'm sure that he'll be out of the hospital wing after breakfast at the latest," Hermione said quickly as she finished putting her stuff away.

"Good," Ginny said hopefully, "Listen…" she turned her attention back to the book that Hermione had just put away. "About that book…?"

"Hermione!" Ginny jumped and spun around to see Ron coming towards them, trying to stifle a yawn. "Is everything all right?" he asked sleepily.

"Yes, we're fine Ron," Hermione said, pulling the back over her should and started pushing them all towards the portrait hole as a distraction. "Are you ready for breakfast?"

"Starved!" he said eagerly.

Ginny chuckled. Ron was always hungry. Whenever he wasn't sleeping, he was eating.

On their way to the Great Hall, Ron was telling Ginny of his theory that it was Malfoy who was behind the mad Bludger. It did make some sense to Ginny—she saw how much those two hated each other, but Malfoy was so confident in those brooms… why did he feel that it was worth the risk to tamper with the Bludger as well? Everyone would surely suspect the Slytherins wouldn't they? But before she could tell Ron this, Hermione suddenly stopped behind them in front of the staffroom door.

"Hermione, what are you doing?" Ron asked, turning around, but almost instantly, Hermione raised her finger to her lips, to silence him, and with the other hand, motioning them to come closer to the door. "Look," she mouthed at them.

Ginny and Ron looked at each other in confusion before they just shrugged and leaned in closer to see what Hermione was talking about. Ginny then realized that she could hear voices coming from inside the staff room. But there was an edge to the voices somehow—fearful and worried— between Professors McGonagall and Flitwick.

As she leaned in closer to the door, she heard the voices more clearly.

"Oh dear, please don't tell me it's another attack?" Flitwick said in a gasp that sounded more like a squeak.

"Yes, I found him myself on the stairs near the hospital wing just last night. The poor boy was petrified just like that cat on Halloween. It's nothing lasting thank goodness, but I'm afraid that we won't be able to revive him until the potion is finished. Albus and I agree he was most likely on his way to visit Potter. What did it, we have no idea! The inside of his camera was completely melted…"

Ginny froze, her heart feeling as though it was about to burst out of her chest.

"Who was it?" Flitwick asked shrilly.

Hermione and Ron looked at each other with wide eyes, while Ginny just stood there motionless, unable to breathe. Hoping against hope, but also knowing the name that Professor McGonagall's was about to give…

"It was young Colin Creevey."

*Breakfast*

"Poor Colin. I can't believe that someone was attacked again so soon," Hermione said, pushing her porridge around her bowl—looking a little to queasy to eat. "And a student this time."

Ron stabbed moodily at his eggs and glared at Malfoy who was sitting at the Slytherin House table. "Look at him," he growled with disgust. "Pretending like he didn't even know what he did last night. D'you know what I think? He was in such a sore loser after the Quidditch match, he took it out on Colin!"

But Ginny couldn't answer. She felt as frozen as Colin probably was right now, not to mention the tremendous guilt that had washed over her at the very idea that she had something to do with it. It killed her inside to think that she could have done this to him, though she couldn't explain how she could've. Her strange dream last night… and the realization that she had awoken up in the Common room at around 3 in the morning last night where the only things that she knew about last night after she went up to bed. And she couldn't even remember that properly!

Hermione however pushed her food away from her and turned to Ron. "Well Ron, we should get along to the library right about now don't you think?"

"The Library?" Ron demanded in horror. "How on earth could you possibly think of homework at a time like–OW!"

Hermione had apparently kicked him under the table and his eyes began to water from pain. "Yes, Ronald… we need to go to the library. But first, I have to stop at the bathroom."

"Oh, okay," Ron hissed in confusion before Hermione groaned in frustration.

Ginny finally spoke. "Aren't you going to visit Harry this morning?" she asked innocently, hoping that they would tell her what they were talking about.

"No, we really have to get to the library," Ron said, rubbing his leg beneath the table. "Why don't you visit him? You can tell him all about yesterday."

'What's to tell?' she thought bitterly as she watched them get up. 'But then again, I could possibly ask him what he knows about last night.'

"All right," she told them as they left. Apparently they didn't even hear her as they quickly walked out the hall.

Ginny sighed as she looked down at her uneaten food—to sick to eat either. She had no idea what she was going to say to him. Although she had made some pathetic attempts, she had never actually been able to say even a full sentence to him. But she had to know what had really happened last night; she didn't know how much longer she could go before this guilt killed her. She would just have to make herself talk to him.

Unable to sit there any longer, she had pushed her uneaten bowl of food away from her and went up to the fourth floor.

"Excuse me Madame Pomfrey, can I see Harry?" she asked as she poked her head through the doorway. Madame Pomfrey got up quickly trying to block the door. "I am sorry Miss Weasley, but Mr. Potter had left just a few minutes ago. I think he should be on his way back to Gryffindor Tower."

"Oh," Ginny said, trying not to sound too disappointed.

But at that moment, all thoughts of talking to Harry were washed away as she saw the rigid silhouette of a body lying behind some curtains on the bed nearest to the door. She stared at it wide eyed, knowing full well who it was… and knowing that she had something to do with this. Her knees began to shake and waves of nausea flowed over her.

Madame Pomfrey must've noticed how pale her face was and looked at her with concern. But before that she could say or do anything, Ginny turned and ran. She ran as hard as she could through the halls, outside through the grounds, and finally stopped at the lake where she lost whatever was in her stomach.

Warm tears streaked her face as she splashed the water onto her face and she wiped her mouth. She felt that need to scream. 'What have I done?' she said over and over to herself. 'How could I have done this?'

She cried a while longer before she was able to calm down, walking along the banks of the lake—feeling as though everything inside her was frozen. Before long, she found herself walking towards the hut that rested right beside the Forbidden Forest. Needing someone to talk to… she walked quickly to the door and knocked—half wanting someone to answer/half hoping that no one was there.

But Hagrid did open his door. "Hullo Ginny," he said pleasantly, surprised to see her.

"Hey, Hagrid," she said to him, hardly noticing how miserable her own voice sounded. But Hagrid did and he frowned in concern.

"Yeh alright there, Ginny?" he asked. "Ya don't sound like yehself."

"I'm fine," she said, trying to project as much energy as she could muster to try and sound like nothing was wrong. "I'm just… what I mean to say is… I haven't been myself lately. If you're busy then perhaps I could…" she was already hoping that he would tell her yes so that she could leave.

"Oh, don't worry about it," he said brightly to her. "Would yeh like to come in?"

"Are you sure I'm not interrupting anything?" Ginny asked, suddenly struggling to remember why she wanted to be here in the first place.

"'Course not," he said, a smile warming up his bearded face. "Just 'bout to make some tea."

He showed her inside and she began to tell him what happened. He waved his large hand down just as she mentioned Colin's name. "Already know. Heard this morning."

"Oh," Ginny said grimly. "Do you know who's doing this? Do the teachers…?"

"'Fraid not," he said regretfully and Ginny noticed how sad his eyes had become—as if he was remembering something painful.

"How long have you've been here at Hogwarts anyway, Hagrid?" she asked, as Hagrid sat down, handing her tea.

Hagrid sat back a moment and thought back as he stroked his beard, "I'd say almost 'bout fifty years or so."

"Wow," she said as she took a sip. "That's a long time. Don't you ever wish that you could leave?"

He waved his hand at her and chuckled. "'Corse not. I mean, Hogwarts is me home. Could never leave it even if I wanted ter. Best years of me life."

Ginny was glad that he seemed to cheer up a little, but decided not to ask him as he sighed deeply, gazing at the overwhelming sadness in his dark eyes. "No where ter go anyway. I was expelled in me third year."

Ginny blinked in surprise. She vaguely remember hearing one of her brothers tell her about that, but before Ginny could say anything, Hagrid winced, as if he said something he shouldn't have said. "It's a long story. Sorry, but don't wish to share it righ' now if yeh don't mind," he said with a nervous tone to his voice.

Looking for a good diversion, he finally said. "Blimey, look at the time! I'm sorry Ginny, but I gotta tend to the chickens. Somethin' has been killin' all the roosters and I want ter make sure nothin' else happens."

Ginny almost choked as tea slopped down her front.

"The roosters again?" she coughed, looking horrified.

"Yes, I can't figure out how, but it's happenin' again," he said, handing her a napkin. "Now, I mus' get ter work. But we'll talk a bit later if ya want?"

"Yes, you're right. I should go," Ginny said, beginning to tremble as she got up from the table.

Ginny walked shakily back to the castle… everything that had happened in the last 24 hours was running through her mind. She had seen Colin nearly every day since she arrived here, had been sitting next to him in her Charms the whole time. How could she let this to happen? And she had forgotten about those roosters! Was she responsible for that as well? That would explain the feathers…?

The only support she could think to find was to write in the diary to Tom. He would know what to do.

Dear Tom, something awful has happened now. There's been another attack. But Tom! IT WAS A STUDENT that got attacked this time! This time it was Colin Creevey. I know I must've been sleepwalking again… and I'm afraid that I might have something to do with this.

Colin Creevey? Isn't he the Muggle-born who keeps taking pictures of Harry Potter?

Yes! And I saw Colin last night. I must've been the last person to see him before… well anyway, he was going upstairs to see Harry in the hospital wing, so somewhere along the way, whatever attacked Mrs. Norris attacked HIM!

That is unexpected.

Yes, and oh, I feel so awful about it all, Tom! We were actually starting to become friends, and now he's just lying there in the hospital wing like a statue.

But Ginny, you said yourself that he was really annoying. Don't you think that maybe you're better off…?

Ginny was shocked that Tom could say something like that and wrote quickly, He wasn't that bad. I exaggerated a bit. Ok, so he talked a lot and was a bit annoying, but that's no reason for someone to attack him! Oh, Tom! I can't remember what I did last night and I'm terrified that I might've been the one who attacked him and…

Ginny, just because you couldn't remember what you did last night does not mean that you had anything to do with the attack on Colin. I mean how could you? You would never do something so terrible, Tom consoled.

But Tom, I had a dream last night. I can't remember it too well… but I think it was about Colin. If nothing else, I might've been sleepwalking and followed him and might have seen it happen! I just can't shake the feeling that I've done something… that I had something to do with it. But I'm not sure… I can't remember…

Do you honestly believe that you would have intentionally harmed him? That you have single-handedly opened the Chamber of Secrets that one else has ever been able to find and unleashed some monster on the school to attack Muggleborns? Really Ginny. Do use your common sense.

'Tom has a point,' Ginny thought, some of her doubts leaving her. 'How could I possibly be the Heir of Slytherin? But…' she shook her head. No, if Tom was so sure that she had nothing to do with it then she couldn't have.

You're right Tom. She wrote with relief. I would never want to harm anyone. But why did it have to be my friend?

You can do better than that, Ginny, you know you can. After all, he was just the son of a milkman, and you said yourself how annoying he was. Really, what advantage would it have given you? You have to be careful about who you make friends with. I'll tell you something I learned long ago. You have to do everything on your own. You don't need people there to hold you back from reaching your goals. Do you understand Ginny?

I-suppose you're right, Tom, Ginny wrote in small handwriting. Her other hand had crept to her mouth, and she began to chew her nails. She wasn't sure of what to think. She didn't like what Tom was saying this time—but at the same time he seemed to be making some sense.

But it would have been nice to have a friend, you know, someone to talk to. Poor Colin! He even had his camera with him and I heard that it was all melted inside. What could have done that?

Something very old and dangerous. It would have taken a great and powerful wizard to control it.

So someone is doing this on purpose? She asked terrified.

Why else?

But Tom, how could anyone be so evil? To attack students like this? Basically turning them to stone? Oh, Tom, and to think that I almost went with him! With Colin I mean! He asked if I wanted to go, remember? I could have been Petrified too! And I think I've been hearing some people think that it's even Harry doing it…

You said that Harry was in the hospital at the time right? With all the bones gone from his arm? How could he do anything in that condition? It could not have been him. And you're a pure-blood. I am certain that you would have been safe.

How do you know?

If it really is the Heir of Slytherin, then he'll only be after the Muggle-borns won't he? Because that's who Slytherin wanted to eliminate from the school if I remember the story correctly. And you told me that you're pure.

Ginny relaxed slightly, glad to know that she and her brothers were all safe at the very least.

Yes, but-Tom, why is this happening? Everyone's so scared. I never thought Hogwarts was going to be like this. I thought it was going to be some of the best years of my life here. Bill, Charlie, Percy, the twins and Ron—even my parents all said that it's amazing. But it's just awful! All these years of waiting to come here, and I suddenly want nothing but to go home until they solve this whole 'Chamber of Secrets' business.

I'm afraid that it won't be so simple, Ginny. But… with these dreams you keep having, I've been fearing for your safety more than ever now. So I think that now that I need to tell you the truth. I will tell you everything I know about the Chamber of Secrets and my history with it.

Ginny was so taken aback that her quill slipped from her hand. It's true that Tom didn't like to talk about himself as much as she did. But what did he know about Chamber? If he knew anything to help her solve it… then maybe they could prevent anyone else from being attacked. Knowing that this would be important, so she picked up her quill and wrote down.

What is it Tom?

It was fifty years ago when the Chamber was last opened, which led to several people becoming petrified just like now… before it finally ended… with the killing a young girl.

Ginny gasped in terror, horrified at what she had just learned; and almost too scared to read the next few sentences.

It's only going to be a matter of time before another one is killed. It was a student who opened the Chamber of Secrets and released the monster. I know this because it was I who caught him.

(Sorry for taking so long. But my computer was infected and I had to wait forever to get it fixed. Next Chapter: Ginny goes to the Dueling Club and another attack. Find out what happens soon!)