To Walk In My Shoes

Glow60

As always thank you for your follows, favorites and especially to the ones who have taken the time to review my story. I really do appreciate it.

Just to let you know I do not know any Italian – I used Google Translate for the Italian words.

This was a hard chapter for me because I wrote it several different ways before I decided on this. I hope you like?

CHAPTER 13

Tony's Aunt Tessa

Tony was freezing his ass off and he now wished he had thought it through before he told his dad off and gave him back the car. He still had one more day in Manhattan before he could head back to Ohio. He tried several times calling his great-aunt but she wasn't answering her phone. He wished he could have called his friend Steve but he knew Steve was with his family in Aspen for the holidays. He looked up at the Manhattan winter sky and he could see a few flurries. He hoped it wasn't going to start snowing before he found a warm and safe place for him to sleep the night…

Tony tried to call his aunt one more time but she still didn't answer the phone so he decided he was going to take a chance and take the subway to nearest station next to her apartment building. Forty-five minutes later, he was standing at the front entrance to her building. He remembered she lived on the third floor so he headed up the stairs. He knocked several times on the door but there was still no answer. Tony put his head against the door. He knocked one more time before he whispered in Italian, "Si prega di zia Tessa essere a casa perché non ho altro posto dove andare." (Please Aunt Tessa be home because I have nowhere else to go.)

Tony waited a few seconds but there was still no answer. He stood there staring at the door trying to figure out what his next move was going to be because there was no way he was going back to his father's place. As he turned toward the stairs he started to hear the sound of someone unlocking a door. He turned back toward the door and was so relieved when he saw his aunt opening the door. She looked at him and asked. "Can I help you young man?"

Tony took a step forward and grinned, "Prozia Tessa ... sono io Anthony." (Great Aunt Tessa...it's me Anthony.)

She looked at him for a few seconds until she finally recognized him. "Anthony ... oh mio bambino. Guardate quanto grande avete ottenuto." (Anthony...oh my baby. Look how big you have gotten.) She grabbed him by the waist and hugged him as tight as she could. She finally released him and invited him in.

Tony grinned as he walked into the small apartment. The last time he visited his great aunt was when he was around ten years old. The place looked about the same except everything seemed some much smaller than he remembered.

Tony's aunt immediately dragged him into the kitchen and insisted that he sit at the table so she could make him some hot coco to warm him up. When it was ready she set the cup down in front of him. She noticed he was favoring his right hand so she asked him what had happened and he told her he tripped and fell. She gave him that look like she didn't quite believe him. She had him move his hand and fingers. She didn't think they were broken but she did believe one of his fingers was badly swollen. Tony knew his aunt had been a nurse in the emergency department of Bellevue for over thirty years so she knew what she was talking about. She went and got her first aid supplies. She taped his injured finger to another finger and gave him some pain pills. A little while later Tony started feeling much better.

"Now Anthony, why have you finally come to see your old aunt Tessa?"

"Prozia Tessa…I need a place to sleep tonight. Is it okay if I stay here?"

"Anthony…you know you are always welcome here. Now tell me why you have not come to visit me sooner?"

Tony took a sip of his coco. "For the last few years, my dad…had me in and out of boarding schools and summer camps. I finally graduated this year and I am now going to Ohio State University."

"You have come back to visit your father for the holidays?"

"Yes…but it turned out to be a big mistake. My dad and I got into a huge argument and I left."

She looked at his hand and pointed to it, "You call this an argument?"

Tony grinned, "Don't worry Prozia because I didn't hit my dad. I hit a wall instead."

The old woman looked seriously at him, "Anthony, you should have hit your father instead of the poor innocent wall."

They both started laughing.

For the next couple of hours Tony enjoyed just sitting there listening to his aunt tell him how all the family was doing. Around dinnertime, she decided to fix him her favorite spaghetti dish. Tony had forgotten what a good cook she was and had two servings. He offered to help her with the dishes but she made him go into the living room and watch TV while she took care of the kitchen.

While he was sitting there watching TV, he began looking around the room at all the knickknacks. It started to bring back memories of the first time he stayed in this apartment. It was almost a year after his mother died. He remembered his great aunt wasn't happy to see them. Both she and his dad started arguing in Italian. He remembered after the argument his dad walked over to him and told him he would be staying with his great aunt for a while and to behave himself. Tony remembered he didn't say a word as he watched his father leave him with another stranger…again.

At first, Tony wasn't sure what to do so he just stood there and waited for her to tell him what to do. She immediately told him to sit on the couch in the living room and not to touch anything. There was no TV in the room so she gave him a book to read. He found the book was too hard to read and put it down. He wondered how long he was going to have to stay at this place before his dad came and got him. Tony didn't remember falling asleep but he did.

The next thing he knew someone was shaking his shoulder, "Come bambino…I will make you something to eat and then you can go to bed."

Tony did as he was told and sat at the kitchen table. He began eating without saying a word.

His great-aunt stood there and watched the boy. Finally curiosity got the better of her and she had to ask, "Child…can you speak?"

"Yes."

"What haven't you said anything?"

"My dad told me to only speak when I am spoken to."

The old woman just stared at him for a few seconds, "Anthony…bambino…I am not your father and you can speak to me anytime you want."

Tony looked up at the woman, "My dad says I am to stay here with you for now. Do you know how long that will be this time?"

"Anthony…what do you mean by this time?"

"After my mom died, my dad has been dropping me off with my mom's family while he takes care of business. They got angry with him and told him he needed to start raising his own child…"

Tony was brought back from the memory when he heard his great-aunt moving around the living room. She was collecting all the family photo albums and boxes of pictures and putting them on the coffee table. Tony grinned because he knew his great aunt was into the DiNozzo family genealogy. He knew for the next couple of hours he was going to be occupied looking at all the family pictures and listening to his great-aunt talk about the DiNozzo family history. He really didn't mind because he always enjoyed listening to her.

Aunt Tessa sat down on the couch and showed Tony a very old picture of a man and woman on their wedding day, "Anthony, these are your grandparents…Roberto and Maria DiNozzo. Roberto was my younger brother and your father's father."

She handed him a picture of his dad when he was just a little boy. Tony couldn't get over how much he and his dad favored each other. She continued to show him some more pictures of his dad at different ages. Seeing these pictures of his dad, made Tony curious about something and he decided to ask her, "Prozia Tessa…can you tell me what you and my dad were arguing about the day he dumped me on to you? Was it because you had to take care of me for a while?"

She looked at her nephew. "No…il mio bambino, I have always enjoyed your company. I was angry with your father because he never gave me any kind of notice. He never called me. He just dropped you off and left. I had nothing in this house for a child your age and that was why I was angry with him. If your father had asked me earlier I would have had a room ready for you and maybe a TV but I had nothing to offer you."

Tony smiled and said, "That's my dad for you."

"Anthony…when your father was a little boy your grandparents spoiled him rotten. I tried to warn my brother and his wife it was unhealthy for a child to have everything but they wouldn't listen to me. They bought your father anything he wanted and sent him to the finest schools. When your father graduated from college he went into buying and selling land and made a fortune in it. He used the money to make more investments. He never once offered any of that money to his parents. My poor brother and his wife worked up till the day they died."

She opened an album and showed Tony a couple of pictures of his father with different women. "Your father loved the women and was always chasing them. I guess you already know about that since he has been married so many times?"

"Did he every love my mother?"

She smiled, "Unconditionally…your mother had him wrapped around her little finger. He wanted to marry her the moment he saw her but she told him she would not marry him until he gets a steadier job."

Tony looked shocked, "My dad giving up the entrepreneur life style?"

She grinned, "Anthony…would you believe your father once managed a bank in Manhattan and he was very good at it."

"So what happened to the job?"

"After a couple of years he got bored. He finally quit and went back to buying and selling land and traveling all over the world looking for the next great deal. Your mother decided to let him be because she loved him. When your mother became pregnant with you your father promised he would stay around New York so he could be closer to home when you were born."

Tony needed to know, "Did…did my dad want me?"

She looked at him and wasn't sure if she really knew the answer or not. She decided to tell him what she knew. "I remember the day you were born. The labor pains had started early in the morning hours. Your dad called his mother and she called all the other DiNozzo family members to let them know you were on the way. We all met at the hospital and waited to welcome our newest family member. When I arrived, I found your father in the waiting room just pacing back and forth. I had never seen him like that before. When he saw me he begged me to find out what was taking so long. Once the staff realized I was a nurse they let me stay with your mother. She was in labor for more than twelve hours. Anthony…would you believe I was the first DiNozzo to welcome you into this world. You were such a beautiful bambino. While the doctor was taking care of your mother I got the honor of introducing you to your father. When I tried to hand you to him he backed off and refused to hold you. He said he was afraid he was going to drop you…"

Gibbs couldn't believe what he was hearing. How could you not want to hold your own baby? He remembered the nurse almost had to pry Kelly from his arms…

Back in Ohio…

It was the day after New Years when Libby finally returned to college. She found Tony at one of the basketball courts practicing. She tried to sneak up behind him and grabbed his waist but Tony immediate removed her hands from him. He told her politely that he didn't want to see her anymore and asked her to leave. When she tried to ask him what happen, he told her that is seems he is too immature for her and that she should not waste her time with him. He suggested she look for someone more mature like his dad…

For the rest of the school year he concentrated only on his classes and practice. On the weekends he worked part-time at a local restaurant in downtown Columbus. Tony never realized it before but he seemed to have knack with the women customers because they were always leaving him big tip…

Final Four - before losing to UCLA.

Three years had passed and Tony was in Washington DC for the final four. He was nervous and couldn't sleep. He decided that he needed to go for a walk. Maybe it would help him to get his head straight. He told his coach that he would be back in a little while.

After Tony had walked several blocks, he could hear someone screaming. When he turned the corner he saw a woman screaming that her babies were still inside the burning building. Tony didn't hesitate to run inside.

There was smoke and fire all over the place. He tried yelling to see if he could get an answer. Finally he heard a little boy yelling for help. He found Jason hiding in a closet. He picked the boy up and started carrying him toward the stairs. The boy started screaming for his sister. Tony set the boy down. He turned and headed toward the little girls room but part of the ceiling fell down in front of him. He didn't see anyway around it.

He realized at that moment there was nothing he could do without endangering both the boy's and his life. If he had been by himself he might have chance it but he couldn't let both children die trying to save one. He decided it was time for him to take the boy and leave. As he was leaving he could hear the little girl screaming and then she finally stopped. He tried not to think about it anymore he would just focus on getting the boy to safety.

Once he was outside he handed the boy to his mother. The moment he looked at her he could tell she knew. She hugged her son tighter and tears flowed down her face.

"I…I am so sorry ma'am."

Just then several firemen ran past him with a hose. Two paramedics ran to the boy and his mother. Another one guided Tony to one of the waiting buses so he could be checked out. He insisted he was okay. A little later the paramedics released him, before he left he tried to talk to the boy's mother to let her know how sorry he was but the boy started calling him a coward for not saving his sister. His mother tried to stop her young son but she couldn't. Finally one of the paramedics gave the boy something to calm him down. He told Tony they needed to leave so they could get the boy to the hospital and have him checked out.

Tony took one last look at the boy and then back to the mother. His eyes were watering, "I…I am so sorry ma'am."

"Son…there was nothing for you to be sorry about. I…I know you did the best you could to save both of my children. My son just doesn't understand right now."

Tony just stood there and watched as they closed the doors to the bus and left. One of the policemen who watched the whole scene felt sorry for the young man and offered to drive him back to his hotel.

The coach met him in the lobby and was getting ready to chew Tony's ass out when he noticed something was not right. Tony smelt like smoke and he could see what looked like some minor burns on his face and hands. When he tried to ask Tony what happened, all the younger man did was start crying. The coach reached out and hugged him.

"Son…what's wrong."

"Coach…I couldn't save her. She was only four years old and I…I couldn't…save her."

"Tony…what are you talking about?"

"There…there was this fire in a townhouse. I got the brother out but I couldn't get his sister. I can still hear her screaming and then nothing. Coach…I don't know if I can ever get those screams out of my head."

The next day of the game the coach benched Tony because he knew the younger man had not gotten any sleep and was in no condition to play. The team put up a good fight but finally lost to UCLA.

A month had passed and Tony was invited to attend a ceremony in honor of him for saving the life of Jason King. Tony declined the offer because he really didn't feel like a hero. He felt more like a failure. There was not a night that went by without him hearing that little girl's screams.

Gibbs couldn't help but feel bad for the younger Tony. He knew what is was like to try and save someone and fail in the attempt. It had happened to him many times while he was in the military and a few times while he was working for NCIS. It always hurt most when it involved children.

Buckeye Vs. Michigan

It was the last year of college and Tony's football team was getting ready to play Michigan…