Well, what can I say? Writer's block sucks. And the only way I know how to deal with writer's block is to look else where for inspiration. . .in this case, another anime. Actually, two. My first muse was Inuyasha, which is currently airing on Cartoon Network (one of the most hilarious romantic comedies I've ever seen, animated or not!). My second, and still going strong, was Trigun (Vash-san is such a stud muffin. I can't believe I had the chance to look into this before and chose not to!). I strongly recommend both of these to anyone who's into anime; they're well worth your time. At any rate, I was finally able to get my creative juices flowing again, and this is the outcome. It's hardly good enough to make up for the long wait, but I suppose it'll have to do. But believe me, this is far from over. . .

And hey, I've started posting some of my artwork at mediaminer.org! If you're at all interested, go check it out. I'm under the same penname of course.













Part XII: Strong Enough













If blood will flow when flesh and steel are one

Drying in the colour of the evening sun

Tomorrow's rain will wash the stains away

But something in our minds will always stay

Perhaps this final act was meant

To clinch a lifetime's argument

That nothing comes from violence

and nothing ever could

For all those born beneath an angry star

Lest we forget how fragile we are

On and on the rain will fall

Like tears from a star like tears from a star

On and on the rain will say

How fragile we are how fragile we are

Sting ~ Fragile











Obstinate, impudent, unruly minx. . .

Lines of thesaurus related insults continued to plague Cell's mind as he stared into Adina's unyielding face. At first, his brain refused to believe what had just happened. To think that this woman whom he had shared so much with might go so far as to actually spit on him, on his pride. . .it seemed like a distant memory that had never occurred. In fact, it felt so unreal, that he would have just moved on entirely, as though nothing had happened at all. . .

But by that time, it was too late. Her insolence had triggered his volatile nature; as distant as it might have been, it didn't matter. Rage pumped through his veins, roared in his ears, and clouded his vision with red.

How dare she provoke him with such disrespect? Had she forgotten who she was talking to?

No, she hadn't. And the fact that she still rebelled against his power, with all her fearlessness and emotional strength, only made the salt in his open wound sting even more.

Murderous intentions apprehended his rationale, rendering him helpless to his own actions. Relenting, he could only watch as his hand shot out in front of him, and curled around her delicate throat. In a single, effortless motion, he raised her into the air, leaving her body to dangle helplessly above the ground.

Adina choked as her air supply was so abruptly cut off, and she unconsciously gripped Cell's wrist with both hands.

"C-Cell, I can't-"

"Shut up."

Squinting her eyes open, Adina glared down his outstretched arm into his callus eyes. Out of all the arguments and conflicts they had embarked on, not once had he ever told her to "shut up". It both surprised her, and maddened her at the same time. His change in demeanor was nothing short of dramatic, compared to his usual cool and collected attitude of the past. She had expected as much, but to result to such petty informalities was not like Cell at all, no matter how short his fuse was. Perhaps his manners had gone down the drain with his sanity. . .?

Quick to soothe his raging instincts from reaching their peak, Adina fought to execute the words from her stuttering mouth that would much rather breathe then speak.

"If you kill me now. . .t-then you'll never. . .find out. . ."

Lack of oxygen would not allow her to finish the sentence. Through a dizzy haze, she saw his upper lip curl over his freakishly white teeth, a low growl resounding in the back of his larynx. His hesitation obviously meant that he was debating inside his head whether or not to let her go or snap her neck in two. At this point, Adina was far too disoriented to care which hand fate would deal her.

The next thing she knew, she was sprawled out on the marble ground, her throat contracting with desperate gasps for air. Her eyes, screwed shut, burned with moisture from the strained effort, but they never escaped their confinement of stretched flesh. She would not allow Cell to think he was so potent as to reduce her to false tears.

"Perhaps from now on, you should keep your distance, human. As of this moment, I cannot not be held accountable for what your actions might provoke out of me."

A wave of de ja vu washed over her, as she remembered being in a similar position not more then a day before. When had "inflicting pain on Adina" become habitual in their daily routine?

And when had she suddenly been reduced to a mere human again?

"I have a name Cell. . .," cough, wheeze, "You would do well to use it. Especially in light of the current circumstances."

A slight pause was the only warning she received before his next words slammed into her, shattering all previous grudges.

". . .perhaps when I feel you are more deserving of my respect. . .

"Human."

Pause. Blink.

". . .excuse me?"

But Cell was already walking off, leaving her to dwell on his words with a heavy conscious.

She should have been outraged. She should have marched right after him and given him a piece of her mind.

But she wasn't.

And she didn't.

Instead, she sat bolt upright, staring at his retreating back with all the confusion the world had to offer her.

WHY wasn't she angry?

That self-important android was in no position to be demanding anything after what he'd just done, especially respect, and yet here she was, feeling as though she owed it to him. She hated that feeling more then anything. He deserved nothing from her, and she knew that. He knew it too, but half the time he chose to ignore that little tid bit, because ignoring it was so much easier then acknowledging it. In some ways, he was more of a coward then even she had thought him to be.

She didn't know how many times she had been telling herself this before she inwardly sighed in frustration and buried her face in her hands.

WHY wasn't she angry?

If he only knew the amount of torment he was putting her through. . .

It took a few more minutes of self pitying before the solution finally came to her. The thought made her stomach turn in sickness, but as it currently stood, she had no other option to take. And something was always better then nothing.

Usually anyway.

Adina inhaled deeply, summoning all the courage she had to offer into one spot in her chest. She barely felt herself rise to her feet, nor did she feel the cold smoothness of the marble beneath her feet as she glided over to Cell's prone form, preparing herself for the unexpected. He look up disdainfully as she approached, the emotion written on his face clearly stating 'I am not in the mood, so please go away.' She was in no position to abide by such a request, however, and proceeded to stand in front of him on sturdy, unyielding legs. The android scowled at her, severely annoyed by her defiance.

"What do you want?," he asked harshly. Adina closed her eyes briefly, collected her thoughts, then opened them again.

Well, here goes nothing.

"Cell, I want you to hit me."

For the second time within the span of an hour, Cell's eyes mirrored that of a deer-caught-in-headlights as he gaped down at the tiny, fragile female standing before him.

"W-what did you just say?"

"You heard me."

"But. .I. . ."

His mouth mimicked silent words he wanted to say, but couldn't. The proposition to strike her had left him feeling nothing short of bewildered. Granted, having a chance to smack her around a little had been a secret desire of his from the very start, but. . .

She actually wanted him to hit her? On purpose?

Distantly, he saw her place her hands on her hips and begin to tap her foot impatiently.

"Are you going to just stand there all day stuttering or what?"

Cell's face faltered, shifting from shock to irritated irresolution.

"Perhaps you might help to clarify your motives. . .?"

Adina sighed, and her eyes lowered to the ground for a moment. When she looked up again, her gaze held firm - almost as firm as the straight line her mouth was set in.

"Look Cell, I know that right now you have a lot of pent up rage inside of you that's just itching to get out. And I also know that I am the source of most of it. Don't bother asking me why, because I don't know myself, but. . .I feel I need to make it up to you somehow, regardless of the fact that you got what you deserved."

At her last comment, Cell's eyes darkened.

"Tell me, why is it I deserved such a vulgar, disgraceful gesture from you?"

Her expression softened some what. Her voice was solemn when she spoke.

"Cell, you violated me in the worst possible way. You took something that held so much meaning and turned it into a sinister weapon to use against me! You degraded what we shared because your pride felt threatened by my humility."

Silence. His stunned expression was all she needed to confirm her inner suspicions.

Cell. . .

You didn't even realize, did you? You had no idea what you were doing to our bond. You thought it was all a game, just like every other tangent between us.

It looks like you still have a lot to learn about emotions, android.

"No."

Adina started, refocusing her attention on his face. His usual mask of indifference was reenforce, but it was tainted with the barest hint of feeling that he was trying desperately to hide.

"No what?"

"I won't strike you."

Some part of her felt extreme relief, which puzzled her. She should be angry, not relieved. She put on her best scowl and tried to act infuriated.

"And why not?! After all the grief you've put me through, don't you think - "

"Are you so quick to forget all the grief you've put ME through?"

To this she had no retort, rendering her speechless. She had no choice but to listen to his verbalized thoughts.

"And after all we've been put through together, I don't think it would take a wise man to know that marring you would be aweless. . .not to mention crude. I only wish you had been so kind as to show me the same respect."

How is it, that he can jump from being a vulgar buffoon to a revered gentleman so quickly?

Damn. He was making her feel more and more guilty by the minute, something she decided he was getting way too good at doing.

"You didn't have a problem with hurting me a minute ago Cell. Why the sudden change of heart?"

"A minute ago I was ridiculed beyond anything I've ever imagined. Naturally, my instincts took over. My judgement was clouded by anger."

"Hn. Then you know how I felt when you violated me."

"That kiss couldn't have possibly meant that much to you?"

Adina winced.

Couldn't have. . .meant that much to. . .?

Something about the tone in his voice, and the scorn on his face. . . Why did it hurt so much?

Why did his words hurt her so much?

". . .Cell. . .I told you. A kiss is something that should be shared between two people who care deeply about each other, as I thought we did. Clearly though, the feeling was not mutual."

"I never said that."

"You're right, you didn't. You didn't say anything. You wanted me to bear what was unspoken so it would save you the struggle of trying to bear it yourself. So how am I supposed to know for sure what you were feeling, if you were feeling anything at all?"

Adina paused her rant, and waited for the android to respond. He did, but in a very different way from what she had anticipated. And it almost cost her dearly.

Cell's face, which had been void of all feelings, was contorted into an unknown expression. As if the emotions were completely foreign to his expressions. Regardless, it left her feeling strangely elated. Perhaps because she was indeed proud to have such an affect on the machine. . .or perhaps because no man alive had ever looked at her the way he was then.

"You're really shook up about this," he said. It was more of a statement then a question. She hated it when he assumed he knew exactly what she was thinking; she hated it even more when he was right.

"What of it?," she snapped.

Oh. . .why was he looking at her that way?

And why wouldn't he stop?

". . .there's more, isn't there?"

She was becoming flustered now. That wasn't a good sign.

"What are you talking about?"

"There's more to it then that. I may not be accustomed to human interplay, but I do know that they only react fiercely to a situation if they have a strong, emotional tie to it somehow. . ."

"Cell please. Don't blow this out of proportion. Please."

". . .and when they feel exposed, they become defensive."

"I'm not defensive! I'm offended by your invasive assumptions!"

"If they were really just assumptions, then you wouldn't get worked up about them so easily, would you?"

Feeling as though she was left with no other escape route, Adina glared at him through half-slit eyes, shooting daggers and venom and anything else she could muster in his direction.

"Lech."

Cell smirked in triumph.

"That's what I thought."

Adina 'hmphed' lightly, and directed her attention to the crystal clear sky over head. Spontaneously, she wondered that if she were to defy gravity, and fall up instead of down, would she drown in that endless sea of blue? The depressed artist side of her wanted to think so - at least then she wouldn't have to deal with this endless torture.

"So what is it?"

Adina slapped her hand against her forehead, and slowly drug it down her face.

Appearing calm on the outside was becoming a chore. It was all she could do just keep from exploding in his face as a row of curse words strung along the rim of her brain.

"So what is what?"

"What is it that has you reacting so fiercely to our kiss?"

At this, Adina ceased all activity, and slowly rose her head to look over at him. The expression on her face was that of pure bewilderment.

"I. . .I don't know," she confessed, to both herself and the android.

Why HAD she reacted so strongly to their kiss? Sure, it had been intense to say the least, but a kiss is still just a kiss. . .isn't it?

No Adina, you know better then that. Sometimes, a kiss is not just a kiss, and this was one of those times. Oh. . .but that just complicates things even more!

On the outside looking in, it seemed that the woman had turned into a manikin. She suddenly stood frozen, her eyes as big as marbles, her mouth condensed into the shape of a perfect 'o'.

A single question drilled through her skull, and mercilessly burned her psyche.

Co. . .could it be that. . .I'm. . .

. . .in love with him?

The idea was absolutely, positively absurd.

Yet. . .it was the only thing that made any sense at all. . .

Slowly, as her mind struggled to come to terms with this new shed of light, her gaze slid over to fix on the android. Her face softened, and quite unconsciously, her lips moved over the silent word that she had never intended to say out loud.

"Love. . ."