Dinner Date

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Thisis my AU version to the events when Demming has dinner catered by Hung's China Sea, complete with the candle light. Sometimes, a candle provides the light that is needed to get you out of the dark. Based on a prompt and request from mbeckettcastle or JC. This is for you, I hope I do it justice. There will be ANGST, Tons of it, if this is not your story, Thanks, hope you find what you're looking for.

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

Chapter 13

Previously

"Can you answer me a question please, and before I forget it, Thank you both for the call, I can't say as I blame you for anything, it was me and my team who acted totally unprofessional, and for that I apologize.

"You wanted to ask a question Detective" Alexis prodded

"Yes, you spoke to your father, is he well, I mean is he*"

"Kate, Gina here, if you want to know if he's in love with you still, the answer would be yes, but he's away to purge you out of his life and his system. Even Rick has his limits on how much he will allow his heart to break.

Have a good evening Detective, and again, we're sorry and good luck" as the line goes dead.

She grabbed the journal and recorded the call, at the end she put in block bold letters, CASTLE LEFT TO PURGE HIMSELF OF ME, as the tears began to fall once again.

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GREYBROOK HOUSE

London England

Thursday 2:00 PM Local Time

Rick could hardly believe himself when the car pulled up in front of a very sophisticated building that resembled more of a palace, he noticed Katherine with a huge smile on her face,

"Face it Rick, You're Gobsmacked, I got you, this is home, or will be if you approve. We just have to go over a few details with the selling agent." Her smile could light up the city, she had out done herself finding him the very best of the best.

"WOW, Katherine, is this where they are leasing our apartments?"

"No Silly, that would be a waste of money, they purchased them this morning with my approval, I hope I didn't over step Rick, but if you check it out, and don't like it we can find something else"

"Cricket, are you crazy, what's not to love, my God they didn't spare any expense did they" as he picks up the brochure and reads quickly

A five-bedroom duplex Penthouse of 4,599 sq. ft on fourth and fifth floors with two roof terraces featuring 360-degree roof-top views of central London. Exquisite Master Bedroom with In-Suite Bathroom and Walk-In Dressing Room. There are a further four Double Bedrooms, all with In-Suites. The apartment also benefits from a separate Staff Flat of 748 sq. ft and lift access to all floors. Greybrook House is a grade II listed, Art Deco building designed by Sir John Burnett and Partners. Redeveloped to an exceptionally high standard, the interior of Greybrook House reflects the Art Deco theme found on the exterior of the building and at Claridge's opposite. The interior architecture and interior design has been expertly crafted by the renowned Fenton Whelan Design team.

"We can take the tour and if you're sure I'll call the movers to bring the furniture and your personals."

Rick can't help but notice how huge his space his, there is a separate apartment, not large, but laid out and looked exquisite,"

"What this Cricket?"

"Oh, this is my flat, or Apartment if you're using American terms"

"Cricket, why is my flat seven times larger than yours? I mean I see 9 Bedrooms altogether, even if my family came to visit, that would be 3 Bedrooms Max, why so big?"

"You have to have an Office with different views Silly, that way if you're not in the mood in one room perhaps the other office will spark you" she laughed her deep laugh.

"Do you like it Rick, is there anything you don't like?"

"Just one thing that bothers me" Rick watches as Cricket's face is full of concern,

"That is what Rick?"

"Why your apartment is so small, my God look at all the room, and I don't want to sound like a pretentious Ass, but I'll get lonely and lost in that big place all to myself."

"The only time you'll be by yourself is when you request it, even bedtime Rick, When and if you say the time is right, till then I will sleep in my flat, but sleep is about all I'll do there"

Rick blushes, "Cricket, I am flat*"

"I know Rick, I said when or if you're ready OK? No pressure, as she tiptoes up and kisses his cheek innocently."

"OK, order the trucks to come then Cricket, let's get Gobsmacked together" as she starts to laugh at his use of the slang.

"OK, We'll have to let Paula know this will be our last night at the hotel, I think she is going to have a hissy when she knows he arrangements, is that OK with You, Rick?"

"Cricket, Paula cares about me, but it's always been one way and she knows it, there is a lady in New York, I want you to meet someday, my ex-wife and publisher of the Rick Castle brand"

"Do you still love Gina Rick? I mean she was your wife for almost three years, and it would be natural to have feelings for her."

"God, and I thought I did a ton of research, how much more do you know about me, Cricket? To answer your question, Gina is staying with my Daughter, and yes she has told me she loves me, even through the Detective saga, so to be honest, yes I love her, I'm just not in love with her, and there's the problem."

"So you're in love with Kate, who doesn't know you exist half the time, Gina is still madly in love with you, Paula would screw you in the Palace Garden given the chance she's so smitten, and then there's me, who thinks you are one of the most wonderful men I have ever met.

I would take even a one-night stand if it were all that was offered, No wonder you are terrified. I understand Rick, I really do, it's just I want you to know that being with you isn't like work, it's like we're on a date without the sex, until you are ready to add that, again, when you're ready."

Cricket had managed to do what so many other woman could never do, leave Rick totally speechless, and blushing like a teenager.

Dr. Carter Burke's Office

New York, the Following Monday

8:00 AM Local Time

Kate had been up since 3:30 AM pacing back and forth, even after an extended run she didn't feel any less stressed. She had continued to run in the direction of Rick's Loft, hoping by chance that she might get a sneak peak at him, slipping in and out, she refused to accept that he had left Alexis and his Mother to go God knows where. She had pushed her daily 3 mile run to extend to 5 miles and still felt like a cat on a hot tin roof.

Finally, she showered and dressed, reviewing her homework assignment from Dr. Burke, hoping that this type of activity would not be ongoing, she was very private, and by putting down on paper her deepest thoughts, she was forced to at least admit she had the feelings, even if she did repress them and fail to work to correct. She found herself outside the locked office door of the doctor at 7:15 AM.

Finally, after what seemed a life time, a middle-aged woman made her way towards the doctors office with keys in her hand,

"Good Morning, the Doctor isn't expected for another half hour, so you must be early for your appointment. Let me get opened up, and then I'll show you to his waiting area where you can have a cup of coffee or tea, I'll be right back."

A few minutes later the door behind Kate opened to reveal the same woman,

"Good Morning, you must be Katherine Beckett, I'm Dorothy Wills, Doctor Burke's Office Manager for the last 15 years. Come in and make yourself comfortable while we wait for Doctor, please."

"Good Morning Dorothy, it's a pleasure to meet you, I am Katherine Beckett, I think we have spoken on the phone a few times."

"Yes Dear, that was me, I made your appointments and set up all the required paperwork for Doctor to complete for the NYPD. Take a seat, it shouldn't be long now."

About 15 minutes later a very tall and well built African American Male with graying temples appeared through the back door that Kate had entered, and said immediately

"Good Morning, you must be Katherine, give me a few moments to get setup and grab my coffee and we can start our session."

Less than five minutes later, the door opened,

"Good Morning again Katherine, shall I call you that or is there a name you prefer, I'm Doctor Carter Burke", as he extended his large hand.

"Good Morning Doctor, I go by Kate, the only one who calls me Katherine is my Dad when he's angry and Castle's mother."

"Very Well, Good Morning Kate, can you tell me in a few words why YOU think you are here, I have the official mandate from NYPD, but I'd like to know in your words why, or if you feel like you even belong here"

BAM, right off the bat, a curve ball was thrown, just like Maddie told her, be careful of the questions that seem innocent, but have a zinger attached at the end.

"Well, I failed to control the people who reported to me, I even failed at providing a safe work environment for one individual who has left the department, and left me no ties to apologize or to ask forgiveness,"

"Is the individual you mention who left, a Mr. Castle, an unpaid Consultant working with you?"

"Yes, it's Rick Castle, but he was so much more than just an unpaid consultant, he's a best-selling author, who thought outside the box, not typical thinking for cops that helped solve a number of cases."

"Your tone inflects you felt something for Mr. Castle, Kate, may I ask if this developed into anything more than a work relationship, if you're willing to share?"

Kate spends the next twenty minutes bringing the Doctor up to speed with her version of how the arrangement came to be, the incidents she was guilty of, and to her credit she was honest in her appraisals of her actions. Doctor Burke would ask a clarifying question from time to time, but largely took notes, a lot of notes. Finally, as her voice cracked, and she fought the tears back, she expressed her regrets, not only because of the hurt caused, but also because she did feel love, a lot of love for him and missed him terribly.

"Kate one observation, I have heard you speak of Mr. Castle and how much regret you have, but didn't your team get disassembled and one other detective get an extensive suspension and punishment, what are your feelings about that?"

"Doctor Burke, if I understood the homework correctly, I was to note those feelings down, and what I would do if I had a chance to repeat the incident. The second part was knowing there are no do overs in life, how do I plan on making it right with each one now"

Doctor Burks's eyes sparkled, "It sounds like you took this assignment to heart Kate, a very good sign, may I see your homework please?"

Kate reluctantly handed the ledger to him, and waited as he reviewed the entries, stopping again to make notes on his pad from time to time.

"Very Good Kate, I think you were honest with your thoughts, we can work on some techniques for redemption in future sessions, the first rule being you must own what you did, and from these entries, you are accepting responsibility. Just one question, do you feel that Mr. Castle left to be wherever he is because of you and you alone or were there other factors. Also, the song you noted is indeed a beautiful song, it's actually from my youth so I know it well, the question, is that how you feel now?

Kate bowed her head, tears falling gently, "Yes, I didn't realize just how much I counted on, leaned on, depended upon and how my heart felt knowing now he's gone, so yes, it hurts more today than yesterday that I may never see him again, or get the opportunity to tell him how I feel"

"Well I see our time is up, I would like for you to continue the journal entries, and be as brave as you were this week, it speeds your recovery Kate, the more open you are the sooner we can deal with root issues for behavior, I'll see you Thursday"

Kate left the office, completely drained, but feeling some better, she had at least gotten the words out, she loved Castle, now the hard part, how to let him know.