Chapter Fourteen: Accidentally in Love

(second of two chapters uploaded today)

For a moment, it was as if time had stopped. Ethan pulled her close and Theresa lost the will to care about anything else except that he was there, and he was kissing her, and she was kissing him back. Her arms slid around his neck and she stood on tiptoe to be even nearer to him, completely lost in the moment.

All too soon it was over. Eventually they came up for air, and suddenly the realization of what she'd just done hit Theresa. "Oh my God." She pulled away quickly. "Ethan, I...we shouldn't have...what was I thinking?"

"Theresa, I think this was meant to happen. Don't tell me you don't feel it. We're meant to be together, just like you told me all those years." Ethan's eyes were beseeching.

"It's too late for that, Ethan!" Theresa stared at him in amazement. "I dreamed of you saying that so many times, and it never happened. What did I get instead? 'I'm married, Theresa. I need to honor my vows. I can't be with you. I don't want you. ' For years that's all I got from you, and now that I'm going to marry a man who never rejected me or chose someone over me, you've changed your mind. That's a little too convenient, don't you think? I think this is just a case of you wanting what you can't have. If I gave into you, how long would it last before you found something else that you needed to put ahead of our relationship...again?" She shook her head and tried to push past him.

"If you really believe that, Theresa, then why do you still love me?" Ethan caught her by the arm and held her back. "Why can't you look me in the eye when you say Jared's the one you want to spend your life with? Because you know, deep down, that it's not what you dream of at night. I don't know how I can prove to you that I've changed, that I will never walk away from you again, but I do know that I'm not going to give up trying."

Theresa couldn't listen to anymore. She yanked herself away from him and ran up the garden path and to the door, disappearing inside. Ethan watched her go, torn for a moment, then he turned and walked back the other way, taking the long way around to his suite. His steps though, were light and his heart, even lighter. Fate had spoken, and her word was gold-he and Theresa would be together, one way or another.

Theresa ran up the stairs to the bedroom she shared with Jared, wondering how in the world she was going to explain to him why she'd been outside in her nightgown for the past two hours. It wouldn't take him more than a second to figure out that she'd been wtih Ethan. She wiped a hand across her mouth as if she could get rid of the evidence of her guilt but it was just an empty gesture. The guilt was in her heart-and probably written all over her face. She opened the door to her bedroom, prepared to face the showdown that was inevitable, then stopped in confusion at the empty, still made bed in front of her.

"Jared?" Theresa looked around but there was no sign of him. His shoes weren't by the door, his tie wasn't thrown on the bed-there was no sign that he'd been home at all. She looked at the clock, wondering if she'd been mistaken about the time but no...12:09am in red numbers flickered back at her. "Jared...where are you?"

--

Jared looked at his watch and swore under his breath as he paced the sidewalk, glaring at the graffiti covered phone booth in front of him. "Call already...I don't know how I'm going to explain this to Theresa." He muttered out loud. As if his words were a signal, the phone began to sound shrilly and Jared jumped forward, grabbing it off the hook.

"521." He hissed into the receiver then listened for a minute to the voice on the other end.

"It's about time." He spoke again. "Did you get the information?" He waited again, tapping his foot impatiently. He scratched his head as the voice spoke.
"That's not good enough! I need written confirmation-I'm ready to move. I've already spent over a year of my life neck deep in this crap and we need to end this. Go back, talk to them, tell them I need the intel, and then I need the go ahead to put this all in motion. Got that?" His voice was rough. The voice on the other end paused, then murmured a few placating phrases. Giving into his temper, Jared cut it off mid sentence, hanging up the phone.

"I don't know if I can do this anymore. How can I walk down the aisle with Theresa knowing that I haven't been honest with her? We'd be living a lie. This has to come out before the wedding...but if I tell her now, the consequences could be disastrous. Dammit!" He wanted to throw something but nothing was available. Taking a deep breath, he turned and walked away, hoping he could come up with a good enough cover story to tell Theresa when he got home.

The Following Afternoon
The Book Cafe

Whitney looked up with a smile as Theresa joined her at the small table.

"It's about time. I was almost ready to give up on you." She indicated her watch with a teasing look.

"Sorry, Whit - EJ's baseball practice ran late. Anyway, Ethan's taking him to have dinner with Ivy and Sam and Jane is with Gwen for the night so I'm all yours."

"What about Jared?" Whitney asked. "Don't you want to spend some time with him, maybe going over plans for the wedding?"

Theresa frowned. "He's working late...again. I mean, I think it's great that he's so devoted to helping Sheridan take over at Crane but this is starting to get ridiculous. Last night he lost track of time and didn't come home until nearly one in the morning."

"Really?" Whitney raised her eyebrows. "That doesn't sound like Jared-I never would have guessed that he's such a workaholic."

"He's not." Theresa stared at her hands. "Whitney, I'm starting to wonder...never mind."

"Oh no." Whitney looked at her friend with concern. "Theresa, you think Jared's cheating on you?"

"No...I don't know. What am I supposed to think? There hasn't been any other signs and there's a thousand other things it could be. All I know is something isn't right. Maybe he's more upset than I thought about Ethan living with us. Maybe I'm just projecting my own guilt onto him." Theresa buried her head in her hands. "Everything is so messed up."

"Your own guilt?" Whitney's eyebrows shot up. "Oh Theresa...tell me you didn't. You and Ethan?"

"I didn't. Well, it's not what you think. I kissed him. No, that's not entirely accurate. He kissed me. I just didn't kick him like I should have." Theresa stared down at her fingernails, waiting for the inevitable lecture.

"Theresa, honey, what are you doing?" Whitney's voice was exasperated. "You're as bad as Kay Bennett!" Theresa's eyes flashed warningly and Whitney backed down. "OK, you're not. You're confused but for your sake and Jared's sake, you'd better get your head straight, fast. Time is flying girl, and your wedding is getting closer and closer. A few months may seem like a long time but believe me, the big day will be here before you know it, and you can't walk down that aisle and make your vows in front of God when your heart belongs to another man. It's not right."

"Ethan doesn't have my heart." Whitney stared at Theresa disbelievingly and she was forced to look away. "Well, not all of it." She mumbled almost to herself.

Whitney shook her head. "I can't believe you. Here I thought you'd finally moved on, set your feet on the ground and stopped living in dreams and yet here you go, thinking you can love one man and marry another, not to mention the fact that you're all living together. I mean, how exactly did you think that was going to work out? A blind man could have seen this one coming."

Theresa's head shot up and her eyes fixed on Whitney angrily. "Why do you always do that, Whitney? You can be so unsupportive sometimes-it's not like I'm not trying, OK? I've held it together the best I could in the past year, moving on with Jared, raising my children, having to co-parent with Gwen, of all people, with Ethan no where in sight, and trying to run Crane and deal with Julian and just...all of it! When did I become responsible for everyone and everything? Have you forgotten who I am? I am Theresa Lopez Fitzgerald, the dreamer, the girl with her head in the clouds, the one who can make herself believe in anything. What happened to me? Why am I expected to be so rational all of the sudden and so level headed? Gwen has more flights of fancy then I do lately! Look, if I want to stare in the sky and believe that everything will magically work itself out, that's what I'm going to do and you can just suck it up and be there for me, like a best friend should be, the way I'd be there for you." Folding her arms stubbornly in front of her, she whirled around in her chair and faced the wall, grim faced.

"Theresa, come on, don't be like that." Whitney sighed and reached out to her friend.

Theresa remained bullheaded, continuing to face the way. "I'm sorry, Whitney, but Theresa's in LaLa Land right now and not taking any calls."

"OK, OK, you're right." Whitney threw her hands up in surrender. "I have been down on you a lot when it comes to Ethan. I'm sorry...I didn't realize how negative I sounded. It's just...old habits die hard, I guess, and you've gotten so hurt in the past when it comes to him. I just don't want to see that happen to you again. Jared loves you and he'd never betray you. I want you to be happy, and it's my completely non judgemental, best friend opinion, that you'd be happiest with him. But I really do understand that it's not easy to get someone out of your heart, even if they're no good for you." She sighed, thinking of her own life, then looked back at Theresa. "Forgive me and I'll buy you a hot fudge sundae...please?"

Theresa turned around to face her, smiling slightly. "Deal." They reached across the table and hugged.

"I'm glad that's settled." Theresa smiled. "I hate fighting with you. We've been friends too long. Anyway, let's stop talking about me. I want to know how you're dealing with everything-have you heard from Chad?"

Whitney groaned. "Yes...he just doesn't give up. But you know, I really don't want to talk about him either. I just want to order two totally fattening sundaes dripping with chocolate and go on a sugar induced ride to Happyland with you. Let's just talk about...I don't know, anything. Anything but our tragically dire love lives."

Theresa laughed. "I'm with you. Let's see...who can we gossip shamelessly about? Oh wait-I know a completely juicy piece of information that I forgot to share with you! OK, you won't believe this one. On Gwen's wedding day, Jessica Bennett showed up at my house and get this-asked me to help her stop the wedding."

Whitney's mouth fell open. "You're kidding! Why?"

Theresa leaned forward and lowered her voice. "Kieran. She wants him, bad, and I guess she's decided that he wants her too and if Gwen would just get out of their way, well..."

Whitney was too shocked to speak for a moment. Finding her voice, she finally managed to talk again. "No way. You don't think she and Kieran have something going on the side, do you?" She breathed a sigh of relief as Theresa shook her head firmly. "Good...Gwen's finally so happy, and that just would have been too horrible. But where did Jessica come up with this anyway? And why am I feeling this sudden sense of deja vu?"

Theresa laughed, a little reluctantly. "Whitney, I can only hope that I didn't come off as two steps away from needing a straitjacket like she did. She was entirely upset that I wouldn't help you-you should have heard the things she said to me." She shrugged. "Oh well-it's over now. Gwen and Kieran are married and there's not a thing that Jessica can do about it." Their sundaes had finally arrived, and Theresa leaned forward, pulling the cherry off the top and popping it into her mouth.

"Um...I'm not so sure." Whitney scratched her head. "I ran into Kay earlier today and she told me that Jessica got a job working at the Blue Note, or whatever Kieran and Noah are going to call it when they re-open next week. That makes a lot more sense after what you told me."

"You're right!" Theresa felt a slight sinking sensation as she realized it. "She took that job to get close to Kieran-it can't be a coincidence." She stirred her sundae around absently. "Hmmm...this could get sticky."

"Theresa, you've got to tell Gwen." Whitney looked at her friend, her voice firm.

"Are you crazy, Whitney? Not only is that a very awkward conversation that I really don't want to have, but it would also make me partly responsible for Jessica's subsequent bloody murder. I mean, honestly, how do you think Gwen would take it?"

"That's true." Whitney admitted. "But you can't just stand by and watch. This could get ugly."

Theresa thought for a moment and then shook her head. "Whitney, I don't think Jessica's going to get anywhere with this. Look who she's up against. Gwen's a master at dealing with this kind of stuff, and Jessica's barely out of the junior leagues. If she has any sense of self preservation, she'll quit while she still has all her vital parts. But if it makes you feel better, I'll talk to Kieran. He probably has no idea how she feels, but once he knows, he'll be on his guard, and he can shut her down." She smiled and took another bite out of her sundae. "This is going to be the non-drama of the year, I'm telling you."

But perhaps she wouldn't have been so sure if she could have seen what was happening at the Blue Note that very moment...

To Be Continued...

In the next chapter, an unstable Jessica plays a dangerous game.