A/N: Chap features a song composed and written by a fellow bandmate more than 10 years ago.
Song Name: Fallin'
Songwriter: Harini Sudarshan
Sapphyra
Madhu: Yeah! :D
Unedited...
Chapter 13: Under The Twilight Sun
The hum of the tyres sang through the night speeding back towards Lupin Lodge, even as an ominous hush brewed between Sirius and James. Because, even if they had laughed it off in the faces of the two policemen, both of them knew that this was not normal in any sense of the word; wizards didn't just crop out of nowhere and attacked a couple of fifteen-year-old's in the dead of the night for no reason... At least, Sirius didn't think the situation was this bad already.
Unless...
He slammed on the breaks, making the vehicle screech to a halt in an empty alleyway, fully overcome with worry now. And, the fact James was still being unusually quiet was enough to let Sirius know that he knew something was up that he wasn't aware of.
Neither spoke for a long time, each lost in thoughts of their own.
James sighed at last.
"You know, if you don't want to talk about it..."
"What, no!" Sirius responded almost on an impulse. "It's nothing like that..."
"No, I'm just saying..." James insisted from over Sirius's shoulder, his face etched with concern. "It's alright if you need more time to open up about whatever this was about. But, just promise me that you won't get yourself into serious trouble..."
"Prongs..." Sirius sighed.
"NO, Pads, you listen to me very carefully, right now," he said, finally swinging himself off the rear seat and rounding up on Sirius. Towering above him and determinedly ignoring the guilt that dripped off of Sirius's face, he said, "If you let anything happen to you..."
"I think you're overreacting just a little bit..."
"Shut up!" growled James, and grabbed hold of Sirius's collar, his face screaming bloody murder. "I've lost hold of Lily already, Pads and I am not too keen on losing my best friend too! And from what we saw today, those blokes looked ready to blast your head off, and don't get me wrong, I'd gladly knock every last one of them out cold for you, but that's only if I'm there when they attack you again. You got lucky today and you know it..." he said, finally letting go off Sirius's leather jacket.
Sirius, who had avoided James's eyes for the longest time, slumped even more in his seat, staring absent-mindedly at the road while his mind raced with thoughts. Admittedly, James was right, today had been a close call; Sirius could've been outnumbered three-to-one. And to top it all, his attackers weren't exactly underage, lackadaisical teenagers like himself; they were grown wizards with the license to use ANY kind of magic...
Finally looking at James straight in the eye he said, "I think we got attacked today because word about a possible 'curse' that I may be carrying must've got out, all thanks to Regulus..."
A gaping silence followed that statement. "Word of your what?" asked James, scrunching his eyebrows in confusion. "And what's this about Regulus?"
"Long story," Sirius sighed, gesturing at James to get back on the bike. "Need a full-house for this one," he added, grinning sheepishly. "I just hope Remus doesn't get into one of his darned lecture sessions after listening to this story!"
"I can't believe you're laughing something like this off..."
"And THIS was exactly why I didn't want to tell you or the lads about it just yet. Right bunch of pansies, aren't you!" Sirius replied, grinning even more.
James rolled his eyes. "Izzy is right, you are a work of art!" he chided even as he flung himself back on the backseat.
"As if! We'll let Peter decide who of the two of us is a bigger headache!" Sirius laughed, revving up the beast once more.
"Right! If Peter's the one deciding, we already know who the winner is!" James scoffed, lightening up finally. "It's no secret he worships me most of all!"
Sirius rolled his eyes and zoomed past blurry houses with a smirk on his face. "Now you know why I love Remus more!"
- oo -
A few days after New Year, Isabella was back at King's Cross station, reveling in the sound of the Hogwarts Express, hissing and billowing its black smoke, ready to haul students back to reality. Only Mrs. Williams was there to say goodbye as Mr. Williams was at work and Angela was back in her own school.
"Alright then, no more fighting, you hear me, darling?" asked Mrs. Williams, only to invite more rolling-of-the-eyes from Isabella, even as she stepped into the train and slammed the door shut behind her. "And make sure you write to me every week at least!" she said through the window, her voice trembling a little with emotion, just as the train jerked forwards. Admittedly, Mrs. Williams had been dissolving into tears more than usual at the mere thought of how quiet the house was going to get again with Isabella gone.
"I will, Mother," Isabella replied, gulping down the growing lump in her own throat. "And even if I forget, you know that Lucius would knock me on the head and steer me back to the Owlery, don't you?" she called out, smiling fondly at the wet, red face of her mother. The train was slowly starting to pull out of the station, gaining speed with every passing second.
"Bye, darling!" were the last words she heard as the train trudged out of the station and into the glorious morning. Ignoring the prickling in her eyes, she turned around to see where the others had got to and started to wade through a sea of excited students chatting away in the corridor. She hadn't dragged her trunk for more than a minute, when someone tapped her on the shoulder.
"Can I begin by saying just how much I missed you?" spoke a familiar voice from behind, making her heart leap into her mouth in horror!
"Ryan!" she said almost breathlessly and turned around to find his handsome face smiling down at her; she'd been away from school and in the presence of Sirius and the girls for so long that she almost forgot she was actually seeing someone at school! "Why, there you are! I... You... Er..."
"You're speechless. I get it. Don't worry, I tend to have that kind of effect on people," he guffawed in mock-pride, making her laugh faintly. She rubbed her face desperately to shake off the odd trance that had suddenly descended upon her and tried to put on a more genuine smile this time.
"What's the matter, why do you seem so rattled?" he laughed, no doubt under the impression that his good looks had knocked the wind out of her.
"Oh! I..." she spluttered, "It's nothing, I... You just gave me such a fright is all!"
Ryan chuckled into his hand. "Merlin, I missed you..." he muttered, and before she could even realise what was happening, he had thrown his hands around her, pulling her into a tight hug!
Alarmed beyond belief and hyperventilating for Merlin knows why, she desperately tried to reason with herself.
This is Ryan. You like Ryan! He's nice. Really nice! He asked you out and you said YES, remember? This is as good as it can GET, Izzy! Pull your socks up and get it together now! she thought to herself and reluctantly returned the hug, but the tight knot that was forming in her stomach was what scared her the most. Was this even normal? she thought again, as anxiety pulsed through her.
Only when he finally let her go did she realise she had held her breath for so long. This is such a nightmare.
"Alright, have you lot found seats yet?" he asked, graciously taking her trunk in his hand.
"Um, I... I'm not sure, actually!" she squeaked, fanning the sweat off her brow. "Haven't seen any of them as yet, to be honest."
"Ah, well, not to worry, most of you fifth-years are in our compartment, anyway. Besides, I'd rather you sit with me for a while before I lose you to the girls all over again," he laughed, wrapping a protective arm around her shoulder and leading his girlfriend through hordes of students; sadly, this only made her want to run as far away from him as possible!
Wiping her face for the hundredth time despite the biting cold that prevailed around her, she followed Ryan until they neared a particularly loud compartment. A wave of relief washed over her when she heard James's loud snickering and the sound of several hands high-fiving each other.
"Hello, hello!" Ryan called out and pushed into the already overflowing compartment of mostly only boys, with Isabella's trunk held high above his head to avoid knocking people's knees with it.
"Ah! Evantrap with his bird again! Finally!" called out Daniel Willets from near the window, making the whole compartment crack up once more. "I'll tell you lads, we've got a real crackpot among us—"
"—Dan, shut up for the love of—!"
"Nice! Ryan-bashing all over again! I like it!" Thomas called out happily, while the rest of the seventh-years sniggered in his wake.
"—Ryan, here," Daniel began and waited for the noise to settle down once again so that he may be heard more clearly, "is such an ardent lover, it's almost unreal!"
"Pray, tell, Danny boy!" Sirius cheekily called out from next to him, making the other boys roar with enthusiasm once again.
"Ah, bloody hell, here we go again!" Ryan said resigedly, cursing under his breath and pulling Isabella on to his lap, making several eyebrows shoot up in appreciation (Isabella, on the other hand, was hyperventilating to such an extent, she was positive she was having a brain hemorrhage).
"So, Ryan here, would've written to me at least seven times over the holidays. Now, given that he's my best mate and all—"
"You're the worst best friend on the planet, Dan," said Clarissa with pure disgust.
"—I'd still appreciate it had it been letters that concerned me, but nooo!" Daniel continued as if he hadn't heard Clarissa at all. "He wrote to me seven times merely to wonder why he hadn't got a Christmas present from his lady love as yet!" he exclaimed, making the whole compartment explode into laughter mixed with fake shock over this new piece of information. Several boys feigned deep hurt and howled like a bunch of maniacs. Isabella was as good as dead at this point.
"Wha—You didn't get Ryan a present?" Oliver Wharton exclaimed, sounding just as ridiculous as the rest of them were. "That can't be right!"
"Well, I... It's... I don't..." she stuttered, not finding even a remotely good-enough answer to justify her actions.
"You bet it's not right!" Sirius chimed in, his face flushed red in excitement. "Because, believe it or not, she got me a muggle motorbike! D'you know how expensive that is?" he exclaimed and a collective gasp went up and Ryan's eyes flew open. Isabella was almost asthmatic now, because, even in her current state of mind, she knew that that gasp was actual shock rather than mindless teasing. The compartment was slowly sinking into awkwardness, with Ryan watching Isabella over her shoulder with a pained expression on his face while the Marauders continued on being completely oblivious to the mood in the room.
"Oh, and didn't she write to you at least ten times in three days?!" Peter added, making it worse than ever.
Isabella could feel all the colour in her face drain away as more received a few more accusatory looks from the audience. "Well, that's... A gross exaggeration, Pete," Remus offered weakly.
The compartment had gone fully quiet now, gurgling with awkwardness.
"Isabella?" said Ryan, his eyes flashing with utter disbelief.
Her heart fell. This was probably the worst she'd ever felt in her entire life.
"Well, I..." she began, and caught Remus's eyes. The calming smile he held in his face, made her relax instantly. Thinking on her feet she said, "Ryan, I do have something for you, except," she paused even as Remus nodded encouragingly. "Except it can't be er... 'Given' per say," she said, improvising on the go.
"How d'you mean?" Ryan asked, his eyes widening instantly in expectation (from the side she saw Sirius's eyebrows shoot up in wild curiosity too).
"Er... Well, I... I hope this doesn't embarrass you... I mean, it may have been presumptuous of me to have even... Wh-It's a song! Basically. That I wrote myself... That I want to sing it to you..." she said, kicking herself for lying to his face this way. "I couldn't possibly owl that, could I?" she said, smiling weakly while several low whistles went up in the air.
"Show me," said Ryan, wildly taken aback, while wrenching a muggle guitar out of an unsuspecting Robert's hand and handing it to her.
"Yeah, show us," said Sirius, crossing his hands across his chest, still eyeing her curiously. "Haven't heard you sing in the longest time."
"Bet you missed it leaps," James cheekily added in a low voice so that only Isabella and Sirius could hear it.
"Shut it, Prongs."
Trembling a little with nervousness, she delicately placed the guitar on her lap. "You sure about this? Are we actually doing this in front these trolls?" she asked, grinning nervously.
"Never been surer of anything else till this second," he said, with as much sincerity as he could muster. "And anyone who finds it too corny for their liking is welcome to leave," he said, triggering a volley of wolf whistles.
"Evantrap, you beast!" howled Puck while Julius Freckle, another sixth-year student decided to throw in a, "Potter's right, you really are whipped!" But none of this mattered to Ryan, who was patiently waiting for Isabella to give him his 'present' while the compartment steadily got rowdy as the anticipation built up.
Avoiding the piercing looks she was receiving from Sirius who sat across from her, Isabella closed her eyes to calm her nerves before strumming the instrument once. The compartment fell quiet instantly, mostly because the boys knew they were about to get unbearably embarrassed by whatever was to follow, but she didn't care; she owed it to Ryan.
Strumming the chords on the strings, she started humming the tune of the song she had written three years ago as a lonesome thirteen-year-old girl. Of all the songs she'd ever written, this one was her most favorite. A flood of emotions ran through her as memories of long ago breezed through her mind.
"When I look at your face,
Under the twilight sun,
When I hear your voice,
Before the day has begun...
When I–I find you suddenly smiling at me...
My heart just skips a beat.
When you hold my face,
In your warm hands,
When your skin glitters,
In the sun-kissed sands,
When like a child you smile down at me...
I go weak in the knees...
'Cause you got me -
Fallin' like I've never been in love before...
Fallin' for the last few years or so...
Fallin' you've got to know that it is true...
Fallin' ever since I... Set my eyes... On you..."
She hummed the tune all over again, pacing her strumming perfectly, completely transported back in time, almost like she was floating away in nothingness. With a final stroke, she concluded the song and was pleasantly surprised to see several nods of appreciation and a light applause as well coming from the older boys.
"Wow," said Martin, looking amused, "that was... quite nice!"
"'Quite nice'?" Clarissa challenged immediately, "that was beautiful!" she exclaimed almost close to tears, and several murmurs of agreement erupted all around her.
"The Star Chaser who plays hard ball by day and a devoted girlfriend at night! Not bad, Williams!" chuckled Thomas, smacking her back boyishly.
Ryan, though, seemed to have drowned entirely into oblivion, heart-eyeing Isabella from the side. She felt her stomach squirm uneasily, only it had nothing to do with Ryan at all: Sirius's eyes had been clawed on to her for the longest time and if anything, she thought he looked more feral now than ever...
"Yeah, I'm definitely in love too," Ryan muttered and crashed his lips to the side of her face just got as a volley of protests exploded around them. Several boys actually jumped to their feet and made a dash to the door and Isabella looked on, chuckling nervously. But, no matter what she did or how hard she tried, she could not deny the unwavering, silent gaze of Sirius and when their eyes finally met, her insides melted all over again. She knew what he was thinking, she heard him loud and clear, could read the questions he was throwing at her as if he was holding a microphone to his mouth; questions she didn't have the answers to at all...
- oOo -
"You know, Izzy, I must admit. I LOVE YOUR LIFE!" Claiborne exclaimed as they stepped out of the compartment and into the chilly night.
"I know. The three of us put together don't have as much drama going on as you do!" Mary chimed in, wrapping her neck with a third woolen scarf and starting to look like a mummy now.
"Yeah, yet, ironically, I'd do anything to trade lives with one of you," Isabella said dryly, bracing herself from the bone-chilling cold and waiting in line to board the carriages that were waiting outside the station. She had spent the more half the train ride back to Hogwarts narrating the day's incident and was now genuinely tired of her own voice.
"So, just to clarify..."
"Lily. If you ask me whether Sirius looked 'merely curious' or 'downright annoyed' one more time, I will personally feed you to the fabled one-eyed witch behind the castle!"
"I'm only checking!" Lily replied, petulantly pouting at Isabella. "Aw, but I feel horrible for you..." she said, eyeing her like Isabella was a lost puppy in the woods. "Now Ryan thinks you're in love with him—"
"—I may be for all you know!"
"But you aren't! And that was exactly what I warned you about before you said yes to him!" Claiborne concluded triumphantly and floated into an empty carriage like a princess.
"Yes, thanks a lot, Clay! That helps a lot..." Isabella replied gloomily. "After you, Alice," she added stiffly. She had been over-the-top courteous with Alice for the most part of the train ride primarily in the hopes that Alice would finally take pity on her and decide to become her friend again. Pathetic, I know!
"Why, thank you, Izzy," Alice said and smiled, making Isabella whip her head around in surprise. She was actually being civil with her! Finally! "Oh, and... I need to tell you something," she continued while taking her seat next to Claiborne. "I felt horrible for not coming home for Christmas, and I want to make it up to you. So, as a peace offering, I wish to make you my very first confidante! What do you think?" she asked, smiling fondly at a dumbstruck Isabella while the rest of them gaped at her in shock and fury.
"No way! I want in too!" Lily protested. "Girls?" she exclaimed, inviting them to join the riot too; sadly, the others didn't seem to share her enthusiasm.
"Er... Honestly, I couldn't care less. Pretty sure I already know what this is about anyway, so the rest of you can battle it out," Mary laughed and got into the carriage herself.
"And I'm just happy you two are talking again, so I don't care either!" Claiborne said almost teary-eyed. "Ah! The balance has finally been restored again!" she exclaimed dramatically, further weakening Lily's case.
She jerked her head towards Isabella. "Have I told you I hate you?" Lily said, narrowing her eyes to mere slits.
Isabella laughed. "Only too many times!"
...
Isabella was about ready to eat her own feet by the time they pulled into the driveway of their school.
"Oh, I hope the elves have been kind on us today!" she exclaimed and jumped out of the horseless carriage.
Mary groaned right behind her. "Would you lot judge me too much if I crawled my way into the Great Hall?" she asked, making the girls roar with laughter at her smug expression. Nodding sarcastically at her dense friends, she said, "Thank you, I got my answer."
"Forget food, I can't wait to go to the library!" Lily said, and dashed into the Entrance Hall after Alice.
From the corner of her eye, Isabella noticed the Marauders' carriage pull up behind them and a sudden dread descended upon her. She needed to be as far away from the morons as possible, she just had to. Feeling a bit woozy with the sudden anxiety, she mindlessly hurtled into the castle. And if she timed it right, she could be done with dinner and up in the dorms without ever running into them!
Dodging incoming traffic of students, she trudged her way into the Great Hall and flopped down next to Alice at the Gryffindor table. Ignoring the rumbling in her stomach, she waited most impatiently for the teachers to trickle in, for Dumbledore to give his darned speech and for the food to appear on her plate already!
Shaking her leg to calm her nerves, she hardly dared to look up as Lily and Mary and Claiborne and the rest of her House slowly trickled in and took their seats around her.
"What's the matt—?"
"Nothing!" she snapped at Claiborne and hid her face in her hands. Merlin, help me! she thought to herself desperately and pulled her head back just in time to notice a tall figure appearing behind her. She froze in place, dissolving entirely in fear.
"Oh, hell," she said to herself as Claiborne and Alice looked enquiringly between Sirius and Isabella.
Sirius didn't say anything and continued to simply stand there with his hands on his waist, her as if that was enough to convey his intentions. Isabella on the other hand was literally shaking in fear.
"Sirius..."
"No," he said flatly.
Isabella smacked her own head in frustration. "Sirius, please. I'm famished and tired..."
"And I don't care."
"Why are you being so difficult—?" she asked frustratedly and turned around to find him staring down at her completely expressionless but managing to convey more emotions than ever.
"You and I both know why."
"I don't want to talk!" she declared stubbornly and turned her back on him only to be hoisted back to her feet most effortlessly by the arm. "Bavarian Erkling!" she swore, but he didn't seem to care and dragged her up the hall, his hand firmly gripping her forearm, much to everyone's bewilderment. They marched past several students who were shuffling into their seats at their table and Isabella was most glad the sixth-years hadn't arrived yet. One ruddy problem at a time, please!
"Sirius, I think you're being supremely ridiculous!" she stated as they crossed the teachers' table (the entire hall had turned their attention on the pair now as he relentlessly kept walking. "And we're drawing attention to ourselves!" she hissed crossly in his ear to no avail; he dragged her on with more zeal than ever.
As they neared the Slytherin table, her eyes fell on Lucius who was eyeing them too with gut-wrenching concern for her. She merely shook her head to tell him it was nothing just as they exited the hall.
Leading her into the Entrance Hall and out through the double doors, they stepped into the chilly night once more. Several stray students who had arrived in the last few carriages were hurrying into the castle now as they halted on the steps, basking in the cool light emanating from within.
"Alright, what do you want?" she muttered, watching a bunch of third-year Ravenclaw girls hover behind Sirius, trying to get a better look at his handsome face.
"You tell me. What was that about?" he asked, hardly caring for the girls behind him.
Isabella huffed angrily. "It was JUST a song! A stupid, girly song—!" she said through gritted teeth.
"Shut up. What the hell are you doing with Ryan?" he whispered as if he hadn't heard her at all, staring incredulously down at her.
Isabella paused, mad with anger now. "What the bloody hell's that supposed to mean?"
"You know quite well what that means!" he said, hissing angrily back at her. The giggling girls were reluctantly heading back inside now, much to Isabella's relief.
"Listen. I cannot be responsible for your mindless assumptions! And for the last time, it didn't mean anyth—!" She didn't finish her sentence because she knew Sirius wasn't listening to her at all. He simply stood there speechlessly, consumed with disbelief; with questions that she wasn't ready to face...
"Is it true?" he finally spoke. "D'you really feel ALL that for me...? Izzy?" he mumbled, making her heart stop beating entirely. He was staring down blankly at her, almost not breathing at all and Isabella had gone ridiculously red in the face. "It's not just a fleeting thing that I thought it was...?"
A shiver ran up her spine. "I don't know what you're talking about..." she breathed more to herself and hurriedly turned around to dash back inside.
"Don't do this to yourself, Izzy," he spoke behind her, making her stop dead in her tracks. She closed her eyes to calm her nerves, but it wasn't working... Nothing was working in her favour. "Don't lie to yourself. You owe it to yourself..."
"Good Godric! It wasn't about you, Sirius! Everything isn't about YOU!" she yelled, still having her back to him.
"Why didn't you tell me before...?" he insisted, refusing to acknowledge her protests. "How could you keep something like this from me for so long?" he muttered just as she turned back around, exasperation threatening to blow her head off. "I had a right to know, you know."
She finally gave up. She finally gave in. She couldn't keep up this charade any longer; They both knew what was really going on, and she knew no amount of lying or hiding the truth from him was going to make him believe otherwise. Sirius was right. About everything. And there was no point denying it.
She narrowed her eyes at him, finally feeling brave enough to face him.
"Like hell you did," she said, finally getting on the same page with him.
Nobody said anything for a long time.
"What are you doing with Ryan?" he finally asked again, seeming exasperated.
Isabella was shaking from head to toe when she spoke again. "What do you think?"