Aaand, I'm back! I didn't change this much, but here we go!
The wing beats grew louder. Samus looked up to see the last thing she wanted to encounter at the moment, but what she had known would be there. "Ridley!"
And he was diving down... down... straight towards Ike.
"Ike!" cried Samus, instincts taking over again. She raced toward him, charging her cannon. She fired at Ridley, shoving Ike out of the way of his huge claws.
Ridley, hurt by the cannon shot, turned his attention to Samus. "Aha!" he hissed. "So you're here. I've got you now." His claws sank into her suit, picking her up into the air. He flapped around in a circle for a bit.
Samus felt electricity shoot from her suit. It burned through her body, every bone aching like it was on fire. Then everything went black.
Ike looked up at Samus. "Dammit!" He muttered. He tossed Ragnell and started the same attack he had used to take down the bird-thing.
But Ridley shot out a claw and caught him too. "Two for one! And I would have settled with simply killing Samus." Ike hung in the air, a few feet from the unconscious Samus. He saw Ragnell clatter to the ground, useless now that it was out of his reach. He was shaken like a tambourine by the huge thing's erratic flight.
Peach looked up and panicked, as Ike and Samus hung, helpless, in Ridley's claws. She looked around, and saw Ike's Ragnell fall to the ground.
Ike's eyebrows shot up. "Impressive," he said to her. "I shudder to think of what you could do with a sword."
A sword! Peach ran across the floor and picked up Ragnell. She held it in one hand like she held her frying pan. Ridley laughed outright. "You, even injure me with a sword?"
Peach immediately felt a disgust for the owner of that sanctimonious, mocking voice. She only had one shot at this...
She aimed and threw Ragnell with all her strength. It flew up toward Ridley's eye, where Peach had been aiming. But it missed, lodging in the tender flesh of his nose.
Ridley cried out, dropping his two captives to the floor. Shaking his head, he dislodged the sword. It fell to the ground and embedded itself next to Ike, who lay unconscious. Samus was next to him. Her suit sparked dangerously. Ridley flapped his huge wings and soared away. "Don't think you're getting away from here alive!"
Peach raced over to them. Ike seemed fairly unhurt, but Samus was bleeding from Ridley's claws and her suit was broken. Peach ran over and began to tear away the sparking, electrocuted sections of the suit from Samus' body, hoping that they had not already stopped her heart.
Suddenly, Ike was awake. Without a word he moved to Samus' other side and helped Peach at her task. His face was quiet and full of concern. Quickly enough, they had gotten rid of the suit of mechanical armour, and Samus was left with her light blue bodysuit. Her hair was tangled and spread out beneath her, surrounded by her helmet, cracked into two pieces. Peach loosed Samus' gun from its holster at the hip of her suit. It seemed alright. Peach lay it next to her.
"We should bandage her wounds," said Ike. He felt around in his backpack, never taking his eyes off of Samus. "I don't know if I have any, but... aha!" He pulled out a roll of bandages, and a bottle of what Peach assumed was a wound-cleaner. "Although I don't remember putting them in there..." Then he smiled fondly and laughed. "Mist! I'll have to thank her for that." At Peach's confused look, he explained, "Mist is my sister. She sometimes gets worried when I go off on my own, and she sneaks bandages into my pack so I'll have them if I get hurt."
"Oh," said Peach. "Let me do it, Ike, I've done it a lot before. You might be hurt too. See if you're injured." Ike handed her the bandages and she set to work tying Samus' wounds. Before she did, she had to pick out the pieces of metal inside them, where bits of the suit had broken off. Peach made sure she had taken off her white gloves, but she shivered at the feel of Samus' warm blood on her hands.
"Oh," said Ike.
"What is it?" Peach asked, not looking up.
"I never felt that there..." Peach looked up to see Ike looking worriedly at a large gash on his side. "Do you think that thing... Ridley I think she called it, was poisonous?"
"Samus never said anything about it," said Peach. Then she thought a moment. "A natural painkiller in his claws, maybe? Whatever it is, we should clean your wound and then patch it up like I did with Samus'."
Ike leaned on one arm, exposing his wounded side to Peach. She paused - his shirt was partially covering the wound. "Ike, your shirt." Ike nodded and lifted the bottom of his shirt, revealing a bloody wound and quickly bruising ribs. He grimaced when a thread pulled out of the wound. Peach wet a piece of the bandage with the wound-cleaner and washed the gash. Ike gritted his teeth. The wound-cleaner stung, but he did not move until Peach had tied the bandage in place. "There," she said, getting to her feet.
"Thanks," Ike said. He got to his feet as well, stretching hesitantly. Then he smiled.
The two heard a small moan. They turned to see Samus moving slightly. Her eyes were open, but she squinted.
"Samus!" said Peach.
"What happened?" she asked. "Where's Ridley?"
"I'm not sure myself what happened, but I think Peach took him out," said Ike.
"With your sword," Peach said, slightly apologetic.
Ike laughed. Then he stopped, with a groan, clapped a hand to his side, and winced even more. "Owch!" he said.
"Did you clean that?" Samus asked, seeming slightly more luid. "Ridley's claws secrete a natural anaesthetic, but it's also a slow-acting poison. I have the antidote in my suit..." she looked down at herself. "But where's my suit?"
"Over there," said Peach. "We had to get it off you before it electrocuted you. But I salvaged your handgun."
Samus looked at the sparking remains of her suit of armour. "Oh," she said. "The antidote is in an unbreakable case, so it's probably still intact." She got to her feet, with Peach's help, limped over to her suit. She carefully searched through the bits, wearing a rubber glove. After a moment, she came up with a beaker. "Peach, did Ridley touch you?"
"No," said Peach.
"Then Ike and I will split this." Samus drank a mouthful of some red substance, then handed it to Ike. "Drink everything that's left. It's also a very high-quality healing potion, so our wounds should get better quickly."
Ike obeyed. He made a face the moment the liquid touched his tongue. "That's just disgusting," he said. But he drank it.
"We should get moving," said Samus. "Ridley is sure to be back."
"But we can't go very far," said Peach. "Ike, your sword is right over there. I'm going to find the Key we've been looking for." Peach strode off, leaving Ike slowly yanking his sword out of the ground, and Samus staring at the remains of her was my protection, Samus thought. And it was true. While she often took off her helmet around her close friends, she was almost never without her suit. It was her impenetrable armour, hiding her and protecting her. She wasn't so sure that she liked being so out in the open. Anyone could see her for who she was now.
"Samus?" Ike asked. "Are you OK?"
"I'm fine," she said. "I can build another suit."
Ike looked at her, thoughtful. He could tell by her voice that she wasn't OK. It was just a machine... yeah, he laughed to himself, just like Ragnell is just a sword. I'd be crushed if it broke. Her suit must be a part of her... maybe she even built it herself. He began to wonder what he could do to cheer his newfound friend up. With a final pull, he got his sword out of the ground. He made to put it back in his sheath, but then he looked at it more carefully. Something greenish covered the sword, clumping on the sides and generally looking and smelling vile.
"Uh..." he said, wondering what it was.
Samus looked over. Then she walked over and bent slightly, examining the sword. Suddenly, her shoulders began to shake. She laughed, harder and harder, until she was forced to her knees, gasping in pain but laughing all the while.
"Ike," she said, once she had recovered, wiping tears of laughter out of her eyes. "That's Ridley's snot."
"What?" Ike cried. He looked harder at it. It did indeed look like boogers. "... that's nasty."
"Don't get it near me," Samus said, sounding slightly hysterical with laughter. "My grossness quota has been overfilled. I had to deal with Kraid's spit. I don't even want to go near Ridley's snot."
Ike, laughing a bit himself, held the sword out at Samus, who retreated. Ike walked closer, still holding the disgusting sword out in front of him. Samus moved away. After a moment, they were chasing each other in circles like children, laughing, their wounds forgotten.
"Well," said Peach, walking back, a key in her hand. The two stopped, suddenly ashamed of their behaviour. "Aren't we having fun! Well, I'm glad to see you've both recovered so quickly." Neither answered. Then, Peach's expression softened, and she said, "Well, better acting silly than dead. Come on, I found what Samus and I are looking for."
The little group wandered back toward where Samus and Peach had gone through the gates. Ike stopped at a stream to carefully clean his sword off. He went back to Peach and Samus, and they continued on.
"So, Ike," said Peach. "What were you doing here anyway?"
"I was lost, actually," said Ike. "I went on a scouting mission for my Mercenary group, and I got sidetracked chasing someone who stole something of mine. I got it back, though."
"Ah," said Peach. "I see. Hoping we'll get you back on track?"
"That's right," Ike said.
Samus looked up. "The sun is almost setting," she said.
"We should rest," said Peach.
The group sat down. Peach and Samus made beds out of the leaves that coated the forest floor, while Ike laid out his cape and sat down on it. "I'll keep watch," he volunteered.
"Oh, no," said Peach. "Potion or no, you are still injured. I will keep watch. You two are going to get some rest, or I will make you." She pulled out her frying pan and waved it menacingly at them.
Neither were planning on annoying Peach, who was scary even without the frying pan when she wanted to be. So they both fell asleep fairly quickly.
The next day, it only took them a while to get to the gate the two had come through.
"Aha!" said Ike. He pointed at another gate. "That's where I came from."
"So you're leaving?" Peach asked.
"Yeah," said Ike. "But I'm sure we'll meet again. After all, I think you two have a tendency to be wherever there's trouble, and I'll be there too. So we'll see each other again."
"Goodbye, then," said Samus to Ike.
"Until we meet again." He looked straight at her, his face solemn for once. He shook hands with Peach, then held his hand out to Samus. She shook it.
"Good luck!" called Samus, as Ike disappeared into the other gate.
"See you!" his voice floated back through the portal.
The two looked at each other for a moment, sad to lose their new found friend so fast. "Well, we should head back," said Peach.
"Yeah," said Samus.
The two walked through the door.
"Thank'a the gods!" cried Mario, rushing forward to embrace Peach. She laughed and hugged him back.
"Who are you? Where's Samus?" Roy cried out, pointing at Samus. Samus then remembered that Roy still thought of 'Samus' as a guy.
"I am Samus," Samus said.
Roy looked shocked. "SAMUS CHANGED GENDERS!" he screamed.
The entire gathering looked at him, silent. Then Samus snorted with laughter and she, Zelda, and Peach fell over laughing.
"Roy," said Zelda, "Samus was a girl all along. She'd been hiding her gender from you all."
"Can you prove it?" asked Marth.
"Yes, I can, Martha," Samus said, using the nickname Roy had made up that so annoyed Marth.
"She's Samus," said Marth, looking unhappy. Young Link sputtered with laughter.
"Martha?" he laughed. Popo and Ness joined in. While the three little boys laughed, Nana walked over and patted Marth on the hand, pitying him. Marth smiled at the little girl, who went to go try to shut her big brother and his friends up.
"Stop it!" she said to them. "Marth's a nice man. Don't tease him."
The boys tried to calm themselves down, but then Popo sputtered with laughter again. Nana looked back at Marth, tears in her eyes.
"It's ok, Nana," he said to her. "It doesn't matter. They're just being silly." He walked over and patted her on the head.
"Ok," she said.
"We got the key," said Peach. "And we had some help..."
In the words of Takimi (in a review from her original creator, 'someone')
Ike. Samus. Heh heh heh.
Seriously, I didn't intend them to be like that the first time, but since that's how it goes, I made it a bit more obvious. I also made Peach's bandaging of Ike's wound a bit more practical.