AN: Credit goes to Kami Count D, Speedstreak360, fan girl 666 and strutless.

(G1)

Optimus blinked at the shuttle before him, "I'm sorry?" he asked after a while.

Skyfire couldn't have looked more distraught had he tried, "Starscream!" he cried again, "We have to save him."

Optimus shook his helm, trying to get his head around the situation, "You want us to break into the Decepticon base to save Starscream?" he reaffirmed, "because you think Megatron is...?"

"Rape!" Skyfire cried desperately, "Prime, sir, please. You weren't there. You didn't see him, he grabbed Starscream, and, and he-"

Optimus held up a servo, "It is well known that Megatron and Starscream are abusive towards each other; but nothing has ever implied that Megatron would-"

"I saw it!" Skyfire cried again, "I was there!"

Optimus rubbed a servo across his helm, sighing. He knew Megatron -well, he thought he'd known him- but for all the dastardly plots the Gunformer was known for coming up with, he never would have thought the Decepticon Commander would sink so low as to rape his own second. He had always assumed he was at least fond of the seeker; Primus knew he put up with him a lot better than Optimus could ever imagine he would be capable of.

"If what you say is true-" Optimus began.

"It is!" Skyfire cried.

Prime nodded his helm, "Then I suppose we have no choice but to... rescue Starscream from Megatron's clutches."

The shuttle looked mightily relieved. "Thank you so much Prime. You have no idea what this means to me. Starscream's a good mech, and you'll see that when we bring him back here."

Optimus shook his helm. Starscream was a 'good mech'?! He doubted that. Skyfire had been frozen for a very long time. "Starscream has changed Skyfire." he said sternly, "As have we all. The war has hardened many, and broken more".

Skyfire didn't appear to be listening. "He'll make a great Autobot, I know he will."

Optimus frowned as it sounded more like the shuttle was trying to convince himself than him.

It was probably the worst thing he'd ever agreed to, but Optimus went ahead with it. He didn't want to think about what the seeker's reaction to this would be.

His assumptions were proved correct only too soon the next cycle however.

He was saved from having to organise a 'rescue mission' for the Decepticon Air Commander when Megatron staged another raid at a power station. So far, he had seen no sign of the Decepticon leader himself. He was probably still inside the power station, shouting at everyone.

"Prowl! Evacuate the humans!" he ordered, optics flickering suspiciously towards the large shuttle not-so-subtly approaching the power station. "Skyfire," he called sternly, approaching the shuttle, "Do not engage the Decepticons until after the area has been cleared of humans."

Skyfire sighed heavily, looking towards the power station where Starscream was bound to be before turning back as his leader had ordered, "Yes sir." he murmured dejectedly.

Optimus soon found that his attempts at keeping Skyfire away from any volatile seekers was pointless, especially when Starscream burst through the roof of the power plant, shrieking a war cry, a small collection of seekers following after. Skyfire was jetting towards the seeker before Optimus could even open his mouth to stop him.

He wasn't at liberty to watch what had to have been a highly entertaining confrontation between the two of them as the battle quickly went underway, that was until Prowl comm.'d him for backup.

His second was very vague on the comm. but Optimus had a fairly good idea of what lay in wait for him behind the power station, where the fight had already finished. He could hear it long before he saw the pandemonium.

"Alright, calm down Screamer!" he heard Ironhide shouting loudly, "Skyfire, tell him-"

"Let go off me! LET GO!" Starscream howled loudly.

Optimus turned the corner to see that last thing he has wanted to see. It would seem Skyfire had successfully rescued Starscream. Only Starscream really didn't seem to want rescuing. Optimus could hardly say he was surprised...

Skyfire held the seeker off the ground, one huge arm wrapped around Starscream's frame, keeping his arms trapped to his sides. The only parts of the seeker free were his legs, which he was kicking enthusiastically.

"Please calm down Starscream," Skyfire pleaded, his expression hurt, "It's going to be okay now. I'll keep you safe."

Starscream reply was an incoherent scream.

Optimus shook his helm and stepped forward, joining Ironhide and Prowl in front of the two struggling fliers. "Perhaps you should put him down Skyfire," Optimus suggested, concerned that if the seeker fought any harder he might end up hurting himself.

Skyfire looked at Prime and seemed inclined to agree. He awkwardly lowered the shrieking Starscream, letting his thrusters touch the ground as he uncurled his arms from around the seeker's slight waist. Starscream tried to lunge away at the first opportunity but Skyfire was quick to grab hold of his wrist, wrenching his arm at an awkward angle to prevent his escape.

Starscream started howling again.

Optimus rubbed a servo behind his helm awkwardly. This wasn't going to end well. He glanced over his shoulder cautiously, wandering how long they had until Megatron heard Starscream's incensed screeching and came to put a stop to this rescue mission of theirs.

"Starscream, Starscream! Please! We're here to rescue you-"

Starscream whirled around and sent his free servo flying into Skyfire's face. "Rescue!" he howled as Ironhide stepped forward to help the disorientated shuttle, "You're kidnapping me! You fragging- get off! LET GO OF ME!" He thrashed harder as Ironhide took hold of his other arm.

"We're saving you!" Skyfire cried, one servo pressed to the new dent in his cheek plate, "We're taking you away from Megatron, he can't-"

"I want to stay with Megatron!" Starscream howled, "It's better than you! Better than- than- oh get off Skyfire!"

"Bu-but Starscream!" Skyfire cried aghast, "He-he ra-"

"He loves me!" Starscream howled, trying to lift his leg high enough to kick one of them off.

Ironhide released him out of pure shock.

But Skyfire was more resilient, "Starscream he rapes you!"

Starscream stopped struggling long enough to stare at him incredulously. Optimus dulled his audial sensors in anticipation of the seeker's explosion.

"...Rape," Starscream whimpered after a while, almost lulling Optimus into a false sense of security that his audials wouldn't be blown out before- "RAPE?!"

He winced and backed away, this was something Skyfire could deal with.

"But- but I saw him! I saw him rape you!"

Starscream hissed and clawed at the servo still holding his wrist captive, "He was reclaiming his property after you kissed me! Without even asking!"

Optimus raised an optical ridge and glanced at Skyfire curiously.

"I, I-"

"If anyone's the sexual assailant here it's you!" Starscream snarled, "Now let me go!"

"No!" Skyfire argued forcibly, "No I won't let you go back to him! I won't let him abuse you!"

"He's my... He's my boyfriend!" Starscream snapped, unable to think of another word to describe his and Megatron's relationship. He squirmed furiously, "Release me now you processor-less glitches! Megatron! Megatrooooon!"

Skyfire hurriedly slapped his servo over the seeker's howling mouth, "He doesn't know what he's saying," He told Optimus, "he's confused, disorientated- oww!"

Skyfire pulled his servo away from Starscream's mouth as it was bitten.

"MEGATROOOON!"

"Stop it Starscream! He'll hear-"

"I hope he does! And I hope he pounds it into your thick processor that I. Don't. Want. You!"

Skyfire looked more than a little hurt, "St-Star... I love you."

Optimus decided he needed to step in now, "Skyfire, let him go. You can't force him."

"Yes! Listen to your Prime, fool!" Starscream added, tugging at his servo again.

Skyfire's gaze hardened again, "I can't do that Starscream. I can't lose you again."

Starscream's face twisted into something hateful, "You never had me," he snarled.

"Skyfire," Optimus spoke up again, "I-"

He cut himself off as he heard the whir of a weapon charging and felt something heating up against his back. Ironhide and Prowl whirled around and aimed their own weapons at whoever was stood directly behind their Prime.

"Really Starscream," Optimus heard Megatron's deep voice rasp behind him, "This is the second time I've caught you with this shuttle..."

"It's not what you think!" Starscream howled, thrusters scrapping up dirt as he scrambled to be free and get to his leader, "He's trying to kidnap me!"

Megatron swung his cannon and aimed it at Skyfire instead, giving Optimus the chance to turn around and back away, heating up his own weapons and directing them at Megatron.

"Skyfire, release Starscream." Optimus ordered, "I won't permit you to force a mech into another faction against his will."

"As a prisoner then!" Skyfire said quickly, tugging Starscream back towards him, "Please Prime."

Optimus was at a loss for what to say, so Megatron clearly decided to take control of the situation. He lowered his arm cannon and strode towards the two fliers, Optimus, Ironhide and Prowl could do nothing but watch as Megatron snatched hold of Starscream's other servo and both fired at Skyfire and tugged Starscream out of his grasp in one fluid movement.

Skyfire fell to a smoking heap on the ground, a huge charred hole through his left wing.

Starscream didn't even glance back over his shoulder at him as Megatron dragged him to a relatively safe distance before bending him over for a deep kiss.

Optimus rolled his optics and walked over towards where Ironhide and Prowl were trying and failing to lift Skyfire and bring him back around. He looked back at the two Decepticons and grimaced, "I think it would be best if we waited until after we're back at base to bring him around." Optimus said gently.

Ironhide looked past Optimus and quickly looked away, "Sweet Primus..." he muttered, tossing Skyfire's arm over his shoulders, "Let's leave, quickly..."

As Megatron and Starscream fell into a tangle of limbs on the muddy ground behind them, Optimus took Skyfire's other arm and moved as quickly as he could, Starscream's moans following them.

(G1)

Starscream stared.

"Your sire," he hissed incredulously.

Megatron exhaled heavily and nodded, waiting for insult that was bound to come.

"He's still alive?!"

Megatron scowled, "Yes," he said stiffly, "and he's coming to... visit," he spat out. "It seems he's intent on seeing his..." Megatron levelled a glare on the tiny golden sparkling fussing in his bondmate's arms, "his grandson."

Starscream hugged Sunstorm closer to his cockpit, "And how is it that I've never met this... sire of yours?"

Megatron rubbed the back of his helm, "He wasn't aware I had a bondmate."

Starscream's optics widened considerably, "You didn't tell him?! So- so where does he think Sunstorm came from? What does he think I am?!"

Megatron waved him off, "He knows now," he explained, "It's just that he only found out yesterday."

Starscream's optics narrowed suspiciously, "...Why?"

"Why what?"

Starscream's optics narrowed even further, "Why didn't you tell him you were bonded? Did you not think it was important enough to bother him with? Or... is it that you're ashamed of me?"

Megatron swallowed thickly. This would be a difficult question to answer. Instead he made a show of checking his chronometer. "As much as I'd love to continue our discussion, we haven't the time. My sire will be arriving in a breem or two-"

"A BREEM?!" Starscream yelped, "And you tell me now?! What's he's going to think!? I look like slag!"

Megatron waved him off again, "It doesn't matter, you always do."

He missed Starscream's deadly expression as he reached out to look over Sunstorm, "Clean him up and see if you can get him into recharge, and for the love of Primus make sure he doesn't start glowing again!"

Starscream sneered and hitched the sparkling up to lie on his chest, "Fine," he hissed. "But!" he called out as Megatron made to leave, "I have one more question."

Megatron rolled his optics and turned around to glare at his bondmate, "What!?" he snapped.

Starscream looked at him sternly, "Does he know I'm a seeker?"

There was a very long pause.

"I haven't broken the news to him yet.'

Starscream did not look impressed, "Broken the news?!" he howled, waving his free arm animatedly. Sunstorm, in his arms, giggled happily and started to shine. Starscream didn't notice. "He's lucky to have a seeker, have me as an in-law! That's if I even remain bonded to you after today!"

Megatron backed away warily as Sunstorm brightened even more, "Starscream..." he began.

"DON'T STARSCREAM ME YOU AFT!" the seeker shrieked, "You tell your fragging sire that me AND my fragging offspring are as good as either of you are ever going to fragging get!"

Megatron nodded, and continued with his backwards pace, "Yes Starscream," he murmured obediently, optics still on his radioactive sparkling, who was glowing brighter and brighter with each passing second.

Starscream huffed, "Good," he growled, "Now why don't you go and polish, or at least wash. I don't want your sire thinking I can't take care of you..."

Megatron stared after the beam of light that was now his sparkling and bondmate. Since when had Starscream ever taken care of anyone?! He couldn't even look after Sunstorm...

After doing as Starscream had ordered -not because he had ordered him to do it, but because he was going to do it anyway- the time to introduce his new family to perhaps the only mech that still had the ability to intimidate him, if only slightly, had finally come.

To his horror, Starscream had gotten to him first.

Galvatron stood tall and broad in all his purple glory before Starscream who was, thankfully, not shrieking. For once.

"Ah!" Galvatron called as soon as he spotted Megatron, "Nice to finally see you." he said with a hint of sarcasm as the Decepticon commander came to a stop awkwardly behind his bondmate.

"Hello sire," Megatron mumbled stiffly.

But his sire seemed far more interested in Starscream. "So, why didn't you tell me sooner you'd managed to catch yourselves such an stunning young seeker," and then, like the cliché he was, Galvatron reached out to catch the servo Starscream had readily extended, and brought it to his mouth to kiss.

Megatron pulled a face, and Starscream laughed loudly, obnoxiously, and... Girly.

Megatron winced and Sunstorm stared up at his carrier in both confusion and horror at the awful noise.

"Oh you do flatter," Starscream said silkily, shoving Sunstorm into Megatron's arms as he moved closer to Galvatron, "Though I could ask the same question. Why has he been hiding his charming sire all these vorns?"

Galvatron grinned an all too familiar grin and Megatron scowled as he said, "I can only assume he thought I'd show him up."

Starscream smirked, "You are," he purred, optics dimming seductively.

Megatron blinked, was Starscream really flirting with sire right in front of him? REALLY?!

"Just a shame you can't get it up anymore isn't it sire." Megatron said happily, and then took his sire's shocked expression as an opportunity to force his sparkling into his arms, "This is Sunstorm but the way, the sparkling you came to see." he said sternly, optics narrowing at the purple mech.

Galvatron scowled at him, but Megatron smirked, catching a glimpse of Starscream subtly trying to muffle his laughter behind his servo.

"Ah, yes..." Galvatron murmured as he held the seekerlet up and frowned at him, "hmmm..."

Both Starscream and Megatron glared at what appeared to be an inspection of their sparkling, and a perfect sparkling at that.

"...Why is he gold?" Galvatron asked after a while.

With the speed of lightning Starscream reached up and snatched his sparkling back, "Because I like the colour!" he snapped, not prepared to go into the long, complicated and rather incriminating story of how he essentially mutilated his sparkling only two weeks into carrying him by binge drinking.

Galvatron seemed to get the impression that he shouldn't enquire any further.

"If that is all sire," Megatron said as he moved forward to usher his creator from the base, and his life, at least until the older mech made up another excuse to pry into his life.

Galvatron held his ground, "But I've only just arrived," he protested, "I haven't seen you in twenty vorns! You're not really going to send me off after a mere glimpse of-"

"You've had plenty more than a glimpse." Megatron hissed in his face, "Now I have business to attend to."

Galvatron lifted an optical ridge, "What business?"

Megatron opened his mouth to make some unbelievable slag up when all of sudden he found a Starscream in the way.

Sunstorm was trapped between their chests as Starscream stood on the very tips of his thrusters and forced his glossa down his throat, kissing him long and hard enough to make his optics unfocused. When he was finally released he stumbled back slightly, dazed.

"That kind of business!" he heard Starscream snootily inform his sire.

Megatron hurriedly blinked away his disorientation, to see Galvatron grinning broadly at them. He lifted a servo before turning away to leave, "I'd like to be informed when you have more." he said as he left, "Which I imagine won't be too long await. In which case," he paused and tossed a little wave their way, "I'll see you soon."

And with that he was gone.

Megatron was quite confused. "Have anymore what?"

Starscream sent a quick comm. to Skywarp for him to pick up Sunstorm before pushing himself up against his bondmate's broad frame, trailing a digit down his chest plates, "Why don't I show you instead?"

(Anyverse)

Starscream did not like the look on Megatron's face as this mysterious 'old friend' of his waved at him as she left.

"Who is she?" he snapped the second the doors closed behind her.

Megatron peered down at him and snorted, "I told you, an old frie-"

"THAT! Was not an old friend," Starscream squawked, "Your old friends tend to end up on the other side of the war and are pit bent on taking your helm off your shoulders, so, I'll ask you again. Who is she?"

Megatron stared at Starscream like he didn't know what to say. So Starscream jumped to the point, "Have you interfaced with her."

"Yes," answered Megatron quickly. With a dismissive gesture he turned away, trying to escape Starscream's outburst.

"I KNEW IT!" he howled, "You disgust me! You two -timing slag face-"

"Starscream," Megatron said quickly, "It was ten thousand vorns ago. I doubt she even remembers."

"She tried to touch your aft!" Starscream shrieked.

Megatron rolled his optics, he highly doubted that. "Stop overreacting." Megatron growled, "You're starting to give me a processor ache."

Starscream hissed low, "Oh," he sneered sarcastically, "Well I am so sorry,"

Megatron stated at the idiot, "You're making it worse," he grumbled.

"GOOD!" Starscream squawked, "Just because I'm crazy doesn't mean I'm stupid!" he continued to screech, "I know there is something going on between you two-"

"She just got here," Megatron protested, "You haven't even given me a chance to cheat on you yet."

"So you were going to cheat on me?!"

"MAYBE!" Megatron bellowed back, finally out of patience, "Because at least she doesn't shriek at me for imaginary affairs!"

Starscream's wings shook with fury, he looked like he was about to explode. "What's she have that I don't!" he eventually burst out, puffing his chest out proudly.

Megatron merely smirked and poked him in the chests plates, "More up here for a start," he rumbled, gesturing to Starscream's chest itself, "And she's not quite as... Bulky."

Starscream's mouth dropped open indignantly, "BULKY! I'm not bulky! You fragger! Ask any mech, any mech on this ship and not one of them would turn me down. I'm the best you'll ever fragging have and you know it!"

Megatron drew back and flashed a smirk at him over his shoulder, "Then why on Cybertron do you feel so threatened by an old flame Starscream?"

Starscream hissed low as he watched his leader leave. He wouldn't feel threatened for long, he'd take care of this.

It turned out Megatron wasn't nearly as impressed as he thought he'd be when he heard the news.

"So," he growled, "...She just fell out of the air lock did she?"

Starscream nodded enthusiastically, "Yes, it was dreadful my lord, I tried to catch her but... She had already drifted well out of range."

Megatron optics twitched, "And you were the only one to see this incident?"

Starscream nodded sadly, "I called for help, but no one came."

Megatron sneered at his second's poor acting skills, "There is something that doesn't quite add up though Starscream,"

Starscream's optics flashed; what had he forgotten? He had made sure there had been no witnesses other than himself... "And what would that be, my lord?"

Megatron scowled at him, "You're a seeker Starscream, why didn't you fly out after her and bring her back."

Starscream stared for a moment, "...I... Forgot."

"Forgot to fly out after her, or forgot to factor that little detail into your grand scheme?"

Starscream kicked the floor with his thrusters, looking down, "...It's not like she was important for anything!"

Megatron growled as he pushed himself out of his throne, "Starscream, I have had many, many past lovers. You can't possibly offline them all, so I suggest you give up now."

Starscream smiled slightly, "Oh really? What were their names?" he asked innocently.

Megatron's expression darkened, "I'm letting you get away with it this one time, but if you go out of your way to deactivate any more potential Decepticons all because you're feeling jealous, you will be punished."

Unsurprisingly, Starscream grinned nastily and pushed closer to Megatron, "Ooh," he said excitedly, "What sort of punishment?"

Megatron's scowl was unwavering, "The bad sort." he growled until the seeker took that ridiculous expression off his face.

Starscream huffed and pulled away angrily, when his wrist was caught.

"Starscream," Megatron added, tugging him back to his chest. He grabbed the seeker's jaw and dragged him up for a kiss, "It's not like any of them could ever really compete anyway."

(G1)

Starscream looked around the peaceful, empty meadow in complete confusion. "...Is this where you plan to offline me brutally and hide the evidence?" he asked calmly.

Megatron chuckled behind him and reached out to rub his wing tip, "Not at all my dear." he murmured silkily, "I merely thought we could use some privacy."

Starscream's optics lit up in realisation, "Oh, so this is that kind of outing." he said, pushing his wings into Megatron's servos and revving his jet engine, "You could have just asked-"

He stopped when Megatron pulled away from him. "What?" he asked curiosity, turning around.

"We're not here for that," his leader told him, smiling in a... weird, almost unnerving, way.

Starscream frowned in complete confusion, "Then, what are we here for?"

Megatron shifted on the spot awkwardly for a moment, before puffing up his chest and taking a deep breath. Starscream watched him silently as he lowered himself down onto one knee.

"Starscream," he began, that smile working its way onto his face again, "Will you-"

"ATTACK!"

Megatron jumped up as Starscream whirled around just in time to see a flood of Autobots break through the tree line on the opposite side of the meadow, all of them brandishing weapons and firing randomly.

Before Megatron's mouth could even drop open at the sheer coincidence that they'd be in the same place at the same time another war cry sounded behind him; this time belonging to his own faction. The majority of Decepticons rushed by them, all screaming like lunatics and firing with almost as much aim as the Autobots seemed to be. He couldn't remember planning any battle/raid or otherwise.

When he turned back however, Starscream had vanished, obviously having joined the fray.

Fraggit. He was torn between seeking out Prime and ripping him to shreds for ruining what was almost a perfect proposal and finding Starscream so he could actually do it.

As detestable as the fact was, love won out over hatred and he rushed off in search of his bondmate to be... That's if he said yes anyway.

He caught a flash of red, white and blue grappling with a huge red Autobot and sprinted in that direction. He was almost within shouting distance when something huge and heavy and undeniably Optimus fragging Prime collided into his side. Incensed, he kicked Prime right in the helm and threw his dazed frame off.

He clambered to his pedes again, having to do a stupid looking dance to keep Prime from grabbing his ankles and pulling him down again. In the end he had to kick him a few more times to ensure he'd stay down long enough for him to shout a five word sentence to his Air Commander.

Once Prime had been suitably utilised, for what was probably going to be only half a minute knowing the Autobot leader, Megatron able to get close enough to his seeker.

"STARSCREAM!" he bellowed in the seeker's direction.

Starscream turned, frowning in confusion and looking through the battle field until he caught sight of him. He opened his mouth and Megatron barely heard a "What?!" shouted back.

He took a deep breath, "WILL YOU BOND WITH ME!?" he roared.

Starscream just stood on the spot staring at him, still frowning. Megatron's spark skipped a beat before...

"...WHAT?!"

Megatron rolled his optics and grumbled in irritation.

"I SAID! WILL YOU BO-"

Before he could finished his sentence he was tackled to the dirt again.

"You've lost Megatron!" Optimus announced from his position sat on top of him.

Megatron snarled and thrashed until he'd successfully dislodged the Prime. He wasn't fragging here to win; in fact, he didn't even know what he fighting over at this present moment in time. He punched Optimus hard enough to crack his facemask, and it was very, very tempting to just reach out and rip it the rest of the way off to finally reveal that damned face of his. But there were more pressing matters to attend to.

"STARSCREAAAAAAM!" he bellowed, cupping his servos around his mouth.

Again the seeker looked up, rather irritated looking now, "WHAAAAAAT?!"

"CAN YOU HEAR MEEE!?"

Starscream nodded.

Now was his chance. Megatron took another deep breath, "WILL YOU-"

And then Starscream disappeared from sight. It took Megatron a moment to realise someone had tackled him, much like Prime just had him. Speaking of the Prime-

Megatron punched him again before he could get up and then promptly stormed off in the direction he had last seen Starscream.

He pushed several mechs to the floor, regardless of faction, as he forced his way through them, mostly notable of which being a very confused, hurt looking Soundwave, before he finally reached Starscream, rolling in the mud with the yellow Autobot twin.

Megatron reached down and tugged him off Starscream, tossing him to the side.

"SHUT UP!" he bellowed to those still firing around him, before pushing another Autobot over who hadn't obeyed him. The firing dulled down considerably and he could hear himself think again but he didn't wait for complete silence before reaching down, wrenching his filth covered seeker from the mud and kissing him hard and fast on the mouth.

Starscream looked stunned as he pulled back, but he left no room to any protests.

"Starscream," he said quickly and breathlessly, "Will you bond with me?"

Now the meadow was completely silent. No war cries, gun fire, crashing of armour on armour... just the heightened sound of his intakes and the thudding of his spark. He was aware of everyone, Autobot and Decepticon alike, staring at them, but all that mattered was Starscream.

The pause lasted mere seconds, but to him it felt like hours, so he was only too relieved when Starscream's expression broke out into a grin, "Yes." he said happily, "Yes I will bond with y-" he was cut off as Megatron moved in for another kiss, this time scooping the seeker into his arms and holding him up, above the ground.

Megatron was too busy fighting for dominance in Starscream's mouth to see Prime clap loudly but slowly, a slight smile on his faceplates. Nor did he take notice of the loud applause that grew afterwards from both factions. Alongside the clapping was unnecessary woohoo'ing from Jazz, and the loud shouts of someone who was either the Autobot Twins or just as likely Skywarp yelling, "Get in there Screamer!"

Megatron didn't care either way; because Starscream said yes.

(G1)

Megatron hadn't been expecting the comm. but it was welcome regardless. He was secretly pleased to see the smirking visage of his second in command and not that of the not nearly as pleasant to look upon single optic'd Shockwave, though he didn't show it, his expression unwavering from stern and emotionless.

Starscream beamed at him anyway, undeterred by Megatron's scowl, and fairly used to it.

"Have you missed me?" he squawked happily over the comm. leaning in and filling almost the entire screen with his dark, handsome face.

Megatron almost, almost, smiled at his enthusiasm. "No," he lied.

Starscream's smirk widened, detecting the lie. Megatron silently cursed himself.

"Do try to cheer up my Lord," Starscream purred silkily over the comm. "Think, you're not here, on Cybertron, with him."

Though Starscream was still smirking, Megatron could clearly tell the seeker was not pleased with the situation. "Shockwave is bothering you?" he asked curiously, with false surprise.

Starscream outright scowled now, "I want him dead." he hissed at Megatron, voice lowered, "I want to rip out his damn optic and stuff it right up his-"

Starscream cut off and looked to the side, somewhere out of shot. Megatron should have taken the seeker's annoyed expression as enough of a hint to terminate the comm. link and run for it, but he didn't. He hadn't spoken to Starscream in over a week fraggit, and farces be damned, he'd missed his little glitch.

He seriously regretted thinking such a thing as he heard Shockwave's voice, "Oh, is that Lord Megatron!?"

Megatron sat bolt upright in his seat and waved his arms like a maniac, "No!" he mouthed at Starscream, "Don't you dare"

Starscream's expression was somewhere between a sneer and a smirk. "Why of course it is, and oh! I think he wants to speak with you Shockwave."

Megatron made an obscene gesture at his second as Shockwave shoved his way into the view of the comm. link, hiding Starscream from view. Megatron sighed heavily.

"Lord Megatron!" Shockwave said excitedly, "To what do I owe this honour-"

Megatron waved him off, wasting no time to save Shockwave's feelings, Primus only knew how long he had in here before one of his subordinates walked in and interrupted them again. "Yes, thank you Shockwave." he said stiffly, "but I'm afraid there had been a mistake. I do not want or need to speak with you."

Had Shockwave owned a face, it would probably have looked spark-broken then. But he didn't, and Megatron felt very little guilt as Shockwave slumped, mumbling something sadly as he moved out of the screen again.

Megatron relaxed back into his seat again to see Starscream shaking his helm in disappointment, "That was a little rude-"

"Shut up Starscream," Megatron cut across him, "What are you calling for?"

Starscream looked surprised, "I would have thought that was obvious."

Megatron arched an optical ridge, "What?"

They fell into an awkward silence, and when it became obvious Starscream had no intention of answering him, Megatron wisely changed the subject to something more productive.

"Touch yourself," he ordered.

It took Starscream a moment to realise what he'd just been told to do. He pulled a face, "Excuse me!?"

Megatron rolled his optics, "It has been a week after all, you can't expect me to wait another before you return to Earth."

Starscream did not look amused; his optics narrowed dangerously, "Then go and frag a drone," he snarled stiffly, "There is no way in pit I am going to entertain you like that over a comm. link when Shockwave is in the next room!"

Megatron's smirk widened, "But you would do me the pleasure of self-serving on camera if he wasn't in the next room?"

Starscream stared him down for a long time, "...Maybe." he muttered out of the corner of his mouth quietly, "BUT I didn't comm. you to humiliate myself, so you can and will wait until I return."

Megatron huffed, "It's been the pit down here without you."

Starscream's optics brightened in hope.

Megatron quickly corrected himself, "Your trine mates are being difficult," he blurted out before the seeker could assume, or figure out, that his wish for his quick return was out of more than just his desire to frag him. A lot more.

"Oh..." Starscream said, looking down, "Just shoot at them," he said waving a servo, "Usually works..."

And then there was that awkward silence again.

"...Have you missed me?" Starscream piped up again.

Megatron slumped back in his seat and stared at the ceiling, "Does it matter?!" he growled, exasperated.

Starscream pouted, "It does to me."

"I would prefer it if you were back here, but I haven't missed you."

Starscream smirked, "That is missing!" he snapped, jabbing his finger into the screen at Megatron accusingly. "Admit it! You've missed me!"

Megatron scowled and folded his arms across his chest as he watched the seeker do what appeared to be a happy dance on the screen. All he could do was wait until he finished, it wasn't like he could just cut the comm. link. Starscream might not pick back up again if he tried to call back. So he endured it, even as the imbecilic seeker got up off his seat and pressed his face right up into the camera to show off that infuriating smirk.

He sighed wistfully, "What I wouldn't give to kiss you..."

Megatron's interest perked back up, he smirked, "Really?" he murmured, "What's stopping you?"

Starscream glanced behind him and disappeared from the view screen for a moment as he checked he was definitely alone in the room before bouncing back. He pursed his lips and leant close, optics closed as he made awful smooching noises.

Megatron huffed in amusement at the display, but didn't say anything to stop it, not even when the doors to the communication centre opened to admit two wound up looking seekers. Thundercracker and Skywarp took one look at the view screen their trine leader was currently embarrassing himself with before they snuck in quietly to stand behind Megatron.

Starscream finally stopped, and leant back, "How'd you like that Mega-"

He stopped, optics widened in surprise and utter mortification as he spotted his two trine mates, grinning at him wickedly. He sneered in disgust, opening his mouth to bite first, before his trine did.

He wasn't quick enough.

"What were you doing Screamer?!" Skywarp cried happily, wide grin splitting his face.

Thundercracker shook his helm as if he was disappointed, "Is this what you do with your spare time then?" he asked sternly, servos on his hips in an intimidating stance, "So you have the time to comm. Megatron and make stupid faces at him but me and Skywarp have to assume you're dead for two weeks until you finally get back?"

Starscream's left optics twitched, "...Get out of my life!" he snapped, and then looked sideways to shout even louder, "GET THE FRAG OUT SHOCKWAVE! THIS IS A PRIVATE CONVERSATION!"

"Well Starscream," Megatron said gruffly, climbing up out of the seat he had slumped into and leaning forward, finger hovering over the end comm. button, "As much as I've enjoyed your company-"

Starscream whirled back around to face him, something evil in his expression. "Yes yes," he said nastily, "If only next time we could do a little more talking. As enjoyable and highly comedic as it was to watch you touch yourself into overload at the sound of my dulcet tones, I have actual work to do." he took in Megatron confused and furious expression before glancing at each of his stunned but amused trine mates, "Thundercracker. Skywarp." With a nod of his helm, that was all he said before deactivating the comm. link, leaving Megatron to try and explain himself before Skywarp spread the world around base.

Starscream was fairly certain he'd be in for a unique welcoming back once Megatron finally got his claws into him. The poor slagger wouldn't know whether to frag him through the berth or beat him to a pulp. If Starscream was lucky, he'd do both.

"SHOCKWAVE!" he squawked, spinning around in his chair, "MEGATRON TOLD ME TO TELL YOU TO GET ME A FRAGGING CUBE!"