Welcome to another enstallment of The Random Adventures of Dorothy and Toto.

Many thanks to XJerseyGirl for letting me use her Merry Men First-Aresst Party. If you haven't found her story, As the Worm Turns, READ IT. It's fantastic!

--Bowlingforshrimp

Fourth O' July: Merry Men Style

Aaaah, looking at life through the criss-cross metal bars of the back of a police car…Yup, that's where I was, in the back of a police cruiser. I was in Portland, Oregon, on a job with Ranger and the Merry Men. It had been a drug bust. I was supposed to go up to Josh Well apartment in downtown Portland, wearing a wire, and buy some drugs off him. Tank was with me, and he was supposed to slap the cuffs on Mr. Well right as he was handing over the little bag of cocaine.

Unfortunately, some of the Portland PD were also on a drug bust…the same one. Someone failed to tell them that Rangeman had it covered…and problems ensued.

And now I'm sitting in the back of a black and white SUV, hands cuffed behind my back. Tank is in the other SUV, and I was having a hard time notlaughing. The lady cop who patted Tank down purely enjoyed herself, I could tell. What women wouldn't enjoy running her hands down those muscular legs and over that ripped chest and…ahem. I smiled to myself as the cruiser cruised down Emerson Street. There was a parade of black SUVs behind us, and I guessed we looked like some intense funeral. The police car pulled up to the back of the police department and Tank and I were ushered inside, handcuffed to a bench, and read our rights. Only if you knew Tank as well as I did would you notice he was trying hard to hide a smile.

Normally one would think that getting arrested is embarrassing and demeaning. Not the Merry Men. They throw celebrations, watch the arrest tapes, and laugh their big, meaty heads off. And the first time an employee is arrested on a job, they threw him (or her, in my case) a party. So I was pretty excited. While Tank and I were waiting to be booked, he explained to me that because the majority of Rangeman employees are of the male species, they would take him to a strip club as the celebration. I told him I wouldn't mind if we went to a Chippendale's, but then we decided that only Hector and I would have a good time, so maybe we'd just throw a big party at Rangeman.

The instant after Tank and I got booked Ranger swooped in and demanded to see the chief. Words were exchanged, and everything was sorted out and the whole event was concluded as a misunderstanding. Tank and I were released without bail, and we hopped into an SUV and drove away.

The whole Rangeman parking lot broke into applause when I stepped out of my SUV. I did a couple exaggerated bows, and strutted through the crowd of black cargos and enormous biceps, getting swats on the ass and pats on the head.

Ranger grabbed me and lifted me onto his shoulders, and he carried me up to the roof from there. Some guys brought up beer, ordered food, and even lugged up a box of fireworks.

"Hey, good thing it's Fourth o' July, right?" I said to Ranger. I was still sitting on his shoulders, playing with his silky dark hair.

"So our celebration won't be raided by the cops?" Ranger asked me.

"That and nobody cares if we've got illegal fireworks." I climbed off of Ranger and grabbed myself a bottle of beer.

It was tenpmwhen we'd arrived at Rangeman, and by midnight the party was in full swing. Some of the guys even had women there. When everybody was sufficiently drunk we started to set off fireworks. I lit a Roman Candle and held it up while taking a swig from a bottle of champagne. Ranger and Lester tied three bottle-rockets together and set them off. We lit sparklers and Pickalo-Petes. We lit big sparkly fireworks, ones that went boom and echoed throughout the city, and ones that just made cool designs and showered sparks. There were toasts to Tank and me for our bravery, toasts to me for getting arrested and then released, and toasts to Ranger for getting me arrested.

All in all, it was a pretty fantastic evening. Some of the guys turned in around three, taking their dates with them. But most of us stayed up until the wee hours of the morning and fell asleep right up there on the roof.

I found myself curled up with Ranger in a corner of the roof. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, smiling at the mess of the party they threw for me. There were burnt remnants of firework packages, lighters, matches, a hose, beer bottles, plastic wine glasses, wine bottles, leftover burgers and hot dogs, and paper cups lying everywhere. I crawled across the roof to the house, turned the spigot and drank the nice cold water that spewed out. Then I aimed the house at the piles of Merry Men sprawled on the ground and turned the water on full blast.

From there a huge water-and-paintball-fight took shape. The guys in the control room saw me spraying the poor Merry Men and decided to save their comrades. They brought up paintball guns and water guns.

Hours later, when we were all soaked with water and paint, everyone trudged down to their rooms and apartments to sleep the day away. There was nothing major happening today, so we could all lounge around.

I took a shower in Ranger's apartment, dressed in the bathroom, and flopped down on the bed next to Ranger. He was half asleep, still covered in multicolored paint.

"I like the purple hair," I said drowsily, reaching over to push Ranger's hair off his forehead.

His eyes were closed, but he grabbed my hand and kissed my fingers. "I haven't been to a party like that since college," he mumbled.

"I've never been to a party like that," I said, watching Ranger kiss my fingers. We'd been doing this a lot lately. This flirting. I was only eighteen, so some people may find it weird, but it was all in good fun with Ranger.

"You taste like fun," Ranger mumbled. I had no idea what he was talking about.

"Sure Ranger, and you taste like sleep," I said, laughing.

Ranger smiled and pulled me close to him. "Sleep sounds nice."

"Yeah."

"'Night."

"Ranger, it's three o'clock in the afternoon."

Ranger reached down and pulled the covers over our heads. "Now it's night. Go to sleep."

So I did.

The END!