A/N: I feel as if I haven't updated for ages, but it hasn't really been much longer than usual... blame writer's block and working on the webcom. XD Unfortunately, I'm starting a new job on Monday (though I'm actually very excited and happy about it!) so just a heads up that it's probably going to get worse! D: At least we're at the beginning of the end...
Disclaimer applies, as always.
Chapter Thirteen- Tissue Paper
"Kaoru, what's this?"
"Huh?" Kaoru asked intelligently. He had been back for a few days, but he was still feeling the weariness of jet lag, feeling constantly tired. Particularly when he had just woken up. He didn't bother looking at his mom as he foraged for some breakfast.
"This." She said, putting a large but flat white box down in front of him. "Ellie-chan sent it on with the rest of your things. It looks like a delivery."
"...from London...?" Kaoru read the return address, and through the befuddlement of sleep couldn't think what it was. "I don't think I ordered anything to be delivered..."
Then he remembered. The dress he had bought for Ellie, to be delivered to the house later.
If his mom saw it, she would never drop it. Never.
"Oh, wait! It's... it's... a poster!"
"A poster?" His mom frowned. "It looks more like a dress box."
"I know, I asked them to package it well so it wouldn't crease. Glad it did!"
"Well then, let's see it."
"No! It's for Tono, he'll be upset if I unwrap it."
"Really." His mom clearly didn't believe him.
"Really." Kaoru insisted, picking it up. "I'll just take it upstairs now."
"You do that." She seemed amused. At least she wasn't pushing it, though he somehow got the feeling she would be later. He took the box upstairs and put it on his bed. Why had she sent it? Didn't she like it? Or was this just her way of refusing him, well and truly ending their association? Had the kiss upset her after all?
Then he realised the box hadn't been opened. For a moment he felt quite offended- then realised it was addressed to him. Being Ellie, it wouldn't have occurred to her to open it. He felt a little sad. He'd wanted her to have it. He opened it up himself.
There it was, carefully folded, nestled in layers of pale rose coloured tissue paper. He didn't know what to do with it, it wouldn't fit anyone else he knew, and if he sent it back, what would she think? And what if his mom found out? He tore holes in the tissue paper in frustration. He'd take it in and give it to Haruhi, where she would 'keep it for best'- as if it was meant for anything else- and never wear it. Annoyed, he slammed the lid back down and stowed it under his bed. What a waste.
Hadn't he ordered a dress for Victoria, too? He wondered what she thought of it. At first he thought she would have burnt it, probably mad at him for not saying goodbye, then it occurred to him she would never take it out on clothes. Especially not ones that would look good on her. He sighed. He didn't resent her, but he should never have gone along with it...
"Kaoru." Hikaru said. "Mom wants us to make sure our uniforms still fit. She swears we've grown over the summer, she won't listen when I say we haven't."
"Right." Kaoru agreed, but feeling a stab of surprise. He still hadn't adjusted to being back in Japan; the idea of returning to school tomorrow felt entirely foreign. He supposed it was because he hadn't spent the summer as he normally would and so felt as if he hadn't had one. He wondered then how Ellie was getting on. The English school system was different to Japan's. For one thing, she would be starting a new school year now whereas he wouldn't until April. For another, compulsory education finished at sixteen, when she would have finished school. She had been planning on going on to a sixth form college to get the A-Levels necessary for university, but she had also mentioned with the company going down she might go straight into work. He supposed she would have to now. He hoped she was alright...
"Kaoru?" Hikaru said, with the tone of annoyance that suggested this wasn't the first time he had called. "Stop spacing out and come on already."
"Right, sorry." Kaoru said, going to the wardrobe and taking his school blazer out for the first time in months. They changed silently, backs to one another.
"You done?"
"Yeah."
They turned and examined the uniforms.
"It's fine." Kaoru said.
"I don't know." Hikaru replied, adjusting his cuffs. "There's not much in it, but these sleeves are really going to annoy me."
"What's wrong with them?" Kaoru asked, looking at his sleeves, which finished exactly with his wrist. Then he had a thought, and looked at Hikaru's. He was right when he said there wasn't much in it, but there was definitely some wrist showing.
"Maybe you're taller than me." Kaoru said, more lightly than he felt.
"What? No I'm not. I've never been taller than you."
"Hmm..." Kaoru moved closer and tried to measure with his hand. "No, you're definitely taller. Only by like a centimetre, but..."
"I'm not, okay?" Hikaru snapped, moving away. "It's just how you're doing it, Kaoru.
"...Alright." Kaoru agreed, glad that he at least wasn't the only one unhappy at this physical sign that their closeness might be growing apart. Still, Hikaru had undeniably gotten taller- and he had been in bed for weeks. How much taller would he get now he was well?
Sooner or later everyone was going to be able to tell them apart. That was an interesting thought. He couldn't work out how he felt about it either way, but it was interesting.
They didn't mention it again, and when they went to present themselves to their mother, she didn't mention it either, for once allowing one of her sons to go around in a blazer that was slightly too small.
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Ellie proceeded carefully up the ladder to the attic, clutching onto it with one hand and onto a bulky cardboard box with the other. It really was a pain, trying to do this on her own. She could do with bigger boxes, but if she did she would probably fall down. Luckily, the ceilings of the cottage were reasonably low and after just a few rungs she was close enough to push the box up through the hatch and follow it. Picking the box up again, she moved it over by the rest.
She was putting everything up here for now. It was incredibly difficult, packing her parents away like this, but every shirt she folded and every ornament she wrapped in tissue paper felt like a step in the right direction. She was leaving a lot out, photographs and so on that had decorated the house, things she used too. Everything else she was wrapping up and bringing up to the attic. She needed to sort it all out properly, decide what to keep and what to get rid of, but she wasn't ready to handle that yet. She hadn't cried nearly as much as she thought she would at this task, so she didn't want to ruin things now. Besides, she might need to sell a lot of it to pay the fine she would undoubtedly incur when she told the authorities she'd hidden their deaths...
No use worrying about that now. Still, she was tired, and the stillness of the attic was a good place to think. She sat down on an empty box and thought about the future. She had a place at the local college that she was due to start at on Monday, but she wasn't sure if that was really an option now. She didn't know whether she would be allowed to continue living here on her own, if she'd be able to afford to... The idea of selling the cottage wrenched at her, but she might not have a choice. Besides, her grades were alright- she was a hard worker- but she didn't feel desperate to continue in academia. The problem was, she didn't know what she wanted to do with her life to know if she'd need a university degree to do it.
She could move to Birmingham, of course. Greg had mentioned that there was a spare room in the house he rented with friends. And with the Bullring, surely she could find shop work somewhere, at least until she worked out what she wanted to do. Maybe she'd call him later. But there was more packing to do first. Her mother had owned a lot of clothes. Then there was still paperwork she needed to sort through...
She was about to climb back down when she saw something white and furry and immediately familiar. She ran over to it, to find a small dog on wheels, a handle attached to the back. It was a toy she had as a child, to help her learn to walk or to roll around on. The fur was bobbled and going stiff and hard now, with several suspicious stains, but it still felt like she had last seen it yesterday. She wanted to sit on it for old time's sake, but fearing it would collapse, patted it on the head instead. Behind it were boxes, full of old toys and books and clothes, that she couldn't resist sifting through, losing herself in the memories. Then she found a stack of old notebooks, and opened one at random, near the back.
18th November
Bored.
19th November
Still bored.
20th November
Bored. If they want the abortion rate to go down, they should find more for heavily pregnant women to do. Still, waiting will be worth it- only six weeks to go! I want him/her to be born midnight New Years' eve, but their father won't let me force him/her. Must think of baby names or 'him/her' will stick. Don't want to call her 'Grace' yet, in case she's a he or everyone thinks I'm talking to my myself. Stupid traditions.
21st November
Baby is a born designer (or will be, when he/she is born!). Inspired with new range of baby clothes. Can't reach table due to pregnancy bulge, using bulge instead. Designs would be better if baby would stop kicking!
22nd November
New born bonnets?
23rd November
Sketches almost done today
24th November
Extending range- matching booties. New baby colours- blue pink out green yellow purple PASTELS
25th November
Designs- teddies? Trains? Bunnies- cliché! Cliché sells? Foxes?
Anything with a hat
26th November
Mom's birthday, took flowers to grave. Wish she had been able to hold grandchildren. Will call girl 'Grace Eleanor' like her if daddy agrees.
Clematis in cemetery- use colour combos?
27th November
He wants to call a boy Stuart. I said no. Now saying Steve. Eugh.
28th November
Patrick?
29th November
Pierce- would get all the girls! Until he turned 13
30th November
Eric for a boy. (I wanted to spell it Erik, but apparently that's too 'Phantom'.)
Baby kicking lots today.
1st December
Baby kicking too much to work. Think it wants to come out, but went to nurse and got sent home.
3rd December
Baby did want to come out! Had a daughter 11:58PM 1st December. Not completely healthy but 4 weeks prem. so normal. So cute. She cries when she's put down. We are already calling her Ellie because it suits her. Exhausted but happy.
25th December
Didn't go to in-laws because of baby. Didn't have time to get many presents as we didn't expect her to be here but she was only interested in the fairy lights anyway. Looks shocked every time they come on. It's adorable.
31st December
Ellie couldn't slept c. Fireworks. Settled her down, got her first smile! Cried for an hour!
18th January
Went into office today. Maternity leave seemed so long!
14th February
First valentines' day with baby. Crying interrupted usual VD activity! Will leave with inlaws next year for sure!
19th March
One line a month seems hardly worthwhile. Must catch up when there's time, but snowed under with preparing summer designs. SUMMER FLOWERS theme
21st March
Jake's colours- red, orange, yellow- vibrant
Mel's colours- white, pale yellow, beige- sand, light
DECIDE WHICH SCHEME FOR NEXT WEEK!
26th March
Decided on both.
5th June
Found this under pile of blankets in nursery. Must catch up at the weekend!
Obviously she never did, though, because it ended abruptly there. She had never kept a diary again, getting out of the habit around this time and never picking it back up. Her mother had kept a diary for most of her life, Ellie knew, because most Christmas Eves, after a few glasses, her mom would stagger up and fetch one down, reading out the funniest passages of a twelve and thirteen year old's daily dramas. She never read from the later ones, claiming they usually ended up as little more than jotter pads for her ideas. Looking at this one, Ellie could see what she meant. Still, even though short, sharp phrases made her feel closer to her mother than she had been since she had died. This was how she remembered her mother- always running around busily doing something, living for work and family at once. The two just couldn't be separated for her. Wherever she was, designing had been as natural to breathing to her. Whatever they did and wherever they went as a family would probably give her enough inspiration to have her sketching on the back of napkins or leaflets, and sometimes she would be working on a floral print or sunset colours and suddenly have the irrepressible urge to go hiking or to the botanical gardens. Ellie wanted to live like that too, with passion and love for her life so vast that she could tackle the problems head on. But she wasn't a natural designer like her mother, for her it was a conscious effort to come out with anything, and even when she had the designs had been rejected. She just had to find her own niche, what she really wanted to do, where she wanted to be.
The problem was, she didn't have anything she was that passionate about. She liked making people happy when it was in her power to do so, but what did that come to? She'd like to get married and have children but that wasn't something she could just make happen. She liked singing along badly to The Phantom of the Opera and cooking for Kaoru. Neither of those were exactly career goals. Especially as she wouldn't see Kaoru again.
She didn't let herself dwell on that, instead collecting up the diaries, deciding to read them later, when it was quiet, and finish grieving. After that, maybe someone would borrow them to write a biography. Mom would have liked that, and if this story got to the papers, there might be some interest. Before any of that, however, there was more packing up to do. If she let herself stop, there was no telling when she would be able to force herself to start again.
She was slipping back into old habits, she knew, dealing with this as she dealt with everything- by not thinking about it. Kaoru would shout at her. So too would Greg. And on the subject of not thinking, she needed to think less about the former and more about the latter if she really was going to move forward.
It was time to decide what it was she really wanted.
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"Senpai, let go!"
"But I'm happy to see you, Haruhi! Aren't you happy to see me?"
"Not really."
"Huh?"
"Tamaki, please get out of the corner."
Business as usual, Kaoru thought wryly as he watched Kyouya pointedly ignore Tamaki's protestations that Haruhi was rebelling. It was really as if the summer had never happened. It was the first day back after summer break, and though the clubs were not yet officially in session, they had met up for a planning meeting. Not that they had got much planning done yet, bar Honey dictating an extensive list to Mori about what they should restock the sweet cupboard with. Hikaru, unusually, was sitting back and just watching quietly, not getting involved. Kaoru followed his lead, scratching at the back of his neck worriedly. Something was bothering Hikaru- or was he just trying not to get between Haruhi and Tamaki? Maybe. But someone really should.
"I'm just greeting you after our long summer apart!"
"It wasn't apart! You came over and bugged me all the time!"
"But not every day!"
"Yeah, but it was for whole days at a time. In fact, in terms of hours, you probably saw ten times more of me than if we had been at school."
"..."
"...Senpai?"
"You're right!" Tamaki was aghast. "But that means... now we're back... daddy will hardly see you!" He hugged her again.
"Good!"
If Tamaki had just pulled his usual stunt of retreating to the emo corner at this point, Haruhi would probably have stubbornly ignored him. Instead, he slowly dropped his arms and let go.
"...sorry, Haruhi... I didn't realise I was a nuisance..."
"...you're only a nuisance when you hug me or when you keep interrupting me when I'm working." Haruhi's kind heart won over her stubbornness- and presumably, better judgement. "If you want to come over, just call to make sure I'm not busy first."
"But if you're not, I can come over?"
"...sometimes, I guess."
"Yay! Thank you, Haruhi!" He was clearly spiralling off into some sort of inner mind theatre at this point. Haruhi obviously noticed to, because she added:
"But it's term time right now, so I'll have homework."
"Oh." Tamaki deflated. "Then... I really will barely see you... even at club, we have customers."
"Well, maybe we can go out sometimes at the weekend."
"Really?"
"Sometimes." She emphasised.
"Why, Haruhi." Kyouya seemed amused, though he didn't look up from the laptop. "Are you asking Tamaki out on a date?"
"Ehhhh?" Tamaki screeched. "A date? Is it Haruhi?"
"No!" Haruhi said, annoyed. "I meant all of us!"
"If you want to go on a date," Tamaki said in his best host voice, cupping her chin. "You have only to ask..."
"Senpai..." Haruhi growled.
They were interrupted by the sound of the door slamming shut. Kaoru looked up with a start and noticed Hikaru had gone without him noticing. "Hikaru!" He said, following after.
"...Now look what you did." Haruhi snapped, running after them too. Tamaki moved as if to go too, then stopped and sighed.
"When did the kids get so troublesome, Kaa-san?"
"Hikaru and Kaoru were separated for the whole summer and seem to be finding it hard to get back in synch again. Hikaru left without Kaoru noticing and seems to have outgrown his brother. They had friends and experiences that they didn't share for the first time. I guess you could call this growing pains." Kyouya analysed.
"If that's all it is, then I guess we can't interfere." Tamaki pouted. "But Haruhi's caught up in it too, and sooner or later we could all be involved. Kyouya... if everyone is starting to change, it could be the end of the Host Club as we know it!"
"Not all change is bad, Tamaki." Kyouya answered. "Isn't that why you chose the people you did to be in this club?"
"Kyouya..."
"Not all change is bad." He repeated, firmly closing the lid of his laptop. "Ask Haruhi out."
"I..."
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As the sun was setting on Japan, she completed the long trek up the driveway. This had to be Kaoru's house- he had given her the address weeks ago- but it was huge, a mansion. Still, the journey was nothing compared to the flight from England. She smiled, knowing it was now affirmed that she had made the right decision. This, then, was what she wanted.
There was a fountain, the water droplets turning gold in the dimming sunlight. She stooped over it to check her reflection. She fluffed her hair a little, batted her eyes to check the lashes, pulled her dress down a little. He had certainly chosen one that suited her. Knowing she looked as good as she ever had in her life gave her confidence, and she mounted the steps, ringing the bell and waiting.
"Yes?" A butler asked, opening the door.
"Hi." She smiled her best, most dazzling smile, and repeated the explanation she'd used to get through the gate. "I'm here to see Kaoru. I came all the way from England."
"I see. And is he expecting you?"
"No, it's a surprise."
"I'm afraid I can't let people in unless the family is expecting or knows them."
"But he does know me! I'm his girlfriend!"
"I'm sorry, miss. If you leave a contact number, I will try to arrange an appointment."
"I don't need an appointment! I'm his girlfriend, he invited me here, and no penguin-suited bell boy is going to stop me! Let me-" She drew up short as she saw him coming downstairs, looking at her in puzzlement. He was still wearing his school uniform, she noticed, and he wore it well. She never could resist a man in a suit. "Kaoru!" She shouted excitedly, shoving past the butler and throwing her arms around him, kissing him enthusiastically. She could feel his surprise in the way he didn't seem to know whether to respond or not. She moved closer, stretching up to deepen the kiss and give him the answer, but he pulled away first.
"...Victoria?" He said, slowly, looking at her up and down. She was wearing the dress he had bought for her and she could tell he appreciated it. She gave a little twirl.
"Surprise!" She said delightedly, posing elegantly. "I just had to come and show you. Do you like it...?" She caressed his cheek.
"Sure." He said, catching her hand and clamping it in his own. "Get upstairs."
"Kaoru!" She laughed in mock indignation. "Don't be vulgar!"
"Who's being vulgar?" He returned, still holding her hand as he dragged her upstairs and down a hallway.
"Kaoru!" She protested, suddenly alarmed. He was being quite rough. "I... I don't want to do this now! It's too soon! Not like this!"
"Shut up and get in." He answered, pulling open one of the doors and shoving her inside. She stumbled forward, stopping herself from falling by grabbing it. Kaoru was sitting on it and looked at her in surprise.
"Vicky?"
"Kaoru?" She yelped. "But... you..." She looked between them. Kaoru at the door, Kaoru on the sofa...
"Present for you." Said the Kaoru at the door, which she suddenly realised must be Hikaru. He sounded annoyed. "She's all warmed up, so enjoy." With that, he left.
"...Vicky? What are you doing here?"
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The queues had seemed never-ending that day, with people coming in to report all sorts of rubbish, everything from biscuits being stolen at a rail station to help finding a pair of glasses that had been lost in a nearby field. This was not real police work. As such, the officer on duty at the desk hadn't paid Ellie much heed at first.
"Can I help you?"
"Probably. My parents died."
"I'm sorry to hear that, but you don't need us. You need the obituary service."
"I'm sorry, but I think I probably need to speak to you." Ellie persevered. "I'm sure I probably broke a law somewhere..."
"Why? Did you kill them?" The officer dead-panned.
"It's just that they died two years ago. I've been covering it up since."
"...what?"
"I'm sorry! I'm sure it's fraud, but I just didn't want to end up in care and I paid all the taxes they would have had to and I even opted out of getting child benefit for myself so-"
"Calm down." The officer lifted a hand to stem the flow. "Is all this true?"
"Yes..."
"And you think you've probably broken the law?"
"Yes."
"Then why are you here? If all criminals just turned themselves in most of the police could just quit their jobs."
"Because I'm trying to move on." Ellie answered. "Which means I have to deal with this first."
The officer was bewildered. He didn't know what he should do with her. Yes, she had knowingly covered up a death, which was technically fraud, but she was just a kid...
"I think you'd better come with me." He said, leading her down to one of the interview rooms where someone else could figure it out.
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A/N: Oh me oh my, is Victoria causing trouble again? Tut tut. Tune in next time for more on that ;) It was nice getting to write a little bit of Tamaki and Kyouya and the others in this chapter; expect more of that, too. :) Thanks for reading!