Chapter 13: To Love is to Destroy
He knocked on my door with me still against it. I tangled my hands in my hair, the clock blinked 12:13am. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, Manuel." I said through the door. "Please talk to me now. I'm sorry if I was going too fast." He said. I hear his body thump my door and I know he's sitting against the door like me. "I'm going to stay here until you talk to me." He stated after I didn't answer. "I promise I'll talk to you later. I'm just so stressed out right now." I said pulling my hair. "I can fix that." He whispered through the door, sadness in his voice. Tears ran down my face at that. Was I destroying him by doing this? "Goodnight." I said. I heard him get up and shut his door. Izzy softly knocked on my door. "Can I come in?" She asked. I stood up, unlocked the door, and let her in. She changed into a t-shirt and pajama shorts. "What's wrong?" She asked as I shut the door. I put my arms around her, hugging her. "It's just this stupid saying I've lived by my whole life. It's tearing me apart." I said sitting on the side of my bed and wiped under my eyes. "It's ok. We can talk about this tomorrow, go get cleaned up. Ok?" I nodded. "Goodnight." She said and quietly shut my door. I took a shower and changed into my pajamas and lied on my bed. I immediately drifted off to a dreamless sleep.
I woke up at 5:30am. Everybody should be awake by now. I brushed my insane bedhead, it looked like I fuckin got shocked by lightning. I changed into my leather pants and black tank top. I walked into the hallway, and notice two people making out on Alec's door. As I got closer, I noticed it was Alec and a really colourful, spikey, sparkly, glittery guy. I just walked past them, no big deal. They didn't even notice me, so that's one less awkward moment I have to deal with today. I went into the kitchen and found everybody there at a big table. I sat in an empty chair between Izzy and Clary, who were drinking coffee. I took out my phone and saw a new message. I opened it. 'I know where you are, Kristina.-Dad'. "What the Hell!?" I said and stood up. "Izzy, wheres my mom?" I tried not to panic. "She left with Luke to do something for the Clave. Why?" I hesitated, then showed her my phone. "By the Angel." She whispered. Manuel came and looked at the message. "We should talk to Magnus." He stated. "Who the fuck is Magnus?" I asked. "Did someone call me?" The sparkly guy asked. His lips slightly swollen from making out. He walked through the door and approached us. Manuel took my phone and showed it to Magnus.
He took my phone and shrugged, "What?" "I never met my father. I need to find my mom, now." I said and ran to get my weapons. I hear Manuel running after me. He grabs my arms and pushes my back to the wall. "Calm down! What's wrong!" He yelled. I squirmed, but his grip got tighter. To love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be destroyed.The voice in my head spoke. Jace barges out of his room. "Who said that?!" Did I say that out loud? "Who told you that?" Manuel asked, shock evident on his face. "My father said that to my mother before he walked out the door." I said and stopped squirming. "Who's your father?" Jace asked. "I don't know! That's the problem!" "CLARY! IZZY!" They came running towards us. "Calm her down!" I heard someone yell. There's too many people around me. I screamed and they all hit the floor covering their ears. I ran. Ran like I never ran before.