"Do you think it's a little weird they just left the three of us alone?" Castle was saying to his fiancée as she came over to the kitchen where they were both taking care of dinner that evening.

"I think they really had other plans for dinner Castle," Beckett said, shaking her head as she picked up the colander with strawberries and poured them into a bowl. "You know they wouldn't make plans for us having dinner with them tomorrow night if they weren't serious about tonight."

"True," he said slowly. "What's she doing?" Castle then asked as he finished the last omelet he'd made for them.

"At her barre, practicing for Monday already," Beckett said, helping him take everything to the coffee table.

"I'll go get her," Castle said as Beckett grabbed the last thing they needed from the kitchen counter. He went over to their daughter's room, seeing that at some point Julia must have stopped practicing ballet and was instead practicing the Foxtrot. "You'll be pretty even with the other kids I think," he said, getting her attention as she made a mistake and began to start over.

"Think so?" Julia asked.

"I do. You've got to be hungry after all the practicing you did," Castle said as he went into the room and picked her up, swinging out her legs to her cry of joy. "Let's eat."

"Have fun sweetie?" Beckett asked as she saw the two come into the living room. She smiled as Julia was set down by Castle and ran over to her.

"I practiced a little, I stopped 'cause I got tired," Julia replied to her mother's question as she picked up her fork. She smiled as Castle sat next to them on the blanket laid on the clear space on the floor. "I wish we were outside," she said.

"This is still pretty good, not every little girl is going to have a picnic for dinner," Castle pointed out as she ate a little of her omelet.

"Yeah, thank you for letting me have it," Julia said, taking the glass her mother handed her.

"It was a good idea," Beckett said. "But please be careful."

"I don't think you need to worry about her Kate," Castle said, watching them. "She's probably the neatest kid I know. And yes," he said as Julia opened her mouth to speak. "I'll include Alexis in there."

"Wasn't I messy when I was a baby?" Julia asked her mother, looking up at her.

"Of course, babies usually are," Beckett said.

"That's more because you're not really sure what's going on with that food you're being served," Castle commented, watching his fiancée and wondering why she had answered the question so easily. He made a note mentally to ask her later about that, and said to Julia, "I remember the faces Alexis would make when I fed her, she was very confused. Especially with the peas, never liked those when she was a baby."

"Usually they don't," Beckett said, kissing Julia's forehead. They ate in silence for a little longer, and she noticed that their daughter was a little more quiet than normal, and she asked, "What's wrong sweetie?"

"Does Alexis still have her mommy?" Julia said in hesitation, not looking at Castle.

"She's in Paris right now," Castle said simply.

"Oh, but…" Julia started to say, looking a little perplexed.

"He and Alexis' mother got a divorce, a long time ago when she was three," Beckett explained; since she and Castle had agreed on telling Julia that knowing it would likely come up at one point.

"And then you met my mommy?" Julia asked.

"I had another divorce before I met her," Castle explained.

"Oh," Julia repeated, looking a little unhappy at that.

"But you know, the reason for that was mainly because they were not like your mom. Nowhere near like her, and I didn't know that that was the kind of woman I wanted to be with," Castle said. "So I know your friend Jessica's parents got divorced, but that doesn't mean that I will be going through that a third time sweetheart. And I have more reasons than I ever did the last two times to make sure this marriage will work," he said, glancing at his fiancée because that was something he'd never told her; but had wanted to.

Beckett glanced down at their daughter, a little taken aback by his words, but knowing from his tone that he was serious. "He's right," she said as she realized Julia was looking at her questioningly. "We want to be together for a long time and make sure we stay a family for that long too."

"Good," Julia said seriously and with a firm nod, earning her smiles from them. "Can we listen to music after dinner?"

"You want to play a game while we do?" Castle asked.

"Yeah, but I want to get music for your wedding," Julia said in a matter of fact tone. "It's okay right?" she said, suddenly looking doubtful of herself.

"We trust you sweetie," Beckett said. "Finishing eating though okay?" She kissed Julia's forehead when she nodded and glanced at Castle, seeing the look in his eyes as he watched them. It reminded her to have her conversation with him later, but for the time being she turned her attention back to their daughter, as she eagerly told them about the songs she had thought of for them already.

"Mommy, can I ask you a question?" Julia said as she waited for her mother to sit behind her to brush her hair.

"You can," Beckett said as she took out the braid that she'd put in the little girl's reddish brown hair that morning.

"What… what do you feel like when you love someone like you love Castle?" Julia hesitatingly queried.

"Oh, I think I should go, that sounds like a mother-daughter question," he said as he'd come to the doorway right as she'd asked

"No, I think it applies to us both," Beckett said, gesturing him inside. "Well, it's a little hard to answer that exactly. Love is a little unexplainable, that's why so many people write songs about it."

"But they say different things," Julia protested.

"I know, but it's different for each person. What you feel for one person isn't going to be the same for another," Beckett said. "That's what dates are for, to see if you feel something for the person you're with." She let Castle take Julia's brush back to her dresser and let the little girl climb onto her lap. "But let me try again. You know there are different kinds of love."

"Yeah, how mommies and daddies love their kids," Julia said with a nod. "And then how mommies and daddies love each other. That one I wanna know about."

"You're not dating someone at school are you?" Castle asked as he sat on the edge of the bed in front of them.

"Ew, no, I don't wanna," Julia said, wrinkling her nose.

"Okay, to explain quickly sweetie since it's past your bedtime; you feel excited when you're with the person you love, or you'll be protected if you need to be, you feel safe. But one important thing is you can't stop thinking about them. You want to be with them, and share your life with them," Beckett said, not realizing her tone of voice had gotten tenderer as she'd gone on, though Castle and Julia did.

"You want to be with them forever and ever," Julia stated.

"Your mom's right, if you really love someone; you can't really face the idea of not being with them; it hurts to even consider it," Castle said. "And like she said, you're incredibly happy to be with them."

"It sounds like it's nice," Julia said.

"It is, and I am so glad you said you were too little," Beckett said, tearing her gaze away from her fiancé to tickle their daughter and kiss her cheek. "Okay, I think that was a pretty good explanation, so it's time for bed sweetie."

"Kay, thank you for letting me get more songs," Julia said as she was handed over to Castle.

"I didn't think you'd want to go through all The Beatles' albums, but I expected you'd want to listen through every last song Paul and George have," he said as the little girl giggled. "But you have a pretty nice list so far."

"Are you gonna tell Alexis about your song?" Julia asked eagerly, not letting go of his neck when he set her on her bed.

"When we talk to her tomorrow," Castle promised as he hugged her. "Come on, into bed with you," he said, using a slight British accent. When she finally let go of him he shared a kiss with her and then kissed her forehead. "Goodnight Julia, I love you."

Nodding, Julia hugged her mother when she went to her and said, "Night Mommy, I love you."

"I love you sweetie, sweet dreams," Beckett said, sharing a kiss with her before she tucked her in. She and Castle waited in the doorway for Julia to fall asleep as they usually did, but that time she took his wrist to lead him away from the closed door. "We need to talk," she said simply when they were in the living room.

"I know," Castle said simply, not surprised in the slightest. "Just… let me make some coffee."

When he went to the kitchen at her nod of agreement, Beckett sat on the couch, picking up the list on the coffee table that Julia had started as they'd played The Beatles Monopoly that Castle had bought for their daughter the month before. "I'm not sure about some of these songs," she said, wanting to ease her fiancé into their conversation and make sure he was relaxed.

"I don't know, they're pretty romantic," Castle said, finishing the first cup and getting the second started.

"I've Got My Mind Set On You? That's mouthful to say, and a little…" Beckett began.

"Well, I'm not sure about the money lyric, but you want every dance to be slow?" Castle asked.

"No, but we'll talk about that another time," Beckett said as he walked over to her then. She took the mug he was holding out to her, and she said, "Are you okay?"

"Not really," Castle said with a sigh as he didn't want to lie to her. "I'm exhausted, and really don't want to sleep again."

"Okay," Beckett said with a nod. "But there's something else I'm worried about."

"What?" Castle asked in surprise.

"If I told you I wanted you, right this second, what would you say?" Beckett asked him. She saw the slight hesitation and nodded saying, "That's how I was after Queens, but I'm a little confused what exactly your concern is."

"I'm afraid of doing what he would have if he'd had the chance," Castle said.

"You do realize that he would have raped me," Beckett said, putting her hand on his arm. "And I honestly don't think he would have managed it."

"No but… since Queens I've had a fear that I would go too far when we were intimate, that I would hurt you," Castle said, hesitating to get the right words to explain.

"And yet you haven't," Beckett pointed out. She set down her coffee and took his mug to put it on the table too, turning back to him to take his hands in hers. "I don't know how I looked when you found me Castle, but I am alive, I am here."

Looking down at their tightly clasped hands, he nodded, and then pulled her into his arms, making her sit on his lap. "I know you are, but I can't stop asking myself what if this happens again?" Castle said. He heard Beckett inhale quickly before she spoke, but he was quick to stop her saying, "It's a question that can't be answered I know. It's why I said what I did when we talked to Julia, and I ended up realizing that since I can't answer the question, I need to make sure I don't let it stop me from enjoying my life with you Kate; with you and Julia."

Pulling away enough to look at him, Beckett cupped his face in her hands and said, "You and I are both in agreement then. And I'm glad that you decided that because when I said I wanted you; I wasn't kidding."

Shuddering at that; though he'd already had the suspicion that she was feeling that way; Castle closed the gap between them and kissed her, wanting her badly as well, but for some reason there was still that image of her laying on the block of ice; looking as if she was dead; that was making him hesitate. He kissed her harder, hoping that would help get rid of it as she slid her fingers over the back of his head to hold him tight to her as their tongues met in his mouth.

While Castle and Beckett were talking, Julia suddenly woke up, unsure what time it was. She looked around her groggily, seeing her Stitch doll was laying next to her. She yawned, and realized her mouth was dry and knew then that was the reason she'd woken up. She got of her bed, and padded to the door, opening it slowly. Not hearing anything, she guessed her mother and Castle were in bed, so she went to the door to the living room, stifling a gasp as she saw they were in a heavy kiss. She blushed at catching them, but needed water badly. So she decided to chance it, and crept out, ducking behind an armchair before tiptoeing to the kitchen. But before she got to the chairs in front of the counter, there was a surprised; "Julia!" and she froze in place, trying not to move.

"Sweetie, are you thirsty?" Beckett asked as she walked over. She smiled when Julia just looked up at her with wide eyes and she picked the little girl up, kissing her cheek saying, "You should have called us so you wouldn't have to get out of bed."

"Sorry," Julia said as she took the glass of water that Castle brought to her. She took a few sips as Beckett carried her to her room and said, "I thought you went to bed too 'cause it was quiet."

"We will after we get you tucked back in," Beckett said, not looking at Castle. She handed him the glass before she got Julia into bed, and they kissed her goodnight before leaving; their daughter falling asleep quickly that time; and she watched as he went down to the hall to her room. "Castle," she said simply to make him stop.

"Sorry," he said quickly as she walked up to him.

Studying the expression on his face, Beckett took his hand and pulled him to her room saying, "You were close to bringing me here before you noticed her weren't you?"

"It's been a long time since I've had to shift from being a lover to a parent in only seconds," Castle explained. "But, since she's set for the night; I'm hoping; come here."

Beckett shook her head, as that wasn't really a command, but left enough room for her to protest. She watched him lock the door behind them before he turned to her, grabbing her around the waist. She was a little surprised when he didn't kiss her, instead just held her to him. "Okay?" she asked as his hands started to run up and down her back.

"Let me…" Castle started to say before he trailed off. He then said firmly, "Let me just feel you Kate."

Though she had a feeling that was what he'd wanted, Beckett pulled back and looked into his eyes, cupping his cheeks saying, "You will Castle, you will."

Leaning down at the tone of her voice, he kissed her then, and felt her arms wrap around his neck as he laid his hands flush on her back. Castle pulled her against him, feeling their bodies meet and he groaned in slight frustration at the clothing that was shielding them completely from one another. He let that kiss go on for a while, crazily devouring her lips as she was crying out against him before she pulled away. He couldn't stop himself, going to her neck, sucking at her racing pulse before she made him pull away from her.

"Hurry," Beckett said, suddenly impatient. She helped him with her clothes, not surprised when he wouldn't stop touching her, running his hands over her bare skin as more and more of it was revealed to him, but each touch set her literally on fire and by the time they'd finished casting off his clothing, she wasn't sure how she wasn't going crazy.

Following her onto the bed, Castle kissed her before her head could go back on the pillow bellow her. But he kept it quick, only pulling back to breathe so he could speak. He had been planning to ask her a question, but looking at her, he realized he didn't need to, and looking over her body said, "I love you."

Not surprised by that, or his tone which seemed to include that he was relieved she was okay, Beckett cupped his cheek and as he pressed a single kiss to her palm she whispered, "I love you too Castle." She looked on as he went to her pendant, kissing the hollow of her throat that it was resting on. Trembling slightly as his kisses continued on down to her breasts, she wasn't too amazed when he only brushed his lips against her there. She knew he still wanted to feel her, wanted to reassure himself and move on from what happened, so she stroked the back of his head as he descended further. She bit her lower lip as he reached the junction of her legs, a little surprised when he pulled away before he could do anything there. "You-" she said as he helped her to sit up suddenly.

Kissing the back of her left shoulder to stop her, Castle almost forgot why he'd had her do that. But he felt the end of her braid brush against his cheek, so he reached up and pulled off the band holding it. Very carefully, he loosened the strands of the braid, and as soon as her hair was loose, he buried his nose into her locks murmuring that he loved her though he knew she wouldn't be able to hear him.

Though she couldn't hear what he was saying exactly, Beckett could understand the sentiment easily, and she felt her body reacting in more ways than one. Her heart was beating frantically, she was desperately aroused and throbbing, and every inch of her skin felt hyper-sensitive. So much so that when he flicked his tongue out to her shoulder he'd kissed, she had to wonder why she wasn't screaming her reaction as it was like a sharp bolt of electricity that rushed through her from head to toe. At that point Castle was kissing her, then brushing his tongue after, with her knowing he was tasting her. Her breathing became a pant very easily, as she knew he was doing that because; as he'd said earlier; he wanted to feel her.

Castle was by no means unaffected by his ministrations over his fiancée's back, and he wondered why he wasn't just throwing her down to the bed to take her until she begged him to stop. But that was where he realized he was very much different from men like the killer; they took without consent and he didn't want anything but her consent. He wanted her to need him as much as he needed her. And with that he moved to press up close behind her. "Tell me what you want," he whispered to her before she turned her head to him, kissing him deeply.

"The same thing that you do," Beckett whispered against his lips when they had parted to breathe. "To feel you," she said as she moved his hand that was wrapped around her stomach to the junction of her legs.

Pulling away as he repressed a shudder of pleasure at her words, Castle quickly laid Beckett on her back, not too surprised when he lay on top of her that their hips met. He kissed her hard and fast once before he moved back to watch her as they coupled together then, very slowly.

Biting at her lower lip hard, Beckett wrapped her arms around Castle tightly as he remained stationary once he was inside of her. She responded to his kiss easily as he coaxed her tongue into a short fight before they lost the urge and instead rolled around one another. They parted and she couldn't hold back the gasp that escaped her parted lips as he proceeded to move. As she'd thought would happen, he was very slow and deliberate, when he was close enough she felt him trying to press against the apex of her legs, making her squeeze her eyes shut tightly in pleasure at the sensation. She pulled him down to her and their foreheads pressed together tightly as they let their breath mix between them. She had proceeded to move shortly after she could feel his rhythm, and easily sensed him faltering for a brief moment before he kissed her. If he hadn't done that, she would have smiled as she knew that kiss was for him to get back to his pace.

Feeling himself back in control, Castle moved to her neck, brushing his lips against both sides before he went down to her breasts. He felt her shiver as his hand came up to cup her left mound, his breath heavy against her nipple. He kissed around it gently, carefully, before he felt her fingers sliding through his hair until her nails raked over his scalp. He was spurred on to suckle at it, using his hand to stimulate her other breast in the meantime. They were still moving together, and he groaned as she moved her legs from having been wrapped around his legs to sliding high up his sides. He found himself moving deeper inside her, hearing her slight cry in response the first time he did that. He moved to her other breast, spending as much time as he felt he needed to there. Finally he made himself pull away, and he went to her lips, kissing her gently before she took the initiative and kissed him harder.

Beckoning his tongue into her mouth and gently curling hers around it once he was there, Beckett could feel his hand on her side, running up and down her slowly. She moaned into his mouth, knowing that was him feeling her yet again, and she ran her nails over his back in response, trying to feel him too. She shivered for a moment as he pulled away, nipping at her lower lip. She forced her eyes open then, to find him staring intently at her, and she reached up to his lower lip, running her thumb very slowly along it until he caught it between his teeth, setting her heart racing at the highly intense expression on his face.

Castle reached up and held her hand with his own as he slid his lips along her palm, feeling her hand trembling underneath him. He looked back to her, watching her as he went down to her wrist. There he nipped at her skin, feeling her jump slightly in response before he soothed the gentle bite with his lips and tongue. He had to control her a little then, as she suddenly started to arch her back and try to thrust harder against his hips. He held the side of her right hip, helping her back into the pace he'd set, and he decided they needed a slight distraction, since he knew she was also likely close. So he slowed down until stopping, watching as his fiancée's chest moved up and down with her breath. He moved then, sitting up on the bed with her straddling his lap as he pulled her down to his lips for a kiss at the same time. He wasn't too surprised when she started to move, and he let her, as the shock from him stopping was a little too much.

Stroking the back of his head as they moved together, Beckett found she had the chance to do things a little differently. She rolled her hips against him, watching with him as they both looked down at their joined bodies. But she wasn't sure if he could see much more than her, not that it mattered, they could still feel one another. She felt his hands on the small of her back, squeezing a little tightly, and she brushed her lips against him as she squeezed her thighs tighter around him suddenly. Leaning against him, she kept her lips close to him, so they brushed together as she whispered, "Now you can feel me."

Shuddering as her voice was husky at that point, Castle moved to kiss her, letting his hands roam her back before he grasped her ass gently. Her moan bursting into his mouth and sudden jerk made him speed up though he hadn't wanted to do that. He calmed himself down by returning his hands to the small of her back, and he pulled away to watch her, before it became too much and he moved her again.

Feeling her back on the cool sheets again, Beckett wrapped her legs around him tightly, as he leaned his head down enough to press kisses over her breasts. She moaned slightly, arching her back enough so he would have better access to them, not surprised as he hungrily took her left nipple into his mouth. Closing her eyes tightly as he proceeded to suckle at her, she ran her hand over the back of his head, biting on her lower lip a little hard before she slid her right leg further up his side. She nearly had it underneath his arm, before he raised his head and ran his hand down the side of her thigh.

Pulling away from her completely, Castle wasn't too surprised by the sound of protest that his fiancée made, but he didn't stop. Running his palm along her skin had been too much, and he needed more than just a simple touch. He pressed his lips along her leg, before he decided not to waste more time, sliding it down until he reached her foot. He heard her writhing a little as he let his tongue out a little, rubbing it against her skin. When he did the same to her toes, he expected the short cries that kept escaping her mouth, and hurried to do the same to her other foot before he allowed himself to travel back up her body as he'd gone down it. When he was even with her face, he saw her panting, and realized she was holding herself rigid, making him a little concerned. "Okay?" he asked.

Not responding, Beckett sat up and wrapped her arms around him tightly as she kissed him hard. She was pleased when he responded quickly, matching her ardor as he laid her back on the bed. A little startled when he pulled apart from her, she watched as he brought her right leg in between them, looking at her. She quickly wrapped her other leg around his waist as she knew that look was to see if it was alright to continue, and she was tense again. But that time it was because he was sliding inside of her, and with her leg pressed up against his chest, he was at a different angle, and deeper than before. She was breathing hard, and arched her back as he proceeded to move, making her moan out something she had no idea what it was. When he glanced down at her, she reached up to cup his face with her hand, trembling at his lips that brushed along her skin instantly. "Castle…" she whispered, feeling their hips rolling together for an instant in their thrusts, before they were starting again. Going from the bottom of their hips up to their waists, she bit her lower lip when he moved his hand to them, stroking in time as they moved.

Taking Beckett's leg and wrapping it around his side, Castle was reminded why neither of them were the biggest admirers of the positions that kept them at a distance from each other as he kissed her hungrily. Her lips were trying to devour his at the same time, and they groaned together as they were almost fighting each other, trying to be the more dominant one; as would sometimes happen. But eventually she allowed him to take over, but only briefly before he was giving her the impetus to lead him. He was nearly tearing himself away from her mouth to give himself the air he desperately needed, and he was breathing roughly against her lips. "You… you're too much Kate," he whispered as he went to her ear, nibbling at it gently before he grunted at her nails digging a little into his back. "And I want a lot more," he said as he moved back to look at her, and once he could, reached up to brush his fingers along her pendant as they stared at one another.

Her heart was pounding, and it seemed like her body was not going to stop aching, but Beckett didn't want it to end. She slid her hand up to the back of Castle's head, and then drew him to her lips for a chaste kiss that was a little of a shock to their still swollen lips from before. She then guided him easily to her breasts, stroking the back of his head as he was careful to take them gently, tenderly. It all seemed to rush over her at once, and she was suddenly struck absolutely still for an intense second before the pleasure centered where he was joined with her washed over her skin, over her blood, over every inch of her until she would wonder if she had passed out for a short time at the intensity of that orgasm after her short but concentrated cry of his name. But if she had, she was brought back to consciousness in time to feel Castle pressing against her tightly, groaning her name repeatedly against her neck until they were calming down together, at nearly the same time.

For a long time the room was quiet after having the sounds of their lovemaking pressing against the walls and echoing into the corners. The two were able to eventually recover, and soon after they were lying on their backs, Castle's arm underneath his fiancée's neck, their right hands joined together as he held up her left hand. They were silent for a while as they watched the lights, still on in the room, dancing over the diamonds in Beckett's ring as he turned her hand back and forth slowly.

"We keep doing that, I really think it will take care of those nightmares," Castle commented.

"Hmm, I don't think they take care of those," Beckett said, shaking her head before he set her left hand down on his chest. "But tell me what you saw last night, you never did."

"It was basically you on the ice, but he was climbing onto you. It went kind of dark there, which is really great, because the sounds I heard…" Castle said, squeezing his eyes together tightly in remembrance. He felt Beckett's hand on his cheek and reached up to take it, squeezing it tightly before he turned his head to kiss her temple. "But I woke up and you were with me, asleep but you could move," he said as he remembered.

"And now you know I'm here still with you Castle," Beckett said as she entwined their fingers together as they watched. "You definitely felt me tonight."

"I did," Castle said. "Don't hit me, but the sounds in my nightmare were you screaming in pain and I… really enjoyed hearing you screaming tonight because you wanted me," looking at her to see if she was angry.

Quiet at that, Beckett then looked at him and smiled saying, "Keep that sound in your mind and your dreams might be a lot better."

"Whew, if that happened I wonder if I'd want to wake up," Castle said.

"I don't know," Beckett said, turning to him and laying half on his chest. "I think that reality would be a lot better than dreams," she then dropped into a whisper as she leaned down and kissed him sensuously but briefly.

The two soon became lost in one another, and made love again, though they were a little rougher that time. So much so that when they calmed down fully, they were still covered in a thin sheen of sweat as they pressed close together. The room was silent again, until Castle broke the sounds of the city outside that faintly made their way to them.

"I was tempted," he stated simply, trying to see if she would want to hear.

"Tempted to do what?" Beckett asked him, looking at him.

"To take you, Julia and our parents to San Francisco, have Alexis pick us up and drive to City Hall," Castle said, watching her closely to see what she would say.

"I would have been fine with that if you suggested it," Beckett said seriously.

"I had that same thought when we were in the crash; that I was going to lose the chance to spend the rest of my life with you. And I didn't want to face it for a second time," Castle explained. "I'm tired of being worried we're not going to make it to that point, so I would have said let's get married and damn the consequences. But, I don't want a quick ceremony with you; it needs to be something we plan out together and something Julia and Alexis can be involved with too; and my mom and your dad."

"I'm touched you want to wait," Beckett said, wondering in the back of her mind if he was also trying to delay a little more.

"The election is pretty much right around the corner. I'm sure Gates will request her help in kicking me out if she's elected, so we'll be able to get married then," Castle said.

They were both quiet before Beckett asked, "Would you ask me to walk away?"

"No," Castle said, knowing already what she was talking about without her being specific. "Do you really think I could ask you that?"

"You've seen me nearly dead before this Castle; it never came to your mind to tell me to choose between my job and you?" Beckett said.

"I have no right to ask," he said firmly as he turned a little to lie on his side and wrap his arms around her. "You were with the NYPD before I met you, a long time before that, so it's a question I would never voice." He studied her then, and asked, "Have you thought about that?"

"I was thinking about what you said about thinking you'd lost me," Beckett said, not looking at him. "And this case, how it took me from Julia when I should have really been there for her."

Castle was quiet for a minute and said, "You keep considering it."

"I know, but I'm back and forth whether I'm serious or joking when I do that," Beckett said. "I was really serious after realizing that my daughter nearly lost me yet again." She sighed as Castle hugged her closer to him and said, "But I'll be going back on Monday, and for the time being I'm not considering resigning."

Not saying anything to that, Castle kissed her gently before he pulled back and looked at her seriously before saying, "It's up to you and only you Kate, but I know whatever you decide, it will be for the right reason."

Smiling a little at that, Beckett kissed his jaw back up towards his ear before he spoke, making her look back at him. She let her smile grow a little wider and said, "I'm tired of being a victim Castle," since he'd asked if she was okay. "And I know every time I let myself remember, I lose my ability to keep going and concentrate on what's more important to me; who's important to me."

"Hopefully I'm one of those people," Castle said. He couldn't help laugh slightly at the nudge into his side from her elbow, and he grabbed her, pulling her close for a tender kiss before she lay on top of his chest, his hand stroking her hair gently as she stroked his lower lip slowly with the tips of her fingers.

Beckett suddenly got up and got out of bed after they'd been looking at each other for a while, grabbing her pajamas and his, tossing his in his face as he was sitting up. She smiled at his splutter of surprise and said, "We should get dressed."

"No need to," Castle said, though he was already getting dressed. "The door is locked."

"I know, but I don't want to run around trying to get dressed before she worries about us if she tries to come in," Beckett said, tossing her hair over her shoulder as she walked to the bed. She was a little surprised when Castle suddenly grabbed her, pulling her onto the bed before he kissed her as soon as she was sitting on his lap. Her little gasp disappeared into his mouth, and she could almost feel his joy in that kiss. She kissed him back, but gently slid her tongue into his mouth before they were parting. "We have tomorrow," she said, wanting to remind him of that in case his mind would go back to the night before.

"We do," Castle said, letting her then make him lay down before he got on his side behind her, holding her close.

Turning her head back to him, Beckett kissed him gently, pleased when he responded in kind. When they stopped, she squeezed his hand that was on her abdomen, and closed her eyes, letting herself drift off to see what her dreams would develop into; not the least bit ashamed that she was hoping a little desperately for a repeat of that night she and her fiancé had spent occupied alone.

Pulling Beckett close against him when he felt her relax, Castle pressed his lips to the side of her head a few times before putting his head on his pillow to let her sleep. He was thinking about what she had said, and the knowledge that they did have tomorrow, made his worry over losing her ease slightly, which was a relief. He felt a sudden surge of love for her, remembering her touch that night. She had been calming him as they'd been together, reminding him that they were together. He kissed the side of her head one last time, and held her firmly as he closed his eyes finally. His last thought before he sank into the easy darkness of sleep was that he would do whatever it took to make sure that she was by his side; always.