It was hard to be ignorant.

Life is comparable to a fisherman at sea. In storms he desperately cling to his battered boat, gasping for air, rooted to reality only by the feeling of the wet hull under his fingertips. The water seemed like it could swallow him whole, and surely it would not hold back.

He closed his eyes.

Soon enough his small old boat was grasped in a choking hold by none other than watery hands he wished to ignore. After he had been pulled under the waves of truth, he discovered a feeling of pure peace. Heavy murky water splashed over his once flailing body and pushes him further and further down, so much that the weight of it all had paralyzed him.

Swallowing when he did not wish to.

Water filled his lungs. He stopped struggling. It was useless.

A smile appeared on his face as he felt the bubbles escape his cold, limp lips. It's useless.

Death would always wait for him since the first day he dipped his foot into the ocean. Ignorance was truly hard when his own two eyes watched the dancing white waves regress farther from his reach.

Deeper and deeper he went into realization, he felt himself fading but felt peace. Contentment in death, and it ended.

Eren Jaeger woke up drenched in sweat, breathing slightly faster than normal. The dark bedroom was not familiar… oh right, he had been staying at his friend, Armin's house. Two wrongs don't make a right but he was hoping that two loners could be blessed by each other's company.

His memory was still hazy from the long sleep. He did not wish to be reminded of his horrible reality, but it was bound to return. Oh yeah- his wife had been captured by the Military Police... Right...

There was only one bedroom in the house, and the night before, Grisha had volunteered to sleep on the floor. Armin chose to sleep where his wife Annie usually slept, and Eren took the spot belonging to his blonde friend. Now awake, he turned his head to look at his friend, noticing his tightly clenched fists atop the covers.

"…Armin?" Eren whispered, checking if his friend was awake. His dream had left him eager to talk about his thoughts with someone. After a few seconds of silence, he was about to conclude that his friend was asleep when he heard him take in a breath in the dark.

"I'm awake." Armin sighed. "But I don't feel conscious… Is this even real, Eren?"

The brunette wished it wasn't. "Yeah, it's real." He wishes that Mikasa could lie beside him. He dreamed that he could reach his hand out to her and she would grasp it in hers. He longed to touch her silky hair and look into her gleaming moonlit eyes, touch her soft skin and taste her sweet lips. But bittersweet memories surfaced in his mind and pushed a tear out from his eyes. He wished to see her. Just once.

"It's okay to cry Armin." Eren said, but mostly to himself.

Armin nodded silently. "I am pitiful. Crying myself to sleep every night since they took them from us. And I really haven't done a thing to help anyone. Dammit."

Eren understood Armin's sorrow perfectly, but deep inside him he was beyond grateful for Armin to agree to take them in for the night. He wishes his friend would understand that, but at the moment he did not wish to speak about it. Eren's blind enthusiasm to eliminate titans was one of the things that helped keep him alive all these years... But he has never felt so in need to save others, especially when he knew his former comrades were really just wearing masks back in the day. They had turned on him. And he couldn't have felt more betrayed.

But there's no time for those thoughts! He pushed them from his mind and tried to remain positive. "We will find them, OK? Promise me to… never lose hope."

Armin did not reply.

The darkness enveloped him once again. Drowsiness forced his eyelids to fall back down. Eren drifted back into his dreams, this time the setting seemed rosy and fresh, like the smell of flowers after a spring rain.

The silence was loud in his head.

A girl lies in the midst of light blue flowers beside me. She was wearing a light pink sweater and a long white dress, something most parents preferred their five year-olds to wear. Her muted clothing would have been mistaken for part of the scenery, and had I only noticed she was there beside me when I saw her hair… It was long and fell beside her small frame, dark as the night, and looked soft as silk. Tiny droplets of water dropped gently from her delicate features as she turned her head and smiled into my eyes. Somehow that simple gesture felt so heartwarming. When was the last time someone had moved their lips in such a way? I cannot even recall. I called out to the girl using the name of my wife. Then she laughed soundlessly. She shook her head, as if dismissing my comment.

She reached a small hand up to her head to block the emerging sun. A spring breeze pushed away the pale grey clouds as the girl said something to me. She smiled and kicked her feet playfully on the grass. I've nearly forgotten how to show a simple gesture as this, but somehow a smile appeared on my lips again, this time without me noticing until my cheeks began to hurt.

Sweet was the word to describe how I felt laying in these endless green and blue acres. Something in the air was definitely like the scent of nectar; the atmosphere was light and gentle just like the young girl I was sharing my time with. She looked so familiar, so much like my wife, but something was different.

Suddenly she turned her head towards me again, beaming brightly. My ears strained to hear her words through the heavy silence.

"I love you,

…papa!"

Hello, hello all my lovely friends ;w; I'm so sorry again for not updating in awhile. But don't worry I'm not dead haha :)

thank you guys for the continued support during my time away... Your messages really mean a whole lot to me and really motivated me to finish this chapter. This month has been terribly busy and I hit some writer's block, but hopefully some fluff can make up for it? LOL just kidding, no excuses, but please spare my life haha :D

And uh, another note: Some people sometimes complain about how my some of my chapters are short. Sorry about that, but it's really not constructive and all you're doing is echoing my own thoughts at me. I understand it's short but some of my reasoning for it is that by cutting it off I can make a point with what my focus is in that particular chapter, or so I can cut it off and start with a fresh thought on the next chapter. That's all. Thank you for understanding :)

Anyways I hope you guys will enjoy! I will try to write more often now~ And please fuel my engine with reviews ~ 3