Sorry about this being such a short chapter but... If I left this in for the next chapter it would have been both too long and too abrupt. So here's hopefully the shortest chapter. As a consolation prize I'll be posting the next chapter in a day or two.
Libra-no-ninja: Thank you. I'm glad you like my characterizations, they are a key part of the story for me as well. And it's a good thing you like Jiraiya you'll see lots of him coming up.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Naruto woke in a hospital bed to light shining on his eyes. He bolted upright, startled and worried until Kurama reassured him, "Easy there. You passed out after completing Bunta's challenge. You needed to rest so Jiraiya put you in here, just in case something went wrong."
Naruto was surprised by that, but he also felt an uncomfortable cross between touched and bitter by the gesture. "Don't be bitter about what he did Naruto. It's not in your nature, and it does more harm than good." Kurama told him. "Now you should get up. You've had a good night's rest and we need to train hard today to build up your reserves."
"Wait, I was here all night? But Hinata-" Naruto protested worriedly, his brain catching up to the full implications of what Kurama said.
"Was just fine. Iruka took your shift watching." Kurama told him. "And speaking of which, check your bed table. There should be a note from him."
Naruto turned and was surprised that, yes, there was a note from Iruka there. Naruto grabbed it and grinned. Iruka was offering to take him out for ramen. "That should be a good break for you. Now get dressed. We need to get going."
"Do we have time to stop in with Bushy Brows first?" Naruto asked as he changed out of the hospital gown and grabbed Iruka's note.
Kurama waited until Naruto was out the door to tell him, "I think it should be fine, and Lee could use the company."
That made Naruto feel a bit better, and he hurried up a floor. No one else was around, and there was a sign on Lee's door that warned to be quiet. That wasn't good. That meant Lee was asleep still.
"Or they don't want to excite him." Kurama offered. "Step in and see."
Naruto complied, noting a shadow under the door as he turned the knob. Probably Gai or Tenten checking up on him as well. Nothing unusual there.
But when Naruto opened the door, he was instead greeted by Gaara, holding out an arm and sand moving to surround Lee.
"I'd stop that if I were you." Naruto warned coldly, tensing his right arm and preparing to summon his sword.
"Do not interfere." Came an equally cold response. "You won't deny me his life. Mother screams for his blood."
"If you think that voice is your mother, you're wrong." Naruto countered. "And your fight with him ended. Let him go."
"He didn't die. There was interference. But Mother screams for blood." Gaara insisted hoarsely.
Naruto glared, ready to react but Kurama told him, "Shukaku."
Naruto understood, and told Gaara, "Shukaku isn't your mother. Nor can he protect you if you harm my friend."
Gaara froze. The sand paused in mid-air, and Naruto called up chakra to his limbs. "He lost. That's enough. You don't need to give into the call for blood." Naruto told Gaara placatingly.
"This is impossible." Gaara whispered. "You- what are you?"
"Someone who understands." Naruto offered.
"No one understands! No, you're just like the others. So Konoha joins my father's quest to end my existence." Gaara snarled. "I will not dissapear to the likes of you!"
Gaara's sand started to move again but a swipe of green disrupted it. Gai materialised between Naruto and Gaara and ordered the Sand Genin, "Cease this at once. You are in a hospital, and that is my student. You will leave."
"Or what?" Gaara demanded.
"Then no matter what you contain I will end you." Gai warned. "Do not think me incapable."
Gaara stared for a moment, before meeting Naruto's eyes. "You have my attention. And Mother will enjoy taking your blood. We look forward to it."
"You'll forever live in anticipation." Naruto promised.
Gaara glared at Naruto for a long moment before turning and leaving the hospital all together. Gai watched him leave and shook his head. "What a waste. Thank you for stepping in Naruto. I'll keep a closer eye on Lee in the future. I wouldn't want that boy to try anything unyouthful."
Naruto nodded and looked back at Lee. "Is he getting better?"
"No." Gai admitted, looking mournfully at his student. "I wish it were different but Lee did so much damage to himself during that fight. He'll wake up, he'll be able to walk with assistance but it's likely he'll never be a shinobi."
Naruto stared at Lee's unconscious form, and he looked back at where Gaara was walking. "I could take his head off from here." He offered.
"Would it let Lee walk again?" Gai asked. Naruto flinched at that, and Gai shook his head. "It is good that you are loyal to your friends but that is not the answer. Lee's youthful spirit will let him pull through. He will recover, I'm certain. If you don't mind, I'd like a few moments alone with my student. I'll be available to train with you later if you'd like."
(Nothing Else Seems to Work)
Iruka was a little surprised to see such a despondent Naruto show up for ramen. "Hey Naruto. I thought you weren't going to make it." He teased the boy. Naruto looked up and gave a weak smile.
"Sorry sensei. I just got a bit behind." He apologised. "I stopped in to see Lee after I was released. Wanted to make sure he was still doing all right."
"That's fine. It's a good reason for being late. I'm glad to see you recovered after your ordeal. Everyone's talking about the giant frog that appeared outside of the village." Iruka informed him. He waited for Naruto to light up at the comment, since the boy loved being the center of attention.
It didn't come. "Toad. Gambunta's the toad boss. I think he'd eat anyone that called him a frog. Or step on them." Naruto stated as he sat down.
Iruka was now getting worried. "Ok Naruto, what's up? You're really down in the dumps today."
"I stopped in to see Lee. Gaara, one of the Sand genin, was there to kill him. In his sleep." Naruto crossed his arms on the bench and rested his chin on them. "I delayed him and Gai showed up, so Gaara left but it turns out Bushy Brows won't ever be a shinobi again. He got too hurt."
Iruka offered a comforting smile but he knew it didn't reach his eyes. "But you know that's a risk right? For any shinobi. And Lee's alive."
"Yeah. And I'm happy about that. But I don't get Gaara." Naruto admitted. "How could he... Lee couldn't move. Lee wasn't conscious. Even if he wakes up, he'll never be a threat to Gaara. And Gaara was about to kil him, in cold blood, because he could. How could someone like him do that?"
"Someone like him?" Iruka asked, puzzled.
Naruto sat up and tapped his stomach. Iruka felt his eyes go wide. "He's a jinchiriki?" He asked quietly.
"Yeah. And I don't get how he could do something like that." Naruto told him. "He's been a victim. He's been alone, possibly attacked for what he is. How could he let himself become a monster? What made him change?"
"Are we talking about Gaara or you Naruto?" Iruka wondered. Out loud, he offered, "I think sometimes it happens because people don't want to hurt anymore."
Naruto looked at him curiously, and Iruka struggled to pick his words. "It's like... Have you ever looked at a bully on the playground, and wondered why they're like that? Sometimes the kid is just nasty; they enjoy hurting people. But other times, they're just people like you and me who feel powerless. Something went wrong in their life, and all they know to do is lash out. They get to have some control in their lives by having power over you. You know, like an abuse victim in turn abuses their children?"
"That doesn't make sense." Naruto exclaimed. "You know how much it hurts to be a victim. Why would you ever inflict that pain on someone else?"
"Because you know how much it hurts. And because it hurts that much, at so little cost to yourself, you must be very powerful to cause it." Iruka told him. "I agree with you Naruto; I don't see how people can ever feel good about their power coming from hurting others. But we're shinobi. People don't see how we can be human. They see monsters that wield incredible power and kill for money. Never mind that we also train doctors that heal impossible wounds, or are sent in teams to aid struggling nations. People don't always see beyond the obvious, and the horrible extremes. And like it or not, there are many that become shinobi because they are good at hurting people. It becomes an acceptable outlet."
"But we don't just pick whoever's the weakest and target them, do we?" Naruto asked.
"No. We don't choose at all. We accept a mission that someone pays for. Sometimes it's protecting someone. Sometimes it's spying. Sometimes it's assassinating someone." Iruka told him. "We all have to choose what we do. Konoha doesn't do many assassination missions, because they are morally ambiguous and more often than not, they endanger Konoha more than they protect it. But it needs to be done sometimes. But that doesn't answer your original question, does it?"
Naruto shook his head. Iruka shrugged. "I'm not an expert on how people think Naruto." Iruka told him. "But I think that sometimes, life kicks people down so many times that they want to give up. It's hard, caring about people. You invest so much of yourself in them. You feel amazing while they're there but life isn't always kind. If it hurts to try, and you get slapped down for it, why would you bother? Eventually, people do give up. I think Gaara was one who was slapped down so many times that the only thing he still cares about is himself, and he hurts people so he won't be hurt anymore. Because everything else is so hard, and offers him so little, that he doesn't see the value in trying to be kind to others."
Naruto flinched. "I don't think that'll happen to you though." Iruka told him with a warm grin.
"No?" Naruto asked worriedly.
Iruka turned to Teuchi as the chef approached, having finished serving another customer, and asked him, "Teuchi, what would you say to Naruto picking on another genin?"
"I'd tell him to quit if he ever wanted to eat at my stand again." Teuchi told him. "And Ayna would smack him upside the head. If it got worse, we'd report it to you or the Hokage."
"And what would Kakashi think? Or Sasuke? Or Hinata?" Iruka asked Naruto. "Can you ever imagine yourself being cruel Naruto? Actually hurting someone for the sake of hurting them?"
"Yes." Naruto admitted after a long pause. "And it terrifies me."
"Why? Are you afraid of what people would think? Or of repercussions?" Iruka pressed.
"No." Naruto admitted. "I'm wondering how I could look at myself in the mirror after I did something like that. And I know the answer; if I managed it once, it would get easier with time and eventually I won't recognise who's in the mirror. I don't ever want to see that."
"And that's why it won't happen to you." Iruka told him. "You let people in. You got close to others. You made the choice, and who you are now won't accept such cruelty."
"But what if I lost someone? Jiji's old, and we're all shinobi. What if I lost one of you? Cause right now I'd snap in a heartbeat if someone hurt one of you." Naruto told Iruka. "How does that make me different than Gaara? Sure I did it because I care about people but in the end, I still descended to be the monster."
Iruka thought that one over. "Would you though?" He asked softly. "Think about that Naruto. If you lost Hinata today, would you let that destroy you? Would you decide that life wasn't worth living? Hunt down her killer, or killers, and then kill their friends and family in retribution before killing yourself? Or worse, keep living and terrorize those who simply seek to live their lives?"
Naruto swallowed and shook his head violently. "No! I could never do that! Hinata wouldn't want that!"
"Then you've answered your own question." Iruka told him. He ruffled Naruto's hair, with a more familiar, if annoyed, face appearing on the blonde. "Now, if the dreary part of the conversation is over, I wanted to talk with you about the exam."
"Really? What about sensei?" Naruto asked, his curiosity momentarily surpassing his gloom. Iruka took that as an opening.
"Well, I heard you're against Neji in the first round. And while you've become really good, there is a massive risk fighting a Hyuga. I'm pretty sure you'll win but if he hits you, you could lose your ability to use chakra." Iruka explained. "This will be different than fighting Hinata; Neji's much more precise. With Hinata the effect would wear off after a bit but you won't be that lucky with Neji."
"I could just not get hit." Naruto pointed out. "I have enough jutsu at my disposal to take him out without him getting near."
"Yes, you do. And what are you going to do when he makes a comment about Hinata being a loser?" Iruka asked wryly. Naruto blushed and Iruka continued, "What I was going to show you was a technique medical-nin use to help fix those who have had their chakra nodes sealed by Hyuga before."
"A medical ninjutsu?" Naruto asked worriedly. "Sensei, my control isn't anywhere near good enough for that."
"Actually, control isn't the problem." Iruka told him. "Sealing chakra nodes is like damming a river. It can go away on its own but that leaves the victim of the technique unable to use chakra from below the blocked node. Medical-nin unblock the points by pushing chakra through them. You have so much chakra that you could be taught to push your points back open. And I'm able to teach you."
Naruto's eyes went wide. "You are? Please sensei, would you teach me that?"
"Of course Naruto. What, did you think I'd invited you out to ramen and told you about this great technique just to tease you with the idea of it?" Iruka teased. Naruto shrugged and Iruka shook his head. "Never mind, you're being taught by Jiraiya. I suppose that happens quite a bit. Here, hold out your hand."
Naruto complied and Iruka flipped the hand to be palm up. "Here's a chakra node at your wrist. It's a common one to hit, since it blocks chakra to your hands. This is how it feels." Iruka's finger went blue with chakra and Naruto grimaced at the slight burn that he felt when it touched his wrist. "That's how it feels right now from a novice. A skilled Hyuga won't let you feel a thing. And Neji is very skilled. Try and pour chakra into your hand, just to make them glow."
Naruto concentrated for a moment, and nothing happened on his right hand but his left glowed. "Good. That's how it should work to start with. Now-" Naruto didn't seem to hear him, and his face tightened in concentration and suddenly right hand was bursting with chakra. "Or you could do that."
Naruto stared at his hand and turned to Iruka. "Was that supposed to happen?"
"Well, for most people it isn't that showy but yes." Iruka told him. "I was going to show you how to run chakra through your right hand to fix it but really, your reserves are so big that you can probably just push chakra out and fix the blockage. You won't always get to concentrate like that in battle."
"No. But I also won't be fighting Hyuga all that often. Hopefully." Naruto replied. "Thanks sensei. That really helped."
"Any time Naruto." Iruka grinned, signalling Teuchi that it was safe to come over now. While he hadn't expected the chakra to appear like that, there had been the risk with Naruto's reserves and if Kurama helped him out it could be more destructive than he intended, so Iruka had arranged ahead of time for the ramen stand to be safe. Now that it was safe, time to distract Naruto with ramen to keep his spirits up.
"Sensei, where'd you learn to use medical ninjutsu? You never mentioned it at the school." Naruto told him.
Iruka grimaced. "Well, I leaned medical ninjutsu because of my sensei Naruto. He couldn't teach it to me but he pushed me into being a medic, since he said they were very valuable and well learned which, in his mind, was a manditory trait for being a shinobi. He was a good motivator, and I became a very skilled medic because of him. But while I learned a lot from him, I'm not all that proud of my sensei or where he got his knowledge from."
"You don't talk about him ever." Naruto pointed out.
"He wasn't the best role model. He's why I decided to be a teacher." Iruka told him. "He showed me how dangerous it was to have incompetent teachers around, so I made sure that our future genin would at least get a good starting education."
"Then he couldn't have been all bad." Naruto told him cheerfully. Iruka looked at him askance and Naruto continued, "Come on, he taught you to be awesome, and he drove you to be the best teacher in Konoha. That's got to say something for his teaching style."
Iruka thought about that for a moment and grinned ruefully. "I can't say he wasn't an effective teacher, nor an inefficient one. And he taught me many things. But that doesn't make him a good man."
"Doesn't have to. Who he is doesn't matter." Naruto told Iruka. "Who you are does. And if he helped make you this awesome, then he at least did one thing right." With that, Naruto's attention went solely to the bowl of ramen in front of him.
Iruka just chuckled, though it was still pretty rueful. "Maybe." He thought. "But that doesn't make up for everything else."
(Nothing else seems to work)
Naruto stood by the memorial stone, eyes passing slowly down the mass of names. It was getting cramped now. They'd need a new stone soon.
He was stalling. And he knew it.
"The exam is in an hour Naruto." Kurama warned him softly. "Neji is waiting."
Yes he was. Waiting for Naruto to fight him. And he didn't know he could win.
He put his hand on the memorial stone, tracing the names, searching blindly for two names to appear. Were they on there?
"Of course. They were shinobi of the village." Kurama reminded him. "And they would be proud of you. How could they not be?"
"Because I'm afraid. Afraid that when I set foot in that arena, I'm going to fail." Naruto replied, clenching his fists.
"You are stronger than him." Kurama said cautiously.
"Yeah. Strong enough to walk into that arena, kill him before he blinks." Naruto agreed grimly. "And I want to. I- I need to beat him Kurama, but I don't think I can do it without... Without crossing that line. Without killing him for the sake of enjoying it."
Kurama gave a rueful chuckle. "You are afraid of that slope aren't you?" She asked gently.
"It feels like a cliff. One moment I'm here, the next I free fall and stop caring." Naruto replied.
"You aren't Gaara. I'm not Shukaku. We won't lose control today." Kurama promised. "You won't kill Neji. You have something much more precious on the line than revenge."
Naruto was a bit startled at that, but before he could ask the sound of unsteady footsteps warned him that someone was approaching. He turned around and his eyes went wide in surprise. "Hinata?" He voiced.
(Nothing else seems to work)
Hinata bit her lip as she approached, Kurama's words ringing in her ears. "He needs you this time Hinata." Kurama had told her. "Go to him. He's at the memorial stone."
Sasuke and Kurama had brought her in on Kurama's secret, so the private information wasn't what surprised her. It was Naruto, standing by the memorial stone, Kurama relaying their conversation and turning to Hianta for help that surprised her. Naruto was afraid again. Not of fighting Neji, no, but of himself losing control during the fight. And her response. "Do I mean that much to him?" Hinata wondered, slightly warmed and worried. "Does he fear my disproval so much?"
That was a surprising amount of power over her crush, more than she liked. But she needed to be here. Naruto saw her, and looked worried. "Are you ok to be up and about like this?" He asked her, stepping forward anxiously.
"I was released two days ago, remember? You made me promise I'd do as perscribed and take it easy." She reminded him teasingly, trying to keep her voice from shaking. "I was wondering why you stopped. You didn't forget the match was today did you?"
"It's today? Crap I better go get ready." Naruto replied hastily, his voice wrought with fake panic. Hinata chuckled and Naruto gave a warm grin. "Nah, I just... I just wanted to stop here I guess. I can see why Kakashi-sensei gets lost here."
"Searching for names?" She asked him.
"Yeah." Naruto shrugged. "Hoping that one or two would jump out at me. No such luck yet."
Hinata looked at the stone, then at Naruto. "What would you do if you found them?" She asked. "What would you want to say?"
"Thank them I guess." Naruto replied after a moment of thought. "Say hello and goodbye. Let them know how their son is doing. Hope they'd be proud of me."
"Why shouldn't they be?" Hinata asked. "You are a loyal shinobi. You're a good person."
Naruto didn't answer that. Hinata knew they didn't have time for Naruto to ease his worries out. "Why are you really here Naruto-kun?" Hinata asked softly.
Naruto sighed, and rolled his shoulders, not looking at her. "You would be upset if Neji didn't come home today, wouldn't you?" He asked her.
"O-of course I would be." Hinata replied, startled.
Naruto nodded, almost knowingly. "And I don't think I can keep from doing that." He told her. "I... It scares me right now Hinata. I want to kill him. I actively want to hunt down and beat him to death. Not hurt him or embarrass him; kill him."
That was a shock to Hinata but not as big of one as it might be. Kakashi and Sasuke felt the same way. Team 7 was a family, with a strong bond now that made them all protective of each other. "So-" She started but Naruto cut her off swiftly.
"Gaara's a jinchuriki." He told her. And that piece clicked everything else together for Hinata.
"Naruto-kun, that's foolish. Thinking you'll turn into Gaara." Hinata told him chidingly. He turned to her, surprised and she continued, "Why do you want to beat Neji to death?"
"Because he hurt you." Naruto told her quietly, his hands tightening into fists. "Because he stood over you, mocked you and hurt you and left you for dead. Because you are the most precious person to me and he tried to take you from me. Because you've suffered at the hands of your family yet stay loyal to them, fight for them and this was their thanks."
"Because in the end, I suffered and deserve better?" Hinata asked with a soft smile. "And what about you Naruto? If I deserve better so do you. You have fought, bled and are willing to die for this village. Who, beyond Teuchi's family, Iruka, the Hokage and our team have ever bothered with you? You flinch when you walk down the streets and someone raises their arms. You smile at everyone, a sad smile that you try and make look carefree, while you pity those who scowl and spit at you. And you'd die for them in a heartbeat if you thought it would save them."
Hinata stepped forward, Kurama still gently prompting her to keep going. "A lot of people deserve better Naruto-kun. The fact that you wish it were so makes you better than Gaara. The fact that you want to avenge me rather than kill for fun does too. You aren't the kind to hold a grudge, and you want him to pay for what he has done. So fight him. Show the world you're better than they thought. Show the village who they turned out, who they jeered at. And when the time comes, be better than them. You won't kill him Naruto."
"How can you be sure?" He asked. Hinata stood closer, nearly touching and she took his fisted hands in hers. Her face heated up from the contact but her voice didn't waver.
"Because I'm asking you. Please Naruto, don't kill him. Don't cripple him. Win your match and nothing more. Promise me?" She asked, her eyes meeting his. Naruto paused before nodding slowly.
"I promise." Naruto replied, his voice very quiet and his features going red. But even so, his real smile came out and he told her, "I'm going to beat that bastard down in front of everyone though. I'm going to win."
Hinata smiled at that, and felt a giddy rush of relief. With a sudden bit of courage she didn't think she had, she told him, "Good. I expect to see you win the tournament. And this," She leaned forward and pecked him once on the cheek, "Is for luck. Go get them Naruto-kun."
Naruto froze, his face red as a tomato as soon as Hinata's lips met his cheek. He didn't say a word, he didn't move, she wasn't sure he was breathing. And Kurama started roaring in laughter that made Hinata go beet red too, and she took a step back before all but running towards the stadium. Well, mission accomplished. Naruto was feeling better. Here's hoping he'd still talk to her after the match.
(Nothing else seems to work)
Naruto was absolutely dumbstruck, his face feeling like someone plugged it into a wall socket as he watched Hinata's retreating form. "What the hell just happened?" Was about all he had left for cohearent thought.