:There's A Girl At St. Bartleby's!: Chapter Twelve
Memo: I really thought about making this chapter from Kris's POV instead because I had the most amazing scene planned up between her, Raleigh and Deidre that was full of awkwardness and angst but…its Artemis that moves the plot along at this point. So maybe the nice little angst scene will work it's way in somewhere else. Thank you to my most lovely reviewers, especially Israe who reviewed about ten minutes after I posted the chapter. Talk about some serious speed. It was really quite amazing, and totally boosted my self-esteem. Writing Artemis is hard, so hopefully it comes out all right. Any OOC is necessary. But I'll try to keep it to the bare minimum. Oh yeah, and I do NOT thank Qouteninja4, because she doesn't want to come home. Just remember which football team you support, and which city we're closer too.
Disclaimer: Just because Artemis is a high-tech cage in my basement does not mean I own him. So don't think I do.
:Story Start:
'You once were beautiful, I hear
I hear it can be beautiful.'
All in all, my plan was progressing well. I had sought out the Holtecombe boy that Kristina often hung out with. He had not been as soft spoken and well kept as he often appeared in public. I had always assumed… Although it seemed my assumptions were turning out fairly inaccurate these days. This was a fact that irked me and frowning ever so slightly, I rubbed my temples and thought back to last Thursday.
.:.:.:.:.Flashback.:.:.:.:.
Getting a hold of this boy was not going to easy, that much I was aware of. His friends were almost creepishly overprotective of him. To get to Holtecombe, I was going to have to find a way to distract the pair of them. Raleigh O'Connor would be easy enough. I didn't even need a plan for him. After all, Kristina Smith was practically a walking distraction. As for the other boy, I didn't really know his name but he was very short, distractions didn't seem to faze him at all. In fact, I think he lived for them. He was the one who threw me for a loop. The shrimp, perhaps, would need the persuasive help of the mesmer.
With this in my mind and Holly floating invisible over my shoulder, I straightened my tie and headed out.
As I expected, the shrimpy boy was just coming out of his room. This was the one Kristina had told me about with a sarcastic tone accompanied by a roll of her eyes and a casual shrug. The flirt. She had called him Jake, I didn't know his last name.
Jake stiffened when he saw me coming and stopped walking to glare in my direction. "Oy, Fowl." He snarled. "What are you doing all the way down here? Kris's room is back that way."
He called it Kris's room, not Raleigh's room. I noted the wording. For some reason, it seemed important. Obviously this boy wanted me near Raleigh even less than he wanted me around Kris.
With a casual glance over my shoulder to where Holly was still hovering, invisible, I heaved a theatrical sigh. The more convincing I appeared, the better. "Don't you have somewhere else to be, Jake?" I asked annoyance tempering my voice.
Shrimpy Boy's eyes narrowed. "If I did before, I don't anymore." He stated bluntly, crossing his arms in a stubborn defiance. "Why are you heading towards my dorm room?" Jake demanded.
My own eyes narrowed slightly, and I forced myself to relax. Natural, I must remain natural. There was much more at stake here than what some foolish little boy thought of me. My ego could live. No part of the plan should be allowed to go astray. Natural, just remain natural. This was not the first time I had ever outmaneuvered someone and it will certainly not be the last. "I didn't know that walking down a hallway was a crime these days." I snipped.
Jake snorted diversely. "It is for you, Fowl. Aren't you some kind of hermit or something?"
"I believe you have something else to do, Jacob." I said matter-of-factly. This seemed to annoy him even more.
As he opened his mouth to retort, Holly took her cue. The green-skinned elf materialized into view just above my shoulder. Words no longer appeared to be something Jacob was capable of. He merely stared at the fairy in shock, a look of confusion on his face. Locking eyes with the boy only a few feet taller than herself, Holly let her magic roll.
"Go on Jacob," she said, her voice melodic and seductive under the mesmer's influence. It was certainly something to hear, even if you weren't on the receiving end. "There is nothing to see here. Just outside and take a nice long walk."
Jake blinked, trying to fight the magical effects and regain control of his thoughts. "Outside…walk." He bleated, eyes misty. Still fighting it, he shook his head a couple of times.
Holly pressed a little harder. "That's it, go outside. There's nothing to see here. Nothing at all."
Finally, Jake gave in. Still a little misty eyed, and more than slightly dazed, he headed towards the grounds.
With a relieved sigh, Holly shielded herself once again. I could feel the slight disturbance in the air just above my shoulder and knew she was still there. "I would prefer not having to mesmerize anyone Artemis." Holly whispered in my ear. I could tell she was annoyed with me, but if that was the worst I would get from her, it didn't matter. "After all, I don't know how much magic I need for this escapade of yours. If you would just tell me the whole plan for once…"
"It is not important for you to know the whole plan." I whispered back, barely moving my lips at all. Should anyone come out of their dorm, all they would see would be the school felon muttering darkly to himself. This reputation of mine was becoming more useful then I could've ever imagined. "If you need to know, I will tell you. But not until you need to know and only whatyou need to know."
Holly's frustrated silence was all the answer I needed. "I know you're not fond of the sun," I continued softly, my eyes trained on the upcoming doorways. I did not want to waltz into the wrong room. "There is nothing else you can do to help today. You may go if you wish."
Within seconds, there was no longer a hovering presence over my shoulder. Holly had left me then. Perhaps I would apologize later. Hard feelings would only create tension. The last thing I needed was an angry elf working a kink into my plan. But that would have to be worked out later.
Right now, there were slightly more important things to deal with. Hopefully Finnegan Holtecombe was as kind-hearted and patient as always Kristina described him. It was no small task I was laying before him. Even I could classify it as virtually impossible on several terms.
Opening the door to the other boys' room, I found Finnegan sitting at his desk. The chair was tilted back and his legs were on the desktop. There appeared to be some sort of notebook in his lap. When I entered, he turned and I caught the glimmer of surprised that flickered briefly across his face. He hadn't been expecting company, by the looks of it.
"Artemis Fowl," he said as he brought his chair back to its proper position with all four feet on the floor. "Well, this is a surprise! And here I was expecting Raleigh. To what do I owe this astute honor?" There was a cautious smile on his lips, he was so very different from Jacob, but he made no move to great me further.
For a moment, I wondered why this was. I had noted that Finnegan had the most manners of his little posse. Then it registered in my mind that I had seen Finnegan before. It had been in our first year, he had not been nearly as sure of himself. And my various adventures had yet to change me, to make me a better person. Back then, Holly and Mother hadn't instilled that blasted conscience. If I remember correctly, which I usually did, a stammering Finnegan had hesitantly asked me out. My response had not been kind. Small wonder his friends didn't want me near him.
"I came to ask a favor." I said bluntly. There was no need to cut corners here.
"Shoot." Finnegan replied, looking more than mildly curious.
I took a deep breath. How should I word this? It wasn't hard to act embarrassed, it was not every day that the Artemis Fowl had to ask for help, but there needed to be more to it than just that. I had to be believable, real. I needed to sound like a teenager, not just act like one.
After another deep breath, I was able to manage a convincing rushed reply. "I want you to help make me romantic so Kris will go out with me." I said very fast, dropping my eyes to the ground for just a moment.
There was a pregnant pause as Finnegan stared at me, stunned. His eyebrows were so far up on his forehead I could barely see them. Honestly, was the idea of me dating someone that surprising? I could be perfectly civil when I so felt like it. After all, was I being civil right now, was I not?
"Why?" Finn finally asked, staring at me in such a way that suggested he was trying to figure a fairly difficult math problem. "You've never shown much interest in Kris before now."
I had the decency to blush.
He scrutinized me for a moment. "Alright," Finn finally consented. "I'll help you Artemis. Your goals seemed a bit more…pure than Jake's. That boy can't seem to take a hint. He's like a raccoon with something shiny in it's hand." He chuckled slightly.
Oh could he ever be farther from the truth. My intentions were not nearly as friendly as Jacobs. Compared with me, his intentions were as pure as snow.
.:.:.:.:.End Flashback.:.:.:.:.
The all-important first step was almost complete. Finn kept his promise. He had the next hour and half teaching me everything I would possibly need to know. Date etiquette, what to say and what not to say, how to treat a girl, how to let her know you care, everything and anything he could think of. Everything he had said to me was cataloged in my brain. When I had requested he keep this secret, my excuse being that I wanted Kris to be surprised, the boy had pantomimed locking his mouth with a key and throwing it over his shoulder. Kris had certainly been right, Finnegan had the potential to be a very good friend. Shame I planned on never talking to him again.
It was the next step that worried me. Kris might very well say no. I simply couldn't afford to go back to the drawing board at this point in time. My fear wasn't the normal, teenaged boy, hormone-based fear. The hormones were there, raging insistently in the back of my mind and there was no doubt about that. But they were not quite as prominent. Perhaps this is what Finnegan had felt like before he had asked me out, so many years ago. Somehow, I doubted it.
I had not yet seen Kris leave her dorm room. That was good, it would give me more time to plan, to collect myself. According to Finn, nerves were a date's undoing. Yet not looking nervous would give me away for sure. This was an endless paradox, this romance business. Small wonder Juliet didn't date anyone. Who would willingly put themselves through this process?
Perhaps a walk on the grounds would calm my nerves. It was a Saturday, and the garden would be completely empty. This school was so noisy and crowded that the garden was often my safe haven from the bustle.
The sound of raised voices leaked under Kris's door as I passed. O'Connor must've messed something yet again. Oh well, at least that something I didn't have to deal with.
Skirting around the grounds, I could hear my classmates' laughter from far away. Boys playing association and Gaelic, teasing each other and making easy jokes. It was a world I had never been a part, a world I didn't want to be part of.
As I had expected, there was no one in the gardens. A relaxed, calm feeling hung in the air. The tall hedges that made up the garden walls kept out the noise my classmates made. The quiet was a welcome change, and I was automatically a little less tense.
"Artemis!" Kris's voice floated to my ears, surprised yet happy. "When did you get here?"
I started. Hadn't I just heard Kris in her dorm room, fighting with the O'Connor boy? There was no way she could've possibly gotten down here before me. Saturday wasn't normally a visiting day. Kris should be the only girl on campus. Perhaps Shrimpy Boy had completely forgone all of puberty? I dismissed that thought almost immediately. No boy's voice could get that high, hormones or no hormones.
"Artemis?" she asked, her voice concerned as it drew nearer. Kris rounded the corner, and I could tell she had fled her dorm room to be out here. Not even she would willingly wear slippers, baggy Snoopy pajamas and an over large, holey Franklin Day sweatshirt (her old high school, I presume) out in public.
"I just got here," I finally managed to answer.
Smiling, Kris came over and tugged on the sleeve of my tailored sweater. "No suit," she commented lightly. "Now that's a first."
I shrugged the statement off casually, knowing she didn't approve of my lack of 'casual clothes'. "Actually," I said tactfully. Might as well get this ordeal over and done with. After all, there was no time like the present. "I have a question to ask of you."
"Fire away!" Kristina chirped happily, glancing up in the direction of her dorm room.
"I was wondering," I said, concentrating on the rose bush over her shoulder. 'Take it slow. You're nervous and unsure. This is the first time you've ever asked a girl out.' Well that, at least, wasn't a lie. 'Take it slow, nice and hesitant.'
Kristina stared at me with her hands behind her back, misty blue eyes hopefully curious. I couldn't help but wonder what was going on her mind. Could she possibly know what I was about to ask her?
"I was wondering." My voice remained slow and cautious. "If you would like to go out with me." A blush rose to color my cheeks, unforced and completely natural. I lifted my eyes from the rose bush to look at her.
A small smile crept across Kristina's face. Was it a smile of acceptance, or of sorrow? All my years of experience in reading emotions and feelings in others appeared to have gone up in smoke. How very frustrating. All I could do at the point was cross my fingers and hope. Say yes just say yes…
"Alright." Kristina said and a giant weight seemed to be lifted off of my chest. "I'll go out with you Artemis." The smile was still on her face, warm and sincere.
A small pang of guilt shot through my mind. She was nice enough, Kristina, and certainly didn't deserve what I was planning to do her. The guilt didn't last long however. Step one was complete. Compared to this, the rest of my plan would be relatively easy. And I had my first date, my first ever girlfriend. Mother would be so proud.
"I'll see you around, Artemis." Kristina said softly, and bent forward to kiss my cheek once before she walked off, humming gently to herself.
I brought one hand up to my cheek as she left. It was pleasantly warm.
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Sorry, the girlfriend didn't really make it in to this chapter. But she's coming, oh is she coming. Remember the Rapid Review Rabbit. He loves you all so
