A.N:
Thanks for the input! :D
Flora will definitely be getting some more... hints :)
As for the Dragon Instincts, we don't know if Natsu performed the 'mating ritual-' but he's definitely feeling Lucy being gone.
Sooo without further ado, cue Natsu angst.
I don't own Fairy Tail!
-UM
"Heeeey – Natsu! Get out here!" Macao grabbed his forearm and pulled him towards the dance floor. When his beer sloshed, he quit pulling and threw his arm around Natsu's shoulder.
Natsu raised a brow. The reception started forty minutes ago… the guy was already plastered?
Macao chuckled into his ear and the alcohol on his breath made Natsu cringe.
"Look at 'em Natsu!" He whisper-yelled into his ear and motioned to women dancing in front of them.
"All of 'em are wishing they got married today, they'll do just about anything." He wriggled his eyebrows at him, Natsu rolled his eyes and shook him off.
He took a few steps from him, "Not interested. You seen Happy?"
He burst out laughing. "All these willing women and you want your cat?!" He pulled the beer to his lips and chugged the rest of it and threw the finished glass at the wall. The couple nearby shrieked and glared when the glass hit beside them. Natsu swallowed a scoff. Like it wasn't anything they weren't used too? The couple got up and moved back to the dance floor.
Natsu's hands twitched as he watched his drunken elder return to laughing at him. Fighting Macao might actually be fun, sure a hell of a lot more enjoyable than this party. He didn't want to be here. He didn't want to celebrate. He didn't want 'willing women,' he wanted one woman – and she had been missing for seven months.
His lip kicked up showing a fang, "You wanna go old man? I said I wasn't interested. But I wouldn't mind kicking your ass."
Macao just laughed and waved him off as he headed back towards the dance floor.
Maybe a wedding reception wasn't the best time to start a fight…but it was the only way Natsu knew how to act normal.
Act normal.
Life had been anything but since she went missing. He thrust his hands into his pockets and kept walking beside the wall. He felt uncomfortable in more ways than one. The suit felt tight, the shoes weren't broken in, the music too loud, and the only person who could make it enjoyable was all but declared dead by the police a month ago. He swallowed the lump in his throat and glared at the ground.
He could hear laughter and excited voices, dancing and toasting. How could they be so damn happy? When their Nakama was still missing? When search parties had given up? When he felt like he was tearing at the seams?
He stopped and looked out at them all. There was Lisanna at the front table – she really did make a beautiful bride. Her husband was – fuck - that guy from Blue Pegasus? What was his name?
They had said when they exchanged their vows and now he couldn't even remember - it had been hard for him to pay attention during the whole thing. Lucy would have yelled at him for forgetting the grooms name already... given how long they've all known him. He shook the thought away.
Whatever - he didn't really care what the guy's name was. Lisanna was happy – that's what mattered. His lip twitched and he swallowed hard.
He could have had a celebration like this. Everyone toasting him and shit – telling him how lucky he was…his eyes scanned the dance floor.
She should have been here.
She wanted to be here.
When she heard of Lisanna's engagement she went out and bought the dress right away. Claimed he would keep her on non-stop missions and training so if she didn't buy one now, she'd never get one.
He whined about being forced along and made her promise to cook him dinner – but for him it was a win-win. Tasty meal and she would ask him to zip her up in the dressing room. Another sneaky way to touch her without her giving way to embarrassment.
She picked out a green dress, said it reminded her of his eyes. He didn't think his eyes were green – but if she did, then what could it hurt?
He remembered when she called him in to help zip it up; he feigned a heavy sigh and pushed through the dressing room curtain. She was holding her hair up and looking over her shoulder. The dress hugged her form like everything else she wore, but the neck line dropped lower than usual.
He approved, but kept his face bored.
He walked behind her and felt the material around the zipper, it was soft, "Natsu…"
She looked over her shoulder expectantly. He peaked beyond her and caught her reflection. Her neck stretched and the way she was turning gave her a distinct profile, her pink lips were slightly open, her eyes fixed on him…suddenly the way she was holding her hair and arching her back didn't appear so benign.
He felt hot.
"-The zipper?" He swallowed and yanked it up. She smiled at him and released her hair. It tumbled down in gold waves and he caught a whiff of her poppies and sunlight smell. He went to move back beyond the curtain, but she grabbed his arm.
"Look." He pulled his eyes back to the mirror. His heart thumped painfully. She looked nice – she always looked nice.
"This dress makes your eyes pop!" He scrunched his nose in disgust. What!? If she even tried to make him wear that dress, he'd tickled her till she peed.
She turned to him and brightly smiled. "We'll look good together!" When she had said that his chest had gotten warm and tingly, but now the memory made it crackle with ice.
Those little gems used to help him.
Used to get him out of the funk and back into pretending he was Natsu. Back to punching Gray and calling him a no-good Ice Princess, back to fishing with Happy, back to shrinking in fear from Erza and booing Gajeel off stage.
He needed those memories to feel warm. But the longer she was gone – the longer it took to find her…It seemed every day, thinking about her just hurt more and more.
Shrieks of laughter erupted around the bride and groom table, and he was embarrassed at how disgusted he was by it.
They were his Nakama. They share their joy and their tears. He should be sharing their joy now…not wishing they felt as hallow as he did.
Forget looking for Happy.
He had to get out of here.
He pushed through the dance floor towards the exit. He needed air.
He wasn't sure why he came here.
He couldn't stand the sight of it.
He brought a hand to the cold stone and sat down across from it.
After the announcement from the police that Lucy was presumed lost for good and there were no means of breaking into the US M.G. dimension…
Levy and Mira had made her a grave.
They told everyone in the Guild about it except him – maybe trying to save him, maybe trying to save themselves from his wrath.
He read the front of it.
'Lucy of Fairy Tail'
She wouldn't have wanted this… He glared and shook his head.
She doesn't want this! She's not dead!
He growled at himself. It was so easy to forget, especially when you're staring right at it.
He tore his eyes away and looked up. The moon was high tonight and the stars dully glowed. This wasn't her favorite kind of night – she preferred when the stars illuminated the night sky and she could point out her spirit's constellations. He looked at her 'grave' again.
Levy asked everyone to write her a letter and that's what they buried.
What was even the point? How was she supposed to read them when she came back? Didn't they think of those things?
He sighed.
He had searched. They all had. He trusted the other Dragon Slayer's noses, but he knew, he just knew she was still out there somewhere. He wasn't sure why she hadn't found her way back…but maybe she just lost some of her memory. One of the Mages hadn't even known she had kids – ten years just up and gone. They were able to restore it…it seemed like the greater the amount of memory cursed; the easier it was to dispel it. Not that it was easy – it took several healer mages to remove it.
What was so damn annoying though was that no matter what – no mage recalled being taken. It seemed the binding curse on that particular memory was especially strong. No one could crack it – and all sorts of kinds were coming out of the wood work to try.
It just didn't add up!
Why take Celestial Mages but leave their keys? Why drain them of magical energy? Why return them completely healed? Why erase their memory? Why go to all that damn effort? And why seven months of nothing?! As far as he could tell - the rest of Earthland seemed fine. It was just his world that was shattered.
He roared. He was sick of questions! He just wanted to find the right person to burn the answers out of.
He smelled the grass by his feet singeing.
Erza's wedding would be next.
Lucy had bought dress for that one too. He put his head in his hands and leaned forward.
He wasn't supposed to…he was supposed to be strong…and playful and happy….He was supposed to be their fountain of optimism.
But he missed Lucy.
The tears fell hotly down his face.
Was she safe? Was she hurting? Was she looking up at the stars right now, wondering the same about him?
Was this fucking stone and buried letters all he'd get to keep of her?
It wasn't fair! He wiped harshly at his eyes and threw his foot forward – kicking the headstone from where it stood.
He heard it thud some distance away – he breaths came in short pants and he stood up.
Fuck it all.
He threw off his suit jacket and tore at his shirt – so what if he looked like a pervert like Gray…these clothes weren't him. He kicked off his shoes and shucked his slacks.
Moping around some empty hole in the ground wasn't him either.
He had done it briefly when Lisanna died and he decided then, he'd never do that again.
His fist glowed with fire and he thrust it into the ground – again and again – going deeper, until finally he felt the thunk of hitting wood.
He grasped the box they buried and threw it up onto the grass, and followed it out of the hole.
Those idiots.
How was Lucy supposed to read all the nice things they wrote if they buried them six feet deep?
He grabbed the box and carried it over one shoulder and walked in the direction of home, a breeze reminded him that he had taken off all his cloths barring his scarf and boxers.
He grinned – Lucy would be freaking out if she saw him – probably screaming about 'when did you become an exhibitionist?-or something like that.'
He picked up his pace to a jog – he didn't need to get arrested for running through town mostly naked.
He'd have to tell her about this when she got home. They could share a laugh about how the Guild jumped the gun and she could read all the nice things they wrote aloud.
His face held a fanged grin and he took off to a sprint. This was the kind of thing Lucy could put in her book – she loved these kinds of funny twists.
He neared the little house by the river and leapt into the open window. He landed and took a big inhale.
It smelled like him.
He frowned.
Her smell had gone stale not even a month after she was taken – they had been gone for six months before that after all.
He set down the box and went into the bathroom to wash his hands. She'd kill him if he got mud on her bed.
It wasn't like her smell was totally gone. When he wasn't out searching for her – he'd spend a day or two at her apartment looking for places that still smell of her. A worn bra behind the bed, an unwashed sweater, even some overly used boots – still sort of smelled like her.
He went to flip the lights off when gold caught his eye.
Her keys.
When had he moved them to the bathroom? He slowly reached for them and rolled the cold metal items in his hand.
He brought it to his nose and sniffed. It smelled metallic. He should know better. They only smelled like her for thirty-four days after she was taken...then the smell gave way to cold metal objects. Even still...he couldn't help trying every time. Her keys...were her - a part of her anyway...
He licked his lips and brought them to his face again. His mouth twitched. He gave them a chaste kiss. The metal was cold against his mouth.
I miss you.
He put them back on the counter and turned off the light. He bounded from the bathroom onto the bed.
The bed wasn't the same without her…but he had to remember - it wouldn't always be like this. Soon enough, he'd find her and then they could go back to the way it was-
No. He'd make it better. He'd make it right. No more waiting – he wasn't giving up on Igneel…but losing Lucy. He couldn't wait anymore, what they had before wasn't good enough.
He wanted more.
He stared determined at her ceiling. She had wanted more too, he was sure of it. His nose didn't lie. When he found her, it wouldn't be like before – it'd be better.
He felt eyes on him. He stretched and yawned in the morning light. He took a tentative whiff to place his guests.
Gray and Erza.
He cracked an eye at them. His stomach dropped nervously.
Erza was rubbing her chin thoughtfully with a strange look on her face staring at the box, and Gray was holding the clothes he shed at the fake grave.
He caught his stare and waved his pants at him, "Who knew you had it in you Flame-Brain?" he smirked.
It looked forced. Natsu frowned and sat up, suddenly conscious he was in his underwear, but all the same, not really giving a damn.
"Natsu…" Why did Erza sound so weird?
"Erz-" He was cut off by a hug. His eyes widened. He heard Gray drop the clothes he was holding and suddenly felt him hugging him too.
His eyes bugged – and he struggled to speak. What had gotten into them?
"I am sorry you found it. You may strike me now." she muttered quietly.
"…We just. Wanted to cope – I'm sorry…" Gray's voice sounded tight.
Oh. They felt guilty about the Lucy's fake grave.
Natsu laughed and pushed them off. Both stood back uncertain and sporting small blushes.
"Don't worry about." He said waving them off.
"I just thought it was stupid. Sorry for destroying the marker…but honestly, how did you expect Lucy to get those letters you wrote if you just left them in the ground." He brushed past them to use to restroom.
He missed their pained looks and the glance they exchanged behind his retreating form.
-Up in the air on whether to do a Flora or another Natsu next...
Leaning towards a quick Flora and then a long Natsu.
Anyway, thanks for reading!
-Till next time!
-UM