She waits until the door closes, then and only then does she roll on her side and bring his pillow to her face. She inhales in scent relishing in the fact that she can smell him again she brings the pillow to her chest and holds on to it closely hugging it for all she is worth. Listening carefully she hears them all go down the stairs it is then she feels safe enough to cry. Cry for what she knew deep down in her being could never be.
It is the ring of her cell that makes her sit up and clear her throat. "Hello."
"Hi Hope. Are you going to help make mommy's present?" Little Greg asks enthusiastically.
"Yes Greg just like I said I would later on this afternoon. I'll be down in a little while okay I have to do a few things first." she tells him sweetly before she closes the cell.
After showering and getting dressed, in khaki skirt and a light blue blouse she completes the outfit with a cream colored scarf around her neck. Penelope starts to help where she can she knows that the team is used to hotels with fresh sheet everyday. But this isn't how Millie runs things so she goes from to room and makes the beds except for JJ and Emily's theirs were made. Then she grabs all of the towels and tosses them down the laundry shoot.
It is just after eight when she enters the kitchen and sees that the team is still there.
"What are you doing up? I thought you were going to sleep in? Well at least I told you to stay in bed." Morgan says to her
"To much to do can't waste the day away." She replies as she pours hot water over a tea bag.
"I made all your beds you'll all have fresh towels by the time you go to bed tonight if your still here. It's not a hotel Millie has machines in the basement for the college students to use while they are here so no fresh sheet for you tonight."
"I didn't even think of that, thank you Garcia." Hotch tells her. "I'm assuming that the machines are pay as you go, I'll reimburse you."
She nods her head in acknowledgment. "Why are you still here and not out chasing bad guys."
"Waiting for the lab to call us back and for the results from the autopsy, Kitten"
"Oh would you like some help getting the information faster?"
"If you're willing then yes, we would love your help, we are having trouble with the tech from the BUA as well." JJ informs her.
Penelope smiles hearing this. She has always known that some of the other techs were lacking in their ability to get the information as fast as the agents needed it.
"I'll have to get my laptop two are better than one."
"I'll go get it baby girl you finish your tea and eat something please."
In all good conscious she just can't leave the breakfast mess for Millie to clean. So after she finishes her bowl of cereal she starts to gather all the dishes from the table. Seeing what she is doing the rest of the team pitches as well each doing their part soon the entire kitchen is as spotless as it was before they all came down to eat.
With fresh cups of coffee in hand they set up in the spacious dinning room. Having its advantages of more room better lighting and privacy.
They watch as she sets up the two laptops plus the one from NCIS and then the printer that they had brought with them. So busy in her tasks that she misses the silent communication that the agents are having. With a nod of Hotch's head he gives his order that Rossi has the lead. They need their tech back and if they can get passed her defensive walls and find out why she left they might have a chance.
"So why Hope, Kitten?"
"You were all looking for Penelope Garcia, not Hope Garcia, no paper trail."
"That's just." JJ starts to say.
"Smart. I was doing nothing illegal so no red flags went up."
Hotch looks at her and folds his arms across his chest with his best glare he starts in on her too. "Millie told us you were hurt saving a child. What we all want to know is why in the hell did you go back into that building?"
"I want an answer to that to, you could have been killed!" Morgan tells her adding his glare as well.
"Are we really going to do this? Now?"
"We have time Garcia the unsub is keeping a schedule and if he keeps to it we have five days until the strikes again."
"Reid." Emily says in a chastising tone.
She looks at eight of them and frowns. "Okay you win. I know you well enough to know that I've lost before I even start."
"Good girl." Gibbs says softly.
'Last month his mother went into early labour she lost the baby she was hemorrhaging so badly, well they saved her life but now she can never had any more children. So you see that little boy just had to live. Any one of you would have done the same."
"We understand why, but you really should have waited Penelope." Tony tells her gently.
"Couldn't take the chance Tony that little boy was the only thing that couple had left to live for."
"I'll have Ducky recommend a good plastic surgeon for you to see okay?." Gibbs tells her.
"No need Agent Gibbs, I'm staying the way I am, I have no one to impress or share my life with." she answers as she continues to work.
It took all Tony and Gibbs to stop Morgan from going to her. It was the look on his face that was unmistakable it was full of hurt and anger.
"Penelope, but you spent the night with Derek, all this time we have watched the two of you. We know that you love each other. We were all hoping that you two would finally get your act together, and stop being asses." JJ tells her.
Standing and holding her hands at her side her fingers curled in tightly. "Yes I love him. And yes he loves me. And yes we spent the night together we have in the past too, falling asleep together is just something we do. The only thing different was we kissed."
She looks at Derek and sees the hurt and anger in his eyes. "I never wanted to hurt you. I would give my life before I would hurt you, but you need someone else someone that is as beautiful as you are handsome. Someone that will help you with your career that can smoodge the right people for you. I can't do either for you too many people and I get flustered and I'll never be the beauty that you need to be seen with, all I can do is love you and try to keep you safe. Like I did for seven years."
No one said anything when she finished talking. Not even when Godfather came in with a gift that he laid at her feet. "I told you eat them. I don't like to eat mice Godfather." she tells the cat before she leaves the room taking the "gift with her."
"Hotch how can I make it better. I've told her that I love her and that I want her."
"She carries the hurt and the guilt of a lifetime with her. She was violently assaulted when she was underground, add that to her parents death. She is afraid Derek she is afraid of truly loving and receiving love in return. Lynch was safe and she knew that, he was a wimp not the alpha that you are the alpha that she needs. She doesn't know how to let go and let someone else take charge and make all the decisions. That is why she is so good with kids and people in general they trust her, she takes it all in and never lets it out. She adds their pain to hers. And keeps going."
"So how do I fix it and make her understand that she is the one that I want?"
"With gentle words, plenty of physical contact. Hug her hold her touch her hand, kiss her and not just on the forehead be kind and persistence." Rossi answers.
Gibbs slaps his head making him turn around and look at him. "Just don't hurt her."
"I won't. I love her too much to cause her any pain." Morgan responds
"JJ and I will help you with your campaign. I'm sure Spencer will too." Emily adds.
She is back within minutes, with the cat on her heels. They all watch as the cat jumped up onto the window sill he settled down folded his paws under his chin and stared at the group of agents intently.
"He looks like Rossi laying there watching us." Emily observes.
"That is why his name is Godfather." Penelope admitted with a chuckle. "He was a stray he came in one day and made himself right at home. We didn't have the heart to put him outside."
'The name fits him somehow." Hotch says as he tries to hide a smile.
"If you give me a list of the victims, I'll see if I can find what they have in common."