Chapter Thirteen
I'm breakin' down
Gonna start from scratch
Shake it off like an etch-a-sketch
My lips are saying goodbye
My eyes are finally dry
I'm not the way that I used to be
I took the record off repeat
It killed me but I survived
And now I'm coming alive
I'll never be that girl again
My innocence is wearin' thin
But my heart is growing strong
- Miss Movin On, Fifth Harmony
A week after the foam party, Enzo and Bonnie had managed to get things mostly back to normal. She hasn't pushed him about Stefan, and he hasn't pushed her about the way he felt. They were lying in bed after amazing sex in which he say all the things with their bodies that they can't say with their mouths because she's too frightened to face it or allow it.
Enzo ran his fingers through her hair; she's outlining the dragon on his arm. "Why the dragon? And why here?" she asks.
"I've always thought dragons were majestic and powerful. They can either represent destruction and horror, or good luck and fortune. I choose to see the side of life that offers good luck and fortune."
"And why the arm?" she asks lazily.
"Because I thought the arm would showcase the badass scales best."
She laughed, her breath fluttering across his chest. "It does do that well."
"The only other spot was his back, but I didn't feel right about putting it there."
She glided her fingers from his arm to the tat on his side and rib with the cards, dice, and darts. "This one is easy. Because you love darts. And most games where you can win people's money."
"That," he said and pushes her hair off her neck, "and because everything in life is a gamble. Nothing is certain."
She lifts her delicate fingers from his skin as she thinks about that, and then moves to trace the words below his collarbone. "I think this one's my favorite."
"It is?"his voice was raspy and deep. They were supposed to go out to the Grill to see a band tonight, but he was fighting to stay awake.
"Uh-hm. Because it reminds me how you're aware that things you let in can hurt you, but you let them in anyway."
Enzo kinked his neck to look down at her. Did she say she admires him? Enzo thinks she did.
"Well, except for Stefan," she says almost as an afterthought, but it's like sandpaper across his nerves.
"Why do you have to keep bringing him up?" he growled.
She sits up. "I just think you're punishing him unfairly."
Enzo crawls out of bed and put his pants on. It doesn't stop. "I told you to drop it with him."
"Do you know he looked up to you when you guys were young? And you wouldn't give him the time of day. Still won't. You guys are brothers. You're not meant to hate each other."
She empathizes with his pains from what "he's done to him." But what about all the shit he had dealt with because of Stefan? It's almost as if she's putting Stefan's feelings above his. "Leave it, Bonnie," he said and walking out to take a shower. He was annoyed and want out of this conversation.
Enzo rubbed his cold hand from their icy glasses down Bonnie's bare arm and she looked at him startled. He hands her the Long Island she asked for, and she takes it with a smile before turning her focus back to the band. It's the same band who played when he and Bonnie came here their first time together.
Bonnie sways her hips to the music and rolls her shoulders to the harder beats, their earlier argument forgotten.
Enzo steps behind her and wrap one arm around her waist, moving with her.
The Grill got a good crowd tonight, and the bodies are building the heat. Bonnie pulled her hair over one shoulder and airs her neck. A small trail of perspiration glistens in the red glow from the stage lights above. He watches until it reaches the spot where her neck and shoulder muscles meet and blow along the wet line.
She shivers and pushes her body flush against his. They danced to a few songs, and then play a round of darts.
They were sitting at our table waiting for Sarah to bring another round of drinks when Stefan and Caroline walked over. "Hey," Caroline says.
Enzo glared at Stefan. "What the hell are you doing here?"
Bonnie squeezes his shoulder. "Enzo, that is so mean. This is a public place, Stefan is here with Caroline, and it would mean a lot to me if you were civil."
Anger spikes in him all over again. "Why do you have to keep pushing it, Bennett? I told you how I felt, but you just don't quit." he glances from her to Caroline and Stefan.
How'd they know he and Bonnie would be here? And if it was a coincidence, why come to his table?
Enzo locked eyes with Bonnie "You set this up, didn't you?" he was stunned by how betrayed he felt.
"I just thought you should at least give him a chance."
Bullshit. "After everything I told you, after all the times I told you how I felt about it all. You did it anyway?" She's pushed him too far this time, and he couldn't hold it back any longer. "What gives you the right? We are not together. Stop sticking your nose where it doesn't belong."
Bonnie's forehead creases in pain before her face flushes with anger. "You're right, Enzo." Her words are clipped and cold, a stark contrast to the heat radiating from her. She scoots off the stool. "We're not together and I had no right. I'm sorry." She snatches her purse from the table and turns to Caroline and Stefan. "Will you please take me home?"
"Of course," Caroline says like he was the bad guy here, and the three of them walk away from the table.
"Bonnie, wait."
She stops but doesn't turn around.
Enzo didn't know what to say. She wouldn't let him tell her how he felt, but he was supposed to allow her to fix the most broken part of his life? A part of him wants her to. For her to be the one who makes the broken things work. But not like this. Not when she insists on keeping things the way they are. He can't give himself to her if she won't accept his heart, let alone give him hers.
She marches away from him.
Enzo wanted to tell her to wait, but he was still at a loss for words. He got what he wanted; she won't try to push him about Stefan anymore.
Was it worth losing whatever part of her he had, though?
He wasn't sure it is.
She waited all weekend for Enzo to call her, but he didn't. Not even a text.
Okay, maybe he needs some time to cool down, chill, forgive her, whatever. She could deal with that.
Tuesday in class, she doesn't talk to Enzo. She wanted him to at least start the conversation, break the ice, something. But he doesn't. Class rolls by and he leaves without a peep.
Maybe she shouldn't have set up Stefan and Caroline to come to the bar, especially not after the argument she and Enzo had about him before they went. But the plan was already in motion by then. It's just … she knows it pains Enzo, and it doesn't have to. She knows how to fix it. It's more easily fixed than the situation with her mom. And maybe that's why she did it, to try to fix something painful somewhere.
Thursday class comes, and when she still doesn't acknowledge him first, Enzo sits in the back. That tiny action hurts so much. She was being petty and stupid, and she wanted to talk to him, but now she was really hurt. And now she didn't know how. Like a manageable situation has just flipped into unmanageable territory for her.
When Friday night rolls around and still no word from Enzo, she emails him her section of the class project so far. He still doesn't call, or even reply to the email. If he really cared, he would have called by now.
It hurts, so she tells herself it's no big deal, that she really doesn't care about him after all. It was just a rebound thing. A college fling. Everyone has one of those, right?
"Well," Caroline says, "if you're going to sit here and sulk instead of calling him, you might as well come to the party with me tonight."
"I'm not sulking."
Caroline eyes Bonnie, brows raised. "You so are. You've fallen for him hard."
"I have not." she was not sure who was trying to convince more—Caroline or herself. And because she's not sure, she had to go to the party and get out of here.
Despite everything reminding her of Enzo, she and Caroline had fun. They were dancing and drinking, hanging out like they haven't in awhile.
Klaus Mikaelson, Stefan's friend with him that night at the fountain, kept checking her out. He's very cute too. He has blue eyes with dark, long lashes. Plus, he wears shirts with collars. Which is so unlike Enzo, she was walking over to him to prove something to herself. That she's not in love with Enzo, that she doesn't need him. The whole time they've spent together was only two college kids having a good time.
"Klaus," she says sitting next to him.
"Bonnie," he says, grinning at her. He must've thought he'd have to come to her. Well, she's doing things a little differently tonight.
"What are you drinking?" Lame question, but it works.
"Jack and Coke. You?"
Enzo likes rum and Coke. Well, he likes a lot of drinks, but that's his favorite.
Enough about him. This is about Klaus. "Vodka and OJ." Which she hates, but it's getting her drunk, so whatever. Bonnie takes another sip and scrunch her face.
Klaus laughs. "You don't like it?"
"Uh-un."
"Come on." He stands and pulls her with him by her wrist. "Let's get you something else."
She follows him toward the kitchen and pass a group of guys playing quarters.
Klaus appraises the stash of liquor bottles. "What'll it be? Looks like there's Jack, tequila, vodka, gin, rum, and this bottle of," he holds it up to read the label, "raspberry Schnapps." He turns to her with an agreeable look, like the Schnapps is probably what she'd like best.
Bonnie didn't think mixing different liquors once you've started with one was a good idea, but she glances down the line of bottles and grab the tequila anyway.
"Attagirl!" Klaus says, surprised, and takes it from her. He grabs a cup, salts the rim, and pours the liquor. "Hmmm." He looks around the kitchen for what to mix it with and opens the fridge. "Ah! Perfect." He comes back to the counter with a bottle of lemonade. "Now this is called a Salty Chihuahua." He mixes the lemonade and grabs a lime, slicing, and squeezing it into the cup.
He hands it to her, grazing her fingers before letting go, and she takes a tentative sip. "It's good!"
"That was a popular one at the bar I tended during the summer."
She tilts her head at him. "You were a bartender?" Bonnie figured he'd work an office job. Not a bar.
"Sure. It was more money than anything else that would hire me for only the summer."
"So what other good drinks do you have up your sleeve?" she asked with a flirty smile.
He goes through each bottle and tells her the best stuff to mix with it. Some of the drinks take more than two ingredients, so she forget them real quick. But some sound pretty good, like the one he calls the Tropical Hooter. It has cranberry and pineapple juice, coconut rum, and melon liqueur. If she could remember all of this until next weekend, she'd make some for her and Caroline.
Bonnie engaged Klaus in conversation as much as she could without thinking about Enzo, laughing at his funny jokes, until he leans forward and kisses her.
She let him. It's like some kind of challenge she had with herself; if she could do this with Klaus, then she and Enzo were only a fling.
Klaus doesn't kiss nearly as well as Enzo does—but it's decent.
He pulls back and tilts his head over to the hall with the bedrooms.
She smiles and follows him.
What the hell was she doing?
Does she really want to do this?
Before she makes up her mind, Klaus opens the door and waits for her to step inside, closing it behind them.
His lips finds hers again and he backs them up to the bed. He lays her down and crawls on top of her, continuing the search of her mouth with his tongue. He's heavier than Enzo. They're about the same height.
Bonnie lets him kiss her neck and rub her chest, but when his hand slides up her shirt, it makes this all very real, and something she very much do not want to do.
At all.
What the hell was she thinking?
Bonnie pushes him off of her. "I'm sorry. I just … I can't right now." she pulls her shirt down and hustle out of the room.
She ran all the way back to the dorms. Stopping halfway there, she was winded, bent over and resting her hand above her knees. As her pulse pounds in her head from the blood and alcohol, it dawns on her.
"I really am in love with Enzo."
It takes him all weekend to cool off. To get over the fact that Bonnie finds it okay to meddle with his life but not be a real part of it, the fact that she seems to care more about Stefan's feelings than she does his.
By class on Tuesday, he was ready to talk to her again, but when she gives him the cold shoulder, He knows she's not ready to apologize. Because she never really did apologize. She said she was sorry before she stormed out, but it wasn't sincere. It wasn't a real coming together of minds or realization of the impact of her actions. She only said it to get out of there.
Thursday's class was more of the same, so he sat elsewhere. It hurts sitting next to her without her so much as looking at him. And it angers him that she's acting like he was the one who did something wrong, as if he was the one who should be apologizing. All he did was speak the truth.
On Friday, he finally heard from her. It's an email. Enzo opened it, anxious to put all of this behind them.
The email reads:
Here's what I have so far. When you get your section done, please email it back, and I'll proof it before sending it to Shane.
And that. Is. It.
Cold.
Brutal. Heart-rending.
She did the first half and fucking emailed it to him. Not a word about them, what she did, how was he doing, or anything.
It's too late to request a partner switch, but he was sure she would if it weren't.
She called him last night but didn't leave a message. Probably about the assignment anyway. If she needed something else, she would've left a voicemail.
He stayed in all day Saturday, working on the other half of this stupid damn paper.
Henry calls him around the time the sun goes down. "Hey, bro. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but someone's got to."
Shit. What now?
"Fuck, Henry." Enzo scratches his nails along the scruff of his chin. "Yeah, whatever it is, I'll hear about it eventually."
"Don't shoot the messenger and all that shit." He's stalling.
"Bonnie?" Henry has to know she's the only thing that would throw him off so easily.
"Yeah. She was at the Beta frat party last night. She and Klaus Mikaelson were flirting and drinking together, and the next thing I know, she's following him into one of the back bedrooms."
Enzo blinks.
Fucking shit.
This is not happening.
Enzo swallows deep. "Do you know how long they were in there?"
"No, but a while later, Klaus comes out, so they didn't leave at the same time."
Typical for when you don't want people to know what you've been doing and with whom. "And you saw this? With your own eyes?"
"Sorry, man." That's the answer.
A fucking punch to the gut is what it is. "Well, I appreciate hearing it from you."
"Yeah, hit us up later if you want to go out."
"Sure," Enzo replies, but he was not going anywhere. He felt like shit.
Enzo can't fucking believe it. He thought he'd give her time to cool off. To think about how much she really cares about him.
Bonnie wasn't one to sleep around. What she did with him was a fluke. She either really didn't care about him, or she wanted so badly to sever herself from him that she'd go and fuck Klaus. And that hurts more than the fact that she slept with someone else.
Enzo didn't realize it until now, but he had kept himself celibate, waiting for Bonnie to come back. And for what? To find out that within a week of them not talking, she's already fucking a new guy?
Bullshit.
He called Valerie.
"Well, hey there, dar'lin'," she purrs. "I haven't heard from you in a while."
"Yeah, I've been busy. What are you doing next weekend?"
"Nothing yet. What do you have in mind?"
"I'll be over Friday night. Wear the purple one I like." he hung up, trying to ignore the fact that even though Valerie looks fucking hot in that lavender bra, panty, and garter number, she looks nowhere near as amazing as Bonnie did when she was soaked from the rain that day of their bike ride.
But Bonnie made her choice last night.
And it sure as shit wasn't him.
AN: 3 more chapters left. Thanks for everyone for reading this. Also if you haven't already check out my latest Bonenzo fic Dreaming of You which is heavier on the Bennett women, and explorer Enzo St John. That has a bit of a supernatural element and adult romance, so check it out.