Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

A/N: Huge thanks for the reviews. Things are going to start picking up soon, promise. Anyway updates will be every saturday so that I have time to get the chapter's written and checked.

Happy reading :P

xxx

Time to tell the truth to the first human I had ever told it to.

My palms were sweating and I could feel my heart racing in my chest at the dive I was about to take into the unknown. The human psyche was an unpredictable thing. I was hoping that Renee would surprise me in her reaction; maybe she wouldn't run in fear screaming about insanity.

I knew the risks were high and if I was to consult a betting shop I was almost certain that they would place the odds of her understanding, as a far outside chance.

But there was something in me that compelled me to trust this woman and bet on the unlikely. Even if the price I may have to pay could end up being my life and the way it was now.

"Renee, can you believe that there are things in this world that can't be explained? That science cannot tell us everything about this world?" Renee looked in shock at my heavy words and she eased herself onto the bed with her hand locked in Bella's as she sat beside the crib.

"I think so" I couldn't think about the uncertainty in her voice. If I did I would back out of my decision.

I knew it had consequences if I told her but I couldn't find a way of creating a story that would explain everything.

I was tired. I was only a child and I wanted to have a moment when I didn't have to be an adult. I wanted to be naive and believe for one second that I could spill everything and it would be alright. That the adult in the room would pat me on the back and tell me everything would be fine.

Renee was sitting impatiently on her bed, her foot tapping wildly on the floor.

"Renee, I'm going to tell you my story but I need you to promise me something first. You cannot tell a soul. I have to trust that you will keep this to yourself no matter what." I was almost willing her to with my eyes. The need for secrecy burning through my irises.

Her eyes dazed over and she nodded silently.

"My parents really did die 3 years ago now. I was 9 years old and in my time there was nothing that could be done for a child that age. The orphanage was the only option. I lost everything except this locket" I stroked the locket that still lay on my chest just below the fabric shield of my t shirt.

"What do you mean your time?" Renee was already confused and the story had only just begun.

"Remember the promise you have made Renee." I sighed closing my eyes to prepare myself for the first onslaught of questions.

"I was born 13th October 1901 in London England. My father was an accountant and he gave me and my mother the best life we could have wanted. Then when they died I lost everything I had known in my life. Even time itself." I could remember that night so clearly. The extreme tension in me and the feeling of drowning in time itself.

"It's not possible! Your just 12 years old. 1910 is 79 years in the past! You must be mixing up the dates. There is no way. No way!" Renee was pacing the room and I could hear Bella becoming anxious, her soft whimpers at the noise her mother was making.

I walked towards the crib and gently picked up the small little girl. Her chocolate eyes locked with mine and her whimpers soothed almost in an instant.

Renee was too busy pacing at the information I had told her, to notice Bella's reaction to her distress.

I swayed her back and forth before Renee finally came over to me and took her from my arms. Clutching her a little closer than usual.

She thought I was dangerous.

"What makes you think I would let you near my baby when you're quite obviously mad. That would explain that dress" Renee rocked her and her child as she eyed the top of the dress draped out of my sack.

"I can explain it all Renee. If you would just let me" I put everything in my being into begging for her patience and open mind.

"I'll listen to you Sarelle but if your answers don't clear my questions I'm calling the police, It isn't safe for someone like you to be out in public. Not healthy...." She was cold but calm in her comment. I knew deep down she would be in turmoil, just as I had been when I first jumped.

"The night after my parent's funeral something happened. I can't explain what exactly. It's still not clear to me. All I know is that it changed everything. One second I was in my dark little room, the next I was in London England, 1640."

Renee gasped and I smiled. I knew how unbelievable it would sound. Like some kind of science fiction story conjured up by an imaginative author to play in people's minds, and make them question time and space for just a moment before moving on.

"Anyway I met a wonderful man called Carlisle. His father was a pastor and they took me in for months. I didn't feel comfortable staying without doing what I could so I cooked and cleaned, and I was happy in that strange new reality. Though I must say 1640 was not the most hygienic of times" Renee smiled slightly in her puzzled daze.

"Everything was simple but perfect till the night Carlisle died." My voice broke a little at the memory of the fateful night Carlisle was bitten.

Renee shifted in her seat and I could see she wanted to comfort me but she didn't. The possibility that I was insane was stopping her.

"It was a few days after Carlisle's death that I jumped again this time to a park in Chicago. The date was springtime 1905. It was here that I met the Masen's" I smiled at the memory of when I first met Edward.

His bright little smile.

He had said I was an angel even in my dirty, unkempt state.

I passed my smiling eyes to Renee and I could see tears welling up in her.

"Don't worry. The Masen's helped pick me up from the loss of Carlisle. They had a son, he was only 4 years old but he was the brightest little boy. I loved them so much. But I knew I couldn't stay with them. There was something that always seemed to be pulling me away from the people and places I loved. However it let me stay with them for a few months. That's why I have a picture of them. They meant so much to me. I didn't want to risk forgetting them. Not ever." My voice was distant as I remembered my times with the Masen's.

The walks in the park as Elizabeth and Edward Snr watched me and their son laughing and playing together. To any outsider we would have looked like a normal family except for my obvious difference in appearance.

Even though I had only known them for a few months they never once acted cold or reserved. Every moment with them was filled with a warm fuzzy feeling that filled me from the inside out. Of all the places I had been, I hadn't experienced that feeling of belonging.

Renee had crossed the room to pick up the picture I had of them to look at it, examining the evidence to clarify my story so far.

"They look very happy"

"They were. They were the perfect family and for a short while I was part of it"

"But you left again?" Renee seemed to be getting the hang of it and was sitting with Bella looking at me like a child looks at a teacher during story time, inquisitive and anticipating what the next words will reveal.

"I never have a choice when I leave. I just get overcome by something that just takes me away. I've learnt to live with it. Tame the force that controls when I jump, not that I ever choose where or when to. My next jump confirmed that."

"The asylum" Renee whispered in understanding and I nodded.

"I was 10 years old when I jumped into a pitch black room. I had everything I owned with me but that didn't stop me from being terrified. Then I met Mrs Mills. Never have I met a woman with such a mean spirit" I shuddered at the memory.

"However Mrs Mills wasn't enough to completely ruin my life. One of the patient night wardens, Aslo, befriended me and he eased the misery of that place. I won't tell you the horror stories. Partially because I can't. They would hurt too much to recount. All I can say is that I spent 10 months in that place. But I did meet some interesting people so I guess that could be a positive" I laughed lightly but it wasn't real. Renee could hear it, emotion read all over her face. Pity and I hated it.

"Anyway I was given the chance to say a proper goodbye to Aslo and Mary. It was Aslo that gave me that book actually. The one you have obviously perused through"

Renee blushed at being caught out.

"He's a very good artist. Very intriguing images" I nodded in agreement with Renee's comment. She didn't need to know that the reason he was those things was because he wasn't limited by mortality and human abilities.

"Where did you go next?" Renee was really getting into my story and I wondered if she really understood it and comprehended what I was telling her.

"DeSoto Texas. 1843. The civil war was on the doorstep but that didn't stop the little town from being a happy and carefree place. I stayed in a tavern and soon made friends with the owner's daughter. She of course was positively smitten with the major of the confederate soldiers that were stationed there. He was such a charmer" I giggled at the memory of Jasper in his uniform and how he had kissed my hand when we first met.

"I became close friends with the major and a couple of his soldiers. They were very kind to me and Katelyn. They would talk with us even though we were only young girls."

I got up to wander about the room before I decided whether or not to tell her the next part of my story. Did she need to know about Ashton? Did I want to unlock that memory?

No.

"Unfortunately after only a few months and my 12th birthday the federal army descended upon the little town and Katelyn and I were forced to walk the 290 miles across the Texan soil from DeSoto to San Antonio. I only left with Katelyn so she would be safely delivered to her aunt and uncle where she would wait for her parents. I could tell I would have to leave her soon and it was only seconds after she closed the door that I jumped again. I was just glad I had been given the opportunity to say goodbye to Major Jasper Whitlock and Mr Dale Jameson. To be able to give them a thank you for everything."

I sighed I was coming to the end of my story so far.

"Finally I came here and I was forced to try and adapt to this strange future."

Renee sat stunned whilst Bella played with her hair, pulling it now and again.

"What does it feel like?" Renee's voice told me she had a lot of questions and I prepared myself to answer as many as possible.

"It feels like I'm falling apart into the atmosphere. Like a force reduces me to nothing but particles in the air. But don't be alarmed. I never feel anything. It used to be like an overwhelming tension but now I just feel a tingle run over my body. I know I exist but my body doesn't seem present to me"

"I can't imagine the sadness of having to leave the people you become close to. I would hate to have the feeling of never being able to settle" Renee was stroking Bella's dark mahogany hair as she slept peacefully in her arms. That girl would never have to experience anything but loving stable normality. She wouldn't be forced into a life that exists outside the realms of science or known reality.

Baby Isabella would grow up to go to school, have regular friends, have a caring family, go to university, meet someone, get married, have children, grow old with her husband.

How could I have any of these things?

Realistically.

I could grow up but I could never really experience the life I wanted so badly.

I could never experience an ordinary, normal, run of the mill life. Where the only problems I encountered were small blips in the smooth road.

"It isn't easy but I have learnt to deal with it. Treat life as one big adventure" I replied to Renee's comment.

"May I ask how you have managed to accept all this with such a calmness about you?" It didn't make sense for Renee to be sitting on her bed holding Bella with a look of inquisitive understanding on her face.

"I'm not sure. I just feel like I believe you. It might not be rational but it's just what I feel."

"No screams of insanity? Mrs Mills certainly did" I grimaced and Renee shook her head but I could see the sympathy behind her watery blue eyes.

With that shake of Renee's head I felt the weight of everything fall from me. I had finally told someone who was considered to be normal about my life and it felt like a strange mix of being light as a feather but having a ball and chain wrapped round my ankles.

I was happy that I had told Renee and that she had accepted what I had told her. However now I had the weight of knowing she knew everything. I had the worry of what would happen if she let slip of my secret.

I couldn't risk the exposure. If word got out I would either be condemned as insane and watched round the clock or celebrated as a freak, forever to be tested on in laboratories. That is until I jumped again because no one could hold me forever. Neither option was a pleasant idea to contemplate so that was the reason for the gravitational pull stopping me from enjoying the feather light feeling.

Renee placed Bella in the crib and came over to where I sat.

"Could I maybe see some of your stuff? I would love to see the clothes they wore back in 1910" Renee was beaming at me like a child at Christmas, waiting for me to open my sack and spill all the surprises out of it.

I leant over and pulled out my favourite dress that Elizabeth had bought me. It was a wonderful forget-me-not blue with white ruffles on the ½ length sleeves and it belled out just below my knees, swishing as I walked. It made me feel like a classic little girl.

"Sarelle it's beautiful!"Renee gasped and held the dress out to watch it move as she swung it back and forth through the air.

"Me and Mrs Masen, Elizabeth, bought it one day in Chicago around late May time. The shop was full of beautiful dresses and ribbons I was ecstatic just looking at them. I hadn't seen anything so lovely in nearly 8 months since I was with Carlisle. When Elizabeth told me I could have one... I can't explain how much that meant to me. I wasn't her child but she treated me like a daughter. She was like my real mother in so many ways" I fiddled with my locket again and this time Renee noticed.

"Can I see inside it?" I opened the locket with a small bit of difficulty. I hadn't admired the picture in the locket for many months and the dust from travelling to San Antonio had effected the ease at which the hinges moved.

As soon as the locket was opened I saw the happy faces of my parents smiling up at me and it was like being taken back to the day before they left me with the nanny.

They were excited to be travelling to Southend-on-sea. Apparently there had been a ball they were attending and my mother was excited to socialise. Her soft green eyes were shining when she kissed me goodbye whilst my father looked down on us smiling.

They were always so happy.

I drifted off into the memory of their departure.

"My darling Sarelle, promise to behave yourself for Shannon. No bedtime antics, ok?" My mother was bent in front of me with her silvery blonde hair piled upon her head in the latest fashion of intricate curls whilst delicate wisps trickled around the edge of her face. She was, to me, the most beautiful woman in the world and I was filled with pride that she was my mother.

I bent my head and she stroked her hands through my hair before placing a motherly kiss upon the top of my head. I looked up beaming as our eyes locked and her pastel green eyes melted into mine with maternal affection. The expression on her face showed her excitement of the coming journey and event.

My nanny Shannon was to care for me whilst my parents travelled the 3 hours through the countryside that sat outside our London suburb of Hampstead.

It wasn't the first time I had been left with the nanny and so this routine of saying goodbyes in the hallway was well rehearsed. I kept a quiet smile on my lips to hide the discomfort I felt whenever I watched my mother and father walk out the door, leaving me behind.

My mother stepped away and talked to Shannon whilst my father came and swooped me up in his arms. Our laughter tinkled through the hallway as he tickled my sides and swung me round through the air.

"Now my little Sarelle, you be a good girl and don't go having too many adventures without me" He winked and placed a firm kiss on my cheek before propping me back down on the solid wooden floor.

"I love you, father"

"I love you too, Sarelle. But we'll be back before you know it. Remember don't..."

"... waste time being sad, because you can't get it back" I finished his warm brown eyes twinkled and the golden fire in them shone brightly with his pride. I was his little girl and every moment we spent together was saturated with his love of his family.

"Always remember my sweet little girl.

'Time is free, but it's priceless.

You can't own it, but you can use it.

You can't keep it, but you can spend it.

Once you've lost it you can never get it back.'"His eyes glimmered and the gold sparkled more than usual. He loved that quote and had repeated it to me several times as I grew up. He had always taught me to never regret anything that I do because otherwise it would just be wasted time.

I smiled warmly at him and gave him a tight hug as I replied "I'll never forget, father"

He stroked my cheek and I stepped away back to the banister on the stairs as I watched him as he turned to my mother and impatiently ran a hand through his dark brown wavy hair.

"Lily, we really must be leaving if we are to get there before dark"

My mother hurriedly finished her instructions to Shannon and spun to hold my father's hand as they made their way out to the carriage.

"Honestly, Adam, It's now only 12 o'clock and Southend-on-sea is only a 3 hour carriage journey. We have plenty of time."

Her vivid red dress was cut in the latest fashion of creating the ideal hour glass figure, and swayed gracefully around her ankles revealing the pale golden slipper shoes that she wore to match the gold and pearl necklace and earrings.

She looked a vision in all her finery and her outfit subtly suggested the wealth that we lived in.

"Yes my lovely Lily, but I intend to spoil you with lots of pretty things" I heard his faint voice from outside and saw my father as he smiled widely at my mother before she entered the carriage in front of him.

Shannon and I waved them off from the front door and like always I soaked up the remnant feeling of family that they had left behind. The warmth of their hugs and love in their kisses, I held on to all of it so that I wouldn't miss them whilst they were gone.

"You look a lot like your mother, Sarelle." Renee's voice shocked me away from the memory that still haunted me with the love and happiness it still held in my mind. She rubbed my back and I sighed melting into her arms. I still remembered the warmth of their hugs and love in their kisses because it was everything I had left of them and it was all I could do to stop myself from spending my life in grief. I couldn't just fall apart because my situation was too complex for me to relinquish my strength to my emotions and drown in all the sadness that pooled under my surface.

The effect of telling my story to Renee was creeping up on me and all of a sudden I felt exhausted and I felt my eyes drooping whilst Renee carefully replaced my locket back into its rightful position resting on my chest. She hummed the simple melody of Clair de Lune and I felt myself slip over the edge into a peaceful sleep. At some point I felt her movement as she shifted my body so I was in my bed.

She would be a good mother to Bella, when she really needed it. Renee may be a scatter brain on the surface but deep down I thought that maybe she possessed more logic than any other person I had encountered.

* * * * *

When morning came I woke to find the room empty and my possessions were neatly piled next to my bag.

Renee had tidied up after our talk.

The talk where I had revealed anything.

For a brief moment I wondered how long it had taken her to organise my things since she no doubt would have become distracted by each item and that would only have prolonged her process of cleaning up.

It was only a fleeting thought because the majority of my thoughts were aimed at how it was remarkable that I had managed to pour everything out of me and wake up to find nothing had changed.

She hadn't run away in the night with Bella like a normal person would have.

She hadn't called the police and had me taken away in my sleep to save her from living with a person who in an ordinary person's view would be considered insane.

She had done none of this and I had never been filled with more relief than I had in this moment.

A regular person finally knew about my secret and it hadn't lead to the traumatic cries of hatred I had expected.

I had survived yet another drama.