This is a MAJOR chapter of Motivation...

NOTE: There will probably be grammar mistakes which I will fix later.

Crunch! Crunch! Crunch!

Gaz grumbled as GIR continued to munch rather noisily on his toast. The energetic robot sat next to her on the couch and she couldn't concentrate on her game with all that noise.

And she was really starting to get P.O'd.

The other day, Dib brought GIR home after Zim supposedly kicked him out. The SIR unit was completely covered in dents and had one cracked eye. It took Dib nearly ten hours to repair him, and even Gaz had to admit that he did a pretty good job since the robot looked good as new. He even shined a little thanks to the wax work that Dib gave him.

But ever since he entered the house, GIR was a constant pain in Gaz's side, always following her around and drinking all of her soda. Just this morning she found him cuddled up at the end of her bed. The thought of him watching her sleep gave her the creeps.

GIR stopped eating for a moment and looked over at her. He smiled widely, revealing chewed up toast in his mouth, which was really disgusting. "HIIIII!" he shouted, spitting out bits of toast in the process. Some of it landed on the screen of her game, which blocked her view and cost her the level. Grinding her teeth and growling in fury, Gaz yelled for her brother at the top of her lungs.

"DIB!"

Immediately, Dib came running down the stairs and into the living room. "What? What's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" Gaz hissed as she pointed at GIR. "You letting Zim's robot stay here is wrong!"

"Come on, Gaz," Dib softy said as he walked over to GIR and gently patted him on the head, which made the robot let out a cute coo of contentment. "Have a heart, will ya? Zim beat the crap out of him and then kicked him out."

Gaz raised an eyebrow at him and scoffed. "And I should care because...?"

"Well, what do you want me to do? Just abandon him on the streets? He doesn't have anywhere else to go."

"He's really started to annoy me, Dib!" Gaz's eye twitched.

Dib sighed exasperatedly. "Look, I'll...figure something out, okay?"

"You'd better figure something out soon," Gaz said creepily, "or I'll make him into a toaster, and then he could have all the toast that he wants!"

"I like toast with some jam!" GIR shouted, his mouth still full.

"Fine! Fine! Sheesh." Dib went back upstairs, listening to GIR giggle madly at the Monkey sitcom that was on. He closed the door to his bedroom and sat down at his desk where his laptop was. He had been thinking about what to do with the now homeless robot. It was obvious that he was not welcomed here (but only because of Gaz's impatience with him, otherwise Dib would've gladly adopted him), so there were only two options left: talk Zim into taking back GIR or submit the robot to the Swollen Eyeball as the evidence he needed to prove that Zim was an alien.

After all, GIR's head was just full of alien data...and other random things such as sandwiches and salted nuts. GIR was his last chance to saving his membership, but he came to realize that he just couldn't bring himself to do it. The thought of the robot being dissembled by a bunch of scientist made him feel uneasy, so he ultimately decided not to resort to that option, which meant that he would have to go to Zim's house and confront him.

He knew that it wouldn't be easy, though. Chances were that he'd be torn limb from limb or incinerated by the emotionally unstable alien. He REALLY didn't want to go into that house, but GIR's life depended on it.

...

"Gaz, I'm going over to Zim's house," Dib announced as he headed for the door.

"You're gonna try and talk him into taking GIR back?" Gaz barely looked up from her game.

"Yeah, but I might not make it back," Dib shuddered.

Gaz smirked. "Yeah, I should be so lucky."

Dib tried to pretend that he didn't hear that and was about to turn the knob when he felt something tug at his trench coat. He looked down to see GIR looking up at him with sad cyan eyes.

"Mary," he said in a very quiet tone that was so unlike the robot, "will you tell Master I'm sorry? And I miss him?" He sniffled and wrapped his arms around Dib's waist.

Dib smiled warmly at the robot and patted his head. "I will, GIR. See you in a little bit." Or at least, I hope so.

Dib found it strange that the robot gnomes didn't attack him as he casually walked to the front door. Perhaps Zim forgot to turn the security system on?

"Hey, Zim?" he knocked on the door three times. When no one answered, he knocked again, only harder and louder this time. "Zim, you in there?" Again no one responded. Dib felt this sense of dread in his stomach for some reason. Something was wrong. "Okay, uh, I'm coming in, anyway. Don't...shoot me with a laser gun or anything. Okay, here I go."

He slowly opened the door and peeked his head in. It was very dark, and the only light in the room was coming from the television. He pushed the door some more and saw Zim sitting on the couch without his disguise on, staring at the screen. But there was a blankness in his ruby eyes, as though he was in some kind of trance. Was he even alive?

"Zim...?"

The alien slightly turned his head in the boy's direction and gave him somewhat of a smirk and a nod. "Dib," he said in a calm voice.

Dib was certainly not expecting the alien to just greet him in such a polite manner and let him walk right into his base. Yep, something was definitely wrong. "You, uh...how are you-how are you doing?"

Zim shrugged his shoulders. "Eh."

"Oh," Dib rubbed his arm and briefly glanced at the T.V. Man, this was totally awkward. "Anyway, I-I came to talk to you about GIR."

"I already told you, Dib," Zim calmly said as he looked down at his arm. "I don't want him anymore. Besides, he's better off living with you than he is with me."

"Actually, Zim, Gaz doesn't want him in our house," Dib explained. "She can't handle all of his...you know...craziness."

"Figure something out then," Zim said, his eyes still on his arm. "I don't care. In fact, I don't care about anything anymore."

Dib sighed and shook his head, a little annoyed by the way Zim was acting. "Zim, come on. I know you're still bummed about the whole Spleen thing, but you can't just-" He then noticed something on Zim's arm. It looked like some kind of arm brace with words written on it. He squinted his eyes to read them.

The words read, "SELF DESTRUCT".

Self-destruct? Oh, god. "Zim..." Dib's voice quivered in fear, "what are you doing?"

For a moment, Zim said nothing and merely stared at the device on his arm, then he slowly lifted his head and looked straight into Dib's eyes, finalization and hopelessness in his own. "Leave now, Dib."

But Dib wouldn't move. "Zim, what are you doing?" he asked again, more sternly but still a bit shaky.

Zim looked back at the screen and rested his head against the pillows. He looked like he was just relaxing and watching a little T.V, but Dib knew better. "I just spoke with the Tallest," Zim said.

"Tallest? Oh, you mean your leaders."

Zim nodded. "I tried to convince them to let me leave the planet and return to Irk. I'm sick of this place, Dib. And I can't handle becoming attached to another Earth creature just to lose it to the cruel hand of death. But then they...they told me some things."

Dib waited for Zim to continue, but for a while, the invader said nothing else, so he urged him to continue. "What kind of things?"

Zim closed his eyes as he let out a heavy, disheartened sigh. "I'm a fraud, Dib."

"A what now?"

"The mission, the impending invasion of Earth...it was all a lie."

Dib couldn't believe his ears. This had to be a joke. "What...?"

"Turns out they sent me to this planet just to get rid of me. They hate me. They all hate me. I'm a disgrace to the Irken Empire." He opened his eyes again, which glistened with unshed tears. "My very existence is a lie."

Those tears in the alien's eyes proved that this wasn't a joke. What Zim was saying was true: Earth was never in any real danger. There was never going to be an invasion. So all those battles...all those crazy adventures and near-death experiences...they were all for nothing? Had Zim not have been contemplating suicide, Dib would've laughed.

Zim looked over at Dib again and waved at him to leave. "So get of here, Dib, before you explode, too."

Dib shook his head. There was no way he was letting it end this way. "Zim, come on." He slowly approached Zim and reached a shaky hand out to him. "Just...put that thing away."

Zim smiled bitterly at him. "What's the matter, Dib? Afraid you'll lose your proof that aliens do exist?"

Dib couldn't help but chuckle in disbelief. "No, I just-"

"You have GIR, don't you? He's all the evidence you need. And if that's not enough, you can have whatever's left of me after I explode. I figured you'd dancing with joy at this point. So why aren't you dancing, Earth-smell?"

"Zim, put that device away," Dib tried again, trying to show Zim that he was being serious about not wanting him to explode. "It doesn't have to end like this."

Zim was somewhat surprised by Dib's apparent concern. But he merely scoffed and positioned his finger over the button. "Yes, it does."

Dib froze as the finger hovered over the button. He gulped and took a daring step forward. "No, Zim, it doesn't. Just because your leaders say you're garbage doesn't mean that you actually are. People have been saying that I was crazy my entire life, but I know I'm not crazy. You're not gonna let a couple of tall jerks tell you how to live your life, are you?" He was hoping that Zim would be convinced.

But unfortunately, he wasn't. "You're not going to change my mind, Dib. I will press this button, whether you're in here with me or not."

It was beginning to look hopeless, trying to save the alien from destroying himself. But Dib refused to back down. "You won't press it, Zim," he said with confidence. "At least, not while I'm still in the base."

Zim chuckled weakly, amused by the child's delusions and attempted bravery. "And what makes you think I won't?"

"You're not the same as you were when you first arrived, Zim," Dib softly told him. "You've changed. You're starting to value life, to see the beauty in it. Spleen was proof of that. And so were the butterflies."

Zim's eyes enlarged and his antennas went up in surprise. "Butterflies? You mean...?"

Dib smiled a little. "Yeah, I was there in the butterfly house that day. I saw you interacting with them. You may pretend otherwise, Zim, but you care. And if you still do, then you won't press the button and kill me." He took a deep breath, waiting for Zim's reaction.

Zim stared at him for a bit before he suddenly pulled his head back and laughed boisterously, which greatly confused Dib. The alien jumped off the couch and shook his head slowly. "Tsk, you poor, demented, delusional child."

Dib didn't like the sound of that.

"You really think it matters to me whether you live or die?" the alien continued. "Earth animals are one thing, but humans? I could care less about them. In fact, I truly believe that this planet would be better off without them polluting the air and water and filling up the lands with garbage. And you are no more special than they are, Dib. To me, you're just like any other human." He leaned in and smiled cruelly. "You mean nothing to me."

Those words stabbed Dib in the heart. He could almost feel the tears building up in his eyes. How could he had been so stupid as to believe that Zim would ever care about him, even just a little bit? He protected the alien from being burned to death by the rain and spared him at the butterfly house, and for what? Just to hear those cruel words and feel even more insignificant than he did before?

Zim pointed to the door behind Dib. "Last chance, Dib. Get out or die."

Dib sighed and started to head for the exit. What was the point anymore? Zim would never change, no matter how many acts of kindness Dib would show him. His hand touched the knob when the flashback of him and Zim playing with the paper airplanes suddenly appeared in his mind. Then came the image of Zim handling the blue Morph butterfly with such gentleness. And then he remembered the way Zim protectively hugged Spleen, declaring that he would protect the fox from any harm.

He pulled his hand away from the knob. No, he wasn't about to give up on Zim, not when the alien was finally beginning to see the beauty in Earth and give up his destructive ways. He had one more idea.

He turned around and faced Zim, trying to look sad and defeated. "Okay, Zim, I'll go. But before I do..." He held out his hand. "How about a handshake?"

Zim raised an invisible eyebrow. "Handshake?"

"Yeah," Dib cleared his throat. "I want us to part on good terms and not as enemies, you know?"

Zim looked at him suspiciously, and Dib could fear some sweat rolling down his forehead. He really hoped that the alien wouldn't catch on to what he was planning to do. But Zim finally nodded with a grunt.

"Very well, Dib," he walked over to where Dib stood and reached to shake. "You were a worthy rival and an admirable adversary."

"Yeah, likewise," Dib muttered, his eyes still locked on the self-destruct device on Zim's other arm. His heart pounded as Zim got closer. It was now or never.

As soon as that gloved hand grabbed his, Dib swiftly flipped Zim onto his back and sat on his stomach, pinning him to the floor. The alien screamed all kinds of profanities and struggled to get up as Dib fiddled with the explosive device. The boy winched as he felt Zim scratch at his back with his other hand, but he focused only on the device and tried to find the switch to deactivate it.

At one point Zim painfully tugged at Dib's hair scythe, causing him to yelp in pain and let go of Zim's arm. Once the alien was freed, he shoved Dib off and pushed him against the T.V. The impact of Dib's head smashing into it caused the screen to crack. Disoriented and seriously hurt, Dib slumped to the ground and clamped a hand over his bleeding forehead. He groaned in pain as he felt blood slip through his fingers.

Breathing heavily and infuriated, Zim stepped onto Dib's chest and pinned him down. He leaned down to sneer in Dib's face. "You had the chance to leave, Dib," he hissed. "But now you'll die along with me." He prepared to push the button to self-destruct, glaring down at the human child.

But instead of fear, Dib felt righteous indignation flow through his veins. Gritting his teeth, he defiantly gripped Zim's boot on his chest. "So you got screwed over!" he spat. "SO WHAT?! Not everyone who does gives up, you know! There are people who keep moving forward and get on with their lives! I just...I just can't believe you're giving up this easily, Zim! You NEVER give up!"

Zim's glare faded and his antennas sank back sadly. He sighed and shook his head. "That was back when I believed I actually meant something. But now I know the truth: Zim is nothing. No one cares about me. I am alone in the universe." He closed his eyes and put the tip of his finger on the button. He was about to push it and end his miserable, lonely life when Dib's voice stopped him.

"God, you're so stupid, Zim."

Zim opened his eyes and looked down at the child in surprise. Even in the face of death, Dib still defied him and continued to fight. Zim was genuinely impressed.

"You whine and complain about being alone and nobody liking you," Dib continued, still glaring up at Zim, "but you just don't get it, do you? You and I are both alone, Zim. The only difference between us is that you had people who cared about you but you drove them all away. I'm alone because nobody cares about me. But you don't see me wallowing in self-pity and wanting to kill myself, do you?!"

He tightened his grip on Zim's boot, angry tears forming in his eyes. He could feel warm blood sliding down the side of his face, but soon that wouldn't matter anymore, right? Because it was the end for both of them. "But if you think it's too hard, then go ahead! Push the button! We'll BOTH go out with a bang! You said it, yourself! I'm an insignificant human! No one will miss me after I'm gone! AM I RIGHT?! SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! PUSH IT!" Dib's voice cracked as he screamed, the tears now running freely down his cheeks.

For what seemed like an eternity, he lay there, waiting for the alien to push the button. But Zim only stared down at him, and he eventually put his arm down, though the self-destruct device was still there. Dib thought he saw a flicker of hope in Zim's ruby eyes for a moment. Could he had finally gotten through to him?

Zim lifted his leg off Dib's chest, allowing him to sit up. He sniffled and wiped his nose and eyes with the sleeve of his coat. He felt so embarrassed about crying in front of his former enemy. But at the same time, he was greatly relieved that Zim decided not to end both of their lives.

"Dib," Zim spoke in an uncharacteristically soft tone, which really surprised Dib and he looked up at the alien with red puffy eyes. "Are you one of those people who...care about Zim?"

Before he would've denied it in a heartbeat, but he was just so relieved and happy to be alive that he smiled at Zim tearfully and nodded his head. "Yeah, Zim," he croaked, not feeling the slightest bit embarrassed to admit it. "I do."

Zim frowned and tilted his head a bit. "But...I thought we were..."

Dib laughed and wiped his eyes again. "Yeah, I used to really hate your guts. But things are different now. And...as it crazy as it sounds...you're the closest thing to a friend I ever had. Sick, right?"

The corners of Zim's lips slowly lifted and he chuckled weakly. "Indeed." Finally the self-destruct device disappeared and Zim sat down on the floor in front of Dib, hugging his legs to his chest. The smile faded away and he buried his face in his knees. "What will I do now, Dib?" he mumbled.

Dib reached up to touch the wound on his head. It was still bleeding pretty badly. "Well, you can start by getting me a first-aid kit so that I don't pass out from blood loss."

This is perhaps my favorite chapter ever.

Again, this will NOT be a ZADR fic. Just ZADF.