Chapter 13 ~ You Have A Way Of Keeping Control
Title: Unsaid Warning, by THC
Notes: I think there's only one or two chapters to go. I really wish I hadn't forgotten about Guy so much.
Guy was worried. He had watched Connie over the past few weeks. He watched as she seemed to revert to the same girl they all knew before the summer. He watched as Julie's worry for her friend began to dwindle, and her interest in Portman took the number one slot on her priority list.
He watched Connie act as if she hadn't spent the first month of school acting like she despised all of them. As if she hated herself.
They all thought she was back. They all thought she was ok.
Guy did not. Something was still not right with her. Something was missing.
He had known her all his life, and loved her for just as long.
Which was why he was knocking on her door.
She opened the door. "Hey, Guy." She said, wearing a smile he didn't recognise.
"Hi, Con." He took a deep breath. "I was wondering if you wanted to go out somewhere, a movie or something?"
She shrugged awkwardly. "I don't know, Guy…"
"No strings. No dates. I just feel like some company tonight." He said gently.
"I don't know if I'd be much company." She told him. "Maybe another time."
"Connie," he reached out to touch her hand. "I miss you." That one statement could be taken any number of ways, and she realised that.
Her face fell slightly. "I miss how it was." She admitted. "I just don't feel like going out tonight."
"Promise me that next time I ask you won't say no." He implored.
She gave him a faint smile, a ghost of the old Connie he knew and loved. "Ok."
He smiled back at her. "Night, Connie."
"Night, Guy."
*~*~*~*~*
Connie sat down on her bed and reached for the phone. She was glad that Julie was out tonight. She hadn't been going out much since their fight, wanting to keep an eye on Connie. It was irritating.
Celine picked up after the first ring. "Hello?"
"Cel? It's Connie."
"Hey, Con. How's it going? Did the plan work?"
"Not really." For the first time in a long while it occurred to Connie that what she was doing wasn't right. Normal people didn't behave like this. Then again, 'normal' people didn't need to, she reminded herself.
"What do you mean, not really? Tell me." Celine asked in a business-like tone.
"I did what you said, but I'm gaining weight." Connie told her.
"You're gaining weight? How can that happen if you're…?"
"I don't know. I really don't." That wasn't entirely true. There was just one reason why she might be gaining weight despite not digesting food. She sighed. She thought she could tell Celine everything, she was wrong. "On the plus side, it's got everyone off my back." She said brightly, though she didn't feel happy. "Maybe it will take awhile to drop the weight again."
"Maybe. Let me know how it goes, Con."
They spoke awhile longer, Celine filled her in on what was happening in her life. Who was wearing what, who was dating who, all the things that had seemed important towards the end of the summer.
Connie only kept one ear open to the conversation. Her mind was elsewhere. She flipped through her diary, counting the weeks.
*~*~*~*~*
Guy managed to catch Julie at her locker during break. "Hey, Jules."
"Hi. How's life?" She asked, searching through her locker.
"The usual. You?"
"Be better if I could find my biology folder." She replied, still fighting with her locker.
"Jules, how's Connie doing?"
She stopped rummaging and turned to face him. "She's doing really well. She's eating and she's almost back to her old self."
"So you think she's ok?" He asked with a frown.
"Why? Don't you?"
He shrugged. "I don't know. I barely ever see her, but I don't…" He sighed. "If you were that depressed, would just one conversation completely turn you around?"
Julie frowned, turning over his words. "But she seems fine. I caught her weighing herself the other day and she's gained weight. She seemed fine about it."
"So, maybe she's not starving herself now, maybe it's something else." He persisted. "You live with her, you know her best."
The bell rang, cutting their conversation short.
"We'll talk later." He said.
"Ok." Julie sighed and went back to searching for her biology folder, Guy's words playing heavily on her mind.
*~*~*~*~*
"Study jam at Portman's. We're gonna do all our homework tonight so we've got the entire weekend free." Julie said, rushing into her room and grinning at Connie. She grabbed some books off her shelf.
"Don't you usually do that anyway?" Connie asked.
"Yeah, but I'm trying to get Portman to do the same." She rolled her eyes. "It could be an exercise in futility, but you never know. My model student behaviour might rub off on him. I'll be back later, but I was thinking, do you want to go shopping or something tomorrow?"
Connie shrugged. "Ok." She said in a neutral tone. She saw the look on Julie's face when she mentioned a shopping trip. It meant bonding. It meant treating Connie like glass. It meant lots of talking to make sure Connie was still aboard the sanity bus. "Have fun with your study session." She added, it's what the old Connie would have said.
Julie grinned again. "Yeah, right. See you later."
Connie breathed a sigh of relief when she left. She waited a few minutes to make sure that Julie wouldn't come bursting back in having forgotten something, then she dragged out the scales tucked underneath her bed.
Another pound heavier. That was four pounds in total that she had gained in only a few weeks.
She felt tears trickling down her face. This was not good. She had barely eaten and yet she still gained weight. She put her hand on her stomach sighing deeply.
She wasn't an idiot. She was beginning to catch on. She didn't even need to stick her fingers down her throat to make herself sick now.
She looked down at her diary. Up until July there was a red dot on that appeared at the beginning of every month. It hadn't appeared since.